2016 resolution: Get off Twitter, for all but...
2016 resolution: Get off Twitter, for all but writing-promotional purposes, until I lose 32 pounds, one for every thousand followers.
2015
5848 Tweets, 53 Publications, 15 Posts
we are currently watching gilmore girls in our home
i know what automating screenshots is like and it's nice to...
which reminds me i need to postpone drinks
katie can we put this behind us and just agree that what...
i still publish on my medium blog
and haver
you misspelled knob
i've seen lower
also i think you are being really judgmental because i...
i'm always *w*racked with anxiety also unwarranted is...
have you been hacked
did you look through it though
I DO NOW
is the twitter card for this an automated screenshot?...
@ftrain @ginatrapani is the twitter card for this an automated screenshot? because that is very on point.
i'd like to add you to my professional network on linkedin...
i'd like to add you to my professional network on linkedin https://ftrain. thinkup.
my tweets were pretty bad a lot of the time too but that's...
don't make this awk jack
(tbh I always love pipe-delimited because you can see the...
https://csvkit.readthedocs.org/en/0.9.1/scripts/csvformat.ht...
@jackrusher @felis_rex @larsonite https://csvkit. readthedocs.
yeah that's the danger zone HOWEVER "csvformat...
@jackrusher @felis_rex @larsonite yeah that's the danger zone HOWEVER "csvformat ~/Dropbox/org/evil.
OOF
first of all i listen to all the raps
is this just some stealth attempt to get me to listen to...
I just think we don't talk about insufferability enough...
I just think we don't talk about insufferability enough even when it's clearly the guiding characteristic of today's social intercourse.
Rusty literally made the “they couldn't get Paul” joke I...
@rustyk5 @karenkho Rusty literally made the “they couldn't get Paul” joke I mean it was the perfect setup.
I have 30 gigs at least.
@patbits I have 30 gigs at least.
that was HILARIOUS
I encourage you to make a list and share it with them.
I encourage you to make a list and share it with them.
Sorry, let me rephrase that. In what way were YOU most...
Sorry, let me rephrase that. In what way were YOU most insufferable for 2015?
It may be the time I wrote about poetry.
It may be the time I wrote about poetry.
I've got it down to maybe three pieces on Medium.
@ftrain I've got it down to maybe three pieces on Medium.
down to the avatar its SO good
Of all the bizzarre cultural roles into which we have...
Of all the bizzarre cultural roles into which we have thrust people, “appearing in Star Wars” is probably the weirdest.
tractors
My children have now talked loudly for seven straight...
My children have now talked loudly for seven straight hours. My wife calls Advil “adult Skittles.
she is really great and i don't know why she's not more in...
this is so weirdly watchable https://www.youtube.com/watch?v...
this is so weirdly watchable https://www. youtube.
Right, you can start there, see how it feels.
@davidhsiegel Right, you can start there, see how it feels.
This is the last thing I will write in 2015....
This is the last thing I will write in 2015. http://www.
its just a total cultural disaster zone
I once ran a werewolf game pretending to be a new yorker...
it's so skeevy
I don't think they ever sued Zotero tho.
@mcclainwatson I don't think they ever sued Zotero tho.
it's a form of cultural insanity that they aren't; same...
@knowtheory @carlmalamud it's a form of cultural insanity that they aren't; same with library of congress subject headings, etc.
there's always "reasons" for this sort of garb and those...
i mean just also have some damn sense sometimes copyright...
law is gross https://www.techdirt.com/articles/20151224/2358...
law is gross https://www. techdirt.
my god
this will account for 90% of blog posts over the next 25...
Beautiful
Beautiful by Paul Ford I used to tutor this guy, I’ll call him James. I was about twenty, and this was twenty years ago.
wow
Amazing book covers. http://causticcovercritic.blogspot.com/...
Amazing book covers. http://causticcovercritic.
https://vine.co/v/OQqxU7KFzKY
https://vine.
https://medium.com/@lauraolin/the-most-important-dog-vines-o...
@lauraolin /the-most-important-dog-vines-of-2k15-1fe72866d441#. uaosx2dif" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.
oh man AGREED
so tired https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/68149365263237529...
so tired https://twitter.
plus a number of the women in the catalog now have twelve...
Holiday week rush hour is a portrait of the perfect New...
Holiday week rush hour is a portrait of the perfect New York.
I mean that question mark
the typography too its so intense
https://m.flickr.com/#/photos/missjille/9754066016/in/set-72...
https://m. flickr.
We are watching Gilmore Girls. Unrelated, here's a scan of...
We are watching Gilmore Girls. Unrelated, here's a scan of the Fall 1996 Delia*s catalog.
managing white space is a big issue at nearly every tech...
Rory is volunteering for Habitat and her hammer is wearing...
Rory is volunteering for Habitat and her hammer is wearing a dress.
oh he already said tabs
emacs with nxml, which was predictable and pretty smart
Twitter keeps giving finn
I just follow team convention, tends to be spaces. Spent...
@isaac32767 I just follow team convention, tends to be spaces. Spent years in XML/XSLT world; all whitespace rules since then seem normal.
we ARE!
@jennschiffer we ARE!
It is so weirdly ironic to watch a bunch of programmers...
It is so weirdly ironic to watch a bunch of programmers argue fiercely about the correct way to structure white spaces.
wait but the two of you have basically insane standards...
What a bunch of characters!
What a bunch of characters!
whitespace-only commits are so bad and noisey
Only 18 hours left to join the 1,300 people who have voted...
Only 18 hours left to join the 1,300 people who have voted on a question that I will never ask again, even in jest: https://twitter.
this is kicking off my horror vacui for reals
matt sweet baby jesus you literally had meaningless spaces...
Relax, we are all history's worst monster.
@ginatrapani Relax, we are all history's worst monster.
I remember this too.
@levistahl @john_overholt I remember this too.
HMMMMMm maybe this isn't it. It sure looks right. ARGH.
@levistahl @john_overholt HMMMMMm maybe this isn't it. It sure looks right.
Submission.
Submission.
I think it has like, a section that tells you that YOU CAN...
omg i've been looking for this book forever, I...
@john_overholt omg i've been looking for this book forever, I misremembered it as "the kid's almanac.
Now I'm depressed at all the times I've seen people told...
@ginatrapani Now I'm depressed at all the times I've seen people told they're doing it wrong because they indented incorrectly.
You know it's true. The #1 thing that encourages people to...
@ginatrapani You know it's true. The #1 thing that encourages people to keep coding is working code.
since when has that been on the list
wow okay yes
But I mean, Emacs.
@sheep_robby But I mean, Emacs.
They're both really amazing free software created by...
@sheep_robby They're both really amazing free software created by dedicated communities, and it's a shame they can't share more code.
CSV because EVERYTHING has a robust importer now. However,...
@larsonite CSV because EVERYTHING has a robust importer now. However, people should be sharing gzipped SQLite3 dbs via torrent.
The conversation that follows this poll is a perfect...
The conversation that follows this poll is a perfect introduction to programming. https://twitter.
Tabs or spaces?
Tabs or spaces?
i haven't seen mary poppins since i was four. or bambi. i'm...
@6other i haven't seen mary poppins since i was four. or bambi.
wearing work-appropriate clothing
and then the painful realization, covered in baby vomit,...
There's also that class of things that cause interest to...
@skamille There's also that class of things that cause interest to *increase* when others do them (homeowning, childhaving, moneymaking).
A short story about a pandemic done as a food blog...
A short story about a pandemic done as a food blog http://clarkesworldmagazine.
Jesus that song
smh
who is shown as a terrible mother and clown what even with...
We just watched Mary Poppins. Maybe 30% of it is about...
We just watched Mary Poppins. Maybe 30% of it is about global banking at the end of Britain's imperial century.
Division by Coke Zero.
@goldman Division by Coke Zero.
lol
wow this podcast has never existed and it already has...
Oof yeah. I was about to type “Man do I miss BYTE,” and...
@judell Oof yeah. I was about to type “Man do I miss BYTE,” and then I remembered that you have way more reason to miss it than I do.
Although the sheer raw volume of good technology guidance...
@judell Although the sheer raw volume of good technology guidance has increased hugely, but it's drowned out.
The average quality of actual technology guidance seems to...
Anyway I have a lot of thoughts on this. Like, we had...
@judell Anyway I have a lot of thoughts on this. Like, we had Computer Shopper!
Oh wait, I see. Except it kind of IS innovation because...
@judell Oh wait, I see. Except it kind of IS innovation because everything has changed around the wheels.
i think it was very similar in a ton of ways but there is...
Reinventing the wheel is necessary if they keep making new...
Reinventing the wheel is necessary if they keep making new kinds of road.
It's true! We should learn to appreciate it more....
@judell It's true! We should learn to appreciate it more.
I mean...it probably truly was. It's fun to use in-browser,...
@ben__bradley I mean... it probably truly was.
they'll never let me
I think in some cases function keys and keyboard overlays...
I think in some cases function keys and keyboard overlays are acceptable interface choices.
We're probably going to get back to 1989 programming some...
We're probably going to get back to 1989 programming some day, maybe by 2020.
Need to compile? It's not scary. Hit F9.
Need to compile? It's not scary.
this is for like only extreme nerds but sakes alive borland...
this is for like only extreme nerds but sakes alive borland turbo c for DOS was the nicest programming environment https://archive. org/details/msdos_borland_turbo_c_2.
i want to love this but a typical scene looks like...
@jpotisch i want to love this but a typical scene looks like https://twitter.
this series is my favorite thing I've read in months
whoa
show me people listening to dogs bark in 1710
show me life in a cave 25,000 years ago
show me the newspapers i'd read in chicago in 1910
thinking about http://oldweb.today and what other systems...
thinking about http://oldweb.
don't worry matt
no i met the guy he's a student seems chill
Worry Quest is an attempt to soothe anxiety via app:...
Worry Quest is an attempt to soothe anxiety via app: https://www. indiegogo.
oh my god
oh man rip leia soon then
I mean, works perfectly.
@redkeg I mean, works perfectly.
Has anyone analyzed The Force Awakens in the context of the...
Has anyone analyzed The Force Awakens in the context of the theory that everyone in Star Wars is a sentient bee? http://www.
just check the menu for the "not fried in lard" icon.
@jacobyjyoung @joshuatopolsky just check the menu for the "not fried in lard" icon.
By people who were barely adults! It's wild.
@jackrusher By people who were barely adults! It's wild.
so good
leah
America means never choosing!
@jfeckstein America means never choosing!
Is there anything more magical in this world than piles of...
Is there anything more magical in this world than piles of cheap stuff?
“Twas the night before start-up.” 30 years ago, this...
“Twas the night before start-up. ” 30 years ago, this Christmas poem RFC about debugging was published by Vint Cerf.
Just took the twins up to the roof of the apartment...
Just took the twins up to the roof of the apartment building to prove that reindeer have a place to land.
Jesus that is a year.
@shani_o Jesus that is a year.
Right, and the hairstyles need a lot of work.
@kendall Right, and the hairstyles need a lot of work.
Entrepreneurship can happen everywhere, Tim.
@tcarmody Entrepreneurship can happen everywhere, Tim.
Dan you need to let yourself Imagine.
@dansinker @harrisj Dan you need to let yourself Imagine.
One of the major risks to the brand is that so much of the...
One of the major risks to the brand is that so much of the material is in black and white, and in 2D. Start with a 3D model of Shea Stadium.
So young, cool people on the Internet are asking, “Who...
So young, cool people on the Internet are asking, “Who cares? ” about the Beatles.
TMBG killed it tho
We did get to see a little with that Cirque de Soleil...
We did get to see a little with that Cirque de Soleil thing, but imagine the Marvel/X-Men's Blackbird taking off to the remix of Blackbird.
Part of me really wants to see what it would be like if...
Part of me really wants to see what it would be like if Disney bought the Beatles and rebooted the brand.
this is a great pairing of author and editor. patrick...
@patbits @adrjeffries this is a great pairing of author and editor. patrick DOOOOO IT.
it's so good, the fairy just chooses death immediately
Leah shouldn't you be working on your zine?
@leahfinnegan @rosecrans Leah shouldn't you be working on your zine?
I agree with @rosecrans, cassette tapes are garbage....
I agree with @rosecrans , cassette tapes are garbage. http://www.
come home the children ask for you
rich toddlers have a calmness and sense of self-assurance...
shit we have to help those kids
Do rich people actually put make their toddlers wear...
Do rich people actually put make their toddlers wear suspenders or is that just jewelry ads?
I've often wondered if there is really expensive Agile...
I've often wondered if there is really expensive Agile training held on a private river with real foxes and chickens.
So @18F has had an amazing year and that image/caption is...
So @18F has had an amazing year and that image/caption is also amazing.
Via https://twitter.com/18F/status/679813274586755072...
Via https://twitter. com/18F/status/679813274586755072 https://twitter.
they should turn on taint checking
its not unusual to see me cryin'
“It’s not unusual for employees to be wiped out while...
whatever gets the press I guess
nothing much to report really, just if you go to...
@rachsig nothing much to report really, just if you go to http://chubbychipotle.
That anti-Chipotle campaign is funded by fast food fwiw...
That anti-Chipotle campaign is funded by fast food fwiw https://en. m.
oh yeah its from these horrible people...
@cnqmdi oh yeah its from these horrible people https://en. m.
Right, okay, there's been some whole campaign I see now....
Right, okay, there's been some whole campaign I see now. https://twitter.
“There is no E. coli in Chipotle.” Umm actually there is if...
“There is no E. coli in Chipotle.
holy shit their heads are even at the same angle
Artisanal Java is hand-crafted from bean to jar.
Artisanal Java is hand-crafted from bean to jar.
C-3PO is Rey's mom.
@patbits C-3PO is Rey's mom.
What a difference two years makes....
What a difference two years makes. https://twitter.
That picture keeps getting better every time I look at it.
@redkeg That picture keeps getting better every time I look at it.
Sometimes the fact that if I stayed on this bus an extra...
Sometimes the fact that if I stayed on this bus an extra 1/2-hour it would take me to Coney Island just kills me. I know I owe you an email.
Today I took my kids on the subway to Manhattan and...
Today I took my kids on the subway to Manhattan and helplessly watched as they touched the poles and then licked their hands.
I hope this film has a touching message about sharing...
I hope this film has a touching message about sharing because turns out I need that.
Wow I just briefly became angry because there are noisy...
Wow I just briefly became angry because there are noisy children waiting to see this noisy movie for children.
tired of this twisted game https://twitter.com/ftrain/status...
@on3ness @totallyslutsky tired of this twisted game https://twitter.
you're moving back to NYC?
@jenniferdaniel you're moving back to NYC?
he was complaining about footnotes to me and when I went to...
not science babe though that was magical
I read all of these and just about all of them left me...
just chillin
If you're not the sausage-making equipment, you're the...
If you're not the sausage-making equipment, you're the sausage.
There are 3 sorts of people: Those who sell sausage-making...
There are 3 sorts of people: Those who sell sausage-making equipment; those who curse how the sausage is made; and those who are sausage.
Good point! Added!
@aniqahthm @chaisesettables Good point! Added!
god i've never seen that behavior before you must have done...
just relax lee he will not hurt you he will only be kind
jesus lee i'll TEACH you
Casey says watch this/I hate all videos of people talking...
Casey says watch this/I hate all videos of people talking but I also love to self-promote so https://twitter. com/caseyjohnston/status/679328289538760707 https://t.
that talk was originally a NYTM kill!
@caseyjohnston that talk was originally a NYTM kill!
I hate the site of my giant jarbly fucking head is the only...
I made a list of the things I remember writing in 2015....
I made a list of the things I remember writing in 2015. @ftrain /what-paul-ford-wrote-said-in-2015-162bf67a7a09" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.
which, i mean, i'm good on tote bags
No publication has ever sent me a pin before....
No publication has ever sent me a pin before. https://twitter.
Oh my god this is one of our worst and most vivid travel...
@skamille Oh my god this is one of our worst and most vivid travel memories. Also we had to bring the car seat with us to California.
oh my god and Christmas week I'm hyperventilating thinking
you can really work this one out from first principles
can you get them to turn the camera the right way next time...
I read that he didn't want to do sequels in general
here's a video that you both deserve...
@anildash @katienotopoulos here's a video that you both deserve https://www. youtube.
the first four hours are fun but it goes a little woo for...
the saddest stans of all
i mean jesus christ we GET it
omg the dog on there "I am a dog (woof :o3 ) but my parents...
Nitpricking
this is not my work account
thanks to disney there will be star wars movies until after...
What Paul Ford Wrote/Said in 2015
What Paul Ford Wrote/Said in 2015 That’s me! This too.
not a lot of actual surprises left tbh although I'm...
is running for office on this platform
oh, well, that's about what I would have guessed
oh lots of people want to know
what are cummies?
@katienotopoulos what are cummies?
I don't know if people know this but the Beagle Bros...
I don't know if people know this but the Beagle Bros started out in the early 1980s by using remelted software.
Exactly you can FEEL the Sheraton Ballroom when you see...
@MatthewJBrown Exactly you can FEEL the Sheraton Ballroom when you see this award.
“Today, Bill, Cub, Chuck, and Ted are here to bestow this...
“Today, Bill, Cub, Chuck, and Ted are here to bestow this Certificate of Recognition for BeagleWorks.
i really like this award, especially the names, which are...
i really like this award, especially the names, which are the businessiest names ever via http://www. kansasfest.
huh @joshuatopolsky this really gets a lot looser after...
Yeah but you got the entire plot of PATTERNS for free?
@bennyfactor Yeah but you got the entire plot of PATTERNS for free?
For context here is the sad racist Alf video...
For context here is the sad racist Alf video https://www. youtube.
Listen to Tomorrow with @joshuatopolsky if you want to hear...
Listen to Tomorrow with @joshuatopolsky if you want to hear tall nerds including me talk about waterboarding Alf https://soundcloud.
I missed this it goes deep. https://twitter.com/michaelbshan...
I missed this it goes deep. https://twitter.
Williamsburg defines the fine line between Bros. and bros.
Williamsburg defines the fine line between Bros. and bros.
I wonder why the Mast Bros. won't just produce birth...
I wonder why the Mast Bros. won't just produce birth certificates and prove once and for all that they were born in 1880.
December 21, 2015 - Breakfast
Food Qty Calories Cereal breakfast, typical (2 c. cereal, 1 c.
Awful lot of seen-Star-Wars privilege in this timeline.
Awful lot of seen-Star-Wars privilege in this timeline.
oh wow that cover story
try as hard as I might I can't figure out why CD-ROM Today...
try as hard as I might I can't figure out why CD-ROM Today Magazine went under https://en. m.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_defunct_American_per...
https://en. m.
how could you read that entire thing
I wonder if @harrisj is harrisj in that screenshot?
@dphiffer I wonder if @harrisj is harrisj in that screenshot?
ahhhhh okay. yeah there were a number of comments-on-pages...
@dphiffer ahhhhh okay.
was it some kind of proxy then? there were a few of these...
@dphiffer was it some kind of proxy then? there were a few of these floating around at different pts.
wow
wait what was the experience
this is a good idea!
@patbits this is a good idea!
i...wow... https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-intersect...
i... wow...
i kept trying to think of couples that could top this but...
December 20, 2015 - Snack
Cookies, what is wrong with me. Also cereal.
“I could hear their dogs peeing on the floor upstairs.”...
“I could hear their dogs peeing on the floor upstairs. ” — http://www.
December 20, 2015 - Lunch
Food Qty Calories Cheddar, 1 c. 0.
December 20, 2015 - Breakfast
Boy the fever is on right, I've piled up way too many calories. The holidays are exhausting.
December 20, 2015 - Dinner
Food Qty Calories Dumpling, homemade, 1 meat dumpling 5 400 Edamame, cookied, 1 c.
YouTube is telling me that there is a moment in time when a...
YouTube is telling me that there is a moment in time when a food thing ceases to be whatever it is, and transitions to a cake topper.
“tomorrow we will come back and do the makeup on this...
Holy shit the cookie decorations videos on YouTube are...
Holy shit the cookie decorations videos on YouTube are making me panic about the future of labor.
It's from the New Yorker.
It's from the New Yorker.
we are at like eight of these today :/
I keep thinking about this cartoon....
I keep thinking about this cartoon. https://twitter.
this is so real
I just think everyone should TRY the patriarchy, you know?...
@bn2b I just think everyone should TRY the patriarchy, you know? And then decide if it's right for them.
I personally can't figure out the problem?
@bn2b I personally can't figure out the problem?
have you seen the Joe Sacco comic thingy? It's real neat. I...
@shani_o have you seen the Joe Sacco comic thingy? It's real neat.
Emacs fireplace https://github.com/johanvts/emacs-fireplace
Emacs fireplace https://github.
Jet fuel can't remelt steel beams.
Jet fuel can't remelt steel beams.
I'm not usually an angry person but something about the...
I'm not usually an angry person but something about the phrase “bean-to-bar” makes me seethe with irrational hatred.
Wtf is happening https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/678005379...
Wtf is happening https://twitter.
god now i'd have to find it but i will keep an eye out!
@oubliette @jeremyzilar god now i'd have to find it but i will keep an eye out!
i own a copy of this, it's really something
“She gave up the Lord's time,” Herndon continued. “She gave...
“She gave up the Lord's time,” Herndon continued. “She gave it up and gave it to Mohammed.
i wish I were there
its the best
i'm sorry for your death
It feels like we got through maybe six whole months without...
It feels like we got through maybe six whole months without autotuning a low-income person who witnessed a crime? I guess you can't be sure.
via @waxpancake http://www.clickhole.com/video/houses-amazin...
via @waxpancake http://www. clickhole.
I wonder if these companies have products I could use? But...
I wonder if these companies have products I could use? But they are dancing?
depends
I mean it deends
dooooo it
I don't understand how to be alive right now...
I don't understand how to be alive right now https://twitter.
i'm happy to have a piece in this book of nerdy stories by...
i'm happy to have a piece in this book of nerdy stories by nerds for nerds published by a nerdy advocacy org https://www. eff.
hahah oh god that is exactly how I feel waiting for this...
I mean you are basically showing an adult woman your secret...
this can only lead to you feeling embarrassed?
@patbits @SavageGazelle this can only lead to you feeling embarrassed?
true
Which is
yeah I'm garbage, I had a fight about a sweater with a tiny...
we are all terrible parents
tell me a
but they have to pee
It just needs to be beautiful and bright, doesn't need to...
It just needs to be beautiful and bright, doesn't need to be corporate or “about” Postlight or the web or anything.
So it's 5' by 7' minimum or much bigger, and will be on...
So it's 5' by 7' minimum or much bigger, and will be on canvas, right when you come off the elevators.
We at @PostlightAgency NYC have budget to do an abstract...
We at @PostlightAgency NYC have budget to do an abstract mural on our walls. We want to hear from all kinds of artists.
i kind of need to floss i was feeling kind of observed
OH MY GOD I FORGOT
what are you trying to tell me kevin
totally
I met a guy at a party a couple months back who ghostwrites...
I met a guy at a party a couple months back who ghostwrites bios of famous teen vloggers, he says it's a ruuuuugggggged scene.
This seems stressful http://fusion.net/story/244545/famous-...
This seems stressful http://fusion.
strong
holy shit that's stong
omg our EXACT sentiment
I'm biased but this is a really pleasant company with some...
I'm biased but this is a really pleasant company with some great engineers and designers. The remotes are in NYC.
every now and then I notice how well they execute and how...
oh THAT is where that's from
you know what's really depressing? minor league chew.
@leahfinnegan you know what's really depressing? minor league chew.
this is very fair
or you could also do graffiti with a brick tied to your...
I know that owning firearms does not automatically make you...
I know that owning firearms does not automatically make you a horrible garbage monster who believes tiny children should die at random.
One way to support the second amendment is to demand a man...
One way to support the second amendment is to demand a man dig up the body of his murdered kindergarten-aged son.
“Wolfgang does not wish to speak with you unless you exhume...
“Wolfgang does not wish to speak with you unless you exhume Noah’s body and prove to the world you lost your son. ” http://www.
sure of course let me just get to a landline
wait should i call the number or not
http://blog.dilbert.com/post/133406477506/global-gender-war
@jackrusher http://blog. dilbert.
in the former, no, but in the latter, yes :(
tbh http://readme.org is the only one i'd want
@dphiffer tbh http://readme.
It's just too soon to tell.
@leahfinnegan It's just too soon to tell.
It's really warm, but don't draw any conclusions.
It's really warm, but don't draw any conclusions.
I know it's tempting to project some sort of meaning into...
I know it's tempting to project some sort of meaning into the above but the larger issue is that our society continues to produce Dilbert.
Internet 1996: http://pied.nu/banned/the_Dilbert_Hole/...
Internet 1996: http://pied. nu/banned/the_Dilbert_Hole/ Internet 2015: http://mradilbert.
we'll never see it, so we can only assume so!
@maureenflaherty @jackrusher @missginsu we'll never see it, so we can only assume so!
“Why I can’t stop putting dildos into the hands of powerful...
“Why I can’t stop putting dildos into the hands of powerful conservatives” @mathowie @mathowie /why-i-can-t-stop-putting-dildos-into-the-hands-of-powerful-conservatives-2899de83d47e" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.
Unsolicited Rejection
Unsolicited Rejection “Our organization holds a conference every year. We use a wiki to make a list of the people we’d like to see speak.
Yes—we want people pinning!
Yes—we want people pinning!
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/675511952840486914/photo/1
@maureenflaherty @jenniferdaniel @leahfinnegan https://twitter.
agreed
thank you Daniel! Very kind.
@DFenjves thank you Daniel! Very kind.
amazing
Thousands of words of fighting related to commas in decimal...
Thousands of words of fighting related to commas in decimal parsing https://github.
Jack what was it called
yesiam
i mean maybe it HAS?
@sophaskins i mean maybe it HAS?
we always forget and they always remind us
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/675054710429192194/photo/1
https://twitter.
it's definitely a taco
is this snow fall
what is HAPPENING
lolol
obviously for christmas you should give that child a...
did you watch charlize theron http://www.nytimes.com/interac...
did you watch charlize theron #charlize -theron" target="_blank" rel="noopener">http://www. nytimes.
I think the ultimate Hollywood magic trick is getting...
I think the ultimate Hollywood magic trick is getting infinite press coverage for free.
i'm out of town otherwise i'd be totally there and would...
this is okay but it would be better if she did it while...
it's 12,000 ads for CAROL interspersed with video of famous...
hope you like pre-rolls http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2...
hope you like pre-rolls http://www. nytimes.
our incredible journey
Poll: LinkedIn will live longer than you will.
Poll: LinkedIn will live longer than you will.
i wish linkedin would leave me alone
I accept that this might be the peak of my time on Twitter.
@benhammersley I accept that this might be the peak of my time on Twitter.
cool to see so many brands working together!
@MicrosoftNY @jennschiffer cool to see so many brands working together!
I am very disciplined when working with others but when...
I'm there for me
the problem is I'm so good at puns people would scream too...
The new Apple iPhone battery-pack case is such a crime...
The new Apple iPhone battery-pack case is such a crime against design that it should be charged as an accessory.
this is what it looks like to write a book using github...
this is what it looks like to write a book using github https://twitter.
No, perhaps as painted on screen?But in most rich text...
@CAYdenberg No, perhaps as painted on screen?
had a really great pun worked out that ended "charged as...
It is critical to remember that a horizontal line in MSWord...
It is critical to remember that a horizontal line in MSWord is not a typographical element but rather the bottom border of an invisible box.
I was here tonight. https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/674752...
I was here tonight. https://twitter.
can't say I blame you
I know that earworms can play on repeat within your brain...
I know that earworms can play on repeat within your brain and drive you crazy, but don't give up—you've got the music in you.
no I just found.it one day
@yoz @heatregister @jong @harrisj no I just found.
The weird thing with Trump is that NYC would last about...
The weird thing with Trump is that NYC would last about twenty minutes without Muslim labor, before regressing into total savagery.
wow that's a new one to me. There are hundreds, maybe...
@lmatsakis wow that's a new one to me. There are hundreds, maybe thousands!
lol
I miss the mark most times
But I mean this is the job is to help the humans do what...
But I mean this is the job is to help the humans do what they want not what you want.
sigh
Sometimes I fall short.
Sometimes I fall short.
Anything that doesn't do that can be safely cut.
Anything that doesn't do that can be safely cut.
I have a very simple strategy when it comes to writing or...
I have a very simple strategy when it comes to writing or making things. You should always try to give the listener or reader a superpower.
Wow people on Twitter have a lot of wrong opinions about...
Wow people on Twitter have a lot of wrong opinions about podcasts.
don't reply I already reported myself to Christine
we did areas of high gloss paint up to three feet from the...
matt why are you tweeting you have to do more work
Yes, this is real. Gotta happen!
@jackrusher Yes, this is real. Gotta happen!
omg rich and i will be space ghost totally come be brak
LOTS of opinions on podcasts; what i'm hearing is: two...
LOTS of opinions on podcasts; what i'm hearing is: two white guys talking tech for 90 minutes, no editing, 10 min intro music = gold.
i deserve no better
i'm a leo it's all good
this is 100% the music for our new podcast probably THRONE...
this is 100% the music for our new podcast probably THRONE OF BLOOD http://www. audionetwork.
oh awesome
ACHIEVABLE goals lee
what features do you look for in a podcast were i to start...
those dudes who manage index funds and tell you not to...
[throws laptop into bathtub] there i solved email
EXACTLY
come on dude this only took me like a minute to...
come on dude this only took me like a minute to solve https://twitter.
oh god i'd love to live in chicago
I hope they know how amazing you are.
@reppep I hope they know how amazing you are.
why do you live in that hellhole when there is a much...
this is very cool
lol this perfect
tho "newsworthiness" ruins everything
camille you'll never get that all-important lobsters invite...
for accountability, the tech news site lobsters keeps track...
for accountability, the tech news site lobsters keeps track of/makes public who invited whom https://lobste. rs/u/ https://twitter.
Browser plugins are like Rumpelstiltskin — they promise to...
Browser plugins are like Rumpelstiltskin — they promise to spin the web into gold, then demand your firstborn child. https://posts.
[grizzled man speaks] this looks shopped [holds up hook...
Patrick whoever did that brilliant thing needs MUCH MORE...
@patbits @Junichi__Okada Patrick whoever did that brilliant thing needs MUCH MORE time on their hands.
they sorted that crack along many axes!
@harrisj they sorted that crack along many axes!
Things arranged neatly. https://twitter.com/NYPD70Pct/status...
Things arranged neatly. https://twitter.
lol, yes, we're on that now too thank you
All fixed, thanks to @mutewinter and @tinystride —thanks...
@skeuomorf All fixed, thanks to @mutewinter and @tinystride —thanks for bringing it to our attention, Mohammed.
fundable idea
KAREN...well, I mean, of course you can
@karenmcgrane @PostlightAgency KAREN...
maybe it's time for a group of young hackers to create a...
Well...that was more of a researched memo. Remember real...
@gknauss @shellen Well... that was more of a researched memo.
With total sincerity, if we can provide any more...
@shellen With total sincerity, if we can provide any more information, please let us know.
It's a hell of a product!
@shellen It's a hell of a product!
Jason! Do you work there now? Hi!
@shellen Jason! Do you work there now?
The issue is that there's no easy CSS/DOM match because...
@gcarothers The issue is that there's no easy CSS/DOM match because insertion happens well after a load. But we'd welcome patches.
sigh we're using a nice decentralized third-party service...
@skeuomorf sigh we're using a nice decentralized third-party service and are switching soon!
Something I just published: “If Pinterest is going to do...
Something I just published: “If Pinterest is going to do the wrong thing, they should at least do it well. ” https://posts.
but jenn this is two seconds AFTER the dom is loaded
Stick a pin in it!
Stick a pin in it! Pinterest is placing promotional ads for itself onto web pages, via its Chrome plugin.
why in god's name wasn't @jenniferdaniel given this...
why in god's name wasn't @jenniferdaniel given this assignment http://www. nytimes.
probably because you're poopsocking
home from work
thanks you've given me . . . . . pause
@meyerweb thanks you've given me . .
There's a whole class of software for megachurch management...
There's a whole class of software for megachurch management and I bet some of those companies are pewnicorns.
I'm sorry I was on the bus.
I'm sorry I was on the bus.
Charlie Chaplin's United Artists wasn't a tech company but...
Charlie Chaplin's United Artists wasn't a tech company but it might have been the first Oonacorn.
Welcome to Selenic Holdings the first lunar incubator. Our...
Welcome to Selenic Holdings the first lunar incubator.
long bus ride
My interactive fiction startup is going to devour its...
My interactive fiction startup is going to devour its competition and become a gruenicorn.
What would you call an Uber for chimney sweeps making more...
What would you call an Uber for chimney sweeps making more than a billion dollars a year?
its a challenge because you also end up with a poon icorn
Maybe Breather will be known as a noonicorn.
Maybe Breather will be known as a noonicorn.
Which brings me to large Israeli startups.
Which brings me to large Israeli startups.
Fred Wilson says there is opportunity in lists...
Fred Wilson says there is opportunity in lists http://avc.
Snapchat's logo is a ghost but no one calls it a Boo-nicorn.
Snapchat's logo is a ghost but no one calls it a Boo-nicorn.
If Zappos was founded today it would be a shoenicorn.
If Zappos was founded today it would be a shoenicorn.
i c u http://newyorker.com https://twitter.com/ftrain/status...
i c u http://newyorker. com https://twitter.
“It Is Impossible to Believe How Mindblowing These Amazing...
@spetulla @DenverNicks “It Is Impossible to Believe How Mindblowing These Amazing New Jobs Are” https://medium.
oh, we'll see!
@weintrauboo @caitlindewey oh, we'll see!
You've been making semantic graph progress for a LONG TIME!
@kendall You've been making semantic graph progress for a LONG TIME!
god that cover
hope u like moments
no no the remote unit delivers a steady electric shock if...
asdefslk;hadfs
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/672846927768240128/photo/1
@patbits https://twitter.
this can help https://open.spotify.com/track/3jDdpx9PMlfMBS5...
@mbostock this can help https://open. spotify.
Wi-Fi works in the bathroom.
@bravebriankim Wi-Fi works in the bathroom.
When you're done with that come see me.
When you're done with that come see me.
Today I need you to put words in the boxes and data in the...
Today I need you to put words in the boxes and data in the database, populate the variables in the templates, and put pages in the caches.
Nah I'm a MUCH better writer than programmer and I could be...
@elindie Nah I'm a MUCH better writer than programmer and I could be a lot better as a writer.
no the whole thing is weird but in a way that feels...
I mean it will happen eventually? It's just gonna take a...
@JuliaWM @jacqui I mean it will happen eventually? It's just gonna take a lot of people getting over themselves.
holy shit this ad is extraordinary
cool
“Sara is dialing in.” (Oh God.) “Via WebEx.” (Oh no.) “Can...
@merbroussard @harrisj “Sara is dialing in. ” (Oh God.
anyway we bought an apartment instead
well it was going to be only partly about hypotheticals and...
i'm so into this! I once registered http://FEATURISM.COM...
@merbroussard @harrisj i'm so into this! I once registered http://FEATURISM.
oh man what if people had to check in to meetings
i dunno with a good pitch deck it seems fundable
its basically cultural technical debt that no one can pay...
I mean I think that's what every calendar product...
omg the product I want just became CALENDER CLEANER
it might be easier, from a product perspective, to cancel...
oh no Jacob if anyone can understand you it's a machine
yes imagine travel time built in, what a miracle!
@merbroussard @harrisj yes imagine travel time built in, what a miracle!
yes and then lets use machine learning to define an actual...
it is time for a national conversation on ical
basically there's a rules-based bot that functions as a...
you know what would help is giving every meeting an email...
@harrisj you know what would help is giving every meeting an email address.
its so fundamentally broken I think we should probably be...
something is deeply wrong
is there a safe place to discuss totally reinventing...
@harrisj is there a safe place to discuss totally reinventing calendaring?
Frank Mills is a good song.
Frank Mills is a good song.
I just want out Dave
My brain is a bag of rats.
My brain is a bag of rats.
I woke up in a state of anxiety; my first thought was, “If...
I woke up in a state of anxiety; my first thought was, “If you wore a giant lemon on your head and a cape, you could be Dando Calrissian.
this in particular: http://www.edn.com/design/automotive/442...
@TiffanyW_412 this in particular: http://www. edn.
wow every day whole new worlds open up to me
“Is it a cold front?” “Yes Lisa.”
“Is it a cold front? ” “Yes Lisa.
You know who would be amazing at doing the weather? Wendy...
You know who would be amazing at doing the weather? Wendy and Lisa circa Purple Rain.
I miss that a lot when I try new big node-requiring...
@jennschiffer I miss that a lot when I try new big node-requiring frameworks, the ability to hack-and-reload one page then refactor if necc.
Right and that should be celebrated. I like big complex...
@jennschiffer Right and that should be celebrated. I like big complex front-end JS stuff too but smaller things are so true to the platform.
They're like the Unix utilities of web making and get less...
@jennschiffer They're like the Unix utilities of web making and get less respect than EVERYTHING. There's not even a name for them.
Single-HTML-page-CSS-and-JS apps are the best. Now I want...
@jennschiffer Single-HTML-page-CSS-and-JS apps are the best. Now I want to make a single-page archive + coding standards.
https://soundcloud.com/leavingrecords/sets/deantoni-parks-te...
@matthewmcvickar https://soundcloud.
sorry soundcloud my brain is FRIED
Sweet baby jesus in the manger this first track...
Sweet baby jesus in the manger this first track https://soundcloud.
THE FIRST TRACK ON SPOTIFY OMFG
“ltd. cassette available now”
@matthewmcvickar “ltd.
FINALLY
this just came in from Berlin, courtesy of @jackrusher, and...
this just came in from Berlin, courtesy of @jackrusher , and I think it provides a lot of context re: who we are now http://dn.
:(
ALL brands
Thank you, David.
@djacobs @NewRepublic Thank you, David.
ulgh sigh
I DO
You should try it!
@patbits You should try it!
gonna be a great weekend!
@sippey gonna be a great weekend!
Do you want to come on @PostlightAgency's podcast and make...
@adrjeffries Do you want to come on @PostlightAgency 's podcast and make fun of all the other corporate podcasts?
Brands are publishers now.
@adrjeffries Brands are publishers now.
Quad city djs just came on the playlist this elliptical is...
Sometimes I wonder if ironic bon mots are the best way to...
Sometimes I wonder if ironic bon mots are the best way to challenge America's most profound ongoing political and cultural failures.
Tbh I'm a bot and it was an off-by-one in my Icon code.
Tbh I'm a bot and it was an off-by-one in my Icon code.
Or am I creating a nest of sick intrigue to cover up a...
Or am I creating a nest of sick intrigue to cover up a simple error? And if so then what am I REALLY covering for?
I'm sorry I am a passive aggressive monster making you all...
I'm sorry I am a passive aggressive monster making you all think it was Friday for two seconds is how I get my sick kicks.
I wrote a thing about databases for my friends at...
I wrote a thing about databases for my friends at @NewRepublic if you want to kick off this Friday right. https://newrepublic.
spydere!
@rebeccablood spydere!
Guys you might as well make this your pinned tweet....
Guys you might as well make this your pinned tweet. https://twitter.
oh lord i can't remember! probably, but all the edits etc...
@jackrusher oh lord i can't remember! probably, but all the edits etc were in msword.
this thread is still going https://twitter.com/ftrain/status...
this thread is still going https://twitter.
is jogging burnalism
yeah, totally, have fun at the White House
MAYBE it was because you were all "let's make this business...
@anildash MAYBE it was because you were all "let's make this business work for everyone" and I was all "graphs are the future of narrative.
Are you kidding? Fort Wayne is one of my favorite cities!
@muraii Are you kidding? Fort Wayne is one of my favorite cities!
of all the people to be my destiny though i mean it's...
anil i swear to god we need to be cremated so that we can't...
lol we can both be awkward
Because a lot of weird-ass people have power over...
Because a lot of weird-ass people have power over technology and public education is the best way to bring more people to a thing.
It's a tiny part of an enormous effort to get computer...
I'm giving a talk on the 10th. It includes a big museum...
I'm giving a talk on the 10th. It includes a big museum show about the history of computers, even if I suck.
little of each
we should document these rules
i'm imaging a gushing cartoon oil well labelled PASSWORDS
this is happening in my mentions right now and i have no...
this is happening in my mentions right now and i have no idea what's going on https://twitter.
use node
it doesn't matter because you still can't hire developers...
honestly now that you did that mockup it feels a lot less...
running android
ulgh please quit this steicheny bullshit nyc...
ulgh please quit this steicheny bullshit nyc https://twitter.
oh this is so cool also i love the user acceptance testing...
NEVER
Jesus we are all going to be making connected pet amusement...
why stop at one? You can't run stock Android on your cat...
@jennschiffer why stop at one? You can't run stock Android on your cat fountain, for example.
Facebook wins the graph, WordPress wins the page, Android...
Facebook wins the graph, WordPress wins the page, Android wins IoT, but every device runs JavaScript and has a web view.
There are currently 120 billion Android users and thirteen...
There are currently 120 billion Android users and thirteen or fourteen available Android contractors.
Two of these give me the willies but feel pretty real:...
Two of these give me the willies but feel pretty real: WordPress as IDE, and Android as the universal OS. http://www.
people are REALLY into capitalism even after all these...
listen Jack stop waiting for Lesstif it's not gonna happen
i contributed
this site that emulates old browsers via docker containers...
this site that emulates old browsers via docker containers is bananas http://oldweb.
imagine if people were not hell bent on robbing things of...
@jennschiffer imagine if people were not hell bent on robbing things of joy!
i think that might be the only sensible reply?
@jennschiffer i think that might be the only sensible reply?
At some level hating Zuckerberg is a lot like loving the...
At some level hating Zuckerberg is a lot like loving the Kardashians.
humans are territorial over the craziest shit!
@jennschiffer humans are territorial over the craziest shit!
One thing you can do to get through tonight is say these...
One thing you can do to get through tonight is say these words: “It is not my money. It was never my money.
I love that there are rules as to what is and what isn't
I Dreamed of a Perfect Database
miss u jack
ghostz
I died six months ago.
@christopheredi @joshuatopolsky I died six months ago.
I was just thinking how much I love stuff like this, like...
@jackrusher I was just thinking how much I love stuff like this, like when Señor Coconut did Kraftwerk. Although here vocals are orig?
ohhhh my
just a regular writer http://articles.philly.com/1994-07-31/...
@jimaley just a regular writer http://articles. philly.
jesus christ leah
FOR REAL
also GUARANTEED to ruin at least one marriage proposal
he got really into vocabulary while being in prison in the...
years later I went and researched it and it had been...
when I was 15 I found this hand-typed "word wealth"...
shit that "IS" oh god what have I DONE
my english teacher made me not use passive voice for an...
@jimaley my english teacher made me not use passive voice for an entire year of high school and it served well!
i need a new headshot because that one is basically a lie...
i need a new headshot because that one is basically a lie now—but @firstmarkcap did a great job writing up my talk! https://twitter.
I have to stop assuming things
which I...understand I guess? I just assumed all that Total...
@johanatan which I... understand I guess?
flowdock
that would be...very uncomfortable
@gardaud that would be...
i mean you are one of the small number of people who truly...
what if...most code is bad then most software engineers...
what if... most code is bad then most software engineers are...
oh okay ms big time business journalist
huh! interesting.
@orang55 huh! interesting.
i have a gift certificate in a safe there i haven't used so...
ulgh this means that instead of the five meats appetizer...
@leahfinnegan @JPaskin @frannysbk @dpwenger ulgh this means that instead of the five meats appetizer I'll have to order 4. 85 meats.
Do you actually NEED the JVM? Because LISP has an amazing...
@harrisj @thejefflarson @A_L Do you actually NEED the JVM? Because LISP has an amazing community on Usenet.
this is part of the thinking you need to do in order to be...
@thejefflarson @harrisj @A_L this is part of the thinking you need to do in order to be great at your job!
ted we gotta bring that down a notch
you just have this sudden sense of what it's like to do a...
@thejefflarson @A_L you just have this sudden sense of what it's like to do a Ph. D.
i like when he reacts to specification by example here...
@thejefflarson @A_L i like when he reacts to specification by example here https://youtu. be/-4Yp3j_jk8Q?
i think that's transcended scarfhood to become an...
sometimes a whole new universe just appears where I have no...
My first thought was Natalie Merchant, but Lenny Kravitz...
My first thought was Natalie Merchant, but Lenny Kravitz maybe too.
YES also I was thinking Dean Martin
any sweater
whoa
leslie lamport makes a really good case for it here:...
@thejefflarson @A_L leslie lamport makes a really good case for it here: https://www. youtube.
Which celebrity, living or dead, do you think owned or owns...
Which celebrity, living or dead, do you think owned or owns the most sweaters?
this is my true face
don't get me started on xkcd comics
omg short-cut white haired white lady in light slacks...
i'm gonna go read more Tanenbaum and you go ahead and...
nerds calm down i know programming a vehicle bus is hard...
we are all so dead
Lee at the rate I move, even Fast Company seems painfully...
@Lee_Ars Lee at the rate I move, even Fast Company seems painfully slow.
oh well that logic is impeccable
like i would just assume that the cost-benefit at Toyota,...
right but the actual risk to human life from bad car code...
hahahah
“what would a formally verified blog engine look like?”—me,...
“what would a formally verified blog engine look like?
Who could know he was talking about TYPE SAFETY?...
Who could know he was talking about TYPE SAFETY? https://twitter.
i'm sitting here like an ass using immutable data...
i just assumed it was all formally-verified Ada done to the...
after 20 years of being told that web programmers aren't...
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/671392207027441664/photo/1
@patbits https://twitter.
are you at jury duty
framing this tweet
Kieran your entire workflow is emacs, pandoc, and R, what...
@FreeBSDHelp @kjhealy Kieran your entire workflow is emacs, pandoc, and R, what are you worried about?
finn we are going to call you for advice
to feel the reassuring grip of IDE cables as the pins enter...
@finn to feel the reassuring grip of IDE cables as the pins enter their sockets?
come on finn don't you ever want to feel young again?
@finn come on finn don't you ever want to feel young again?
I made wireless work on my SUSE laptop in 2000 so I'll...
@kjhealy I made wireless work on my SUSE laptop in 2000 so I'll never cast stones.
I expected it would make me feel guilty but its all good.
I expected it would make me feel guilty but its all good.
I just logged into http://tilde.club after many months away...
I just logged into http://tilde. club after many months away and there are maybe 100 people idly connected through mosh.
Just using Finder is like having another toddler that won't...
Just using Finder is like having another toddler that won't do anything you want it to.
Having twins made this person switch from MacOS to FreeBSD...
Having twins made this person switch from MacOS to FreeBSD and I completely understand where he is coming from. http://mirrorshades.
When you look at some statistics it's obvious there's a...
@kjhealy @harrisj When you look at some statistics it's obvious there's a problem. Why can't people acknowledge that?
I'm not sure, but the media should be ashamed of itself.
@harrisj @kjhealy I'm not sure, but the media should be ashamed of itself.
I'm afraid so.
@kjhealy I'm afraid so.
wow that is a vicious burn
this is sort of crazy; an ORM-style mapping of...
this is sort of crazy; an ORM-style mapping of JS<->RDF https://github.
that's what twitter looks like to me
if they would fix the bread so it wasn't extruded I'd be...
Arby's has sliders.
Arby's has sliders.
it's a good story
what could you even have done?
@tolar @freddurst what could you even have done?
Oh god its toy dog division time this is heaven.
Oh god its toy dog division time this is heaven.
noted!
@egculbertson noted!
My daughter just told us that the hotel blankey is too...
My daughter just told us that the hotel blankey is too scrumbly.
The crying just started up in these Pack N Plays.
The crying just started up in these Pack N Plays.
Tomorrow we drive home and I guess I'll give another...
Tomorrow we drive home and I guess I'll give another donation to PP. We had salami and provolone on crackers for dinner.
Here's the fire we saw on 81. https://twitter.com/ftrain/sta...
Here's the fire we saw on 81. https://twitter.
I'm in Berkeley Springs, West Virginia, in a Best Western...
I'm in Berkeley Springs, West Virginia, in a Best Western drinking Wild Turkey watching a dog show on TV with my family.
I am trying to imagine this club....
I am trying to imagine this club. https://twitter.
whoa score
it would have been awesome if there were ads for James Bond...
he would do well at that quiz
Well, newspapers did feature a lot of voices and there were...
@jensimmons Well, newspapers did feature a lot of voices and there were TONS of them. So probably...
“adele quiz available”
yes
the adele secondary content market has started to overheat...
the adele secondary content market has started to overheat https://twitter.
oh also email, facebook, and my god the VINES, plus youtube...
@jcn oh also email, facebook, and my god the VINES, plus youtube videos, and http://archive.
i bet it could easily be 30,000 discrete units of people...
not to mention all the other corners, reporters and...
i mean you must see like 20 people a day on twitter new to...
@jcn i mean you must see like 20 people a day on twitter new to you right?
oh the modern ones are more bureaucratic but the old ones...
How many individual voices do you think you read or heard...
How many individual voices do you think you read or heard this year on the Internet? I'd say for me it's something like 10,000-20,000.
they're so good
Also for the people who help us with our kids and home and...
Also for the people who help us with our kids and home and mental health: Margaret, Tasha, PDLA, Kaleidoscope, various LCSWs.
I'm thankful for nerds who instruct me, $5 computers,...
I'm thankful for nerds who instruct me, $5 computers, feminists pissed off and not, RFCs, my coworkers, my family, prose, and Ditmas.
it's really great when @doree reports and does big profiles...
it's really great when @doree reports and does big profiles http://www. buzzfeed.
tonight or in general
oh man he thought there's a 🦃 emoji and if i put that...
i do a lot of high-pitched shrieking
We got through stars-to-hearts pretty well, and I know that...
We got through stars-to-hearts pretty well, and I know that we can handle hearts-to-tiny-turkeys tomorrow.
don't let her service journalism fool you, katie is a trash...
pitas stood for "pain is truth, Andrew, sir"
yeah i sort of need a little color on this one
omg the thankfulness keynote presentation would be amazing
it's a high-stakes game, pranks are SO not welcome
If you want a truly memorable Thanksgiving just break the...
If you want a truly memorable Thanksgiving just break the locks on all the bathrooms in the house.
Tomorrow, when you're going around the table, just quietly...
Tomorrow, when you're going around the table, just quietly say, “I'm thankful for some of my family,” and see if anyone notices.
i mean the key thing is just to have a more transparent...
@tylerpietz i mean the key thing is just to have a more transparent hiring process? it starts there.
i wish missy elliott would write songs about open source...
i'm in the little white-doored office in the corner
this is amazing
come on, you know bitcoin is fucking disgusting
Peter Gabriel is good too he doesn't sing like he's got a...
Peter Gabriel is good too he doesn't sing like he's got a whole ham stuffed in his mouth and seems to realize other people are on stage.
omg dudes stop stop stop just let tracy chapman do this...
omg dudes stop stop stop just let tracy chapman do this https://www. youtube.
I think I just found the most painful cool-dad moment in...
I think I just found the most painful cool-dad moment in all of musical history https://open. spotify.
https://youtu.be/rMDTXUO3dYE
https://youtu.
matt i'm coming to your house to punch your face
i'm🏆cool🏆with🏆millennials
I seriously thought it had been about three years.
@PJVogt @AGoldmund I seriously thought it had been about three years.
I highlighted this too, just so I could kind of hang with...
I highlighted this too, just so I could kind of hang with my friends. https://medium.
IT'S A WONDERFUL ADVENTURE
they'll need to prove their economic value like anyone else
good point but the law's the law
The good news is everyone can get abortions. The bad news...
@leahfinnegan The good news is everyone can get abortions. The bad news is the clinic is on Mars.
i mean i suck at golf so this is basically it
i did cut the paragraph where i explained capitalism but it...
@phyllisstein i did cut the paragraph where i explained capitalism but it was redundant.
i'm using all the platforms leah
I program in Dylan.
@mathowie @messick I program in Dylan.
i meant basement; see attached https://twitter.com/ftrain/st...
@DaveHallmon @abexlumberg @Gimletmedia @Medium i meant basement; see attached https://twitter.
put aside any six hours in the next six months and we'll do...
being from the future is exhausting tbh
i have been listening to her on repeat since 2013 ...
@maureenflaherty @anildash @ginatrapani i have been listening to her on repeat since 2013 https://twitter.
One way to fight ISIS is by canceling their subscription to...
One way to fight ISIS is by canceling their subscription to Adobe Creative Cloud.
fair
This is a pile of treats that feels like it was made just...
This is a pile of treats that feels like it was made just for me, but it's great to read @worrydream on climate http://worrydream.
I'll DM you our rates.
@thanland I'll DM you our rates.
this viral video has an amazing twist at the end...
this viral video has an amazing twist at the end https://www. youtube.
it's in the book
ian is this native advertising
Hi! Now that I co-run @PostlightAgency I'm trying to blog...
Hi! Now that I co-run @PostlightAgency I'm trying to blog entrepreneurially, so I wrote about POWERPOINT TIPS @ftrain /helpful-talk-tips-5347ea7c2745" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.
that's pretty good and feels roughly complete!
@redkeg that's pretty good and feels roughly complete!
probably for the best
this is embarrassing but I wanted to find all the podcasts...
oh he's busy
wait is there no way to search through podcasts? not even...
wait is there no way to search through podcasts? not even the contents, just the titles and descriptions?
slow nod
oh god it really is isn't it
Not a subtweet just what I was thinking at the gym today.
Not a subtweet just what I was thinking at the gym today.
First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then you...
First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then you savagely turn on your peers in order to show relevance.
DIFFERENT CONSENT JESUS
Qui Tacit Consentire
wait til you're 40
I would drink french vanilla from a keurig
coffee is hot water strained through bullshit
until you hit the Pacific Northwest then buckle in
It's cool they serve coffee though coffee in NYC is either...
It's cool they serve coffee though coffee in NYC is either unbearably precious or wonderful hot garbage.
The fact that 7-11 sells pizza in NYC is so messed up.
The fact that 7-11 sells pizza in NYC is so messed up.
I'm so looking forward to this.
@worrydream I'm so looking forward to this.
“What the hell were you doing so long in the...
“What the hell were you doing so long in the bathroom? Four year old: “Jokes!
not my bot
Alex, sleep when the baby sleeps.
@AGoldmund Alex, sleep when the baby sleeps.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=109xEXkCW7c@patbits
@patbits @patbits " target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://www. youtube.
for kids, atrocious. for parents, wonderful because beard...
@hellokaitlin for kids, atrocious.
high school kids are universally terrible but then again...
you can't fight this feeling/deep inside of you
Mary Beard's SPQR is patient and thorough and really good...
Mary Beard's SPQR is patient and thorough and really good so far. This has been Mary Beard's SPQR review digest.
hi
I bet Matt and Alex wish they could do that when they wake...
PJ would Gimlet be wildly profitable if you didn't play...
oh god it looks sooooo fun
David no
I can't decide how fucked this is. Do you play in the...
@PJVogt I can't decide how fucked this is. Do you play in the bathroom at work?
but go be clear that page appears to have been written by a...
you will never understand
http://tstoaddicts.com/2014/09/07/turbo-tappin-level-44-data...
@PJVogt http://tstoaddicts. com/2014/09/07/turbo-tappin-level-44-database/ I think it actually predates what is code?
PJ can you do a YYN about this tweet
yeah that game is tops
Jesus Casey I bet you hate rainbow sprinkles too
I love my technology news gently leavened with wordplay
unicorpse was a great neologism!
@rustyk5 @caseyjohnston @MikeIsaac unicorpse was a great neologism!
it was so painstaking and all for these 200k games it is...
Helpful Talk Tips!
Right now I give a lot of short speeches and presentations, meaning that I stand in front of an audience with a clicker in hand and speak to slides. I ...
Helpful talk tips!
Helpful talk tips! I’ve been giving many talks, so I decided to write down some of what I’ve been learning here on the Official Postlight Corporate Blog.
according to that commercial people cried at their desks...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jRiNuB_Y1qY
@elizabethminkel https://www. youtube.
is blogging journalism
and there's something sort of quaint about it, “as i...
yah it's super good to be of service
like so often they are teaching in vermont or something and...
i sort of feel for the writer in that case though because...
You know what's hanging out there waiting? Anathem.
@gravitytrope You know what's hanging out there waiting? Anathem.
STRONG!
@LorenDavie STRONG!
not wrong, NEVER wrong, just thinking about 20-year...
I wonder if it's time for Neuromancer?
@GrahamStarr I wonder if it's time for Neuromancer?
You have to choose though. You do medieval and space and...
You have to choose though. You do medieval and space and dystopia and you get Jupiter Rising.
I know, the line was out the door!
@bn2b I know, the line was out the door!
alluniversesmatter
i feel that the stakes on alternate universe things are too...
It will be either medieval, space, or dystopia, or a world...
It will be either medieval, space, or dystopia, or a world much like our own.
I wonder what the next huge tentpole franchise will be. We...
I wonder what the next huge tentpole franchise will be. We know it'll involve 1..
the thing is luxury brand expansion into artisanal foods...
i woke up so tired
I don't like takes in my dreams.
I don't like takes in my dreams.
It was literally “oh, Gucci makes coffee?” followed by a...
It was literally “oh, Gucci makes coffee? ” followed by a stream of avatars with links to articles about why Gucci shouldn't make coffee.
In my dream Gucci opened a coffee chain, then the dream...
In my dream Gucci opened a coffee chain, then the dream shifted to Twitter links to takes on Gucci Coffee. The cups were faux leather.
for years, but lately I'm faltering
Jesus Pac Man give it a rest. https://twitter.com/ftrain/sta...
Jesus Pac Man give it a rest. https://twitter.
god i wish someone had told me
Hmm. At first when I read this, I was like, “yeah!”
Hmm. At first when I read this, I was like, “yeah!
amazed that “Cyberbalkanization” didn't catch on
I love failed neologisms https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Splin...
I love failed neologisms https://en. wikipedia.
I got a job at a dot com fuck you boss
what language is that jim also all_songs needs to be a lazy...
yeah joel i mean you don't even PRETEND
i guess you are lucky
the edge is where i live
pinning this
to be honest i still have no idea what code is
Des Ark is so great https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/650008...
Des Ark is so great https://twitter.
coupla drinks, headed home
3d printing of keyboards http://adereth.github.io/blog/2015/...
3d printing of keyboards http://adereth. github.
you knew what this was dave
I can tell I'm in a very fancy Chinese restaurant because I...
I can tell I'm in a very fancy Chinese restaurant because I just ordered Specific Tso's Chicken.
tbh things are usually okay
oh yeah the Internet has treated me as a free service for...
perl6
yep!
@Emdashes yep!
hmm someone should build this it probably would only take a...
25 at random or 25 selected or the 25 most engaged over a...
for digital brands that need inspiration, Paul Ford is the...
ulgh a thousand euros
ben you knew what this was when you hit follow
where can I get a Putin bust
Do it as an FAQ. List the questions, then answer them.
@skamille Do it as an FAQ. List the questions, then answer them.
when i hear unix nerds talk about chroot i think...
when i hear unix nerds talk about chroot i think https://twitter.
basically anything sugary and fried
we have wood floors so skitterskitter skitter skitter...
he's a good boy
sugared pork basically
iknowiknowiknowiknowiknowiknowiknowiknowiknowiknowiknowiknow...
i hate myself https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/667377681537...
i hate myself https://twitter.
this is so great
whoa logical song
gerry rafferty and tpau own me today
all work has stopped in america
thank you kindly
it's not 100% clear from the interface but ...
it's not 100% clear from the interface but http://imacomputa.
this is good
https://youtu.be/frrGrAAUKZY?t=3m23s
https://youtu. be/frrGrAAUKZY?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KGynMCzC6Dk
https://www. youtube.
I pay $400 a year for JSTOR and the ACM.
@theodoreross @elizabethminkel @CharoShane I pay $400 a year for JSTOR and the ACM.
that word is...dumb
@sally_j @uhmhaleigh that word is...
who will be the nine https://twitter.com/The_O_C_R/status/66...
who will be the nine https://twitter.
i'm wesley willis
i feel so bad about everything
i'm going to watch that three or four times
that video came from @uhmhaleigh and is a great video
whoa it turns out that other profile subjects have had...
whoa it turns out that other profile subjects have had serious doubts about nancy jo sales's reporting http://www. dailymotion.
oh my sweet god oh my god this videomygod
wait is it really "sapiosexuality"?
@uhmhaleigh @sally_j wait is it really "sapiosexuality"?
It is now my duty to destroy him.
@karenmcgrane @frank_chimero It is now my duty to destroy him.
This is something that “went well.”
This is something that “went well.
He cast aspersions onto the moral character of a critical...
He cast aspersions onto the moral character of a critical journalist, said that he likes ugly women, and failed to use words good.
He will be worth $300 million.
He will be worth $300 million.
This is with a PR person sitting right there.
This is with a PR person sitting right there.
Burn it all down http://www.standard.co.uk/lifestyle/london-...
Burn it all down http://www. standard.
there are NONE it's kind of crazy much of it is going into...
@benrwms there are NONE it's kind of crazy much of it is going into my book though?
CMS rule of thumb: The number of people working on a CMS is...
CMS rule of thumb: The number of people working on a CMS is equivalent to the number of minutes it takes for the home page to cache.
Everything that depresses you about design thinking and...
Everything that depresses you about design thinking and Silicon Valley goofballness, @garychou is an antidote https://twitter.
fair question
NakedEyes is a good name for a promise framework IMO.
@rustyk5 @djacobs @jennschiffer NakedEyes is a good name for a promise framework IMO.
yes now i feel bad, people should do their work
also my guess is that she HAS released a javascript...
you've probably released a javascript framework but i'm too...
if you released a javascript framework it would be called...
tfw the publisher doesn't use your blurb
i hate u
right fair we use meetup to track people and that's the...
wait there are tickets?
@The_O_C_R wait there are tickets?
I am worried she'll get cold
oh totally, the crispy plastic edges that crumble when you...
@jennschiffer oh totally, the crispy plastic edges that crumble when you chew, the exciting poke of the tack on your lower tongue.
broads are the best
if you remember that rubber geese video i sounded like that...
my website is old that i would never presume a lady is...
i mean it depends if you were reading ftrain in 2000-2002...
we had like 20k pixels to work with per year it was a very...
@jacqui @jennschiffer we had like 20k pixels to work with per year it was a very different time https://twitter.
i made this for the internet when i was 28...
@jacqui @jennschiffer i made this for the internet when i was 28 https://twitter.
it's important to emphasize safety
to be clear we're talking the little binder clips here not...
i'm 41 and I can do 12 binder clips in my mouth
I mean there should be a government API that gives all...
@wrongwaygoback I mean there should be a government API that gives all women the ability to securely find reproductive health care?
be strong
SLOWLY RESCINDS INVITATION
tweet-666443850853056513
ulgh dan what is this
lol
try to get through tomorrow without saying “brand”
that's great. i updated the type a little and fixed some...
@Glench that's great. i updated the type a little and fixed some obvious issues, so it might be worth merging.
oh wow that is new to me that is amazing
FUN!
@jennschiffer FUN!
every time they say mastermind i think...
every time they say mastermind i think https://twitter.
thank you joel
hello recruiter is radiohead's worst album
jack look away i don't want you to see this
yah it's just a couple lines of silliness here...
@airbagmoments yah it's just a couple lines of silliness here https://github.
The source is here: https://github.com/ftrain/gov20
The source is here: https://github.
:double_middle_finger_extended_one_finger_brown_the_other_fi...
i made a bot for this a while ago after a separate conv...
@anildash @jennschiffer i made a bot for this a while ago after a separate conv with anil http://ftrain. github.
yeah abortions are nowhere near as well-funded as snapchat
i totally forgot i built this dumb bot that combines an...
i totally forgot i built this dumb bot that combines an internet term with a progressive term http://ftrain. github.
yeah being severely late with one book is enough for...
like, making it no big deal is really helpful
you know i've gotten some feedback from people that...
@mattwaite you know i've gotten some feedback from people that building a website on http://tilde.
what did they learn?
@mattwaite what did they learn?
i erased my last tweet because the ironic voice wasn't...
this is the other greatest gif in history
wow anil that is the nerdiest imaginable way to say smash...
yes 100%
giphy nuclear
This is so wonderful.
This is so wonderful.
niiiiiiice
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/666304609460183040/photo/1
https://twitter.
smdh
i'm good with any gif where something small happens and is...
i'm good with any gif where something small happens and is followed by a nuclear explosion https://twitter.
workin on it
yes
me too! this one was hands-full
@sccarmichael me too!
mindwalker
this actually doesn't sound fun at all
and you have to be there for that. you can't just be...
@Goldman44 and you have to be there for that. you can't just be blessed and not grateful.
These are the things no one tells you in your 20s.
These are the things no one tells you in your 20s.
Sneezing with headphones on mass transit is awkward because...
Sneezing with headphones on mass transit is awkward because what if someone blesses me and I don't hear? So I do a kind of thankful “ahm.
oh kevin
Everyone is so focused on their own narrative that they...
Everyone is so focused on their own narrative that they forget to consider all the wonderful things that jet fuel *does* melt.
been there
true facts!
@leahfinnegan true facts!
turn around and go home
in the 70s my great aunt buried $20k in a chicken at...
regular
soft pretzel
I am LOVING this archive. What a wonderful resource.
@awbjs @anildash I am LOVING this archive. What a wonderful resource.
i can only imagine!
@awbjs @anildash i can only imagine!
it is! it's just a reminder of what the real low-level work...
@djacobs @anildash it is! it's just a reminder of what the real low-level work is like in a world of six JS frameworks per month.
What I love is, “spend a year implementing this 6K of...
@anildash What I love is, “spend a year implementing this 6K of documented code.
nothing changes, but they had a much better excuse
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/665958302417686531/photo/1
https://twitter.
From http://www.wirfs-brock.com/allen/things/smalltalk-thing...
From http://www. wirfs-brock.
Software history nerds only—a 1980 letter from Xerox to...
Software history nerds only—a 1980 letter from Xerox to Tektronix offering Smalltalk http://www. wirfs-brock.
Oh, interesting. The global media coverage generates huge...
@spacierarcher Oh, interesting. The global media coverage generates huge FB traffic which generated a product decision.
Beirut didn't get Facebook's Safety Check like Paris did...
Beirut didn't get Facebook's Safety Check like Paris did http://www. nytimes.
i was looking at the API, I think it might be possible to...
i could never surpass the original
typical slideshare slide https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/6...
typical slideshare slide https://twitter.
what in the world even
the one where he calls radio shack to ask for goggle by...
you changed my life
spotify is also strong for prank calls btw, has many of the...
holy shit
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wRRsXxE1KVY
@AGoldmund https://www. youtube.
it's for the typo
you're sad wrong
some of these puns are evergreens
I just looked back at this conversation and we should burn...
they should pitch sequoia
I bet this program will encourage some young trees to...
the trees can administrate their own severs because they...
fair
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/665306643786153984/photo/1
https://twitter.
smh https://twitter.com/caseyjohnston/status/651739487475757...
@anildash @caseyjohnston smh https://twitter.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Typhoon_Gay_(1992)
@caseyjohnston https://en. wikipedia.
it was our joke patrick
do u play fantasy skorts
stop trying to make you happen
your now girlfriend is way cooler
embedded video is weird
i think maybe the words "hackathon" and anything related to...
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/665197865988308992/video/1
@patbits https://twitter.
menstrual hack day http://www.buzzfeed.com/katienotopoulos/a...
menstrual hack day http://www. buzzfeed.
javascript can do anything now
goodbye morning tabs. see you next week, late afternoon...
goodbye morning tabs. see you next week, late afternoon tabs.
ulgh they have so much fun and so little shame in California
it was an honest mistake and I pledge to help in the...
I'm just imagining the moment, you just got back from a...
I'm just imagining the moment, you just got back from a three day offsite with the InBev team, and your scarecrow costume is on your chair.
Twitter's threading isn't working so I can't tell if this...
you are costume director
If @postlightagency gets huge I'm making the executive...
If @postlightagency gets huge I'm making the executive staff dress up like the cast of Hellraiser.
maybe shonda rhimes should run yahoo
Via @patbits
Marissa Mayer made Yahoo's executive team dress up as...
Marissa Mayer made Yahoo's executive team dress up as characters from the Wizard of Oz. http://recode.
its perfect in that photo
have you seen that video lately it's majestic
choire has a slight tendency to say "come come my lady" in...
maybe I locked down notifications too hard
I'm on Android Twitter it doesn't tell me shit.
@bn2b I'm on Android Twitter it doesn't tell me shit.
that should be enough for anybody
It would be pretty crazy if Twitter notified you about your...
butterfly is the best song on the album
umm klimt smh
“infinitely non-monolithic” is a beautiful formulation that...
Shooter Jennings (Waylon's son) did a GREAT “You Are My...
Shooter Jennings (Waylon's son) did a GREAT “You Are My Sunshine” https://open. spotify.
I like that because those could branch in so many ways
I've definitely scrubbed extra hard during bath time...
that is my default dns but I had the exact same range of...
this is how we live now
we have octoalerts printed out around the house
What is a better term than “recruiting pipeline”? People...
What is a better term than “recruiting pipeline”? People probably shouldn't be in pipelines.
octonauts is a military installation that teaches children...
We are late for school. “Then where is the pee?” I ask. My...
We are late for school. “Then where is the pee?
“Octonauts is a privilege, not a right,” is something I...
“Octonauts is a privilege, not a right,” is something I just said in a commanding tone to twin four-year-olds.
yep that's perfect
guys i know there are other events that honor bad ideas,...
guys i know there are other events that honor bad ideas, but bad ideas are WORTHLESS. it's shitty implementations that change the world.
to be fair it only captures spotify track links
it's just that one song
no
i know me too
literally every major brand
i was thinking more like https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kvd...
@jlax i was thinking more like https://www. youtube.
this was some time ago
oh yeah i tried to use a netbook at a yahoo hack day, it...
i'm sure it will happen organically
honestly though inside of each of us there's a little...
it's a micro VGA port coming out of a Slackware laptop? it...
@fredbenenson @waxpancake it's a micro VGA port coming out of a Slackware laptop? it worked at drupalcon?
at the bad ideas festival i'll bring together leaders in...
oh no http://chandlerproject.org/
@anildash @McAndrew @mattcutts oh no http://chandlerproject.
DO I
at the bad ideas festival, how much should we charge people...
at the bad ideas festival, how much should we charge people to participate in the hack day?
maybe betaworks should fund a new email client for macintosh
god yes
honestly @PostlightAgency has room for 100, the wi-fi, the...
oh cool another project i never finished
i mean it's "quota units" but still and then twitter is...
anil do you know how many API requests you can make against...
@anildash @mattcutts anil do you know how many API requests you can make against the Gmail API daily?
ulgh matt i'm programming against the twitter search api...
a lot of what i found when i searched was kind...
@MikeIsaac a lot of what i found when i searched was kind of...
oh no it's fine
oh wait it doesn't capture url-shortened links you do have...
@MikeIsaac oh wait it doesn't capture url-shortened links you do have something https://twitter. com/search?
it just screen-scrapes twitter's search for spotify links...
it just screen-scrapes twitter's search for spotify links you can see what's up in a search like this: https://twitter. com/search?
it only works if you post spotify links no dice...
@MikeIsaac it only works if you post spotify links no dice https://twitter. com/search?
i think that is the literal engineering process at square
literally just spotify links, nothing complex
bad ideas festival workshop: better javascript through...
god you SHOULD keynote
you two were the strongest of my sample set
it only works with spotify i don't think you've posted...
@AGoldmund @PJVogt it only works with spotify i don't think you've posted individual tracks? https://twitter.
at the bad ideas festival everyone will be able to use...
i wrote a script that extracts playlists from people's...
i wrote a script that extracts playlists from people's twitter accounts, here's @PJVogt 's https://open. spotify.
i hacked a script to get spotify playlists from twitter...
i hacked a script to get spotify playlists from twitter accounts here's @anildash https://open. spotify.
the internet in my brain is pretty accurate
goes to show you there are no original bad ideas...
goes to show you there are no original bad ideas https://twitter.
webring always
oh don't worry you'll be hosting our diversity seminar at...
GREAT bad idea
guys don't worry the bad ideas festival will be 100% panels
go ahead everyone question the pricing at my registrar of...
i just bought http://badideasfestival.com which, spending...
i just bought http://badideasfestival. com which, spending $15 on that is a self-fulfilling prophecy kind of.
getting you to sponsor is probably a really bad, ah, fuck...
i wonder if people are less excited about personal finance...
“yes you can do accents” would be a good presentation at...
"we need someone to...end this"
@tcarmody @lauraolin "we need someone to...
oh that would have been great
it was so neat and felt so productive and then it just...
remember how mint made it seem like you could just kind of...
panel: five writers show you their mint accounts
honestly it would just be the same as the good ideas...
besides sxsw
someone should throw a bad ideas festival
”why do we throw meat at our parents“ panel discussion at...
it's really just a person throwing processed meat on...
it's really just a person throwing processed meat on another person https://twitter.
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/537941332376158208
@redkeg https://twitter.
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/664593098048208896/photo/1
https://twitter.
time won't pass itself
Hitler's baby shoes, never worn.
Hitler's baby shoes, never worn.
but the cure is worse than the disease
I know
When friends from the EU throw kids’ birthday parties, the...
When friends from the EU throw kids’ birthday parties, the first thing they tell you when you get there is that they are serving cookies.
gigacolon is worse
this feeling is familiar to me
Here is an argument over whether it's correct or not to say...
Here is an argument over whether it's correct or not to say that LISP is a language where “everything is a list. ” https://news.
cool have fun at Davos
And a patriot.
@jeb @yacomink @finn And a patriot.
I am late to review this but Finn is correct.
@jeb @yacomink @finn I am late to review this but Finn is correct.
“remember your training, Ford” (anthologizes tiny factoids...
i like change
Meanwhile Facebook identifies which asteroids are likely...
Meanwhile Facebook identifies which asteroids are likely inhabitable.
Hug your children 6% harder tonight everybody.
Hug your children 6% harder tonight everybody.
no exactly whenever they do that I just get so incredibly...
oh RIGHT
when the GOP can make a good web anything the Internet is...
listen guys GOP infographics and meme appropriation are...
We were all wrong also the world is doomed...
We were all wrong also the world is doomed http://techcrunch.
lolol
no it was at the new school
I talked about a thing and had some drinks, everyone was...
I talked about a thing and had some drinks, everyone was chill.
yes http://postlight.recruiterbox.com
@stevekinney @jennschiffer yes http://postlight. recruiterbox.
Hi Sue!
@sueapfe Hi Sue!
that looks like you are headed somewhere great!
@harper @tolar that looks like you are headed somewhere great!
I love that place!
@tolar I love that place!
a large modernist theater so yes
kapie I don't have a personality
I am eavesdropping. The hot gossip is that people are...
I am eavesdropping. The hot gossip is that people are looking for opportunities and some people have opportunities to share but it's uneven.
I should be networking.
I should be networking.
My headshot is on a screen and no longer accurate, which...
My headshot is on a screen and no longer accurate, which makes it a headshat.
Here is a photo of the place I am....
Here is a photo of the place I am. https://twitter.
TBD
It is called Design Driven and sponsored by @firstmarkcap...
It is called Design Driven and sponsored by @firstmarkcap and held at the New School and everyone is very nice so far.
I know I should be more specific.
I know I should be more specific.
I am at this thing where I will talk about stuff.
I am at this thing where I will talk about stuff.
because then it's froblematic
the question is, is fantitlement a form of frivelege?
@elizabethminkel the question is, is fantitlement a form of frivelege?
This is a very interesting help-wanted ad if you like web...
This is a very interesting help-wanted ad if you like web things and stacks https://twitter.
write more about fantitlement
thank you michael
your tilde site was so good and i loved it
beard hacker
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/664158366479032320/photo/1
@billmatic @mslopatto https://twitter.
proud of u 4 coding
if we wing it hard enough WE CAN FLY
and bad writing
also how is “bottling” a thing? is the UK really much of a...
also how is “bottling” a thing? is the UK really much of a mess?
so @garychou is our first speaker and we're like “gary we...
come by @postlightagency next Tuesday and hear @garychou...
come by @postlightagency next Tuesday and hear @garychou talk about the good work he's doing at @orbitalnyc http://www. meetup.
fan fiction mega-site
also he was on some game show but more importantly this was...
reddit is somehow not yet involved
a guy wrote something on wattpad and a woman criticized it...
a guy wrote something on wattpad and a woman criticized it so he traveled 500 miles to hit her with a bottle http://www. dailymail.
“Over 1,000 bought”
cool you're adopted
its too covered with trophies and bills anyway
good tweet kid here's your 🏆
culturally straddle
choire is straddle AND Scorpio its a powerful combination
The idea of a “generation” is just more baby-boomer...
The idea of a “generation” is just more baby-boomer bullshit.
this is cool as hell. thanks for the kind words too.
@circleci @tvachon this is cool as hell. thanks for the kind words too.
speakers gonna speak http://www.meetup.com/Postlight/events/...
speakers gonna speak http://www. meetup.
testing
bought my wedding suit at Attire Fire (where the deals...
OOF
I pretty much only shop at Pants Bucket.
@JPaskin I pretty much only shop at Pants Bucket.
waaaaaaaaarghhhhh!
@paul_haine waaaaaaaaarghhhhh!
I was just thinking of an American remake of Totoro, it...
I was just thinking of an American remake of Totoro, it would just be Totoro fleeing enraged hunters while Catbus is dismantled for Catuber.
and when you are all done you package it all into a...
@harrisj and when you are all done you package it all into a jar...
whoa
I erased that tweet I realized that Sunday night is no time...
@tcarmody I erased that tweet I realized that Sunday night is no time for economics Twitter.
The Internet saved American jobs. It saved them for robots.
The Internet saved American jobs. It saved them for robots.
It's a very regressive outrage. I mean one of the things...
@baconmeteor @tqbf It's a very regressive outrage. I mean one of the things startups do is turn everyone into contractors.
this is an 8-year-plus bugbear for him, unions bug the shit...
@baconmeteor this is an 8-year-plus bugbear for him, unions bug the shit out of the guy http://www. paulgraham.
I want to host a meetup I love it so.
@harrisj I want to host a meetup I love it so.
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/569571766475087872
https://twitter.
Any industry that still has employees has potential energy...
Any industry that still has employees has potential energy that could be released by startups.
Knausgård is the best blogger alive.
Knausgård is the best blogger alive.
don't quit! you're almost there!
@harrisj don't quit! you're almost there!
See, it works for everyone!
@theRightSteph See, it works for everyone!
Twitter should give real celebrities red checkmarks so that...
Twitter should give real celebrities red checkmarks so that you don't keep getting your hopes up about media people.
This video is EXACTLY what the New Testament is about,...
This video is EXACTLY what the New Testament is about, bringing a gun to a corporate coffee chain https://www. facebook.
If Twitter made a car it would have 50 horns but no wheels.
If Twitter made a car it would have 50 horns but no wheels.
Why is no one talking about the Facebook car?
Why is no one talking about the Facebook car?
not that I know of although that is on my TOREAD
no i was in upstate New York, they were far away, I bought...
do you now
30 years of Negativland on http://archive.org...
30 years of Negativland on http://archive. org https://archive.
legos for education 800 piece + lego small house bases
you can buy a DVD player for $18 new but a pile of plastic...
i just gave up and ordered legos
wait have you seen computer chess this is the exact plot
if his mom's alive
kapie is a fucking toilet person but hoooooooly shit this...
i missed this tweet when i unfollowed
every day i pray for your podcast
i was here before you and i'll be here when you're dead
then you probably gave her a real PISS-STASH-IO
did you drain them into a PEE CAN?
@katienotopoulos did you drain them into a PEE CAN?
PERFECT PROGRAMMING METAPHOR https://twitter.com/ftrain/stat...
PERFECT PROGRAMMING METAPHOR https://twitter.
HEY KIDS https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/66310708952344985...
HEY KIDS https://twitter.
these ecologically sound legos invoke all the fun of the...
these ecologically sound legos invoke all the fun of the film “dark city” http://colors-cc. net/products/ms-eb01#.
oh i'm pretending this never happened
the font
Well-known jewelry-seller offers Star Wars jewelry...
Well-known jewelry-seller offers Star Wars jewelry because... ♫Every Sith begins with Kay♫ http://www.
oh no i'm doubling down on this
Every Sith begins with Kay.
@redkeg Every Sith begins with Kay.
just went down the rabbit hole of alternative generic...
oh no
Here is the sexing ribbon http://www.quirkspace.com/booniver...
Here is the sexing ribbon http://www. quirkspace.
I'm now fascinated by hacker ribbons...
I'm now fascinated by hacker ribbons http://esr. ibiblio.
and you can't spell TED without the D
When an American says, “There is no ‘I’ in ‘team’,“ does a...
When an American says, “There is no ‘I’ in ‘team’,“ does a UK person think “but there is ‘tea’”? This was hard to punctuate on a phone.
holy shit dave
60% of college students believe in true love and that...
I just found myself wishing townies would sneak in and...
which is kind of fair to believe in at Yale
college students don't know its risk-free though, it's life...
the article neglects to mention that they were in a vending...
Where does an astronaut lock away her emotions? In a space...
Where does an astronaut lock away her emotions? In a space safe.
use out-of-box everything, get good at the #+OPTIONS lines...
wikipedia timeline of members of the la's...
wikipedia timeline of members of the la's https://twitter.
lol this is a very good point
and tomato plants
oh man and on roosevelt island with like, a quick pan to...
don't forget they burned down a shed
oh man who gets murdered
how is this not yet a movie @leahfinnegan
o m f g this is a gift thank you
“She is described on the site as ‘a bitter woman who is...
“She is described on the site as ‘a bitter woman who is angry that she has achieved nothing in life.
“Mr. Ovsishcher successfully fought an eviction suit a few...
“Mr. Ovsishcher successfully fought an eviction suit a few years ago that was sparked by his need for an emotional support dog.
“If I call the president of the company a pirate, I don’t...
“If I call the president of the company a pirate, I don’t know if it’s slander.
NYC condo board president uses “drones to search for...
NYC condo board president uses “drones to search for unregistered air-conditioners in windows. ” http://www.
just apply! We are glad to hear from everyone and if its...
@mattgrommes just apply! We are glad to hear from everyone and if its not the right fit today we know what you can do for tomorrow.
wait do they make an evernote for adults?
@jamiekeiles @caseyjohnston @_grendan @jwherrman @dannosowitz @lindseyweber @Choire wait do they make an evernote for adults?
it's not not you
:)
and yes I've linked to this before but a bean like that you...
i needed a convenient proxy factory bean superclass for...
i needed a convenient proxy factory bean superclass for proxy factory beans that create only singletons and then— http://docs. spring.
maybe we should take down the Patrick Nagel prints?
@Maggie maybe we should take down the Patrick Nagel prints?
“Building a modern decentralized development team using...
@mik3cap @finn “Building a modern decentralized development team using cutting-edge Perl,” by Finn Smith, Master of Tools.
i swear to god finn if you don't stfu I will invite you to...
i'm ready!
@steve_mynott i'm ready!
This is one of the best examples I've ever seen of why it's...
This is one of the best examples I've ever seen of why it's so important to comment your source code http://www. bloomberg.
EXACTLY
I put in a SPOILER ALERT.
I put in a SPOILER ALERT.
My single greatest Internet accomplishment was creating the...
My single greatest Internet accomplishment was creating the Bartleby the Scrivener Wikipedia page in 2004. https://en.
fun fact I created the first Bartleby the Scrivener...
@drunkenbee fun fact I created the first Bartleby the Scrivener wikipedia page, of which i will be forever proud https://en. wikipedia.
Yes! Please send me an email to paul.ford@postlight.com and...
@SuMastodon Yes! Please send me an email to paul.
paul.ford@postlight.com
@_cynar paul. ford @postlight .
i have NO IDEA but you can totally send me an email about...
Right I should also include this link to our careers page:...
Right I should also include this link to our careers page: https://postlight. recruiterbox.
hi! https://postlight.recruiterbox.com
@edlynyuen hi! https://postlight.
she threw that party!
@patbits she threw that party!
that looks like texas
to be clear our first hire was a director of HR and she's...
i've been studying how to recruit a diverse team for...
i've been studying how to recruit a diverse team for @postlightagency and most of the strategies out there are like https://twitter.
Maybe they should rename OpenBSD to CassandraOS, because...
Maybe they should rename OpenBSD to CassandraOS, because they keep warning us and we never listen.
whatever it is, it's only $25 and it will make you happy,...
it's a fun world
and dudes like me to go “oh that's terrible” and then...
oh yeah MANY of the ladies who go to nerd conferences have...
i listened to it this morning and was all meh so you're...
don't look back in anger
oh jeez http://esr.ibiblio.org/?p=6907&cpage=1#comment-16508...
@D5AA96 oh jeez #comment -1650807" target="_blank" rel="noopener">http://esr. ibiblio.
being an asshole i mean tbh “what's the story morning...
god not me i think his art is great
That's the thing, he genuinely works at it, you can see him...
@tomscocca That's the thing, he genuinely works at it, you can see him really working up to some of the better bon mots.
I mean from his perspective this is basically a charitable...
@jackrusher I mean from his perspective this is basically a charitable assessment.
I just appreciate that his craft is being a complete and...
@tomscocca I just appreciate that his craft is being a complete and utter shithead whenever possible and he's been with it for DECADES.
right or a desk calendar
Noel Gallagher is a colossal dick and I think Oasis was...
Noel Gallagher is a colossal dick and I think Oasis was bullshit but this interview made me laugh out loud http://www. esquire.
lolol
no no i had the same set of confusions like an hour ago...
@jcsalterego no no i had the same set of confusions like an hour ago which is why i asked. it's communicated in a rather quiet way.
it works fine, it just returns zero results because i'm...
using their oauth tool to generate curl requests to "GET...
like, they *say* you have to pay for old tweets, i was just...
no no i'm like, doing it with curl and i'm authed and it's...
that is cool
honestly tonight they had dinner and we chatted, watched 20...
all i guess.
@Femme_Mal all i guess.
they look nice tho
wait really? it says seven days max and i'm only seeing...
@jcsalterego wait really? it says seven days max and i'm only seeing seven days max.
it's such an amazing thing
I can't get back past a week for some reason :(
Is there a way in the regular or streaming Twitter APIs to...
Is there a way in the regular or streaming Twitter APIs to do historical tweet search without paying for GNIP? Not complaining—making sure.
oh wow this has happened to me SO MANY TIMES
erase this
ad agency against spec work https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=...
ad agency against spec work https://www. youtube.
the design people at @business are spectacular and real...
I read up on it every week and lurk on IRC it looks like so...
@loltimo @joXn @dtm609 I read up on it every week and lurk on IRC it looks like so much fun.
I'm ready
art dept is killing it right now
god this is horrible
their way of gently telling you you're using it wrong
I can make that joke, I'm a co-founder.
I can make that joke, I'm a co-founder.
My phone just auto-corrected “co-founder” to “do-gooder,”...
My phone just auto-corrected “co-founder” to “do-gooder,” which is hard to fault because the entire tech industry makes the same mistake.
yes!
@eiaine yes!
i'm ready
are you using magit? it's such a good friend in times of...
@harrisj are you using magit?
Some of the best women I know are programmers.
Some of the best women I know are programmers.
its just weird to see it as news
market and chill
I know it really puts things into perspective
eh fetish is okay too
you are in for a treat
http://www.catb.org/esr/writings/dancing.html
@amyhoy http://www. catb.
not looking
http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/5194018 its worse than you...
@bn2b http://m. huffpost.
HUH
the one where he told you how to hit on women in elevators...
I think Harper's once tried to make Tom Frank read the...
I agree that I have unusual tolerances.
@Tyrangiel I agree that I have unusual tolerances.
bookmarked
tbh I would read this, this actually looks pretty good to...
THOSE comments tho
This comment thread, what a world...
This comment thread, what a world http://esr. ibiblio.
it really was!
@allenpg it really was!
towards a more perfect bisect
I know we've been talking about how software is culture for...
I know we've been talking about how software is culture for decades but it is pretty weird when it actually happens.
esr thinks SJWs wanted to honeypot Linus, emacs is getting...
esr thinks SJWs wanted to honeypot Linus, emacs is getting a code of conduct, and Perl6 will ship, the cathedral is fucking bizarre.
yeah but emacs is getting a code of conduct! WHAT A WORLD.
@anildash @harrisj yeah but emacs is getting a code of conduct! WHAT A WORLD.
Some days you just want to git reset --hard the world.
Some days you just want to git reset --hard the world.
What is happening http://nymag.com/following/2015/11/this-th...
What is happening http://nymag. com/following/2015/11/this-the-perfect-insane-anti-feminist-rumor.
tbh joel i just wanted you to untie me
relax, 20 years of relentless praise has done nothing to...
I was just so amazed when they emailed it
I hadn't that's nice
sensible
plus the sense of death just slightly at bay to add some...
right?
@jordne right?
Yes god has burdened the afflicted with bursting pustules...
Yes god has burdened the afflicted with bursting pustules and death, but otoh this is a great time to paint the kitchen and play videogames.
Do you ever read plague-ey things like The Decameron or...
Do you ever read plague-ey things like The Decameron or Journal of the Plague Year and think, that sounds kind of neat?
lolol i don't mind. i'm sort of used to it.
@SrPablo lolol i don't mind. i'm sort of used to it.
oh yes
i worry constantly it's wonderful
My new gym is so snooty they don't have an Android app.
My new gym is so snooty they don't have an Android app.
this is good preparation for the future of the brands
My overall Twitter aesthetic is humblecore.
My overall Twitter aesthetic is humblecore.
what kid wouldn't want to live under the stairs?
@Cruftbox @anildash what kid wouldn't want to live under the stairs?
bloomberg already has that in the budget
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/661907363713130496/photo/1
@harrisj @anildash https://twitter.
I just need to stop the violence for 20 minutes
it's sooooo good too bad it won't happen again until they...
true—redeye from Portland is a rich sensory experience
thanks that feels normal
gotta respect the skill of the puppeteers who control jimmy...
But to be fair they love watching TV and they love...
But to be fair they love watching TV and they love breakfast and the fact that I combined these was almost too much for them to handle.
So I could shower I told my kids they could eat cereal...
So I could shower I told my kids they could eat cereal while watching TV, and my son gasped in wonder, like I'd told him he could fly.
Achievement 2 of 2: I took the redeye back, landed at 5am,...
Achievement 2 of 2: I took the redeye back, landed at 5am, went home, saw my wife off to work on time, and took the kids to pre-k by 8:10.
Achievement 1 of 2: I spoke at Mozilla's View Source...
Achievement 1 of 2: I spoke at Mozilla's View Source conference about “The state of the web” and not one person stood and yelled FRAUD.
this is good and interesting. the internet talks a lot of...
@drunkenbee this is good and interesting. the internet talks a lot of shit.
thanks! Hi!
@infophysics thanks! Hi!
kill me
Oh wow this redeye between PDX and JFK stops in Phoenix I...
Oh wow this redeye between PDX and JFK stops in Phoenix I am honestly a very poor planner at times.
LOL Nothing Matters: A Defense of the Internet’s Absence of Meaning
I know but macklemore is the most problematic fave
because I love that stupid song
oh god is it okay to like that song
because i love the smell of burning world
Remember on http://tilde.club when we used broadcast...
Remember on http://tilde. club when we used broadcast messaging straight from bash?
thank you!
@evoliver @viewsourceconf thank you!
thank you! Say hi if u see me
@helenvholmes thank you!
“Notes on Twitter Hearts” @pdavies...
“Notes on Twitter Hearts” @pdavies @pete /notes-on-twitter-hearts-d72274594189" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.
This is my consumer digital products consumer panic world...
*fav guy* my stars!
*fav guy* my stars!
sooo good
Oregon CPA conference at this hotel kicked off right at 8am
but everything was my favorite
sorry it was right there
then you're doing great!
@HeyVeronica then you're doing great!
meanwhile at facebook [CUT TO ENORMOUS GEODESIC DOME ON...
a genuinely interesting and challenging decision would've...
this heart thing is a totally sensible product decision for...
imagine the heart-shaped meetings
ulgh i tried to fave this but there are these hearts...
Achievement unlocked.
Achievement unlocked.
open source wakes up
Paul are you a pharmacist
yes
will ping! Can't remember when flight is.
@mathowie will ping! Can't remember when flight is.
my wife started a new job so my schedule is really dumb
I think sleep is coming now.
I think sleep is coming now.
lol
excellent advice I would likely greatly enjoy that book
I'm not really here. But I'm at conference which is at the...
@sixfoot6 I'm not really here. But I'm at conference which is at the armory?
Because like an idiot I'm taking a redeye back tomorrow so...
Because like an idiot I'm taking a redeye back tomorrow so that maybe I can take the kids to school in the morning.
I am going to wake up no earlier than 530AM PST. I can do...
I am going to wake up no earlier than 530AM PST. I can do this.
(Portland is providing some excellent white noise right now...
(Portland is providing some excellent white noise right now but come on what other color of noise do they have here.
I went to Powell's and bought a Melville House book on...
I went to Powell's and bought a Melville House book on economics which I am just about to read. I also have both the fan on and window open.
I also finished my conference deck tonight to cut stress...
I also finished my conference deck tonight to cut stress and talked with my kids on hangout. I cut caffeine after 2pm.
I drank two beers and took two Benadryl and I forgave...
I drank two beers and took two Benadryl and I forgave myself at least three major life-inadequacies. But that's just a start.
So I'm in Portland, OR, from NYC, to speak at a conference,...
So I'm in Portland, OR, from NYC, to speak at a conference, and I'm going to attempt the ultimate dad move, which is to sleep beyond 3:30AM.
Then, in 2017, came the Candytown riots.
Then, in 2017, came the Candytown riots.
I'm the Internet
it's strong but her ears don't do that little “i see you”...
this is really extraordinary
small problem
nah not buying it. Marketing is more powerful than the...
@patbits nah not buying it. Marketing is more powerful than the force.
I like the part of packing where you dress yourself in...
I like the part of packing where you dress yourself in abstract multiples. “4 pair socks for feet, 4 pair underwear, 2 pair jeans for legs.
7am flights seem practical when you schedule them, then the...
7am flights seem practical when you schedule them, then the night before you're staring at a damp sweater drying next to a carry-on bag.
oh wow i just remembered a gmail label that i haven't...
jon at this stage i take my ships of theseus where i find em
my point is that everyone is wrong and we should all be...
but he's right just because something works for a couple...
“My cats are healthy and stay indoors.” “How very lucky for...
“My cats are healthy and stay indoors. ” “How very lucky for you.
i love this https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/66090571611129...
i love this https://twitter.
cool w me
it's a shame we're having this conversation on...
@knowtheory @jennschiffer it's a shame we're having this conversation on https://twitter.
That sound you hear is a thousand new media studies...
@worrydream That sound you hear is a thousand new media studies professors updating their syllabi.
i've been reading the perl6 logs they're so fun
it's the greatest way to learn a technology though because...
Last 2 things: Zero discoverability for conversations. And...
@jennschiffer Last 2 things: Zero discoverability for conversations. And log formatting ALWAYS sucks so you can't get your bearings.
"IRC is a chat network where the best communities work...
@jennschiffer "IRC is a chat network where the best communities work together and share knowledge. It takes 10 minutes to learn.
these are the good docs http://www.irchelp.org/ but where...
@jennschiffer these are the good docs http://www. irchelp.
also bots are screaming at you all the time and you have no...
Once you log in you are going to do something wrong and you...
@jennschiffer Once you log in you are going to do something wrong and you will feel like a loser and every time you do anything it tattles.
Docs are insane, INSANE, INSANE. Native clients are weird...
@jennschiffer Docs are insane, INSANE, INSANE. Native clients are weird and janky.
i went through this myself and also helping people on...
@jennschiffer i went through this myself and also helping people on http://tilde.
he would have loved the content he inspired
Last night I stayed home, had a couple drinks, and made a...
Last night I stayed home, had a couple drinks, and made a big pile of old newspapers, but no one recognized my George Bell costume.
oh wow those look...soft
@Choire oh wow those look...
blocking u
I will vote for whoever changes this
to do this on a morning where there is like an 120% chance...
its two disasters at once
they are crying because we won't let them eat candy for...
So good. Via http://mlkshk.com/p/16DK7...
So good. Via http://mlkshk.
very strong work
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/389916879348723712
https://twitter.
halloween is saved https://instagram.com/p/9fX7wVPa0j/
halloween is saved https://instagram.
Which has the Internet ruined more?
Which has the Internet ruined more?
come on going as yourself is lame
its good practice for when you need to get both of your...
ClojureIRC's mungojelly: everything is...
impressive findings
science says we're BOTH right
Well, this proves it, we should spend that billion dollars...
Well, this proves it, we should spend that billion dollars on B. https://twitter.
just avoid eye contact
fortune then compile emacs from HEAD
*Personal brand voice* My personal brand!
*Personal brand voice* My personal brand!
jeeeeesus keeerist
by robots
Press release: There is no agency, brand, or media company...
Press release: There is no agency, brand, or media company that can beat @PostlightAgency at reaction GIF chatting https://twitter.
accurate https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/66011188860125184...
accurate https://twitter.
Sunn O
Will you go to prom with me?
Will you go to prom with me?
elizabeth you have a podcast?
@elizabethminkel elizabeth you have a podcast?
okay so obviously the answer is NO, you must NEVER say that
are you ever allowed to say “maybe that's enough cartoons...
are you ever allowed to say “maybe that's enough cartoons for now? ” http://www.
thank you!
@BlairGemmer thank you!
wow that is amazing
and like, what would it be like if you basically never had...
I read shit like this and think about white people going...
I think they are posting them somewhere too they own YouTube
I'll figure something out
lol no people here are up to stuff
True it's a good book. https://twitter.com/monkchips/status/...
True it's a good book. https://twitter.
yes I am amazing
As a writer, I am the fattest person at this design...
As a writer, I am the fattest person at this design conference.
I am giving a talk in the early evening and it is a totally...
I am giving a talk in the early evening and it is a totally new talk about how everyone lies about talent.
I am at #SPAN15 a design conference sponsored by Google...
I am at #SPAN15 a design conference sponsored by Google Design, and the entire space is beautifully appointed with custom textiles.
perl6 runs on the JVM so there's clojure; maybe someone...
Clojure or Perl6?
Clojure or Perl6?
christmas rusty we just have to wait until christmas
look this is fine for an entertainment product but it...
oh for gods sake
This is great. I hope they let me download the whole damn...
This is great. I hope they let me download the whole damn thing.
you're telling me
I keep telling you guys I'm like Cassandra but fun....
I keep telling you guys I'm like Cassandra but fun. https://twitter.
wow via @redkeg i just learned about this john cena prank...
wow via @redkeg i just learned about this john cena prank call https://www. youtube.
i mean that's just good content
and you don't even drink!
@anildash @PostlightAgency and you don't even drink!
The word “truth” is a cultural disaster zone.
The word “truth” is a cultural disaster zone.
“Narrative truth” (not truth) is critical to the film...
“Narrative truth” (not truth) is critical to the film industry's sense of story and marketing, and worth way more $ than journalistic truth.
This @stevenlevy interview with Aaron Sorkin about making...
This @stevenlevy interview with Aaron Sorkin about making up true-ish things for the Steve Jobs movie is great https://medium. com/backchannel/this-isn-t-the-steve-jobs-story-ea016107cace#.
you know what always helps me recover after a big party?...
@PostlightAgency you know what always helps me recover after a big party? Some nice fresh oysters.
i like this a lot especially the flower on the ground
ulgh this joke brings out my rancor
i cannot fault any human for not picking up on a joke that...
https://www.google.com/search?q=talk+talk+songs&oq=talk+talk...
@loweffort https://www. google.
the ones where i actually include code are nerdier
our party tonight will likely have less boning but some...
man it seems like the TalkTalk network was living in...
the Empire must had an rms
Fred Brooks says build one to throw away maybe that was the...
a lot of these issues would have been spotted by a good...
You know, given the scope of deployment and commercial...
You know, given the scope of deployment and commercial issues, the Empire and Rebellion MUST have both relied on open-force software.
I mean that's the thing is there one OS or many? Did R2D2...
@harrisj I mean that's the thing is there one OS or many? Did R2D2 and the Death Star share an OS or just a protocol?
talk about the Empire
Yes nerds I KNOW R2D2 doesn't actually run on the Jabba...
Yes nerds I KNOW R2D2 doesn't actually run on the Jabba Virtual Machine. He's obviously built on the Android runtime.
understood. Would welcome a visit!
@kthread understood. Would welcome a visit!
R2D2 actually runs on top of the Jabba Virtual Machine.
R2D2 actually runs on top of the Jabba Virtual Machine.
we have so much money and want so many fun things and we...
it is a teensy bit oversubscribed; it's going to be...
niiiice
The two-Genesis theory is bankrupt. Something that is 75%...
The two-Genesis theory is bankrupt. Something that is 75% Genesis is still Genesis.
I keep rolling it over in my mind it's such an indicator...
@kjhealy I keep rolling it over in my mind it's such an indicator of...
You kids grew up in a world where hundreds of bands sound...
You kids grew up in a world where hundreds of bands sound like Genesis but my generation was forced to live with just one Genesis.
fridge is human gamergate
These days on the Internet you can't even tell if a false...
These days on the Internet you can't even tell if a false flag is real.
Here's some useful background on that whole thing sheesh...
Here's some useful background on that whole thing sheesh what a thing http://jezebel.
It's about ethics in bomb threats.
It's about ethics in bomb threats.
it is really insane!
@maayanroth it is really insane!
We had to cancel the session in order to save it.
We had to cancel the session in order to save it.
This doesn't go far enough. They should also cancel SxSW....
This doesn't go far enough. They should also cancel SxSW.
as i'll ever be. building a brand is hard. sometimes you...
@PostlightAgency as i'll ever be. building a brand is hard.
I think it'll be okay tbh, as long as I just flesh out a...
@PostlightAgency I think it'll be okay tbh, as long as I just flesh out a few ideas.
Yeah but I've got a lot written; I'm thinking I'll do it...
@PostlightAgency Yeah but I've got a lot written; I'm thinking I'll do it more as a reading with just a few slides. Lecture style.
et tu, brand?
@PostlightAgency et tu, brand?
Feeling good tbh.
@PostlightAgency Feeling good tbh.
cool i look forward to engaging
i'm totally kidding i know normal blogs don't provide...
max what makes a blog pop-up? is sounds like a normal blog...
@max_read max what makes a blog pop-up? is sounds like a normal blog but they don't have to provide health insurance.
what does fridge think i wonder
I'm in so far over my head on this one
We've spent hours talking about how grown-ups always come...
We've spent hours talking about how grown-ups always come back from trips, and now we watched Frozen so I'm waiting for that shoe to drop.
i never saw gilmore girls before why does the tall woman...
i never saw gilmore girls before why does the tall woman wear a blazer over a cranberry turtleneck sweater to call her mother?
damn shame
that's when my tweeting goes to 11
90s +1, music +1, pun +1, lowercase +1, internet +1, media...
@bn2b 90s +1, music +1, pun +1, lowercase +1, internet +1, media +1, behind news cycle +1, pointless +1. missing: offensive, code sample.
“Saying Grace Historically Considered”...
“Saying Grace Historically Considered” https://archive.
back for another one of those adblockin beats
Subject line was, “LEFT ME ALONE...”...
Subject line was, “LEFT ME ALONE... ” https://twitter.
I liked it
it was okay
i squashed across merges today
via http://mlkshk.com/p/169VL https://twitter.com/ftrain/sta...
via http://mlkshk. com/p/169VL https://twitter.
You’re a good brand and I respect you.
@PostlightAgency You’re a good brand and I respect you.
i have so much affectation for all of you
lol part of the job
seems low
can't! I'm in Portland on the 3rd but have to go home right...
@kyledrake can't!
i want to go back in time and punch myself in the face
Yes
One thing the New York Times Magazine feels totally...
One thing the New York Times Magazine feels totally comfortable killing is any essay I write.
good luck getting to the hamptons you time-travelling dick
how is babby hilter killed / how klara get pragnent
tough but fair
not independently
would it be okay to pull down hitler's diaper if he was a...
would it be okay to abort hitler before eight weeks
i invited a lot of the NYTM editorial staff to the party on...
@leahfinnegan i invited a lot of the NYTM editorial staff to the party on Tuesday if you want I can reserve a conf. room.
i'm here
what about the goebbels children
you can just abbreviate that as ATROBS now
this would work
on stage, or in the audience? yes.
@patbits on stage, or in the audience? yes.
You could give a very successful talk explaining why you...
I would see that as an opportunity to reinvent myself
Literally the worst fucking idea.
Literally the worst fucking idea.
I would get like “B-” in “engaging, thoughtful.”
I would get like “B-” in “engaging, thoughtful.
One thing that seems to no longer happen at tech...
One thing that seems to no longer happen at tech conferences is when they send you the results of audience surveys of your talk.
honestly they kind of worked that one out in the last ten...
90% of conference preparation is hoping the AC works and...
90% of conference preparation is hoping the AC works and the remaining 10% is pants selection.
that's battledecks!
@mims that's battledecks!
this is an amazing idea. "My ankle recovery."
@elbrendano this is an amazing idea. "My ankle recovery.
I pontificate authentically.
I pontificate authentically.
I think people who are good at conferences give the same...
I think people who are good at conferences give the same speech more than once and also get paid in non-totebag form. Not me.
When you speak at conferences they are always asking for...
When you speak at conferences they are always asking for your slides like two weeks ahead and I wonder what that could be like.
I'm unprepared.
I'm unprepared.
our lives are a little sad when you look at them this way
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/452211724348059649
@caseyjohnston https://twitter.
I'm not here
You can just look at people sometimes and tell that it's...
You can just look at people sometimes and tell that it's been months since they were ejected properly.
no i already shut that part of myself down i’m not insane
wow i didn’t realize it until right now but i have some...
<input> tag still a mess but you know what I miss is...
&lt;input&gt; tag still a mess but you know what I miss is &lt;isindex&gt; http://meowni.
sigh i wish i'd known as i'm in portland on the 3rd for...
“I was in magazines before all the magazines died.”...
“I was in magazines before all the magazines died. ” — @johnjcook http://jimromenesko.
right on the hudson
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/657247226465558530/photo/1
@patbits https://twitter.
i'm ready joel. i think i'm ready.
@jpotisch i'm ready joel. i think i'm ready.
god i am the best troll
it's good to keep it nice and appetizery, maybe...
this is excellent advice! I have a good memory for dates...
@patbits this is excellent advice! I have a good memory for dates though.
“You're welcome.”
@leahfinnegan “You're welcome.
did this
holy shit that is a weird piece of writing
is there a glut of exposed sexy professor things lately?...
@leahfinnegan is there a glut of exposed sexy professor things lately? Because that is a genuinely great trend piece if so.
thank you!
@daturkel thank you!
here were the stories we were going to run September 11th
hahahahaha
it just all feels so in the bag for Hillary
Future pluperfect?
Future pluperfect?
What verb tense even is this.
What verb tense even is this.
Here's how the newspaper would have looked if Dewey had...
Here's how the newspaper would have looked if Dewey had defeated Truman.
TRUE
This is less like beating a dead horse and more like...
This is less like beating a dead horse and more like milking a dead cow.
What even http://www.nytimes.com/2015/10/22/upshot/what-we-w...
What even http://www. nytimes.
just excuse yourself halfway through and then come back and...
hahah all those things make me a worse...
why do they hate our shells
this is the deadline on my book manuscript and your tweet...
it's bad
or any toilet
when you see something like that the most sensible solution...
http://mlkshk.com/p/168L2
http://mlkshk.
look Jack all I know is that he harvested ten million...
I guess it makes sense that the culture that welcomes...
I guess it makes sense that the culture that welcomes barbarians is building the empire.
Media: “You worked at http://SlightlyTrashy.biz? Ulgh, your...
Media: “You worked at http://SlightlyTrashy. biz?
this made me laugh a lot
Have your take and eat it too.
Have your take and eat it too.
strong
dammit josh this needs a neologism and you know it
I hate Star Wars! I love Star Wars! What is a Star War? Jar...
I hate Star Wars! I love Star Wars!
Is there a name for stuff like the Star Wars trailer where...
Is there a name for stuff like the Star Wars trailer where every possible opinion is registered across every medium but it means nothing?
good photo research here today
Sometimes I imagine having to explain things about the web...
Sometimes I imagine having to explain things about the web to the Rat Pack and Sinatra is like, “Let me tell you about MY cookie policy.
most of my friends are bots now is this bot kind?
@benbrown @HowdyAI @SlackHQ most of my friends are bots now is this bot kind?
scaling writing tools has always been a problem...
scaling writing tools has always been a problem https://instagram. com/p/9EagdoTVg0/?
Thanks, MFA IxD! BTW, SVA folks should totally come to the...
@svaixd Thanks, MFA IxD! BTW, SVA folks should totally come to the party we're throwing http://www.
the only thing missing are the emacs keybindings
I also like the way that hyphens between numerals are...
@waxpancake @mwichary I also like the way that hyphens between numerals are automatically turned into n-dashes.
kljhdfafs'klha'klha'hkl;
because fish have sca
wow that puts the scale into webscale
to us sure. lots of people have yet to make the distinction!
@vgr to us sure. lots of people have yet to make the distinction!
Well that's what's changed; it was always an illusion but...
@vgr Well that's what's changed; it was always an illusion but now they talk and talk.
Actually I don't have that much empathy, if I am honest...
@vgr Actually I don't have that much empathy, if I am honest with myself.
I have nothing but empathy for her. But it's not...
@vgr I have nothing but empathy for her. But it's not entitlement; it's a new kind of territoriality that doesn't respect literary borders.
the internet is faster now but it definitely used to smell...
what is a tuna blaster
I love this time of year, when everyone starts to access...
I love this time of year, when everyone starts to access the Internet through cableknit modems.
equinox is literally across the street though and winter is...
jeeeesus
Legal tip: Everyone needs to update their wills to clarify...
Legal tip: Everyone needs to update their wills to clarify who owns their 3D likeness.
shits across the st I just need to lose 100 lbs without eye...
that sounds great until we get to that stupid hill
I'm going to be the fattest person at the Union Square...
I'm going to be the fattest person at the Union Square Equinox and I'm not going to go hungry because I will eat your disgust.
I'm about to join a gym again which means I need to...
I'm about to join a gym again which means I need to practice avoiding eye contact and frowning.
ulgh this is too real
When you die and see heaven and doctors bring you back to...
When you die and see heaven and doctors bring you back to life do you have to do the tutorial again before you can start your life over?
paul carr is someone totally different i am paul ford
i can’t stand writing
lance sometimes you just want a goddam fruit salad without...
@LanceKeebs lance sometimes you just want a goddam fruit salad without all the melon and if that's not what https://twitter.
what in god's name is this
I made $280 (56%) trading $BRKB, trailing the stock and...
I made $280 (56%) trading $BRKB, trailing the stock and beating the market! Play the @business Trading Game: http://www.
congratulations on the relaunch of...
@leahfinnegan @jamiekeiles congratulations on the relaunch of http://www. leahfinnegan.
goddammit
we WANTED the brands, though, we were so sure that culture...
GODDAMMIT GET ME BACK INTO ATTACK POSITION WITHIN THE NEXT...
okay bring it around six degrees starboard and in ninety...
just want to point out, not without regret, that “blimp...
It's fun to watch two powerful organizations—Amazon &...
It's fun to watch two powerful organizations—Amazon &amp; NYT—that are utterly full of themselves go at it on Medium. It's like blimp jousting.
I read this and just immediately think, “wow, that Times...
I read this and just immediately think, “wow, that Times article must have been REALLY true, not just partially. ” @jaycarney /what-the-new-york-times-didn-t-tell-you-a1128aa78931" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.
melon is the same as giving up
“a music scoring system using pic and...
“a music scoring system using pic and troff”— http://www. langston.
what else would it be
the rate is too low
don't do it
i don’t drive
Absolutely accurate.
@jfeckstein Absolutely accurate.
I just spent $2 for $0.50 worth of pineapple. NYC needs to...
@jfeckstein I just spent $2 for $0. 50 worth of pineapple.
A bodega breakfast fruit salad honeydew is worth about...
A bodega breakfast fruit salad honeydew is worth about $60/lb.
it was never, ever a mistake
Yeah put three blueberries and a pineapple chunk on top of...
Yeah put three blueberries and a pineapple chunk on top of a half-pound of melon no one will even notice also it's $4. 99.
“I need a breakfast fruit salad without any goddamn granola...
“I need a breakfast fruit salad without any goddamn granola or yogurt where they don't bottomload with shitmelon.
$105
I will pay you $100 to rewrite that story but make it about...
we owe it to him to live each day entirely alone in a pile...
huh!
@mbostock @tophtucker @rozzie huh!
https://github.com/Jam3/math-as-code, i.e....
@kosamari https://github. com/Jam3/math-as-code, i.
Oh and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sahawar search for...
@ajaymehta Oh and https://en. wikipedia.
a subtle example--see https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kasganj...
@ajaymehta a subtle example--see https://en. wikipedia.
honored more in the breach tho
I like to export mine to PDF via LaTeX and think of it as...
@harrisj @fhwang I like to export mine to PDF via LaTeX and think of it as The Big Story of My Plans—tasks converting into knowledge.
nah he just forgot to add the other countries to the front...
but maybe the future has other plans for us aneel
I remember too one of the big video services had to block...
@ajaymehta I remember too one of the big video services had to block India for a while because people would just stream all day.
Cultural patterns of usage are fascinating, like when...
@ajaymehta Cultural patterns of usage are fascinating, like when Wikipedia pages for small Indian towns have ads for taxi services.
you'd be so productive you could basically just stop working
but in the larger sense this is pretty far along and works...
@cantoni but in the larger sense this is pretty far along and works across [many] browsers, not just windows: http://www. html5rocks.
sure i can click on your avatar, drag it, and open the URL...
jacob you always do this thing where you're like, "and then...
@harrisj @fhwang jacob you always do this thing where you're like, "and then they find me boring" right when we're all like NAT? DO GO ON...
yes, but it's weird/too bad that this is impossible at the...
NOW MORE THAN EVER
fair
plus the $EDITOR is still emacs
oh i've tried 'em but mutt is just so damn thorough
srsly though
guys this war was already won http://inkel.github.io/github-...
@harrisj @fhwang guys this war was already won http://inkel. github.
i got tmux set up real nice with mouse support it makes me...
i mean it's okay because i have mutt i cannot complain i'm...
different addresses have totally different contexts and...
i'd love to be able to switch context between home/personal...
i tried doing email in emacs using notmuch but kept hitting...
no it stops at the edge of the browser
The last thing I need is a solution.
The last thing I need is a solution.
guys i download my email using offlineimap then index it...
meanwhile there's no shortage of doofuses trying to fix...
i guess i could just forward the email from one account to...
i guess i could just forward the email from one account to the other ! like!
what bums me out is that the more advanced the web...
what if i had 2 gmail accounts open & wanted to drag...
what if i had 2 gmail accounts open &amp; wanted to drag one email to the other account—impossible, right? now what if it was 1 gmail, 1 yahoo?
Software is COMPLICATED http://www.caravanmagazine.in/lede/...
Software is COMPLICATED http://www. caravanmagazine.
but when they hit it, it's just so magical
anyway that piece set me thinking about trans stuff, body...
whatever else is going on, you stick to the protocol, hit...
at some level the standard of "professionalism" is a really...
yeah work doesn't always encourage the sort of awareness...
@moishel yeah work doesn't always encourage the sort of awareness that leads to a close relationship with our bodies but also it's on us.
also it made me think about the kind of *employer* I want...
@robynkanner also it made me think about the kind of *employer* I want to be which is always useful.
it was a really nicely written piece!
@robynkanner it was a really nicely written piece!
I know this is obvious and well-documented consider me...
I know this is obvious and well-documented consider me preyelled@.
Work is so often in opposition to our bodies.
Work is so often in opposition to our bodies.
What it's like to balance a bilateral orchiectomy with...
What it's like to balance a bilateral orchiectomy with client work http://robynkanner. tumblr.
alpha hardware was cool
a book by my dad http://turksheadreview.com/sprucealley/eboo...
a book by my dad http://turksheadreview. com/sprucealley/ebooks/singingwire.
I think this style worked before we had a place to complain...
I read the whole thing though
https://twitter.com/_alex_mar/status/654684623167877120
@laura_june https://twitter.
they will help its their job
be very polite give the women money and don't touch anyone...
Oh god my scalp is burning and the train has paused and...
Oh god my scalp is burning and the train has paused and that Taylor Swift song by The Knocks is playing on my phone.
whoa if true
The train just came out of a tunnel and I am 60% bedbugs.
The train just came out of a tunnel and I am 60% bedbugs.
My whole body immediately grew 10° hotter and began to itch...
My whole body immediately grew 10° hotter and began to itch so bad I feel like I'm pulsating.
When you get home, wrote my wife, put all of your clothes...
When you get home, wrote my wife, put all of your clothes in the washer immediately because of Times Square bedbug risk.
I activated my opinion suppression module but the module...
I activated my opinion suppression module but the module failed.
I am a miserably critical human being who is about to watch...
I am a miserably critical human being who is about to watch The Martian by myself in Times Square. There was already an ad for Slack.
and her hair!
@AndrewCrow and her hair!
sure if by bed you mean a human containment pod on my...
look at that toy lee it has a FACE THAT YOU RIP OFF TO...
they tried to warn us https://archive.org/stream/starlog_mag...
they tried to warn us #page /n3/mode/1up" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://archive. org/stream/starlog_magazine-130/130 #page /n3/mode/1up https://twitter.
i want all this merch https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/6551...
i want all this merch https://twitter.
“the hairclip hanger” fml
yeah good point
want to get a drink?
@PostlightAgency want to get a drink?
cool tweet
tbh i have no idea what’s going on and haven’t met anyone...
done
i delete so many tweets
Janet you went to journalism college
janet
But seriously where are her hair clips.
@PostlightAgency @maureenflaherty But seriously where are her hair clips.
beautiful
Sometimes thoughts get promoted to thought leadership even...
Sometimes thoughts get promoted to thought leadership even though they are far more productive and happy as thoughts.
not for me to judge! i had a nice time though.
@djacobs not for me to judge! i had a nice time though.
please subscribe me to your mailing list
where can a person see said chart
I take express buses
the whole point of product management is to take those...
If ever you are lost, ask the brands.
If ever you are lost, ask the brands.
IBM, with the design by Paul Rand, in a Bernbach campaign.
@kevdog IBM, with the design by Paul Rand, in a Bernbach campaign.
There was no concept of “basic guaranteed income” before...
There was no concept of “basic guaranteed income” before McDonalds had Grimace say those words.
Equality is a little different. It was used to sell perfume...
Equality is a little different. It was used to sell perfume in post-war France and spread from there.
Love? Purely a GE campaign in 1956.
Love? Purely a GE campaign in 1956.
Basic human rights was invented by Coca-Cola because they...
Basic human rights was invented by Coca-Cola because they had excess grape syrup they needed to sell quickly.
True fact: Happiness is a concept created by marketers in...
True fact: Happiness is a concept created by marketers in 1918 in order to sell mouthwash.
growing the community
Scsi was a great port don't let no one tell you different.
Scsi was a great port don't let no one tell you different.
it was the billfold
oh wow
yep
And my cats.
And my cats.
my next big data
I've written about THAT at length though.
@tomscocca I've written about THAT at length though.
And my fans.
And my fans.
And my friends.
And my friends.
what in gods name
At the same time, I REALLY miss writing fiction.
At the same time, I REALLY miss writing fiction.
Sometimes I have Meetups alone.
Sometimes I have Meetups alone.
oh that role is TOTALLY filled
I mean when will we even schedule this?
@alexismallen I mean when will we even schedule this?
I mean half the time, I'm a fan!
@MmichaelLlucy I mean half the time, I'm a fan!
I mean it is the defining thing that defines our...
@MmichaelLlucy I mean it is the defining thing that defines our experiences, you can't really ignore it.
People are funny about global capitalism but I like...
People are funny about global capitalism but I like bringing it up in meetings.
first you want to go literal like with...
@88mpg first you want to go literal like with http://butt. holdings.
Matt They didn't have those cars
my secret is I am always late for everything
Brands
I see the edge of the desk from reception
guys come by we will talk about the only thing greater than...
that book was VERY soothing esp. re accepting process
@RickWebb @anildash @barbariangroup that book was VERY soothing esp.
I will ask about sharks
wait you are the Rick who wrote the super helpful book...
“trick”
that's a good myth!
@djacobs @barbariangroup that's a good myth!
it wasn't me who changed anil https://twitter.com/ftrain/sta...
@anildash @jkottke it wasn't me who changed anil https://twitter.
“tweet handle”
just appearing will be fun and awkward like when i went to...
i don't think they have time to respond to the section in...
ulgh shaun
honestly it's a question for all of us to consider
first you laugh at the superdesk, then you fight the...
goddamit gf3
why would anyone want to subvert advertising when it's made...
@Nullsleep @barbariangroup why would anyone want to subvert advertising when it's made us so happy?
dan
nerd alternafoods would be a fascinating event tbh
good between that and @lindseyweber i'm down to around 20...
okay fine that does solve it
Jenn I co-founded an @PostlightAgency near Union Square...
@jennschiffer Jenn I co-founded an @PostlightAgency near Union Square with a really pleasant kitchen and I think we have a blender.
that's like three minutes of 25/30 lindsey
wait this website wut even
has anyone ever done like a hosted soylent tasting?
@jennschiffer @barbariangroup has anyone ever done like a hosted soylent tasting?
good idea but until the @joshuatopolsky lawsuit resolves...
anil do you want to come over it's on 20th near 6th
wait where is it real?
@jennschiffer @barbariangroup wait where is it real?
will do
noted
important note: they have a GIGANTIC DESK...
important note: they have a GIGANTIC DESK https://vimeo.
i'm going to go talk to the @barbariangroup today and i'm...
what should i discuss during my visit tell me
well that's the boss tweeting tho
waaaaaait we don't know about individual officer Festo...
I know it is an amazing coptweet
An EdTech Buzzword Bingo Card
real life
I tried to explain to two pizza-eating 4-yr olds why Peppa...
I tried to explain to two pizza-eating 4-yr olds why Peppa Pig would never eat pepperoni and ended up in an ontological shit hurricane.
The text in that post I screenshotted is just my personal...
The text in that post I screenshotted is just my personal lorem ipsum.
Holy shit if you type “TK“ in Medium it now puts a little...
Holy shit if you type “TK“ in Medium it now puts a little “TK” in the margin this is HUGE. https://twitter.
Patrick I *LOVE* Professor Dumpster...
@patbits Patrick I *LOVE* Professor Dumpster https://twitter.
Yeah, it's so weird/sad to see people crowing about the...
Yeah, it's so weird/sad to see people crowing about the Twitter layoffs. Layoffs suck for everyone.
this gets so bad if someone does a pastebin
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X02EwkGqyto
@PJVogt @Choire https://www. youtube.
year literally you can FEEL @pjvogt going “I need 100...
@lizzieohreally @katienotopoulos year literally you can FEEL @pjvogt going “I need 100 people so I can feel cool” and then going, Oh, Paul!
my god pj
:(
ulgh drew why
a copy editor just justified their five-figure salary right...
nice work
Good dogwhistle burn for media buyers.
Good dogwhistle burn for media buyers.
“The difference between us and Vice,” he said, “is that...
“The difference between us and Vice,” he said, “is that we’re going after the guy with a job. ” http://nyti.
thank you for making it possible!
@marcprecipice thank you for making it possible!
Chincharms
that sounds amazing tbh
TOO SOON
not cool dude
i'm kind of excited about this language it's sort of like...
what a world
I'm not a brilliant businessperson by any means but I'm...
I'm not a brilliant businessperson by any means but I'm seeing a major marketplace gap in terms of antiqued silver celtic knots.
Here are the popular results for “Beard Ornament” on Etsy:...
Here are the popular results for “Beard Ornament” on Etsy: https://www. etsy.
It's happening! This Christmas!
@bennyfactor It's happening! This Christmas!
is there a name for ornaments that are woven into the beard...
perl6 makes me want to grow a beard just so i can weave...
this one was okay too https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/2089...
this one was okay too https://twitter.
My best tweet. https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/15294995857...
My best tweet. https://twitter.
ICYMI: @anildash saw it yesterday....
ICYMI: @anildash saw it yesterday. https://twitter.
“I saw it yesterday.”
@anildash @amanicdroid “I saw it yesterday.
not according to that cartoon; according to that cartoon...
if you want to feel like hitler for not fostering cats...
if you want to feel like hitler for not fostering cats immediately see: http://www. breakingcatnews.
adobe products are always surprising
long lines in the text output are usually because it closed...
@kjhealy long lines in the text output are usually because it closed up the hyphens. poppler in general has a great baseline of features.
$ brew install poppler ; $ pdftotext filename.pdf - | wc...
@kjhealy $ brew install poppler ; $ pdftotext filename.
wow wow wow wow thank you @laura_june...
wow wow wow wow thank you @laura_june https://twitter.
then 4,000 more times by people writing JavaScript
This comments thread from a 2012 article is from a world of...
This comments thread from a 2012 article is from a world of warmth and kindness I no longer recognize http://www. theawl.
oh it totally is!
@michellelegro @theodoreross oh it totally is!
“Interlocking dramas designed to ensnare; bound to be a...
@leahfinnegan “Interlocking dramas designed to ensnare; bound to be a bestseller.
opinion: cold comfort farm is better than brave new world
i find aldous huxley kind of unbearable
fear is the deal-killer
you're hired!
@dakotasmith you're hired!
it's uncanny how accurate it is
wow joel
“Why Geminis Work From Home: The beginner's guide to...
Oh god yes, it's WAY too late.
@FurbleScout @PostlightAgency Oh god yes, it's WAY too late.
“Do you believe that book?” “Sometimes it's really...
“Do you believe that book? ” “Sometimes it's really accurate!
“The Leo Effect: Crafting Your Company's Creative Vision If...
I think the smartest thing you could do is combine...
I think the smartest thing you could do is combine horoscopes and business texts, do like 12 different books. “The Capricorn Manager.
i'm writing about a business-ey subject (talent) so i'm...
all over that
oh i HAVE
champ stamp is good
i know but whenever i hear it i crack up
ass antlers
Bad horse is badder than we knew....
Bad horse is badder than we knew. https://twitter.
I know it looks wonderful
this man is an american hero https://www.youtube.com/watch?t...
this man is an american hero https://www. youtube.
still, 199 more than a typical essay
God receives all DMs. Do you?
@anildash @monteiro God receives all DMs. Do you?
they fav, yet do not retweet
editors always have weirdly expensive hobbies like SCUBA or...
sunlight-readable and can still function after immersion
oh it was purely on paper, this is from the what is code...
human 100%
i was so mortified when i saw it and realized what they'd...
good times
Fair https://theintercept.com/2015/10/06/stop-sending-jonath...
Fair https://theintercept.
INCREDIBLY TRUE
Still learning.
Still learning.
I mean thinking it through a little more, shit got real...
I mean thinking it through a little more, shit got real when we rented office space and began working for clients as a team.
Shit just got real. @PostlightAgency...
Shit just got real. @PostlightAgency https://twitter.
I'm really jealous.
@mariabustillos @brewster_kahle I'm really jealous.
I am modest about most things, and I have reason to be...
I am modest about most things, and I have reason to be modest, but I will never be modest about my ability to spew words into a textbox.
At that rate, given the exact right questions, I would be...
At that rate, given the exact right questions, I would be able to write a short novel in 15 hours.
STATS: For my 1-hour @Digg Dialog I answered ALL the Most...
STATS: For my 1-hour @Digg Dialog I answered ALL the Most Dugg questions as fast as I could and wrote 3,340 wds. http://digg.
thank you it was my honor
THIS IS WHAT A BOT OR A TROLL WOULD SAY
“Oh, by the way, it's DIALOG, D I A L OG,” —My Digg Handler...
“Oh, by the way, it's DIALOG, D I A L OG,” —My Digg Handler @Digg , #onbrand #comments " target="_blank" rel="noopener">http://digg.
I'm being used to test @Digg DIALOGUES, re: my Wikipedia...
I'm being used to test @Digg DIALOGUES, re: my Wikipedia piece for TNR. Get in there NOW &amp; Ask Me, um, Something http://digg.
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/652482876848631808/photo/1
https://twitter.
that translation was the Knausgaard of my 20s
not my coinage my vintage called them thumbnails
it shows you pictures of real live pages back to 1850 if...
just scream the word EVER at the end of most sentences
cc @jenniferdaniel
yeah but the TWINS are going to be capitalists right?
@jenniferdaniel yeah but the TWINS are going to be capitalists right?
it's great!
@ericdfields it's great!
why is he reading every big design book from 1998
OMGYES
needs a title
She fights for social justice in Sherlock fandom. He's the...
She fights for social justice in Sherlock fandom. He's the #1 poster in the PUA subreddit.
Passed the Tumblr offices and there were movie trucks...
Passed the Tumblr offices and there were movie trucks outside so everyone get ready for that movie to maybe happen.
thanks for having me at your conference I enjoyed being...
hi guys
hahah that actually is amazing
you have to pontificate a lot its true
niiiiice
like he buys Nike, and a kennel, and five rockets, and...
well especially because the press would go out of its mind...
I mean Apple watch
if this acquisition strategy catches on Facebook will...
What if in the future Apple acquires Applebees and then...
What if in the future Apple acquires Applebees and then also acquires all the bees.
hope they didn't send a dental unit by accident
Amazon took care of that for you already
Welcome to App Diner where you never have to worry about...
Welcome to App Diner where you never have to worry about tipping because we already added a 30% gratuity to your bill.
I respect all who serv
Tip your waiter—you can't! he's a Google-brand Big Dog...
Tip your waiter—you can't! he's a Google-brand Big Dog Toby's Estate tip-proof breakfast bot.
If you do image editing for the government you are entitled...
If you do image editing for the government you are entitled to say you served in Channel Ops. A little photoshop joke with your coffee.
can you eat the polenta oh shit no we made it with chicken...
like ideas are not ABOUT to get the hint and leave
wow 6:10AM and it's the east coast interdisciplinarist...
no no it's GREAT that you are here we just don't have...
ideas have a strange way of showing up about 3 hours before...
ideas have a strange way of showing up about 3 hours before i give a talk and then i have to run around and find seats for them.
https://www.pointoh.co/
@reppep https://www. pointoh.
most of your thoughts relate to my deadlines ted
wow you identified my greatest weakness in one tweet
Before I get one of those “why are you asking if you don't...
Before I get one of those “why are you asking if you don't know” tweets—I have an answer, I just don't have ALL the answers.
I'm going to give a short talk about doing more than one...
I'm going to give a short talk about doing more than one thing—in my case writing &amp; programming—at Brooklyn1. 0 tomorrow.
I love paragraphs
parenting is pretty waterfall tbh
agile with raisins
Hey, Ev Williams. This is all good and interesting news.
Hey, Ev Williams . This is all good and interesting news.
Associate project manager Dash helped manage that scope creep.
Associate project manager Dash helped manage that scope creep.
cool tags
Daughter crying rn because the raisin smiley face she asked...
Daughter crying rn because the raisin smiley face she asked for in her yogurt didn't have a nose.
don't be fooled most of these horses are bots...
don't be fooled most of these horses are bots http://chatroom.
what a time to be http://mlkshk.com/p/FSX0
what a time to be http://mlkshk.
you know that will never do but the GOOD news is that the...
It sort of depends if there's a new but much broader cohort...
@rustyk5 It sort of depends if there's a new but much broader cohort of graybeardish-types writing tests for CPAN modules.
it's kind of great tbh, it took the loooooong view, like I...
Did you show them the PDF about...
@rustyk5 Did you show them the PDF about async/concurrency/parallelism and what promises can look like if done right?
my deck is a mess dude
Wow Patrick by asking me this you put me in a spot where I...
@patbits @GD_Smithers Wow Patrick by asking me this you put me in a spot where I have to say “I'm 100% white!
just got a haircut
https://medium.com/ghostboat
https://medium.
there is probably a science story in Amber Heard but it...
Lady Gaga
The Chaotic Wisdom of Wikipedia Paragraphs
Our brand has limits and good taste.
@silviakillings Our brand has limits and good taste.
capitle
jesse no jesse why
Taints.
Taints.
I can't say which parts.
I can't say which parts.
all-purpose tweet
ULGH #hillennials is already a hashtag in certain parts.
ULGH #hillennials is already a hashtag in certain parts.
I'm not Googling it.
I'm not Googling it.
Has anyone called young prospective Hillary voters...
Has anyone called young prospective Hillary voters “Hillennials” yet?
Designers, amirite?
@tarekkoudsi Designers, amirite?
Building a business is cool. https://twitter.com/PostlightAg...
Building a business is cool. https://twitter.
world-famous collection of meteorite crystals
seems legit
Was just walking down the street and said out loud to...
Was just walking down the street and said out loud to myself “You just got your Sturzende in my Neubaten! ” and I have no idea why.
“The experience and emotions tied to listening to Kid A are...
“The experience and emotions tied to listening to Kid A are like witnessing the stillborn birth of a child.
no it's easy because ivy has the mark of woman's shame
what's weird is the # of people who ask if they are...
ulgh why did i even sleep then
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/650857061723471876/photo/1
https://twitter.
personally i love red zone literature
Since people take the time to reach out I try to meet them...
Since people take the time to reach out I try to meet them where they are.
This was my reply FWIW https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/650...
This was my reply FWIW https://twitter.
One thing that rarely gets discussed is how people from...
One thing that rarely gets discussed is how people from Yellow Zone can only enter the Blue Zone if they have the Green Key.
The thing that makes me hope that civilization has not...
The thing that makes me hope that civilization has not imploded into a chaos of drifting signifiers is that “Blue Zone” is in quotes.
“[Assistant's name], send this person an email and find out...
“[Assistant's name], send this person an email and find out if he has anything else for the Blue Zone.
I think a lot about this email and the circumstances that...
I think a lot about this email and the circumstances that caused it to be sent. https://twitter.
In Praise of Meaningless Work http://www.newrepublic.com/art...
In Praise of Meaningless Work http://www. newrepublic.
First, Let’s Get Rid of All the Bosses...
First, Let’s Get Rid of All the Bosses http://www. newrepublic.
whoa
is this one of the things where the zeppoles are in the...
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/650726002461556736/photo/1
@rustyk5 @kosamari @tophtucker https://twitter.
Oh god this means JavaScript is here to stay forever.
@rustyk5 @tophtucker Oh god this means JavaScript is here to stay forever.
from experience: they won't calm down until you do a...
the little hopeful pause at the end of this is stellar
i tried to share a hilarious pun with my kids but they had...
oh its an app only for iOS so this is even better
just let it happen it's the web
despite our amazing chemistry we actually hate each other...
Or not in NYC.
Or not in NYC.
I owe lots of people @PostlightAgency emails. Mea culpa....
I owe lots of people @PostlightAgency emails. Mea culpa.
aka “my book draft”
I'd like to see you in my office.
@patbits I'd like to see you in my office.
Never forget. https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/650052068254...
Never forget. https://twitter.
A gray-haired man says, “The New York Times,” and looks out...
@chrisbeha A gray-haired man says, “The New York Times,” and looks out a rainy window, shaking his head. Could be 1890, 1930, or today.
Since all the animals in Peppa Pig live on these very...
Since all the animals in Peppa Pig live on these very specific hills I keep thinking it somehow connects to ancient Rome. Pompey Pig!
The dog, the 4-year-old, and the dog's wife all have the...
The dog, the 4-year-old, and the dog's wife all have the flu.
The dog has currently spent a day home with a four-year-old...
The dog has currently spent a day home with a four-year-old with the flu watching Peppa Pig until his eyes bleed ham.
That article was written by a small dog named Professor...
That article was written by a small dog named Professor Waggles.
“The magazine recently earned praise for devoting an issue...
“The magazine recently earned praise for devoting an issue to a 66-page essay on computer code. ” http://www.
HMMM
I'm only a little anxious
if magazines ran pharmacies for writers they'd be profitable
don't forget the kill fee
Just want to say if @Tyrangiel bets on you be ready,...
Just want to say if @Tyrangiel bets on you be ready, because next thing you know you're taking half a klonipin and going on Charlie Rose.
no it is a lie
you're going to love it
“I'd be remiss.” Oh god. “I'd be remiss if I didn't KICK...
@patbits “I'd be remiss. ” Oh god.
I totally missed this one
it looks like it smells weird
open it up just a little let a tiny bit of poop out
i had no idea who ina garten is and now i know this amazing...
i had no idea who ina garten is and now i know this amazing range of things from this amazing @Choire article https://www. eater.
The Internet of Parents Is Miserable and I Love It
oh no why did you ask
cool podcast subject
I just threatened to erase Octonauts from all of NetFlix...
I just threatened to erase Octonauts from all of NetFlix forever and the kids are asking me how.
you know what though before I had a daughter I had NO IDEA...
it's pretty good
i mean it really is just a very good overall experience...
i have been :/
i bring my best
he wanted to thank them for autumn sweater
guys relax the pope also met with yo la tengo
it makes them dads basically
i mean that's extreme but not atypical
yep
i love him. his short stories like the depressed person are...
@leahfinnegan i love him. his short stories like the depressed person are so horrible they are wonderful.
maybe it's time to broaden the definition of being a dad to...
i can't keep up antti
now i just made myself very depressed
feminine genius is distinguished by its focus on laundry
omg wait channel 36 ACTUALLY gets social media
that makes sense because he embodies the complexities and...
i mean patrick it's LIBYA
it's the mystery of our time imo
i learned it from you i think
it's fun to overlap signifiers with people like you whom...
i'm pretty stoked that twitter lets you have conversations...
begrudgingly
i put that little + after 2x because i know my readership...
how can heads will roll a-trak remix have 2x+ the plays of...
how can heads will roll a-trak remix have 2x+ the plays of maps i thought that people were fundamentally good https://twitter.
seems legit https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/64921902786953...
seems legit https://twitter.
would GLADLY have taken that
gonna be five days of rain now
I mean it's no weirder than milk?
@KelseyLK I mean it's no weirder than milk?
I'm mostly over my flu.
I'm mostly over my flu.
At their school I learned that early drop off was cancelled...
At their school I learned that early drop off was cancelled for tomorrow from 12pt type on a tiny piece of paper posted on a bulletin board.
Then they wouldn't walk in rain boots so I carried them...
Then they wouldn't walk in rain boots so I carried them most of a half mile while Coney Island Avenue stared.
My four year old daughter insisted I cut her pants into...
My four year old daughter insisted I cut her pants into shorts and I just realized I am wearing the legs as armbands. https://twitter.
Using a plastic knife my four-year-old son sliced a cheese...
Using a plastic knife my four-year-old son sliced a cheese stick like a banana, put it on his corn flakes, and ate that.
this is very strong thank you
oh interesting
What is #jjho?
@indiemaiden @patbits What is #jjho ?
hmmmm
do they write the script now too
that image is rough stuff
the only power move is to take responsibility and sell the...
The form of these posts is horrible always. They should be...
@joeljohnson The form of these posts is horrible always. They should be interviews or show up a year after closing.
And good night to the super blood old lady whispering...
And good night to the super blood old lady whispering “hush.
fair
leah no
Wow this moon. https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/64831754896...
Wow this moon. https://twitter.
whoa
oh my god i can only imagine
“oh. these are more of a summer apple than a fall apple.”
@sixfoot6 “oh. these are more of a summer apple than a fall apple.
“it's fine, totally fine”
no no these grains are fine
oh my god where do you even start
i just need to check what the five additional grains are
the best is when you bring it home and it's like, "oh, 21...
oh my god what is the sudden pause thing that happens in...
was
it was also like, requested specifically due to bad cold,...
Fact: Every currently active dad has at least five pictures...
Fact: Every currently active dad has at least five pictures of grocery products and drugstore shelves on his phone right now.
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/648190527523958784/photo/1
@sixfoot6 https://twitter.
i have never purchased the correct cough syrup not once
these Hiroshi Sugimoto photos of Italian theaters are...
these Hiroshi Sugimoto photos of Italian theaters are amazing #Italy " target="_blank" rel="noopener">http://www. nytimes.
did you get the right kind of milk
sigh
It's like for every engineer you get two QA and two data...
@jackrusher It's like for every engineer you get two QA and two data scientists to measure their work.
oh god yeah you can see the emerging patterns here...
@jackrusher oh god yeah you can see the emerging patterns here https://about. twitter.
yeah i mean plus android fragmentation, plus ad network...
i mean it's a lot but it's like, how many are like, writing...
and zero writers
sure just do it on top of AWS using any one of the...
“bizarre to need two thousand software engineers for...
“bizarre to need two thousand software engineers for something whose functionality is as simple as twitter. ” — https://news.
16 years to go!
@sixfoot6 16 years to go!
hacker news is pretty sure twitter should only need like...
hacker news is pretty sure twitter should only need like 100 engineers max https://news. ycombinator.
in the back by the tree?
@bn2b in the back by the tree?
“no one has found an undoubted trace fossil of dinosaur...
“no one has found an undoubted trace fossil of dinosaur vomit yet – but that doesn’t mean they aren’t out there” http://esciencecommons. blogspot.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0qAuqq1LFnU
@mariabustillos @leahfinnegan https://www. youtube.
I WOULD love to see Robert DeNiro as a crazy-coot old VC...
I WOULD love to see Robert DeNiro as a crazy-coot old VC out for one more raise, call the movie REVENUE DRIVER or MIDNIGHT RUN RATE.
true!
@JPaskin @leahfinnegan true!
post-libertarianism can wear you out but in other news u2...
“Silicon Valley shld look beyond itself & act more on...
@leahfinnegan @mariabustillos “Silicon Valley shld look beyond itself &amp; act more on issues like education, health care &amp; refugee crisis.
90% of the time it would just be pill bottles and melon...
it's hard enough for publishing maria also what's in YOUR...
@mariabustillos @leahfinnegan it's hard enough for publishing maria also what's in YOUR handbag?
okay google how do i mercy-kill the part of myself that...
wait Janet you like the METS?
@bizboyle @Mets @JPaskin @business wait Janet you like the METS?
hhahahahah yeah perfect “can we bump the aids activist and...
Could we just call them “vanities.” “Did the Bono vanity go...
@leahfinnegan Could we just call them “vanities. ” “Did the Bono vanity go to pages?
is there a term of art for the things that important...
there will be so many things that are much, much sadder by...
sent https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/647841222422360064/ph...
@_dairema @leahfinnegan sent https://twitter.
i'm sending you a google calendar alert for 2035 for when...
a rose for purity
useful pope context https://medium.com/matter/franciss-holy-...
useful pope context https://medium.
Anyway it will be fun!
@viewsourceconf Anyway it will be fun!
I read this as “the web, today.” And had a huge panic...
@viewsourceconf I read this as “the web, today. ” And had a huge panic attack that I wasn't in Portland.
that was a special case and hilarious but nah they...
MeFi is great links, grisly threads
Pretty great week for Pope bon mots.
Pretty great week for Pope bon mots.
I mean, right?
I mean, right?
podcasts
The best part of waking up/is Advil.
The best part of waking up/is Advil.
Alexis Hi!
@alexismallen Alexis Hi!
but 20 years
nah
slightly different yet still accurate
Ilovenewyork
Next door during the @sfpc lectures there is a sort of...
Next door during the @sfpc lectures there is a sort of weird orgasm workshop with constant fingering and yelling. This is real.
And it is normal.
And it is normal.
It is genuinely life-affirming to be in a place where...
It is genuinely life-affirming to be in a place where people are actively trying to figure out poetry and computation @sfpc .
just buy it its cool and the dude is cool
EVERYONE STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING AND READ THIS NOW...
EVERYONE STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING AND READ THIS NOW http://www. npr.
this is really true
i like to do my crowd work on twitter before speaking at...
what's your favorite meme sir? tub girl? what about you...
what's your favorite meme sir? tub girl?
what's the deal with airline food chain supply systems...
who here has a pet what about you miss oh a cockatiel does...
and now a reading from ephesians
i can run i can i can
for example not many people know i grew up the child of a...
the whole event is three hours and part of me wants to go...
dammit
USEFUL
banana suit
andrew for god's sake
guys i'm talking at @sfpc tonight and i guess i could trot...
it's like anything in that it's super-easy in theory and...
“Obviously, the feral cats are going to spread the fuck...
@patbits @voraciousbrain “Obviously, the feral cats are going to spread the fuck out, rapidly. ” !!!
but we still need to get that link
sounds like a rough morning
i mean all audiences are fake what matters is that you are...
wait are you the one that isn't PJ?
@AGoldmund @katienotopoulos @eventi wait are you the one that isn't PJ?
it's amazing you can keep it moist given how many sick...
there's really no CMS designed to serve under 500 pageviews...
Thank you! That's good to hear. I figured, it's...
@christopheredi Thank you! That's good to hear.
I'm confused, is it actually a podcast or do you just...
@eventi @katienotopoulos I'm confused, is it actually a podcast or do you just record the weekly standups of the Loser Team?
And thanks yes, this is such a good team.
@riordan And thanks yes, this is such a good team.
As long as they will have me. I mean writing has ALWAYS...
@riordan As long as they will have me. I mean writing has ALWAYS been on the side of consulting, it's just now on the side of Postlight.
I was able to do it by using the time that I saved by never...
@katienotopoulos I was able to do it by using the time that I saved by never appearing on your podcast.
The saddest part of playing the videogame Brooklyn Trail is...
The saddest part of playing the videogame Brooklyn Trail is when Madison dies of measles because she wasn't vaccinated.
You have died from a lack of espresso—Brooklyn Trail
i can't wait until the oregon trail remix
wow joe
wow this guy is about to become really famous...
wow this guy is about to become really famous http://gothamist. com/2015/09/23/dobro_colonizer_underappreciated.
it can happen to you!
@bn2b it can happen to you!
yeah exactly also my old thoughts are often better than my...
nah those guys were just trying to shut down the best part...
i got one that had 300 RTs to over 1000 RTs the other day,...
carefully
seriously it's the best thing to do on twitter
dammit patrick
I updated the first graf. It's a fair crticism!
@Lee_Ars I updated the first graf. It's a fair crticism!
And we'd be like, great, let's put 15-20 really great...
@Lee_Ars And we'd be like, great, let's put 15-20 really great people on it and get you exactly that in about 18 months.
I need the API, the rights management, user management, a...
@Lee_Ars I need the API, the rights management, user management, a custom CMS, Android, iOS, Android, and web apps.
ha. okay. see the part where we built beatport and...
@Lee_Ars ha. okay.
oh they all have bugs
okay (sadly takes off blazer and sweater, puts on a...
i don't really have it but what the hell
it's not awkward thank you very much please visit us any...
oh we have an amazing remote team
this is very useful where do you come down on...
I know they are stellar. @darrenhoyt and @mciarlo did our...
@joshuatopolsky I know they are stellar. @darrenhoyt and @mciarlo did our identity they rocked it.
38 hubots
oh no i've been consulting for more than a decade, I...
Honestly, Frank? I think you're just more naturally polite....
@frank_chimero Honestly, Frank? I think you're just more naturally polite.
We can have a polite-off.
@frank_chimero We can have a polite-off.
EXACTLY
I made a solemn vow to myself that I would not type the...
I made a solemn vow to myself that I would not type the words “incredibly excited” under any circumstances and I kept my vow.
Good morning! We launched our platform/product agency last...
Good morning! We launched our platform/product agency last night.
my strategy is ivy on bass and abe on drums
oh god oh god
listen we all must make sacrifices
I mean you could merge 90% of the thinkpieces.
I mean you could merge 90% of the thinkpieces.
It would simplify everything if we just correlated new...
It would simplify everything if we just correlated new generations of humans to iOS releases. “The iOS9 generation is the easiest yet.
that's one of those situations where there's no comparison....
@bgcarlisle that's one of those situations where there's no comparison. "It sounded like a jackhammer outside my window" is simile endgame.
At first you're like how did the children get harmonicas...
At first you're like how did the children get harmonicas and then you just are like well these are the facts now.
Twin four-year-olds at breakfast with harmonicas. How did...
Twin four-year-olds at breakfast with harmonicas. How did your morning go?
coudal partners has seen some shit
Thanks! Come visit!
@katelaurielee @richziade Thanks! Come visit!
dammit jack
Virginia! Hello! Thank you.
@virginia Virginia! Hello!
some people are never happy
paul.ford@postlight.com
@junipercanyon_ paul. ford @postlight .
contact@postlight.com works or just email me and i'll route...
@junipercanyon_ contact @postlight . com works or just email me and i'll route to HR.
If I forgot anyone tell me because I want to get good at...
@mciarlo @tinystride @closacco @darrenhoyt @mutewinter If I forgot anyone tell me because I want to get good at attribution.
Thanks to @mciarlo, @tinystride, @closacco, @darrenhoyt,...
Thanks to @mciarlo , @tinystride , @closacco , @darrenhoyt , and @mutewinter for getting our identity/ http://Postlight. com act together.
Come visit!
@tolar @richziade Come visit!
seriously @reppep is my copy editor for life
who also helped me corral What Is Code!
@theodoreross @reppep @Harpers who also helped me corral What Is Code!
you would become more powerful than i can even imagine
oh we need all kinds of people don't hesitate to get in...
i love opportunity!
@reppep i love opportunity!
I'M CURRENTLY WRITING THE BOOK there were circumstances.
@reppep I'M CURRENTLY WRITING THE BOOK there were circumstances.
leah nothing would piss off men more than if you learned to...
I wrote about co-founding Postlight here:...
I wrote about co-founding Postlight here: https://posts. postlight.
The domain is still propagating but if you see the...
The domain is still propagating but if you see the http://POSTLIGHT. com spelled in cartoon 3D dragons that's the OLD site.
My friend @richziade and I launched an agency to build...
My friend @richziade and I launched an agency to build great platforms and great experiences: http://Postlight. com https://twitter.
fuck it, i'll commit to the next 20 years of mocking and...
Racism is the one religion that never takes a holiday.
Racism is the one religion that never takes a holiday.
Here Is Postlight
Postlight was founded by Richard Ziade and me, Paul Ford. We’re a big company — nearly 40 people — for our age (zero years old). We are a team of ...
Here Is Postlight
Our identity was created by Mike Ciarlo and Darren Hoyt of Postlight. Here Is Postlight Great web platforms, great experiences P ostlight was founded by Richard Ziade and me, Paul Ford.
Really digging these archives https://twitter.com/ftrain/sta...
Really digging these archives https://twitter. com/ftrain/status/273058973685538817?
this is an EXCELLENT website
goddam it patrick
he is so cruel
Janet wgy
Janet wgy did you give our children harmonica s
nothing
Why do we do this to ourselves?
Why do we do this to ourselves?
oh come ON we have gone from tamagotchis to like half the...
I mean pizza rat when you think about it is all of us.
I mean pizza rat when you think about it is all of us.
Why is the pizza rat named Paul...
Why is the pizza rat named Paul http://www. newyorker.
i would read that
i dunno i don't read much literary fiction because i don't...
sometimes I think a lot of people hate Franzen because they...
“you're” is not a valid atom
well right every media object is software and every media...
And you'd always be risking the immediacy and growth of the...
@sixfoot6 And you'd always be risking the immediacy and growth of the ad-funded product.
that's the thing. you'd need to bake it into product and...
@sixfoot6 that's the thing. you'd need to bake it into product and platform strategy from day -120 or so.
i didn't think you were dismissive!
@sixfoot6 i didn't think you were dismissive!
plus the textbook people are smart enough and will pay more...
it'd be much easier to build it on top of an ebook delivery...
oh i'm sure i'm not—but that's a hard pivot given the...
it's an agency, we build you your software
this week
No one lets me do ANYTHING.
No one lets me do ANYTHING.
If I was to launch an explainer site I would bake in a...
If I was to launch an explainer site I would bake in a long-term stealth design to own a large portion of the textbook industry.
whoa
this is probably the correct way to go
wow this writer is unbelievably well-informed about the...
@indiemaiden @patbits wow this writer is unbelievably well-informed about the cuckold fetish community.
David Cameron can do what he wants in private but I'll...
David Cameron can do what he wants in private but I'll never again be able to hear this song from 1994 the same way https://youtu.
There's nothing wrong with that. They pay writers and can...
There's nothing wrong with that. They pay writers and can do what they want with their articles.
Wired, a digital lifestyle magazine for older men, is...
Wired, a digital lifestyle magazine for older men, is embargoing articles unless you use iOS9 http://www. wired.
oh cool just getting my coffee checking out this morning's...
lawS and sausages I mean
niiice
Wow today we learned a little more about how both law AND...
Wow today we learned a little more about how both law AND sausages are made.
Ad networks already do all the micro-targeted content...
Ad networks already do all the micro-targeted content delivery our future CMSes are supposed to do. Screw it, let the middlemen win.
We keep trying to make online publications for ad-like with...
We keep trying to make online publications for ad-like with native, etc. Why don't we just start creating publications inside ad units?
Doubleclick for Advertisers
I mean I'd need to sell ads.
@timbray I mean I'd need to sell ads.
http://MediumRectangle.com could be a whole magazine in...
http://MediumRectangle. com could be a whole magazine in 300x250 ad unit form, distributed as an ad.
I own http://mediumrectangle.com if anyone has any ideas....
I own http://mediumrectangle. com if anyone has any ideas.
For some reason people cannot stop generating content, no...
For some reason people cannot stop generating content, no matter how little you pay them. That's where your opportunity comes in.
Oh I assumed YOU formed your opinions MANY years ago.
@tolar Oh I assumed YOU formed your opinions MANY years ago.
The one thing to know about publishing is that it's a...
The one thing to know about publishing is that it's a terrible business, but it's a great business to build your business on top of.
Programmers now forming opinions about the publishing...
Programmers now forming opinions about the publishing business: Welcome to the rich tradition of everyone having opinions about publishing.
I don't read the comments
Check out @ftrain's Tweet: https://twitter.com/ftrain/status...
Check out @ftrain 's Tweet: https://twitter. com/ftrain/status/193396715779395584?
people are basically kind and I can figure this out
roset is cool
i just drank so much roset
THAT's amore!
@theodoreross @maureenflaherty @anildash THAT's amore!
“When the cat does great harm / To your Chesterfield's arms...
@Emdashes @anildash @nickoneill “When the cat does great harm / To your Chesterfield's arms / Das Upholstery!
♬ When you injure the vicar / With cheaply caned wicker /...
♬ When your ottoman's torn/And your neighbors show...
When I pass this I think of songs, like, ♬When the foam in...
When I pass this I think of songs, like, ♬When the foam in your chair/Starts to show signs of wear/Das Upholstery! ♬ https://twitter.
man b3ta is still pretty great this is from an image...
man b3ta is still pretty great this is from an image challenge on “british superheroes” http://www. b3ta.
champ shake
oh god oh god via http://mlkshk.com/user/artwells...
oh god oh god via http://mlkshk. com/user/artwells https://twitter.
those look wonderful
oh yeah in liar's poker i think they actually had a budget...
GODDAMMIT BEN
my wife just gave me a clutching toy and puts it my hands...
@leahfinnegan @jamiekeiles @caseyjohnston @petersterne my wife just gave me a clutching toy and puts it my hands http://www. shopgreendesign.
I already have a home clutching toy that my wife gave me so...
I already have a home clutching toy that my wife gave me so i'd stop breaking things http://www. shopgreendesign.
i actually have a little wooden sun that is known as...
@emckean i actually have a little wooden sun that is known as "daddy's" that I can chew and touch http://www. shopgreendesign.
i mean TTL on a stainless steel mass-produced pen until...
oh wow it's immediately apparent that the problem is not...
i seriously won't buy one because of the risk
no see you guys I need GOOD MOUTH FEEL but resistant to...
no see you guys I need GOOD MOUTH FEEL but resistant to destruction like this just looks like it would hurt https://lypen.
in moments of extreme stress (i.e. daily) i bite through...
@caseyjohnston @jamiekeiles @petersterne in moments of extreme stress (i. e.
Serious question: Is there a chewproof pen?
Serious question: Is there a chewproof pen?
i rip them apart like a drunken wolverine and when i see...
is there a chewproof pen actually wait i need to ask this...
you really have to give it to the sun
that's great i'll just write it that morning
so that i could mute you
i just did
blocked
oh wow it's been years they are amazing
smh
get the pope a tasty-klair
why do you hate the pope chris?
@montchr why do you hate the pope chris?
i mean really it was one of the places where touchscreen...
worst part of NYC is no wawa
uh oh https://twitter.com/BuzzFeedJS/status/6434500767576678...
@schmeenarf @BuzzFeedJS uh oh https://twitter.
i hope his holiness likes stale but still somehow delicious...
i hope his holiness likes stale but still somehow delicious pretzels https://twitter.
there is no other way
Just a year and change until the next presidential election!
Just a year and change until the next presidential election!
Congratulations to sunlight on water which has had one of...
Congratulations to sunlight on water which has had one of its best months ever #crushingit . https://twitter.
I just don't want to deal with myself that much.
@hcwoodward I just don't want to deal with myself that much.
I guess I better write that keynote
needs a z
no sadly we are stuck with this timeline instead of that one
this is good work
whatever dude
this is not real but it's great anyway...
this is not real but it's great anyway http://www. b3ta.
never
he is a very gracious person
freelancing how do you fill the hours amirite
i was wrong in 2012 and i'm wrong today...
i was wrong in 2012 and i'm wrong today https://twitter.
you're welcome
did you know that the hawaiian word for "quick" is "wiki"
is it nice
it's 6 https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/445063078766718976
it's 6 https://twitter.
luke you switched to incognito mode what's wrong oh my god...
also we are a four minute walk from argot
you know who has lots of desks and conference rooms and...
i can't hear you over the sound of my binary options trading
the ONLY email that competes with that one is from Laurie...
@jimaley the ONLY email that competes with that one is from Laurie Abraham at Elle offering to babysit if I'd just get my draft in.
RIGHT! I knew it was a thing I'd seen.
@CraigPlazure RIGHT! I knew it was a thing I'd seen.
augmented reality is going to allow for actual human blocks...
no i mean that's BuzzFeed
the sad thing is that the ad people have the good content...
now block the ads in podcasts seriously mailchimp i fucking...
so many panel discussions will be born today it's wonderful
the IAB is going to do something about this just as soon as...
by the way that last tweet is 140 characters long
hm
you are a strong contender
who will the final blogger be
lolol yes
ulgh tom no one should read that novel
Soon the taptic engine will be morse-coding “Be sure to...
Soon the taptic engine will be morse-coding “Be sure to drink your Ovaltine” directly onto your thigh.
we showed those ads
I oversaw the great spatula assessment of 1998
“Cheat: It's the only way to get published.”...
“Cheat: It's the only way to get published. ” http://www.
i'm not really an editor any more except i edit a lot of...
“This could have used an editor” is a cliché that, as an...
“This could have used an editor” is a cliché that, as an editor, I hope everyone will stop using.
professor
:double_middle_finger:
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/643802904596512768/photo/1
@jennydeluxe https://twitter.
I wrote this about failed weight loss with quantified self...
I wrote this about failed weight loss with quantified self and am tweeting it again to appease the robots http://www. newrepublic.
mo made us sausages rice and peas it was great
a fridge block is better than any follow for reals
is fried chicken a sandwich
I wanted to!
@joshmillard I wanted to!
sure because the media industry is filled with self-hating...
god is fridge still tweeting can you fucking imagine
explain bread pudding
back atcha
this is spectacular oh god the teething plus food...
It's really hard to decide what to have for dinner knowing...
It's really hard to decide what to have for dinner knowing that was just published.
not compatible with centralized content platforms, sadly
You thought you hated me for giving my daughter extra money...
You thought you hated me for giving my daughter extra money but now you can hate me for being fat and believing in calories, too.
Data Helped Me Lose 100 Pounds
you are very kind. Thank you!
@multifacetedacg you are very kind. Thank you!
yes
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/345607232005734400
https://twitter.
hey @leahfinnegan mo just sent me this and i think you'll...
hey @leahfinnegan mo just sent me this and i think you'll appreciate it too http://www. buzzfeed.
Yes we do!
@shabbychef Yes we do!
yes
i guess i need to watch this for work
where can i pirate it/stream it though
if i remember it has some virtual reality scene. i never...
@leahfinnegan if i remember it has some virtual reality scene. i never saw it.
i was 20 when it came out
The Minions movie made $1 billion on a budget of $74...
The Minions movie made $1 billion on a budget of $74 million so this summer was just the beginning of our nightmare http://www. boxofficemojo.
you are welcome this tweet is incredibly kind
skittles🌈 https://vine.co/v/bY6iV6n0Ur6
skittles🌈 https://vine.
ulgh pop-up bankruptcy
Proof that growth hacking works. https://twitter.com/jordan...
Proof that growth hacking works. https://twitter.
I should just give them my routing info from my bank
Congratulations to my 30,000th follower, @SEOVaginaDeals!
Congratulations to my 30,000th follower, @SEOVaginaDeals !
AND IN THE SHEETS
you're playing a dangerous game michael
Empathy is my core value.
@rossk Empathy is my core value.
Native BrandOps
percolate call me
I mean you can really sell that as a service. “We create...
I mean you can really sell that as a service. “We create your Brand Rollout Strategy Center Using BrandOps Best Practice💲.
Actually now I'm kind of into the idea of BrandOps.
Actually now I'm kind of into the idea of BrandOps.
“Tuning Microservices for Global BrandOps...
i didn't look up it was 90000 degrees
I mean there's a command-and-control aspect here that's...
@livlab I mean there's a command-and-control aspect here that's amazing and also the testing and the secrecy.
oh god brandops is going to become a real thing because of...
oh god brandops is going to become a real thing because of @ldodds . there will be brandops summits.
LEIGH WHY DID YOU SAY THAT OUT LOUD
Right I mean I'd guess it was...5K dependencies? 100K? I...
@livlab Right I mean I'd guess it was... 5K dependencies?
noah that does not qualify as a humblebrag it's like 30,000...
That's the thing, it was secret and then it was everywhere.
@noahr That's the thing, it was secret and then it was everywhere.
Like, if the same people who did the logo rollout where in...
Like, if the same people who did the logo rollout where in charge of Plus we'd be in this very different world right now.
I went over to their NYC office and it's still on the paper...
I went over to their NYC office and it's still on the paper badges but the presentations all have the new logo.
It's everywhere at once. It's inside the search bar on my...
It's everywhere at once. It's inside the search bar on my phone in a gentle gray.
It must have been a logistical nightmare and it was carried...
It must have been a logistical nightmare and it was carried out at once. Like, it's breathtaking.
Can I talk about how the rollout of its rebrand across...
Can I talk about how the rollout of its rebrand across product families is one of the most amazing things Google's ever done?
i had to unretweet that masterwork thing because i felt...
that's a great question!
@patbits that's a great question!
right sorry
dorkwave?
@patbits dorkwave?
Patrick what is your look
with even less talking
I call this look Problemagic http://www.nytimes.com/interact...
I call this look Problemagic http://www. nytimes.
I can't hear you I'm reclining too hard.
@ftrain I can't hear you I'm reclining too hard.
The code of the express bus dads is that conversations are...
The code of the express bus dads is that conversations are purely opt-in and a two-row minimum seating distance should be observed.
oh wow this is a new kind of mormonism
families are wonderful. It works out. But it forces you to...
@kosamari families are wonderful. It works out.
You guys keep running your mouths on Facebook and I'll keep...
You guys keep running your mouths on Facebook and I'll keep giving money for reproductive health and access to abortion. Everyone wins.
I did a tally of the dumb shit people were saying about my...
I did a tally of the dumb shit people were saying about my Elle piece and when I got to 200 dumb comments I gave $200 to Planned Parenthood.
we can do the next one
sure!
@joyfuldroid sure!
please no it is always of tremendous interest and value
thank you! the thing is that once I had the idea it became...
@vcmcguire thank you! the thing is that once I had the idea it became an ethical requirement to address it regardless of outcome.
exactly!
@hoosteeno exactly!
the title of that chart is "EXCEPT WHEN IT'S JIM"
that for sure. On the left because it can be acted upon; on...
@knowtheory @jakubowskiandy that for sure.
I think you almost need a 3rd party to gather feedback,...
@jakubowskiandy I think you almost need a 3rd party to gather feedback, organize it, and save it for you, so that you don't overvalue anger.
this is a good commit https://github.com/dariusk/corpora/com...
this is a good commit https://github.
i think this also applies to releasing code or really...
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/641919608522428416/photo/1
https://twitter.
he's fine, mostly
honestly that's the funniest thing i've read all day
there's my girl
she is a true artist of the Internet...
@raganwald @katienotopoulos she is a true artist of the Internet http://www. buzzfeed.
man you point out ONE paradox of capitalism
agreed
offer to hold one for a few minutes and tell them you...
I need to listen to you Mike
the Internet
privatization of infrastructure maintenance
fat shaming
media consolidation and capitalism.
@deanpjensen media consolidation and capitalism.
food supply and migrant labor
becomes labor immediately
forgive @ftrain
god this is the perfect moment to release embarrassing...
She's actually the nicest person and she gave my children...
@PJVogt She's actually the nicest person and she gave my children stickers. But I will never appear on her podcast.
I think more people have been on it than have heard it.
@PJVogt I think more people have been on it than have heard it.
Wait you've heard it? Or were you just on it?
@PJVogt @katienotopoulos Wait you've heard it? Or were you just on it?
This is one obvious reason.
@katienotopoulos This is one obvious reason.
that was the only part that made me sad
ACCURATE
Don't hate the aggregator hate the native brand advertising...
Don't hate the aggregator hate the native brand advertising platform.
For obvious reasons, I will never appear on...
For obvious reasons, I will never appear on @katienotopoulos 's podcast.
yes they are usually really helpful. they used to 404 a lot...
@bn2b @totallyslutsky yes they are usually really helpful. they used to 404 a lot but people are using web archive links more.
because wikipedia is wonderful but also very high risk
yes they're great if you are a journalist writing about a...
more likely: overworked, young, lightly edited, making $250...
well normally their articles are unsigned. i mean it is...
@bn2b well normally their articles are unsigned. i mean it is what it is!
how well do you know the lyrics
well they need to be very careful lest she die in childbirth
good curating today patrick
I say!
@patbits I say!
this article is completely lacking in information on how...
why must impolite ruffians speak to me in rough tones
fair
second of all they have perfectly internalized the era's...
first of all why isn't it in a magazine for ladies?
@patbits first of all why isn't it in a magazine for ladies?
oh wow this article is extraordinary
Wow the Economist just made it so weird....
Wow the Economist just made it so weird. http://www.
maybe in rush to publish stuff was...journalism...scoops...
@rustyk5 @MikeIsaac @harper maybe in rush to publish stuff was... journalism...
bot I mean
its a bit maybe
wait huh
i already was tabs intern
ultimately we need to give everyone access to the drugs...
WAS ASKED
i'll adopt you but you'll need to learn javascript
yep
I wrote a piece for Elle about how I will address the wage...
I wrote a piece for Elle about how I will address the wage gap my daughter will experience (that her brother won't): http://www. elle.
that's great! thanks!
@osulop that's great! thanks!
The one true job of public relations is to stave off...
The one true job of public relations is to stave off ridicule.
also: 90% BeatPort t-shirts
I'm wearing a shirt with the RSS logo that says "I want to...
Paul...is that an off the rack blazer from Men's Wearhouse?
@robertjpetro Paul... is that an off the rack blazer from Men's Wearhouse?
can you imagine
tweetstorm forecasting is still as much art as science
Seems like tweetstorm season is over.
Seems like tweetstorm season is over.
http://mobile.nytimes.com/2015/09/11/fashion/mens-style/the-...
http://mobile. nytimes.
I can't remember specific shows but yeah it was def like,...
@jamiekeiles I can't remember specific shows but yeah it was def like, he fell in love with his proxy bride!
yeah!
@jessamyn yeah!
You know what used to get discussed a lot and used in bad...
You know what used to get discussed a lot and used in bad TV plots but hardly comes up any more? Marriage by proxy https://en.
I know & read Analog/F&SF/Asimov's—what are the...
I know &amp; read Analog/F&amp;SF/Asimov's—what are the other good sci-fi zines? Went looking ( https://weightlessbooks.
Saving for a Daughter but Not a Son: This Father Is Starting a Fund to Combat the Wage Gap
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/641002570622836737/photo/1
https://twitter.
BLOCKED
this is crazy https://youtu.be/QajyNRnyPMs
this is crazy https://youtu.
well sakes alive
“People talking to people is still how the world’s...
“People talking to people is still how the world’s standards change. ” http://www.
Cardigans soon.
Cardigans soon.
wow that looks deeply satisfying
[nods] yeah it's hot liquid garbage
I'm honestly just super nostalgic for the crazy-uncle...
@nelson @therealfitz I'm honestly just super nostalgic for the crazy-uncle Internet right now. It sucks he's broke.
he *is* the god Pan I mean—“she had looked at me and seen a...
@guydeboredom @baconmeteor he *is* the god Pan I mean—“she had looked at me and seen a god.
This situation is surprising when you consider that he the...
@guydeboredom @baconmeteor This situation is surprising when you consider that he the god Pan: http://www. catb.
whoa
i always floss too far
I have a lot of bad news for my brain.
I have a lot of bad news for my brain.
Wow, out of nowhere my brain just went, “You should walk...
Wow, out of nowhere my brain just went, “You should walk across the bridge to J&amp;R and go upstairs to the software store.
imagine our parents conceiving anyone, the damp creaking...
Is people ordering insane shit places don't have (like...
Is people ordering insane shit places don't have (like hotdogs from Chinese take-out/Band-Aids at the ice cream stand) NYC-only or global?
this extreme 1920s collection of air stunts and things...
this extreme 1920s collection of air stunts and things smashing is the best 16:27 i've seen in a while https://archive.
this is called "sleeping" you should check it out on...
at least you only have one husband
Okay so @joshuatopolsky this is a little obscure but if we...
huh
dammit
oh no I came to that by pure thievery
I just read this on the bus and learned many things about...
@tressiemcphd I just read this on the bus and learned many things about stuff I thought I'd thought about.
that's a relief
-> Maybe
i want to criticize so many things that my head is all...
hahahah never
or, if that felt to ambiguous, a “kk”
the ironic use of advertising language was fine for zine...
u did SO good tho
i hereby am going to offer criticism to everyone.
i hereby am going to offer criticism to everyone.
actually screw that i'd have to issue at least 2,000...
actually screw that i'd have to issue at least 2,000 retractions because of http://www. themorningnews.
i just listened to a podcast where people talked about my...
it'll be great :)
fair
maybe you could get a telepresence robot and hand out...
i'm NOT sad I'll miss andre?
@waxpancake @torrez i'm NOT sad I'll miss andre?
no i'm sad i won't see you, they're totally doing it forever
i'm sure you'll be funnier than darius, more relevant than...
oh fuck now i'm sad
eh it's still a good hug i'd take it
i know i'm garbage. i really want to come this year too....
@waxpancake @sixfoot6 i know i'm garbage. i really want to come this year too.
“Registration Closed”
Hi Aastha!
@_aasthab @sanarao Hi Aastha!
whoa this is amazing
no no an sva student presented this as part of the get to...
sva students hooking us up
right omg?
@sanarao right omg?
When I threw you under the bus I really hurt my back. Just...
When I threw you under the bus I really hurt my back. Just a data point.
request i do i mean
i actually had a reader writer and request I did “what are...
@jimaley i actually had a reader writer and request I did “what are databases?
actually wait this is the song right here holy shit...
actually wait this is the song right here holy shit https://hoirong. bandcamp.
i'm done writing and tweeting
The student doesn't seem to be on Twitter so I don't want...
The student doesn't seem to be on Twitter so I don't want to blow his cover.
Last night an @svaixd student quickly mentioned this band...
Last night an @svaixd student quickly mentioned this band Hoirong and HOLY CANDY APPLES CHECK THIS OUT https://soundcloud.
a brand cannot expand indefinitely
it was totally a ripped gray t torn from the finnegan look...
i re-issued that tweet so it had more intellectual property...
saw a woman wearing this on the back of a T-shirt coming...
saw a woman wearing this on the back of a T-shirt coming out of the subway and it cracked me up https://twitter.
in the 90s it seemed like jazz flute samples were going to...
http://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/an-interactive-guide-to-a...
http://www. mcsweeneys.
‘O.K., capitalism, I have seen your gaping maw, and I want...
@joshcochrane ‘O. K.
patrick you are someone who really gets what it's all about...
ulgh i'm just waiting for the “it was all very ethical we...
ulgh i'm just waiting for the “it was all very ethical we gave $10,000 in free backpacks and ideation consulting services to the homeless.
this was a good move
shut up and watch this ted talk
thank you that is actually calming
i REALLY need a cigarette right now and it's only 9:41AM...
and next, us magazine homeless edition will start running...
i just snapped my keyboard in half
I still feel like garbage about the news.
I still feel like garbage about the news.
I keep thinking about what @zeynep is saying here...
@ftrain I keep thinking about what @zeynep is saying here http://www. nytimes.
2/@MSF_USA pulled 1,600+ refugees from the water yesterday...
@ftrain 2/ @MSF_USA pulled 1,600+ refugees from the water yesterday http://www. msf.
1/The sight of a dead toddler washed onto a beach is...
@ftrain 1/The sight of a dead toddler washed onto a beach is fundamentally intolerable.
So that I could stop feeling like garbage about the news I...
So that I could stop feeling like garbage about the news I gave $250 to Doctors Without Borders this morning. http://bit.
ivf
I'm a shy person erin
home!
@colindinsmore home!
whoever was mean is fired
I'm home! Thank you for the questions. I will never answer...
I'm home! Thank you for the questions.
not anymore
sometimes when things seem, you need to that you CAN even
I secretly study Vaudeville
an incredibly mismanaged relay race
thats a relief tbh
mostly I just read the docs and went holy shit a lot
admire it?
@modernserf admire it?
xortelyou
god it would be a Spotify playlist of like, top trip hop. I...
@bn2b god it would be a Spotify playlist of like, top trip hop.
sometimes! It really is a good device.
@JeffAbbott sometimes! It really is a good device.
pepper
banan peppee aoli
theres a learning curve but they do some things sooooo well
the boutonniere
Ford fiesta
Williamsburg had started to lose its mind and I had just...
anything where they hack gpus is weirdly fascinating
god I hope the strike is over soon
bm1
a diamond in the rough
I like the new.Mexico governors mansion
@leahfinnegan I like the new.
harrisburg
I just renewed the domain. I need to get back in there....
@johnsperanza I just renewed the domain. I need to get back in there.
every time you dress neat
translucent databases 2nd ed
bm1 Brooklyn bound
I mumble and shuffle.
@mvsyyz I mumble and shuffle.
translucent databases 2nd ed
a longer bus ride so I could collect more thoughts
ohhh I thought you meant in general. The book I'm not...
@eveostay ohhh I thought you meant in general. The book I'm not reading is called Translucent Databases 2nd edition.
nah its a nerd book about databases and I have a headache...
beakause
it will always be thus
god I don't know. There are a lot of threads open and I've...
@brianvan god I don't know. There are a lot of threads open and I've cofounded a software company.
I just keep imagining the meetings at Disney where they...
@emilynussbaum I just keep imagining the meetings at Disney where they evaluated pig puppets for sexiness.
the greatest love of all because after you give good love...
@torrez the greatest love of all because after you give good love why keep going?
purity
I am sort of hoping that by starting a software development...
I like the way that trump reminds us all that the media is...
no but it will be a major part of a longer book from fsg in...
a little overwhelmed in general but optimistic over all
the wrong people usually
I've never seen either show should I?
@jangiefer @kfan I've never seen either show should I?
I love the async model, having learned it from the Clojure...
@mickeylyle I love the async model, having learned it from the Clojure port. Don't use it but like reading it.
evan
I don't want to read my book and I am on a bus. Can I...
I don't want to read my book and I am on a bus. Can I answer any questions?
kieran yours is too high concept
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Liu_Cixin
@KNF100 https://en. wikipedia.
A copy of my Businessweek issue from Taiwan has been...
A copy of my Businessweek issue from Taiwan has been secured for me, go team. https://twitter.
he's on the angry birds movie
who will play the sophons
like even the boring parts are crazy in an interesting way
the end of dark forest was pretty cool tbh i mean there is...
with a character you expect to be dead
oh yeah he could care less and in fact he starts you with...
well it's just make-believe too, people should be able to...
no i love it, takes a minute to get used to it. it's very...
@bn2b no i love it, takes a minute to get used to it. it's very chinese too, but he seems even more extreme.
medvedev
the new google logo is a radical improvement in favicon...
but i mean, each tweet is basically a medium-sized web page
this—http://www.bloomberg.com/bw/articles/2013-11-07/the-hid...
@vtlynch @fugueish this— http://www. bloomberg.
those sweatpants do look exceptionally comfortable
stellar, thank you.
@muanchiou stellar, thank you.
that's wonderful can I email you my address and give you...
@muanchiou that's wonderful can I email you my address and give you some money?
!!! (@juninaro you are off the hook altho if you got one I...
@muanchiou @gjtorikian !!!
and also just like, people don't stop talking until they...
oh wow that's an extraordinary detail
western writers are always avoiding expository dialogue...
i did just read the first two three-body problem books and...
dan is a generous writer
i don't care about books i like to read old business...
i mean i think the author must be aware of that irony...
this is paradoxical because if you were only supposed to...
this is paradoxical because if you were only supposed to read things of genius then you shouldn't read the article http://www. theguardian.
god that might actually be it
oh my
Live every day like it's Prime Day.
Live every day like it's Prime Day.
that is exceptionally kind, thank you
if there is one please do and I'll PayPal you whatever.
@juninaro if there is one please do and I'll PayPal you whatever.
Is there anyone in Taiwan who can grab me one of these?...
Is there anyone in Taiwan who can grab me one of these? https://mobile.
It'll be all right. I'm just writing about gender and...
@redkeg It'll be all right. I'm just writing about gender and class, not something truly controversial like JS frameworks.
morning matt
Two shoutouts in the layoff memo is definitely a...
Two shoutouts in the layoff memo is definitely a career... something.
I work by union square now let's get coffee!
@johnjcook I work by union square now let's get coffee!
how's work
john
Can anyone explain to me what this video intended to...
Can anyone explain to me what this video intended to convey? https://youtu.
that image is twice as offensive because she's not halal
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/638802691066626048/photo/1
@patbits https://twitter.
!!!
@jackrusher !!!
Hi! Thanks!
@zeldman @mathowie Hi! Thanks!
An Icelandic institute publishes an AI ethics guide...
An Icelandic institute publishes an AI ethics guide http://motherboard. vice.
I just don't know if I'll ever get used the ragged right...
I just don't know if I'll ever get used the ragged right future.
(@kjhealy has documented his document-generation workflow,...
( @kjhealy has documented his document-generation workflow, btw; it's really nicely considered: http://kieranhealy.
People are rightly excited by the subject of @kjhealy's...
People are rightly excited by the subject of @kjhealy 's article, “Fuck Nuance,” http://kieranhealy. org/files/papers/fuck-nuance.
you ever find yourself drifting to sleep thinking if you'd...
never forget https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/6385248378504...
never forget https://twitter.
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/638522758515818496/photo/1
https://twitter.
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/638520417272119296/photo/1
https://twitter.
can you offer me a quote
didn't end well
thank you I will point to this tweet during the trial
soon!
@artlung soon!
There is a kind of trolling indistinguishable from truth....
There is a kind of trolling indistinguishable from truth. That is where you will find me.
lol I know exactly what I'm in for
oh this is a new piece on a different subject
I'm kind of getting my dander up preemptively because when...
I'm kind of getting my dander up preemptively because when this one hits the web I am in for a world of hot shit.
I love when people go, "I'm sad for you," as if that's the...
I love when people go, "I'm sad for you," as if that's the ultimate conversation stopper. Just say “I can't tolerate disagreement” instead.
Pissing someone off so much they stand up from their...
Pissing someone off so much they stand up from their magazine and Google you and send an email is a magnificent feeling though.
I had an email exchange with the luxury vacation woman and...
I had an email exchange with the luxury vacation woman and I don't think we're chill.
I take it seriously.
@knguyen I take it seriously.
oh wow that would be great to read
patrick why don't you write about it
“I am so offended by your article that I had to email you...
“I am so offended by your article that I had to email you despite being on a luxury vacation at the moment.
no one is like me
agile with grievances
It's an impressive span of time but no—I procrastinated and...
@Coburnicus It's an impressive span of time but no—I procrastinated and flopped around for a full year from the initial assignment.
Do the VMAs have rules about filibusters?
Do the VMAs have rules about filibusters?
Camus was a good writer but a lousy meteorologist.
Camus was a good writer but a lousy meteorologist.
It turns out this summer is not actually invincible.
It turns out this summer is not actually invincible.
perfect use of the platform
fyi if you are a serious artist you number things starting...
Play Flappo Bird in an emulated Atari 2600 in your web...
Play Flappo Bird in an emulated Atari 2600 in your web browser using only the CONTROL key: https://archive. org/details/flappobird https://twitter.
oh god gabe why would you SAY this out loud
no judgments you're still a good person
god is there anything more shameful than the contents and...
hahahaa whoa
travel is hard because i have little kids but pbgh is kinda...
@abrennr @anetv @mcburton travel is hard because i have little kids but pbgh is kinda close, too, so... maybe!
lemme know if i can help or answer questions, i like...
longer, narrower, more blue but the same level of...
I love to emulate things on Hercules tbh...
@joshu @mattcutts I love to emulate things on Hercules tbh http://www. hercules-390.
“I think we can knock this out in two hours.”
@dbreunig “I think we can knock this out in two hours.
That's the thing that wrecks my brain.
@dbreunig That's the thing that wrecks my brain.
It has at least ten times that many users though.
@bn2b It has at least ten times that many users though.
I let that go but the omission of Haiku is glaring.
@paulkruczynski I let that go but the omission of Haiku is glaring.
“Do you like innovative features?” “Just eat this broth...
“Do you like innovative features? ” “Just eat this broth it's all your system can handle right now.
Right, the Kinja strategy.
@bn2b Right, the Kinja strategy.
To be clear, I opted in on taking a survey and the survey...
To be clear, I opted in on taking a survey and the survey worked, my issue is we need to rescue the people who wrote it and help them.
Why does it DO that
I know but it amuses me for real.
@bn2b @torrez I know but it amuses me for real.
Something with apps.
@alexismallen Something with apps.
I didn't think a question that profound could have an...
@bn2b I didn't think a question that profound could have an answer but the more I think about it the more I think the answer is Windows 10.
I mean, I *LIKE* interacting seamlessly.
@torrez I mean, I *LIKE* interacting seamlessly.
A person had an opportunity to connect with millions of...
A person had an opportunity to connect with millions of people through a paid brand engagement survey on https://Twitter. com, but then...
When I choose an operating system it's because I care about...
When I choose an operating system it's because I care about innovative features that I can interact with seamlessly. Because I am not human.
Oh heeeeeeere's what they are thinking....
Oh heeeeeeere's what they are thinking. https://twitter.
Twitter asked me this question in a “brand survey” what in...
Twitter asked me this question in a “brand survey” what in God's name are they thinking. https://twitter.
is that canon
but yeah it's a problem...no idea how to solve it
@brookinc but yeah it's a problem...
My book, in a year!
@brookinc My book, in a year!
lol yes my god
it goes really well with Look Who's Talking Too
exactly!
@mbloomstein exactly!
a big part of yacht rock is that when you pull back the...
saying steely dan is yacht rock is like saying rosemary's...
i just had a ten minute debate with myself about whether...
There are so many ways this could really work at the...
@raganwald There are so many ways this could really work at the proxy/VPN level and I bet we could get funding.
this is so strong
that was an excellent hint
instagram has taught me so much about airplane wings
(i was trying to remember weakerthans and remembered...
there's no salmonblaster on spotify freaking rip off
meat puppets too right?
@torrez @bn2b meat puppets too right?
At some weird meta-level JIRA controls us all.
@kenwalker At some weird meta-level JIRA controls us all.
August 25, 2015 - Breakfast
Going to go see Sean about the book. Wrote this to my doctor.
Neds Atomic Dustbin was def a good band
Or colloquially the Jesus Jones Jinx.
@bn2b Or colloquially the Jesus Jones Jinx.
In the literature this is known as the Soup Dragon...
@bn2b In the literature this is known as the Soup Dragon Conjecture.
crazy old people are the best part!
@fhwang @JackSmithIV crazy old people are the best part!
you approved the list
you're #11
remember that the stock market in your heart always has...
well here it is the worst listicle on the internet...
well here it is the worst listicle on the internet http://listovative.
It’s a response, which is kind of a story.
It’s a response, which is kind of a story.
In practice it means I compose posts on Desktop and respond on mobile.
In practice it means I compose posts on Desktop and respond on mobile. It keeps people interacting and engaged, I think.
No words are more painfully optimistic than “just send me...
No words are more painfully optimistic than “just send me what you have.
from the first story i mean
omg that dude needs to RUN
they are really responsive to customer demand
whoa this is great esp the commented bios
Thank you!
@slaterusa @richziade Thank you!
YES!!!
@zchrr @richziade YES!!!
The more I learn about assembly language the more I realize...
The more I learn about assembly language the more I realize that everything I learned about computers was not from science, but marketing.
i'm straddle generation but i like to think of myself as a...
love that guy
its sooooooooo strong
god, Evan, of course
STOP THE BITS
would absolutely do this if @cardhouse brings ducklings
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/634218617299673088/photo/1
https://twitter.
i have this sense that this particular leak will be one of...
i'm going to stop joking about ashley madison because it's...
because of you, this day was not wasted
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Denormalization
@RonRosenbaum1 https://en. wikipedia.
still loading but it's pretty big with all the unzipped...
if these database dumps are any indication people who have...
mysql import is slow enough without putting on full-text...
a lot but void appears a lot too :(
http://AshleyMadisonHacked.com redirects to...
http://AshleyMadisonHacked. com redirects to http://DadsRights.
right to be forgotten looking pretty good these days
Life is short. Hack some data.
Life is short. Hack some data.
if you like me are having a day like boiled garbage let...
if you like me are having a day like boiled garbage let this into your heart http://www. cameronsworld.
well see now there's your problem
I address that issue in the piece leah
One title was "one dad vs the patriarchy" but thank God...
One title was "one dad vs the patriarchy" but thank God it's not that any more.
tz
I have an article about parenting on page 540 of the...
I have an article about parenting on page 540 of the September Elle if anyone here reads magazines.
don't forget the O Henry esque one where they are both on...
@mattbuchanan don't forget the O Henry esque one where they are both on it.
deserved a pulitzer
you can code now
a guide to exercising your right to be forgotten...
a guide to exercising your right to be forgotten https://googlegroupsforgotten. wordpress.
used to walk by there all the time!
@sogrady @aneel used to walk by there all the time!
yeah where?
@aneel @sogrady yeah where?
dismaland looks good http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article...
dismaland looks good http://www. dailymail.
god for a minute i had the thought that larry ellison was...
god how broken is google chat tho...
@kosamari @rustyk5 god how broken is google chat tho https://twitter.
but long term it is a wonderful relief
I found buying a home made me feel young again, because for...
@jeremyzilar @oubliette I found buying a home made me feel young again, because for the 1st time in years I had no money and was scared.
hooray!
@jeremyzilar @oubliette hooray!
worth the wait
she kind of looks like maria a little
echo '127.0.0.1 https://twitter.com' | sudo tee --append...
echo '127. 0.
If I worked at Amazon I'd call my special toilet laptop a...
If I worked at Amazon I'd call my special toilet laptop a compooter.
I mean dear God Silicon Valley clean your toilet laptops.
I mean dear God Silicon Valley clean your toilet laptops.
“(I’ve never seen anyone clean their laptop after leaving...
“(I’ve never seen anyone clean their laptop after leaving the bathroom. )” $AMZN http://motherboard.
sometimes you raise the bar and sometimes the bar raises you
half empty
i only have one phone
there is an email app called privy...
there is an email app called privy http://www. producthunt.
we can make a javascript-heavy web page about putting a man...
I mean for TNR I kind of am.
@nkl I mean for TNR I kind of am.
I mean sure if that helps a journalist
there must be some mistake
orly what about THIS http://www.snorgtees.com/t-shirts/hasht...
@patbits @joshuatopolsky orly what about THIS http://www. snorgtees.
The problem with this scene is that half the people you're...
@ftrain The problem with this scene is that half the people you're interrogating are already lawyers.
Here is a list of your known associates. [Throws enormous...
@ftrain Here is a list of your known associates. [Throws enormous book with RICH PEOPLE sharpied on the cover].
She lives nearby too it totally shut me up. I should have...
@divinetechygirl She lives nearby too it totally shut me up. I should have said yes.
LISTEN TO ME WE KNOW YOU HAVE THE MONEY JUST TELL US WHERE...
@ftrain LISTEN TO ME WE KNOW YOU HAVE THE MONEY JUST TELL US WHERE IT IS.
Has anyone actually done the scene in a police station...
Has anyone actually done the scene in a police station where privilege is interrogated?
i hate the word “refection”
It was just the ultimate move. There was nowhere left for...
It was just the ultimate move. There was nowhere left for me to go, except back to my keyboard.
One editor needed me to finish a piece in a hurry and when...
One editor needed me to finish a piece in a hurry and when I explained my child-care priorities, she wrote, “great, I'll babysit.
hah
that's misandry
none of my jokes have ever been stolen :(
I like the way this is sponsored by Adobe.
I like the way this is sponsored by Adobe.
wow the listserve
Sure, Amazon has a ferocious, brutally competitive...
Sure, Amazon has a ferocious, brutally competitive corporate culture but how else do you deliver innovation on the level of Prime Day?
Also, thanks!
@ckoerner Also, thanks!
No, I totally did write this article because you suggested...
@ckoerner No, I totally did write this article because you suggested it. I've been trying to get back to your tweet all day.
FINALLY
this is me now https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/63222027205...
this is me now https://twitter.
nine minutes also the hashtag is #deathdb and the article...
nine minutes also the hashtag is #deathdb and the article is http://www. newrepublic.
why in god's name would you ever let me do this
ten minutes until I am become magazine
ten minutes to get my gifs
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/632217184442445824/photo/1
https://twitter.
waaaait a minute for an hour i can follow anyone as @tnr or...
i'm in the quogues
apparently I can give away up to 30,000 free subscriptions
i feel we should take @tnr out for a spin, right? see what...
i feel we should take @tnr out for a spin, right? see what it can do.
at noon EST i.e. in 20 mins i will become @tnr through...
at noon EST i. e.
Where Does Our Information Go After We Die?
did! I just wrote an article and parsed some fixed-width...
@barthes_simpson @tnr did!
I wrote some fun dead people stuff at...
I wrote some fun dead people stuff at http://on. tnr.
damn Michael that's just sad
The Final File
things can get provocative in a canoe
the market is coming for podca$$$ting next
everyone is in such an incredibly defensive position, they...
sure but requires a level of talent, distrib, and...
also: anyone who sees edit as a “feed” or “aggregation”...
its a cultural problem with no perfect solution which...
90% of the time gmail on web/mobile, sometimes mutt,...
4/900,000 But also I should have Freedom to Parse it's very...
@Choire @toomuchnick @anildash @caseyjohnston 4/900,000 But also I should have Freedom to Parse it's very complex.
3/90,000 the problem is that publishers keep getting pushed...
more care and strategy goes into most banners than goes...
some advertising is fine and even useful just like some...
@Choire @toomuchnick @anildash @caseyjohnston some advertising is fine and even useful just like some content c. f.
I'm not sure but I think the restructuring is about money...
@anildash I'm not sure but I think the restructuring is about money and power.
you will always be neucd to me ALSO: that book has the real...
@neuey you will always be neucd to me ALSO: that book has the real cover!
I'm pretty sure this is the exact user story they developed...
@anildash I'm pretty sure this is the exact user story they developed against.
das keyboard noisy model
i did take my mechanical keyboard on vacation
glad to be back on TOMORROW a 3rd time, talking Dipperz...
glad to be back on TOMORROW a 3rd time, talking Dipperz with @joshuatopolsky https://soundcloud.
wow you were so happy in 2005
cool you are always welcome. tbh i have no idea how i end...
@leahfinnegan cool you are always welcome. tbh i have no idea how i end up in most of the places i end up in.
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/630387485370134528/photo/1
@leahfinnegan https://twitter.
come out we have like 70000 rooms and we're roughly 200...
das keyboard with blue switches so
the LAN party don't start till I walk in...
the LAN party don't start till I walk in https://twitter.
east quogue
is it lame to bring a mechanical keyboard on vacation
oh wait i bet it's a son, that totally makes sense, all...
@bn2b oh wait i bet it's a son, that totally makes sense, all these older professors going “yeah, sure, that's fine.
the 3d illustrator has the same last name as one of the...
see here's what happened http://web.archive.org/web/20100123...
@bn2b see here's what happened http://web. archive.
I mean that cover made PERFECT sense for 1986 and then 20...
so the 1st ed came out in in 86 and got nicknamed “The...
@bn2b so the 1st ed came out in in 86 and got nicknamed “The Dragon Book” so for the 2nd they JAZZED IT UP https://twitter.
so tired
Not any more.
@gknauss Not any more.
I've been thinking about the work you can get in tech right...
I've been thinking about the work you can get in tech right now and just typed the words “byte-collar jobs” and Google returns zero results.
exactly
Green-Wood Cemetery for reals.
@PJVogt Green-Wood Cemetery for reals.
My daughter was telling me nonsense about beautiful...
My daughter was telling me nonsense about beautiful princesses so I said that Elsa poops soft-serve and that's why she sings “Let it Go.
That's really kind, thank you.
@rossdotparker That's really kind, thank you.
ooh charlene google image search for like, * landscape...
magnificent find
NICE
oh shit this'll be hard to top
is there a name for this kind of chart and is anyone...
is there a name for this kind of chart and is anyone blogging/collecting them because i love them http://www. foodtechconnect.
i'm sorry littlest hobo but science can't be stopped
Alex is a lot less cool than you'd think.
@h0h0h0 @raganwald @AGoldmund @rexroof @ehershey Alex is a lot less cool than you'd think.
“—you are guilty. Of being a dude.”...
“—you are guilty. Of being a dude.
whereas americans learn about it like, “canadians are crazy...
i'm fascinated by the littlest hobo and the way it is so...
looping in @Choire https://twitter.com/SamThonis/status/62...
looping in @Choire https://twitter.
Canadian scientists announced a five year plan to create an...
Canadian scientists announced a five year plan to create an even littler hobo.
thanks that was fun!
@ethanchiel @mariabustillos @conorgillies @joeljohnson @radioopensource @aoscott @WBUR thanks that was fun!
okay maria we're up let's do it right
oh good i'm totally looking forward
maria do you agree with everything they are saying
sup conor do you like wesbites
my license is expired
okay good it's okay i really don't know much about DFW
can you hear cool jazz
lol no i've never been to microsoft
maria are we on the radio
fair and true
whoaaaaaaa hold on a minute
the @tnr twitter takeover has been postponed so stop dming...
when they got home they looked at the handle of the car...
@negatendo @rustyk5 when they got home they looked at the handle of the car door and they found...
the haunted server only pings at night
easily dammit
it happens so easilt
I agree with this
this was cool
yeah all good
makes u think https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/628986727412...
makes u think https://twitter.
except people from maine keep taking our jobs
dude was VERY serious about his seal...
dude was VERY serious about his seal http://www. yankeemagazine.
oh
http://www.yankeemagazine.com/article/history/andre-the-seal...
http://www. yankeemagazine.
I was just on @mainecalling and now I'm taking the...
I was just on @mainecalling and now I'm taking the opportunity to learn more and educate myself about Andre the Seal.
you were so right
Thank you for letting me slide into your radio show in like...
@uberlegit @mlatsch @rustyk5 @mpbnradio @mainecalling Thank you for letting me slide into your radio show in like a thirsty rando.
in another example of jokes that became real this thread...
in another example of jokes that became real this thread ends with me going to argot studios at noon to be on mainePR https://twitter.
honestly if it works it really is a good troll
too real
feels good to be 1/7,000,000,000th of the king
i'll be honest i've had a lot of good tweets
i have some really embarrassing rusty stories to share,...
this was a good tweet
sure i have access to a landline, and argot studios is...
actually i'm available
sweet burn nick
whoa
Man, my browser has more tabs open than a bar in a rural...
Man, my browser has more tabs open than a bar in a rural town that never recovered from the transition to an information economy. I'm sorry.
i'm taking over the @TNR twitter for an hour on friday so...
we failed it's very sad
Scientists studying kids born in the 1980s discovered that...
Scientists studying kids born in the 1980s discovered that many of them grew up to become millennials.
oh come on http://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2015/08/03/pic...
oh come on http://parenting. blogs.
but they contribute to the overall quality of the product!
@flipzagging but they contribute to the overall quality of the product!
that's like 20%
whole world's gone crazy. also mentioning pandas did this:...
@schmeenarf whole world's gone crazy. also mentioning pandas did this: https://twitter.
and a panda finger puppet
it offered me art, chopsticks, and cupcake recipes
wait this thing knows me
Thanks!
@ivortossell Thanks!
it won so many things!
@schmeenarf it won so many things!
the best part of the story of the twitter bot that wins...
the best part of the story of the twitter bot that wins contests ( http://www. hscott.
this velcro song is good https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_pe...
this velcro song is good https://www. youtube.
definitely the right first step
I mean drones that spray Pepsi Mist, we will be praying for...
@caseyjohnston I mean drones that spray Pepsi Mist, we will be praying for them when the time comes.
Drone-based advertising is gonna be rough...
Drone-based advertising is gonna be rough http://www. adweek.
got yer laser pointer regulations right here NYC:...
got yer laser pointer regulations right here NYC: #New_York_City_Laser_pointer_reg " target="_blank" rel="noopener">http://www. laserpointersafety.
http://www.hardformat.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/led-zep...
@buzzspinner @jimaley @BW http://www. hardformat.
I thought that the acronym for DevOps Rules Everything...
I thought that the acronym for DevOps Rules Everything Around Me was DREAM but then I realized it was DOREAM and so that slide has to go.
that's an inspired place for a wedding reception though
59 seconds can go by so fast, but other times it can seem...
“Outside there’s a face in the window.” Iceland: #1 in...
“Outside there’s a face in the window. ” Iceland: #1 in passive-aggressive lullabies http://icelandreview.
shit's good
everyone expects me to cheer them up all the time and i...
everyone expects me to cheer them up all the time and i realized that they think i'm happy because i have cresting joy face.
this singer is intense https://open.spotify.com/track/7xceaO...
this singer is intense https://open. spotify.
Thanks!
@AlexVianaPro Thanks!
whoa
this is amazing
proto-prog influences noted so far: satie, wagner, william...
yes and i've def heard prog dudes say that they like satie
that makes perfect sense, actually. stuff with a giant...
@rrmutt that makes perfect sense, actually. stuff with a giant mythos.
right and the whole like rosetti goblin market fairytale...
i love those guys but prog is ultimately pop
oh no me too, 100%
yeah william morris and kelmscott press were totally...
oh wow TOTALLY, getting into Blake is one true thread of...
right? they aim symphonic but then get dragged down by all...
@glv @bennyfactor right? they aim symphonic but then get dragged down by all the wuthering.
Sibelius is very likely. I can also imagine, “For my mind,...
@kjhealy Sibelius is very likely. I can also imagine, “For my mind, there's no finer music to be heard than that of Gustav Theodore Holst.
i mean there was charles ives but he was pretty...
right and maybe some antiquarianism in there
maybe it needs more wizards?
@kiplet maybe it needs more wizards?
My guess: Theosophy; or maybe getting really into...
@ftrain My guess: Theosophy; or maybe getting really into https://en. wikipedia.
Before prog rock what filled the prog hole in a person? If...
Before prog rock what filled the prog hole in a person? If you had the King Crimson profile, but were 18 years old in 1910, what'd you do?
i started in here https://makerba.se/p/15js4s/whatiscode...
@tophtucker @chrisamccoy @stephcd @aubergene i started in here https://makerba.
this is a good point
asimov's unpublished fourth law is "stay the fuck out of...
right—I have 50mbit/s down in Brooklyn, basically a “free”...
wait no it belongs to @tophtucker !!!
@chrisamccoy @ChangeTip wait no it belongs to @tophtucker !!!
I would like the ability to parse 10 or 20 tb of...stuff
@jakelodwick I would like the ability to parse 10 or 20 tb of...
I like how one of the features is just “10”
“I might need 24 gigs of RAM.” FOR WHAT?
@ftrain “I might need 24 gigs of RAM. ” FOR WHAT?
browsing newegg for home servers is how i realize i have...
make sure to create your own text-tagging system
data
where does it store date
people who don't drink tap/fountain/hose are hurting...
mornin jack!
@jackrusher mornin jack!
Only Suffering Kids Will Remember
Thanks Danny. I don't want to be down on people wanting to...
@DannyGroner Thanks Danny. I don't want to be down on people wanting to learn but they should know what they're getting in to.
thanks!
@michaelrp thanks!
rowhammer comin to getcha http://motherboard.vice.com/read/r...
rowhammer comin to getcha http://motherboard. vice.
wars in the future will be fought over open source forks...
wars in the future will be fought over open source forks https://news. ycombinator.
“Put a gun to my head, and I will take the same position as...
“Put a gun to my head, and I will take the same position as Jeremy Keith. ” http://www.
god i have no idea
Friday thought: Somewhere there is a message service you...
Friday thought: Somewhere there is a message service you signed up for years ago, then forgot, filled with unread messages from old friends.
joel you are a piece of shit but you make me smile :)
“I better not buy any books you publish. This is from...
“I better not buy any books you publish. This is from someone that thinks nothing of reading a 1000 +page long book by Tom Clancy.
we have to keep it away from media
its so beautiful
Now Spotify won't load after reboot so that I can't listen...
Now Spotify won't load after reboot so that I can't listen to that Frazey Ford song again.
what IS that
To illustrate incidental joy I tried to snap a picture of...
To illustrate incidental joy I tried to snap a picture of the Manhattan Bridge, sun reflecting from the East River, but my phone crashed.
God imagine for five seconds if the apparatus of the world...
God imagine for five seconds if the apparatus of the world was designed to manufacture joy instead of mere delight, outrage, and engagement.
I'm going to get that tatooed on everything I write.
I'm going to get that tatooed on everything I write.
How amazing is the line “My joy, my joy, my joy takes...
How amazing is the line “My joy, my joy, my joy takes nothing from you” in that Frazey Ford song. https://youtu.
is it even alive?
@leahfinnegan is it even alive?
extremely good question
Check this shit out https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fbT1fCHO...
Check this shit out https://www. youtube.
I think about that every week.
@mattcutts I think about that every week.
internet comments, but yours is good too
whoa
But now I want to watch Amazing Stories again omg
oh wait it's Twilight Zone reboot
THANK YOU
80sTV: Aliens criticized our “puny” wars. Nations signed a...
80sTV: Aliens criticized our “puny” wars. Nations signed a peace accord.
EXACTLY
It does seem like we've set future historians up to think...
It does seem like we've set future historians up to think we're assholes.
My favorite part of a sci-fi movie is when the alien looks...
My favorite part of a sci-fi movie is when the alien looks at a montage of human history and says, “why... are you...
“Sheesh, Historian.JohnX-39 why are you always sobbing?”...
“Sheesh, Historian. JohnX-39 why are you always sobbing?
i wonder if historians of the 2010s will get incredibly sad...
i wonder what citizens of the future will make of the...
turns out people in disqus threads have strong opinions...
turns out people in disqus threads have strong opinions about coding boot camps http://onpoint. wbur.
whoa that is some comment thread
This is a good and welcomed response.
@quinnnorton This is a good and welcomed response.
DAMMIT what other hilarious puns are out there unobserved
holy shit dude i never noticed
The thing about http://Recurse.com that sticks out is it...
The thing about http://Recurse. com that sticks out is it focuses on PROJECTS https://www.
I mean it took them TWELVE YEARS to mismanage PayPal
If you heard me on @OnPointRadio today...
If you heard me on @OnPointRadio today ( http://onpoint. wbur.
yeah I mean I think there are like earnest programs and...
i mean to the point of being sort of overwhelmed and...
sure my email is ford@ftrain.com
@jpmello sure my email is ford @ftrain .
YESSSSSS
omg
I know
I just thought it was like a game they played that was...
ashley this is my process
I just realized that “The most dangerous game” is a play on...
I just realized that “The most dangerous game” is a play on “game.
Just in general the Facebook sticker situation is really...
@leahfinnegan Just in general the Facebook sticker situation is really outstanding.
You know what's cool? Four BILLION Seasons.
@mattbuchanan You know what's cool? Four BILLION Seasons.
how cute is that daisy tho!
@leahfinnegan how cute is that daisy tho!
God isn't dead, but he is driving an Uber.
God isn't dead, but he is driving an Uber.
sup
I do have an answer, but I don't have all the answers.
@ericbuth @iaincollins I do have an answer, but I don't have all the answers.
it's actually all apps now
This is great perspective, thank you.
@mxngyn This is great perspective, thank you.
Nerds who hire nerds: What do you think about boot camps? I...
Nerds who hire nerds: What do you think about boot camps? I get asked this a lot and was asked to talk on the radio about it.
Not just WONTFIX but WOOOOOOOOOOOOOONTFIX.
Not just WONTFIX but WOOOOOOOOOOOOOONTFIX.
ulgh jim
feels like we might need to order a bunch of keyboards and...
if only there was a sound associated with standing desks
frankly this is a brilliant idea
it might be the ultimate in service podcasting
can a future episode of tomorrow just be people typing at...
hmm i might be asking for something impossible i think i...
thanks for your executive leadership
joel i have a noise issue with my das keyboard S; i just...
@joeljohnson @joshuatopolsky joel i have a noise issue with my das keyboard S; i just tried it out at work. what's a good compromise?
works fine
well the thing to understand is that what you normally...
sometimes i just think of them singing wiggle it and i get...
wow that reminds me of https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AYFD1...
@patbits wow that reminds me of https://www. youtube.
So @brunohaid is trying to create nerdlife/architecture as...
So @brunohaid is trying to create nerdlife/architecture as a subscription service @brunohaid /as-we-may-live-b2f9b42b04f" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium. com/ @brunohaid /as-we-may-live-b2f9b42b04f I wish I was 25.
that guy
see these words together are all great
good thinking greg
can't find my red horns but sure
god that's entirely accurate
Thank you!
@rasmusthaarup Thank you!
right. wintergreen was a good name. i keep wishing there...
@RitaJKing right. wintergreen was a good name.
i'm going to bed now. i've removed twitter from my phone in...
i'm going to bed now. i've removed twitter from my phone in order to limit my exposure to attentagens.
did you guys ever build a laser
just hanging with some chill friends #727
definitely
nicely done
sometimes i think sade is what steely dan wanted to be
i've never seen deadwood is it good
try to imagine a world without sade. you cannot because it...
try to imagine a world without sade. you cannot because it would not be our world.
Of course we can, John, and made from obscure metals.
@gruber Of course we can, John, and made from obscure metals.
The first rule of Nomic Club is that the rules of Nomic...
The first rule of Nomic Club is that the rules of Nomic Club are mutable https://en. wikipedia.
Nomic Club!
@tcarmody Nomic Club!
That made me think of the phrase “quiet tweetstorm” and...
That made me think of the phrase “quiet tweetstorm” and that made me think of Sade and that made me think of https://twitter.
4/4 This has been my idea for creating ad-hoc secret...
4/4 This has been my idea for creating ad-hoc secret societies with a naming strategy that encourages social recurrences.
3/4 If you need to meet more often you can just call it...
3/4 If you need to meet more often you can just call it "The 27. " And so forth.
2/4 I think the right thing to do is just name it for the...
2/4 I think the right thing to do is just name it for the date. "The July 27 Society.
1/4 I had this thought: What if you decided one day to...
1/4 I had this thought: What if you decided one day to create a secret society with no particular purpose, just to create one?
guys when i say whatever on twitter and you reply “WHAT IS...
guys when i say whatever on twitter and you reply “WHAT IS [WHATEVER]?
I cannot, cannot, cannot stop thinking about this moment...
I cannot, cannot, cannot stop thinking about this moment during the Businessweek talent show on Friday: https://twitter.
Right that piece is among my favorite Finnegan things.
@mariabustillos @leahfinnegan Right that piece is among my favorite Finnegan things.
Leah Finnegan is incredibly talented and also the only...
Leah Finnegan is incredibly talented and also the only writer in America who is actually funny. https://twitter.
THIS JOKE IS CREATIVE COMMONS LICENSED...
THIS JOKE IS CREATIVE COMMONS LICENSED https://creativecommons. org/licenses/by-nc-nd/4.
http://www.w3.org/TR/emotionml/
@kosamari http://www. w3.
you deserved it
oh god are those teeth it's coming so fast
and cache invalidation
so many hours sent straight to hour heaven
oh god NORAD is entirely powered by WSDL isn't it
yeah i mean imagine that my god
i have two das keyboards, one is for quiet, thoughtful...
Ulgh why did you REMIND me of this i'm old enough to...
i mean when we complain about the web we lost we should...
i mean when we complain about the web we lost we should also be grateful about the web we lost http://www. w3.
“The operations&messages are described abstractly,...
July 27, 2015 - Lunch
Food Qty Calories Chips, All! Natural!
why is there no single consistent API for office chair...
whoa https://medium.com/matter/table-of-contents-5b3519e1ffb...
whoa https://medium.
You must be thinking of “Vinegar Hill” by The Strawbs
Highline didn't exist when I wrote Michael!
@jacqui Highline didn't exist when I wrote Michael!
it gets shorter
July 27, 2015 - Breakfast
Food Qty Calories Bacon, 1 slice 3 138 Bagel, 1 NYC-sized bagel 360 Cheese, American, 1 slice 60 Coffee, black, 1 oz. 12 0 Egg, large 90 Milk, 1 percent, 1 c.
Looks like next week we'll finally find out whether...
Looks like next week we'll finally find out whether blogging is journalism.
i just can imagine the conversation about including that...
wikipedia come on https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/62546841...
wikipedia come on https://twitter.
WORD. (camp).
@jedstoneham WORD. (camp).
more like ethics in LAME journalism
THIS CHAT IS OFF THE RECORD
if too much voice was perceived as a sign of thirst;...
@mariabustillos if too much voice was perceived as a sign of thirst; de-socialization of social media.
true, if it became deeply uncool to have more than 5K...
@mariabustillos true, if it became deeply uncool to have more than 5K followers, for example, that would be powerful.
which is currently anathema to conversation platform...
hard to do when so many points can be scored by pointing...
oh wow I actually put that PDF up on the website after he...
Takes decades before they'll let you.
@amandayaggy @rustyk5 @mariabustillos Takes decades before they'll let you.
Likely true! I spent the morning reading British Railway...
@toomuchnick @mariabustillos Likely true! I spent the morning reading British Railway articles which have been anoraked to death.
Not for lack of yearning.
@mariabustillos Not for lack of yearning.
I guess my thesis is that better and more subtle tools...
@mariabustillos I guess my thesis is that better and more subtle tools would help amplify them, but then again: Wikipedia infighting.
Right, you see it with conversations online, the desire to...
@mariabustillos Right, you see it with conversations online, the desire to get to a place of total, unimpeachable orthodoxy.
Unless they patiently work on their stuff for 20 years.
@mariabustillos Unless they patiently work on their stuff for 20 years.
Well they won't be promoted, either. They will never bring...
@mariabustillos Well they won't be promoted, either. They will never bring in the raw numbers.
It turns out that tribality extends to every aspect of...
@mariabustillos It turns out that tribality extends to every aspect of every subject.
I think it's the primary cause of the situation. We write...
@mariabustillos I think it's the primary cause of the situation. We write in a defensive mode about EVERYTHING now, not just politics.
Getting quotes isn't enough; we need drama and a take....
@mariabustillos Getting quotes isn't enough; we need drama and a take. Because we've lost trust in rhetoric and the audience.
The whole thing is broken in such a way that a journalist...
@mariabustillos The whole thing is broken in such a way that a journalist must violently perform expertise in order to be seen as credible.
It's the horrible insistence on total knowledge that does...
@mariabustillos It's the horrible insistence on total knowledge that does this. You're not allowed to say, Reader, I do not know.
there was a long minute but now he thinks this video is...
twin toddlers dancing to the new wilco...
twin toddlers dancing to the new wilco https://instagram.
ditmas tho?
@RachelFersh ditmas tho?
wAIT what did u name it i'm confused
nowhere is safe
sigh
at least the video is people riding horses instead of like...
yeah we'll just make the best of it
damn shame
is there room in your den
rip ditmas http://ditmasparkcorner.com/blog/art-music/mumfor...
rip ditmas http://ditmasparkcorner.
When I see a US startup with a Japanese-sounding name I...
When I see a US startup with a Japanese-sounding name I assume it was started by children who secretly wanted to call it PIKACHU HOLDINGS.
I say “like” so much it shows up in promotional teaser...
I say “like” so much it shows up in promotional teaser graphics. https://twitter.
umm how is that jermaine's jeep mix of creep asking for a...
wow that's a lot of jeep mixes
can outsiders attend the talent show?
can outsiders attend the talent show?
sometimes i get sad that my children will never know what...
(I just realized that might seem kind of teasing; it wasn't...
Whoa this tweet makes perfect sense whether you are talking...
@raganwald Whoa this tweet makes perfect sense whether you are talking about JavaScript OR basic human rights.
i just feel like such garb when it happens
Haha, yes. For you, "\"
@kirschsubjudice Haha, yes.
the eternal moment before you can bring yourself to look...
What Can We Learn From Ashley Madison?
Paul Ford examines the Ashley Madison hack and online information security challenges.
Sad but also got me listening to Negativland again and his...
@shabbychef Sad but also got me listening to Negativland again and his work was amazing.
y always
more important than anything else i provide
god actually i spelled streetcart streetcar there's a lot...
i reposted that last tweet because i spelled streetcar...
cartoon idea: streetcart, vendor in a suit, sign says...
cartoon idea: streetcart, vendor in a suit, sign says "influence"—he's an influence peddler. i'm actually not using twitter much these days.
argh streetcart
cartoon idea: streetcar, vendor in a suit, sign says...
cartoon idea: streetcar, vendor in a suit, sign says "influence"—he's an influence peddler. i'm actually not using twitter much these days.
You're right; I'm terrible.
@iano You're right; I'm terrible.
yep
Take these three statements: They represent a complete...
@iano Take these three statements: They represent a complete thought; they refer to one thing; and yet—they are but one sentence.
shld be mdash :/?
@iano shld be mdash :/?
Correspondence
Correspondence I have 1,200 emails to answer right now about things I’ve written. They are making me nervous so I’ll write about them.
From Manhattan, walk across the Brooklyn Bridge to Brooklyn.
From Manhattan, walk across the Brooklyn Bridge to Brooklyn. Take a right, then a right through the park, then get on the A train to go back to Manhattan.
Nominating “Jizz_(birding)” as greatest Wikipedia URL...
Nominating “Jizz_(birding)” as greatest Wikipedia URL parenthetical in history https://en. wikipedia.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jizz_(birding)
@bn2b https://en. wikipedia.
jesus christ joel what even
lol Patrick YOU will be in the 1% by the time you are 34 if...
Patrick I get sad sometimes.
@patbits Patrick I get sad sometimes.
Monte Testaccio is a huge mound of ancient garbage in Rome....
Monte Testaccio is a huge mound of ancient garbage in Rome. https://en.
paulbot is dead
kevin
tbth i'm not brave like u
http://observer.com/2010/02/listening-in-on-the-iharperis-me...
@leahfinnegan http://observer.
omg i just didn't have it on my phone we had no idea we had...
no thank you, you really did it
http://youreallydidit.com/Leah
http://youreallydidit.
One friend texted another: “sorry your life has falen...
quinn edited it tho
mmmm i can taste the birch
do you have a nice wawa soft pretzel to go with it?
@dannosowitz @PJVogt @cwarzel do you have a nice wawa soft pretzel to go with it?
promise me you didn't say, “well, now, I can see both sides”
I like the new Spotify green because I embrace change and...
I like the new Spotify green because I embrace change and progress, and respect creative work.
$$$
Updated: Some people are telling me that it's basically...
Updated: Some people are telling me that it's basically hopeless and we can't really secure stuff https://medium. com/message/fairly-random-thoughts-on-ashley-madison-the-swiftly-moving-line-a3f48bc309ec I do not know!
I added that to the piece, it's kind of great.
@jackrusher I added that to the piece, it's kind of great.
oh yeah--wayner sort of of advocates for a continuum and...
@jackrusher oh yeah--wayner sort of of advocates for a continuum and identifies tradeoffs between fully encrypted/hashed.
I was thinking about that! But they just completely screwed...
@jackrusher I was thinking about that! But they just completely screwed the pooch on the hash function, right?
be super happy to be proved totally wrong
From @benbrown a great idea for what to do with the Ashley...
From @benbrown a great idea for what to do with the Ashley Madison hack data (if you don't choose to release it all). https://twitter.
i definitely feel that the journalism is coming whether we...
lol no i can't this year i'm exhausted
god that is a great question and i have no answer
so many!
@Medley so many!
translucent dbs are good tho
not really planning shit is my superpower
You could do an article on rhinovirus without changing the...
@_loveallthis @anildash You could do an article on rhinovirus without changing the title at all.
ohno
like there's this sense that i wrote that businessweek code...
I wrote a blog post about Ashley Madison it feels kind of...
I wrote a blog post about Ashley Madison it feels kind of weird to write things tbh https://medium.
goddammit ted
playing the long game over here
gawker published its brand guidelines...
gawker published its brand guidelines https://docs. google.
i think petzold's CODE already does the hard work there,...
@BoredAstronaut i think petzold's CODE already does the hard work there, going from light switches to assembly, also http://nand2tetris.
I know. There are so many product opportunities here.
@djacobs I know. There are so many product opportunities here.
The 37 million AshleyMadison users should chill about the...
The 37 million AshleyMadison users should chill about the big hack; after all, it's just metadata. http://krebsonsecurity.
It's a lot of hair and razors go dull quickly. It might...
@jackrusher It's a lot of hair and razors go dull quickly. It might make more sense to build our own razor forge.
Fairly Random Thoughts on Ashley Madison & the Swiftly Moving Line
Fairly Random Thoughts on Ashley Madison & the Swiftly Moving Line This photo was super-generously licensed by Michael Vroegop and made available on Flickr under the Creative Commons Attribution 2. 0 generic license .
that is a great tweet
Related to that “mark on the world,” some of the Intel 386...
@worrydream @raganwald Related to that “mark on the world,” some of the Intel 386 team found God mid-design— https://twitter.
i don't have a point actually. i guess "history is a very...
@raganwald @worrydream i don't have a point actually.
Also “the Von Neumann architecture” still rankles people...
@raganwald @worrydream Also “the Von Neumann architecture” still rankles people because he ended up getting credited for so much EDVAC work.
I guess it's not enough to start an industry; you also need...
@raganwald @worrydream I guess it's not enough to start an industry; you also need to keep it.
(I grew up in West Chester, PA, so it was a parallel...
@worrydream (I grew up in West Chester, PA, so it was a parallel universe--C64s and PETs in the middle school instead of Apple IIs, etc.
Also that early days, Jack Tramiel tried to buy Apple and...
@worrydream Also that early days, Jack Tramiel tried to buy Apple and Jobs seriously considered it. Peddle was a crazy wizard.
u will do great and its a great team
lolOL
false dichotomy
today I fully came to understand setInterval
Thanks for this $1,000 in Taco Bell coupons, Pepsi Awesome...
@jcn @spollck Thanks for this $1,000 in Taco Bell coupons, Pepsi Awesome Foundation!
hey guys nothing is more awesome than authentic engagement...
whoa @jcn is doing cool weird stuff...
whoa @jcn is doing cool weird stuff http://www. nytimes.
no you need to leave town immediately
Michael ulgh
We are taking the twins to Sesame Place tomorrow and I'm...
We are taking the twins to Sesame Place tomorrow and I'm mega-bummed I'll miss a whole day of tweets about what constitutes journalism.
The community at @brooklyn_js was super warm and kind and...
The community at @brooklyn_js was super warm and kind and fun and inclusive and a little drunk. The new nerd reality is confusing.
true
I'm at @brooklyn_js chillin with @ramapoola to explain the...
Being a nerd in NYC is all right in 2015. @brooklyn_js
Being a nerd in NYC is all right in 2015.
gentle dozing
“The Glaive” was a cool name for a weapon.
“The Glaive” was a cool name for a weapon.
next time for sure tho?
@majelbstoat next time for sure tho?
Go back to bed for 40 minutes or put down my phone and...
Go back to bed for 40 minutes or put down my phone and enjoy the quiet house for 40 minutes?
booked all day :( and then tomorrow I am at Sesame Place...
it's soooo baaaaaad
Fav if 53685 cyan 574447 25, RT if 5299 6458 indigo 88836...
Lol more like Amazon SLIME day amirite INITIATE JADE HELM...
Leah ilu Jade Helm 4eva 7474863929.ieru.74748733 ee 73737...
@leahfinnegan Leah ilu Jade Helm 4eva 7474863929. ieru.
To all my Jade Helm peeps, I just want to say I miss you...
To all my Jade Helm peeps, I just want to say I miss you and 48262 848638 3973 72 993938 37289 39474.
no it really is outstanding. It's very patient with the...
@majelbstoat no it really is outstanding. It's very patient with the reader and hashing is very hard.
this is hard to do right and you paced it so well. Worth...
@rtembe @majelbstoat @mwichary @Medium this is hard to do right and you paced it so well. Worth reading 2x.
I am on bus home reading this carefully (just passed the...
@rtembe @majelbstoat @mwichary @Medium I am on bus home reading this carefully (just passed the NYC Medium offices) and this is gooooood.
GOOD STORY!
@majelbstoat GOOD STORY!
wow
”The…penitent did not mention whether the trouble was from...
”The…penitent did not mention whether the trouble was from his conscience or some other source, such as his mother. ” http://www.
I just ended up learning Clojure
yes
totl, dttsm.
@eveostay @Jesselansner totl, dttsm.
ymbr
well it's not exactly obvious
but it turns out
idk, ijdka. itik, bito ijdk.
idk, ijdka. itik, bito ijdk.
ulgh jenna okay but how will i measure my self-worth
we're men that's what we DO
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/468784141153345537
@anildash @jennydeluxe https://twitter.
i don't know why i invented @savedyouacoffee you are both...
“RT @savedyouacoffee The whole town of Hershey smells like...
@anildash @jennydeluxe “RT @savedyouacoffee The whole town of Hershey smells like gently burned chocolate.
whoa
There is an amazing startup out of South Boston called...
There is an amazing startup out of South Boston called AppDahg you should check it out.
i'm so happy with this outcome
a lot of people swear by AppDahg
there is no feeling quite so infuriating as having your...
i've met her she's pretty chill
wait did fox and philomena hang with zelda because that is...
Yes! Thank you! Absolutely no one understands that! But...
@worrydream Yes! Thank you!
ahhhhhh an emotional memex
there is very very little software that encourages empathy...
I think we have different experiences here. For ex. Ta...
@worrydream I think we have different experiences here. For ex.
also see http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/novel-fin...
@worrydream also see http://www. scientificamerican.
agree on uncle tom's cabin, less so on Hiroshima/My Lai....
@worrydream agree on uncle tom's cabin, less so on Hiroshima/My Lai. But lots of other empathy examples—bios of difficult leaders, etc.
wellll there are some historical examples of narrative...
that's what the ghost said
[sees tweet in google glass, immediately stops having sex...
just being proactive before someone sends me the current...
also nerds before you choke i'm just trolling i KNOW that...
guys the PROBLEM is NOT with the person with the low or...
Phone screenshots always lead me to judge the user's...
Phone screenshots always lead me to judge the user's battery charge. Less than 21% and the person is irresponsible; 100% is a loser.
that is REALLY smart!
@dch__ @josevalim that is REALLY smart!
maybe Russians will buy it
You're the best, Jim.
@jimray You're the best, Jim.
The Holocrat of the Breakfast Table, by Mark Wendell Lotto,...
@alanalevinson @marklotto @leahfinnegan @CondeElevator The Holocrat of the Breakfast Table, by Mark Wendell Lotto, Sr.
ulgh don't joke about people being fridge it's like saying...
:(
the honest-to-god truth in NYC media is that not having...
thank god this finally happened...
thank god this finally happened https://twitter.
and one more thing http://giphy.com/gifs/film-indiana-jones-...
@kjhealy and one more thing http://giphy.
america wanted this to happen https://twitter.com/ftrain/sta...
america wanted this to happen https://twitter.
“The difference between the consumeR and the consumeD,”...
“The difference between the consumeR and the consumeD,” says Tim Cook to a fearful crowd, “is merely R&amp;D. ” Pause.
“Informer” by Snow starts playing but its the word...
I think I heard @katiedrumm refer to it as "toph time" in a...
@tophtucker I think I heard @katiedrumm refer to it as "toph time" in a stand-up?
People crowing about the possible low sales of the Apple...
People crowing about the possible low sales of the Apple Watch have not obviously not considered the consequences of disappointing Apple.
pretty damn early over here toph
wow
the best jokes are the ones that require wikipedia to write
“Belisarius: Why so Sarious?” —ByzFeed, 564
“Belisarius: Why so Sarious?
ByzFeed was the favored news source the Byzantine empire,...
ByzFeed was the favored news source the Byzantine empire, millennials loved it.
it's a sensible strategy
i wonder if in ancient times people thought about what...
i wonder if in ancient times people thought about what teens thought. “ten things teens know about justinian the great.
we don't talk about teens as much as we used to
Refers to the version—we need people who can support from...
@tommyunger Refers to the version—we need people who can support from ice cream sandwich, onward.
in the suburbs stoop shrimp is called lawn prawns
rise and grind
porchata
it got the retweet sarah be cool
curb curds
i turned on dms-for-all and really look forward to engaging...
well I mean I always have code/product/client projects...
@knowtheory well I mean I always have code/product/client projects running; I just don't talk about them directly. Writing too unstable.
meaghan there were circumstances
meaghan
ted i just got here let me ease into this
twitter truly is the workshop of capitalism
okay so @michelet just pointed out that maybe i'll have...
Right right
Please DM me if you are a sr. Android (4.0+) dev who wants...
Please DM me if you are a sr. Android (4.
The last tweet was totally real I'm having trouble getting...
The last tweet was totally real I'm having trouble getting the tone right. Let me try again.
It's going to take me a little while to get the tone right.
@meaghano It's going to take me a little while to get the tone right.
NERD$: I co-founded a platform+product agency and whoa do...
NERD$: I co-founded a platform+product agency and whoa do we need Sr. Android (4.
roof ramps
stoop shrimp with gutter butter
stoop shrimp http://gawker.com/summer-in-the-city-and-the-st...
stoop shrimp http://gawker.
it's weird how much the enemies of fridge are my friends
#newsbiz
Holds up https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/36083398518780723...
Holds up https://twitter. com/ftrain/status/360833985187807233?
#newsbiz http://www.theverge.com/2015/7/9/8908279/the-awl-pr...
#newsbiz http://www. theverge.
“Ortberg compares [@Choire] to Tom Bombadil, the friendly...
“Ortberg compares [ @Choire ] to Tom Bombadil, the friendly magical being from Lord of The Rings. ” http://www.
that's not my real signature
fair point, sometimes you just need the story, but story...
@joeljohnson fair point, sometimes you just need the story, but story approval...
paid traffic
great canary for untrustworthy pubs tho...
@joeljohnson great canary for untrustworthy pubs tho #q =singer+vehicle+design&tbm=nws" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://www. google.
So @tophtucker and @stephcd are showing easter eggs inside...
So @tophtucker and @stephcd are showing easter eggs inside of easter eggs and it is awesome https://twitter.
all that code is purely client side
Are we measuring broken engagements, fervid glances, scroll...
@jonathanshainin @marklotto Are we measuring broken engagements, fervid glances, scroll playing, or bad impressions?
cool minks got it
wait no you are more valuable by that reasoning
she can't we've tried
see everything works out
i have no idea how to mail things from my office
lol
dude these are going for $50 on ebay
lol
That would be super tacky so I have a stack at my desk,...
@rustyk5 That would be super tacky so I have a stack at my desk, below a White House coffee cup for business cards. https://twitter.
COBY ELECTRONICS: “Its name came from deleting the 'w' and...
COBY ELECTRONICS: “Its name came from deleting the 'w' and second 'o' in Cowboy.
it's pretty accurate
but mark the world wide web was only invented in 2014
i mean damned if i know
is there a word/term for the way headphones wear out at the...
is there a word/term for the way headphones wear out at the plug and you have to wiggle them to get bass back?
i know we've all had just about enough of this shit
this is the last one okay http://www.usatoday.com/story/mone...
this is the last one okay http://www. usatoday.
mom memes are real i've seen them in the wild...
mom memes are real i've seen them in the wild https://medium.
How Microsoft nearly owned online advertising...
How Microsoft nearly owned online advertising http://adexchanger.
beyond grubs
woodpeckers are cool
patrick
anil i am scared
uglh
maine is not canada rusty, and wishing won't change that
:gmail-crab-emoji: @rustyk5 @LorenDavie...
:gmail-crab-emoji: @rustyk5 @LorenDavie https://twitter.
me neither do we know any canadians?
@silviakillings me neither do we know any canadians?
silvia
it's good to see you
PATRICK are you back on TWITTER?
@patbits PATRICK are you back on TWITTER?
dammit amy
say curate again i swear to god
cobble hill would survive 20 minutes out here
longer term I doubt anyone in ditmas will look up from...
we already have the national this is kind of nbd tbh
it's a real problem
I mean it's totally fair criticism.
@leahfinnegan I mean it's totally fair criticism.
normally i just need to guess
as a writer it was very comforting to have an answer to the...
@jimaley as a writer it was very comforting to have an answer to the question “what drugs is this person on?
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/618421888843411456/photo/1
@mattbuchanan @caseyjohnston https://twitter.
sigh
I love bisect tho its like magic. Whereas rebase oooof.
@epc I love bisect tho its like magic. Whereas rebase oooof.
oh god where do you even begin with that
That thing where, over 25 years, people were like, “Hey,...
That thing where, over 25 years, people were like, “Hey, give up control and accept help from others? ” I maybe could have listened sooner.
I'm not big on life lessons but I learned a lot about how...
I'm not big on life lessons but I learned a lot about how to give up control/accept help on that one and it turned into something huge. So.
I M a coding expert
It's immodest to tweet this but What Is Code was highly...
It's immodest to tweet this but What Is Code was highly successful http://m. huffpost.
only a monster mother would allow her child to chew that...
thank god, because the minute i saw “ketchup” my apple...
i hope you mean organic tomato paste on spelt bread
perfect
i have so much to learn bret
i've seen a lot of javascript-driven cpu simulators in my...
i've seen a lot of javascript-driven cpu simulators in my life and this one is pretty sweet http://schweigi. github.
I appreciate that they just went for “the future of...
@worrydream I appreciate that they just went for “the future of technology will be entirely determined by petty corporate politics,” though.
That's what i keep coming back to! (1) The future looks...
@worrydream That's what i keep coming back to! (1) The future looks like a ScummVM game; and (2) people are just nasty garbage.
i checked the calendar and it coincides with five birthday...
i think she's living in a days inn in milwaukee?
@leahfinnegan @jamiekeiles i think she's living in a days inn in milwaukee?
sometimes i turn to mo and say, “i'm not sure if i'm ready...
@leahfinnegan @jamiekeiles sometimes i turn to mo and say, “i'm not sure if i'm ready to be a dad.
why would she fly if she's already a perfect angel?
@leahfinnegan @jamiekeiles why would she fly if she's already a perfect angel?
is the bostie with them also https://instagram.com/p/4tw6L5D...
@leahfinnegan @jamiekeiles is the bostie with them also https://instagram.
i'll bring the twins
benjamin if there's one thing we've learned it's that we...
if we all spoke https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lojban then...
if we all spoke https://en. wikipedia.
the answer is obviously more Lojban...
the answer is obviously more Lojban https://en. wikipedia.
it truly was an amazing decade for villainous hair and we...
I know its craaazy
charlene this goes very deep http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0097...
@ursonate charlene this goes very deep http://www. imdb.
This video from Sun in 1992 predicts life in 2004 and...
This video from Sun in 1992 predicts life in 2004 and watching it you think, they spent so much MONEY: https://www. youtube.
It's more likely to pop accidentally out of IoT frolic,...
@sippey @fredwilson It's more likely to pop accidentally out of IoT frolic, “why are two million kids chatting using ZoopaPetz protocol?
plus product work, which defines "good" UX, is a discipline...
@sippey @fredwilson plus product work, which defines "good" UX, is a discipline almost entirely organized around centralized $ervices.
i think about this a ton. to execute you're moving back...
@sippey @fredwilson i think about this a ton. to execute you're moving back down the stack which is painfully hard.
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/617347567911870464/photo/1
@joeljohnson https://twitter.
everyone who has ever slighted or patronized you as a...
i mean we spend your annual healthcare budget on fireworks...
andrew come to a barbecue become one of us
Thanks!
@barrylachapelle @ideo Thanks!
whoa.
@karenmcgrane whoa.
true
oh man and today is a holiday
like, if you do something, and it looks at all like this,...
i'm learning SO MUCH about product management watching this...
who could have predicted this shocking turn of events
oh man management is just pouring jet fuel on a trash fire...
oh man management is just pouring jet fuel on a trash fire https://www. reddit.
oh my god this reddit apocalypse...
oh my god this reddit apocalypse http://gawker.
Huh https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/616768626834673665/pho...
Huh https://twitter.
listen Slateriarchy is just a system we live under
lol
Prizes tho?
@jimaley Prizes tho?
Umm she has some http://tilde.club responsibilities who's...
@anildash @john_overholt @jessamyn @POTUS Umm she has some http://tilde.
&niiiiiice;
omg PLEASE
seriously it was the biggest boopiest thing it was cool as...
these people are amazing and they have this ENORMOUS screen...
these people are amazing and they have this ENORMOUS screen visualizing botnets that's all like BOOP BOOP BOOP BOOP https://twitter.
i'm sorry
goddammit @bn2b it sucks to be so right...
goddammit @bn2b it sucks to be so right https://twitter. com/Sierra_OffLine/status/564967440724267008 http://thefederalist.
space is hard but hyphens can be very soft
Oh literally no one knows except it will involve lots of...
@oneanabee Oh literally no one knows except it will involve lots of labor and thought. It's culture, no actual solutions, just more culture.
I know, but at least we know now where we need to take the...
@oneanabee I know, but at least we know now where we need to take the industry and the kind of work we need to do over the next 20 years!
(and then we end up outsourcing the emotional/mental labor...
@oneanabee (and then we end up outsourcing the emotional/mental labor http://www. wired.
and the work to actually fix it is GRITTY product and...
comments sections are like these fema trailers of the web,...
there's more 15 year olds. in some ways it's because...
@oneanabee there's more 15 year olds. in some ways it's because product developers just don't work to manage that behavior.
which i mean honestly deep down it kind of still is.
@oneanabee which i mean honestly deep down it kind of still is.
the emails mention gender, the industry was always male...
@oneanabee the emails mention gender, the industry was always male dominated, it's just tonally different. it was like being an accountant.
worked through, they're like "omg i have to try python!"
@oneanabee worked through, they're like "omg i have to try python!
and it's like where did this GO?
@oneanabee and it's like where did this GO?
but seriously i've gotten SO MANY emails that are like my...
lol no it's a disaster tho and the discourse around it is a...
yeah no i think that it's such a red-hot issue plus i'm a...
which, like, who wouldn't be exhausted/suspicious
what i noticed from feedback is that people not in tech saw...
@oneanabee what i noticed from feedback is that people not in tech saw where i was going; tech folks are more exhausted/suspicious.
it's like we felt architectural survivor's guilt after WWII...
there was breakfast sbarros going on today at union station...
no exactly at any moment they realize you're actually alive...
i've been getting TONS of emails from women in their 60s...
the fantasy that coders are geniuses is a self-reinforcing...
even if you are a jackass sexist who believes women lack...
@oneanabee even if you are a jackass sexist who believes women lack like, some math gene, or can't be nerd geniuses, it doesn't matter.
yeah some people get the irony there and some don't. the...
@oneanabee yeah some people get the irony there and some don't. the thing i was going for was...
then again yesterday i was at nyc penn station at 9am on a...
yeah the exact word I was thinking was "creepy" as I walked...
@harrisj @mkhandekar yeah the exact word I was thinking was "creepy" as I walked to farragut north!
Please! Agreed! Come by our offices near Union Square.
@tammy Please! Agreed!
that sounds great!
@DUQE @nclud that sounds great!
hi!
@DUQE hi!
is it really that close? I would actually love to visit....
@harrisj @mkhandekar is it really that close? I would actually love to visit.
also you Jacob
oh man I would LOVE to come and say hi to @mkhandekar
We hacked into his computer and there was a folder called...
@anildash @riordan @bn2b We hacked into his computer and there was a folder called OPERATION P. M.
i literally have no idea how you could make a lawn that...
suit, no candy, coffee
two actually
dude the lawns are gorgeous
Imposter syndrome overdrive https://twitter.com/ftrain/statu...
Imposter syndrome overdrive https://twitter.
http://sonic-pi.net/
@kentbrew http://sonic-pi.
That's great to read on a Sunday morning. Thank you!
@brandonmullins That's great to read on a Sunday morning. Thank you!
Oh and “House of Representatives” is “Freshest Utopia...
@rustyk5 Oh and “House of Representatives” is “Freshest Utopia Overseen,” “Vetoes Fourteen Parishes,” and “She's fourteen, operatives!
Ruth Bader Ginsburg comes in with “Ban Turgid Burghers” and...
@rustyk5 Ruth Bader Ginsburg comes in with “Ban Turgid Burghers” and ”Danger! Right Suburb,” but also, perplexingly, “Rub Hurting Badger.
Clarence Thomas is an anagram for "Conceal Hamster"
tonight, there's gonna be a lot of jiggery-pokery with...
A huge amount of bullshit went to bullshit heaven today.
A huge amount of bullshit went to bullshit heaven today.
i mean he'd almost need to
i mean, i think so!
@leahfinnegan i mean, i think so!
oh i dunno i like this one too https://twitter.com/xeni/stat...
@leahfinnegan oh i dunno i like this one too https://twitter.
at first i was like whatever but you have to admit that is...
at first i was like whatever but you have to admit that is a handsome gorilla http://www. dailymail.
leah there is one REMARKABLE reply in that twitter thread
it just makes sense
whoa @onthemedia went full DATAPOCALYPSE...
whoa @onthemedia went full DATAPOCALYPSE http://www. onthemedia.
"in the world" not "in to the world" the warm flush of...
We should totally do this more often.
We should totally do this more often.
God, does anything feel better than when you learn that...
God, does anything feel better than when you learn that there's a whole new kind of human equality in to the world?
you and @tophtucker could just get up and stand there and...
most cats suck
feeling this rn https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/5896084690...
feeling this rn https://twitter.
they did! It's buried here in my twitter feed but it was...
@mathowie they did!
happens to all of us
i read it three times
this is amazing trolling http://tktk.gawker.com/woman-who-ca...
this is amazing trolling http://tktk. gawker.
i use tmux, sir (tips fedora)
oh wow elinks just shits the bed entirely
umm http://elinks.or.cz/ much
@rustyk5 umm http://elinks. or.
i miss those. they were great and worked incredibly well.
@meyerweb i miss those. they were great and worked incredibly well.
wow *that* does a little dance to get you some content
I love when it does this. Inside of every giant web app...
I love when it does this. Inside of every giant web app lurks a crappy HTML page with blue underlined links.
guys i gotta do this retweet okay so just be chill
Thank you! So much credit is due to @tyrangiel and the...
@BillGates Thank you! So much credit is due to @tyrangiel and the entire @BW team for tirelessly working to improve that article.
the party is still going
bloomberg west
but indeed our hair has life force. It holds onto the head
@jakebeckman but indeed our hair has life force.
my barber is always amazed at it. He just can't believe it...
@jakebeckman my barber is always amazed at it. He just can't believe it keeps happening.
I would try
It's been down for five minutes which is a life record.
It's been down for five minutes which is a life record.
I did what I could said the makeup person regarding my...
I did what I could said the makeup person regarding my cowlick. I tried many things.
for a moment just now I was like why am I here in this...
which reminds me of https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n26hAOmk...
@theblanketfort which reminds me of https://www. youtube.
That's why I use this amazing new service called Medical...
@joshu That's why I use this amazing new service called Medical Doctors.
never forget how we survived dancing baby groot
i mean what the hell you should do that
oh my god Dima what have you done
ooooof what is this
nooo that was great
which is fair!
@reppep which is fair!
does that song tom's diner ever get stuck in your head the...
does that song tom's diner ever get stuck in your head the way it goes deh deh deh dah, deh deh dehhh dah, deh dah deh dah deh dah dehhh ta?
god that's true
well alex hacking is a term that the media has...
Oh, hah no—they just invert the gravity.
@rustyk5 Oh, hah no—they just invert the gravity.
TWO MINUTES OKAY ON ME HI PAUL WHAT DID YOU WRITE OKAY...
Hahah Rusty that's all CGI now.
@rustyk5 Hahah Rusty that's all CGI now.
the thing is you don't know for sure if he ever leaves
it's just your beautiful mind shining through
I worried that the spiders that make up my soul would pour...
I worried that the spiders that make up my soul would pour out of my mouth if I went on TV but that was not a valid fear. Soul spiders dgaf.
I'm no longer terrified of going on television. Turns out...
I'm no longer terrified of going on television. Turns out people are just like yep he's pretty fat, plus you can take anti-anxiety stuff.
on Instagram
getting burned for namedropping is the sweetest burn
the charlie rose makeup lady was so amazing she was like...
“Are you going on TV again any time soon? Because I have a...
“Are you going on TV again any time soon? Because I have a person who can help with your hair.
i made a vow
oh my GOD
Oh! And there's a giant book of JSTOR history that I happen...
@modernserf @tnr Oh! And there's a giant book of JSTOR history that I happen to have and all sorts of complex issues related to it.
MUUUUUUUUUUUUUMPS
lolololol
OOOOOH. Google hates to give access but I could try.
@squarelyrooted OOOOOH. Google hates to give access but I could try.
3/2 (Esp. if I can talk to engineers! PR people are...
3/2 (Esp. if I can talk to engineers!
2/2 What other databases should I write about for @tnr? I...
2/2 What other databases should I write about for @tnr ? I have ideas!
1/2 Every month(ish) @tnr lets me talk about huge...
1/2 Every month(ish) @tnr lets me talk about huge databases. I.
no no i totally support you buying the print edition it's...
Before you get too upset with me, I predicted this would...
Before you get too upset with me, I predicted this would happen. https://twitter.
for reals tho? Which newsstand? @Tyrangiel
@zachgibson @business for reals tho? Which newsstand?
its just Tom Petty plus cat puns I had to show up
jk I know you'd never
now I'm deeeeeeee, deeee clawin'
lol
does he know about the very cheap software defined radios...
@michaelroston does he know about the very cheap software defined radios that are now everywhere and cost $15?
OH HELLS YES
Is he a programmery type of person?
@michaelroston @BW Is he a programmery type of person?
yessssssssss
His eyes aren't soft. That's just the laser beams...
His eyes aren't soft. That's just the laser beams recharging.
could have been two lines of APL
I need to start leaving a running CIDER open at all times...
that is amaaaaaazing
WORKS
it's like the opposite of creepshots
people tweeting pictures of the businessweek cover at me...
goooood luuuuuuuck and safe travels!
@ursonate goooood luuuuuuuck and safe travels!
yeah they were SERIOUS
it made me laugh though and isn't the laughter of one...
@LorcanRK it made me laugh though and isn't the laughter of one person better than all the retweets in the world?
“Surely someone has figured a way to transform an mbox...
“Surely someone has figured a way to transform an mbox folder into a nice PDF,” said the stupidest man in the universe three hours ago.
tempting!
@RiloBarnett tempting!
anyway i just wanted to write about something that isn't...
anyway i just wanted to write about something that isn't code.
Pax Google
lol this was the EXACT intent
the xpath implementation inside of Saxon is great. I've...
@harrisj @kleinmatic the xpath implementation inside of Saxon is great. I've been calling it from Clojure and then walking the results.
I mean the giant Michael Kay XSLT2 tome is everything you...
@kleinmatic I mean the giant Michael Kay XSLT2 tome is everything you need.
Acronym I just learned: JV for “joint venture.” Gonna be...
Acronym I just learned: JV for “joint venture. ” Gonna be sharing real biz talk as I learn it from here out.
actually,
of course it's on github! https://github.com/bloombergmedia
@LukeHarby of course it's on github! https://github.
I don't THINK that's stickily set, like once you close that...
@jffrybrwn @Bloomberg I don't THINK that's stickily set, like once you close that tab. it's asked me like a dozen times, for example.
to make you an awesome certificate in a purely opt-in way...
@jffrybrwn @Bloomberg to make you an awesome certificate in a purely opt-in way using the native capabilities of the web platform?
No it makes a “certificate” and is purely local storage,...
@jffrybrwn @Bloomberg No it makes a “certificate” and is purely local storage, your picture is never transmitted AND you can opt out.
we brought this on ourselves
Donner party diary: “Jebediah passed. We are setting in to...
@joshuatopolsky @rustyk5 @spladow Donner party diary: “Jebediah passed. We are setting in to ‘tasks.
its a good dream, like the one shared by pioneers of 1830...
Java is not that bad! But it is BIG and easy to get lost...
@Stammy @RiloBarnett @jsatk @swb1192 Java is not that bad! But it is BIG and easy to get lost inside it.
the web started as a ship of theseus and now it's a space...
well it's much easier to go up a level and much harder to...
you are so right
Thank you! This is super helpful. And complex!
@evanmcc Thank you! This is super helpful.
like react is a virtualized abstract DOM and this is,...
i mean no you're actually right in like a crazy abstract way
(I'm starting to see. They are communicating it roughly but...
@evanmcc (I'm starting to see. They are communicating it roughly but it feels like an obvious/inevitable step since asm.
Okay so...today we're doing this AOT transpiling-to-asm.js...
@evanmcc Okay so... today we're doing this AOT transpiling-to-asm.
Plugins were cool I understood plugins.
@jacqui @knowtheory Plugins were cool I understood plugins.
Ahhhh which is why it's called WebAssembly.
@evanmcc Ahhhh which is why it's called WebAssembly.
Thanks. So...hmm...eventually we might get a VM that...
@evanmcc Thanks. So...
WOW THAT DUKE
“Editors such as vim and emacs should just work.”...
“Editors such as vim and emacs should just work. ” https://github.
ted i'm worried
I THINK it's JVM-ish/hotspot-ish with DOM for classlib? But...
I THINK it's JVM-ish/hotspot-ish with DOM for classlib? But they're saying “binary format” instead of “bytecode” and asm.
omg what is happening who are we now...
omg what is happening who are we now https://github. com/WebAssembly/design/blob/master/UseCases.
oh man just think of the platforms targeting this
“Why create a new standard when there is already asm.js?”...
“Why create a new standard when there is already asm. js?
david i'm worried
Oh wow WebAssembly is going to be bananacakes...
Oh wow WebAssembly is going to be bananacakes https://github. com/WebAssembly/design/blob/master/FutureFeatures.
omg i'm SO SORRY
guys WHIP THE DIP is trademark Topolsky-Ford-Sysco-CISCO...
@spladow @rustyk5 guys WHIP THE DIP is trademark Topolsky-Ford-Sysco-CISCO (crazy merger! don't ask!
1000%, whip the dip
oh my
like it really is a perfect metric for how much you...
lolol
I know it's melting my brain.
@ericbrownzzz I know it's melting my brain.
I welcome the feedback!
@leahfinnegan I welcome the feedback!
Also what's up with the grade inflation? "Near A-" is just...
Also what's up with the grade inflation? "Near A-" is just B+.
I have received the ultimate writer's test: Taking critical...
I have received the ultimate writer's test: Taking critical reader email seriously even though it is in Comic Sans. https://twitter.
the enemy of the sharing economy
we can all live together .io and .club
@ox we can all live together . io and .
elle dear
and there is nothing there yet. Soon though!
@bcpk @joshuatopolsky and there is nothing there yet. Soon though!
just http://postlight.com
@bcpk @joshuatopolsky just http://postlight.
oh god it would be so soothing
like just why you are both in agreement on dishwashers is...
guys okay I have zero interest in the sims but TREMENDOUS...
I'll get you one. You'll appreciate how great the print is....
@marklotto @anildash I'll get you one. You'll appreciate how great the print is.
ANIL
arrrrrrrrrrrrgh
tweetstorm comin
next time
I ruined my back so I'm hiding in the hotel waiting for...
@gamoid I ruined my back so I'm hiding in the hotel waiting for advil to kick in. May stumble down soon!
same here!
@dylan20 same here!
thank you for whipping the dip
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/610844766415130624/photo/1
https://twitter.
it just makes sense
stuff like that happens if they were using it as test data...
@AdamWeinstein stuff like that happens if they were using it as test data etc?
it happens
this is very probably true
wow
I'm not there but this #SonyE3 situation sounds like BAD...
@max_read @IRLClub I'm not there but this #SonyE3 situation sounds like BAD NEWS for a once-great company that knew who its fans were.
wow (i finally saw it for the first time this am it is...
Whip the dip
i think you will be okay
Also there's good white noise going.
@bobbie @zeynep @Medium Also there's good white noise going.
this is the QUIETEST place it is WONDERFUL
just for a little and i am a horrible post-air travel...
good point
whoa
i'll have some in a little bit and will definitely report...
I am at @Medium which is a calm and collected place to...
I am at @Medium which is a calm and collected place to write and think with good beverage options. https://twitter.
CODE by Charles Petzold is truly ground-up.
@sophcw @ENAML CODE by Charles Petzold is truly ground-up.
most birthdays suck but yours is cool
Hi guys happy birthday to Laura.
@laura_june @joshuatopolsky Hi guys happy birthday to Laura.
yes :(
nah people are cool. I mean some aren't. But I like to hear...
@rzgreenfield nah people are cool. I mean some aren't.
oh no I've received hundreds? of emails they're just not...
@thijs @gerwitz oh no I've received hundreds?
Oh my god I was so tired on that podcast I had no idea....
Oh my god I was so tired on that podcast I had no idea.
So I was on @joshuatopolsky's podcast to talk “Code,” but...
So I was on @joshuatopolsky 's podcast to talk “Code,” but instead we talked about an imaginary restaurant, Dipperz. https://soundcloud.
That moment in the car service when you double-check that...
That moment in the car service when you double-check that it's actually JFK.
Whoa old-school AOL compiled its code by having developers...
Whoa old-school AOL compiled its code by having developers email it http://www. foreverscape.
that means a lot coming from you!
@tolar that means a lot coming from you!
excellent
they agree! https://twitter.com/McDNYTriState/status/6102723...
@Schwartzesque they agree! https://twitter.
Will this also be true in San Francisco McDonalds? I'm...
@McDNYTriState @leahfinnegan @dannosowitz Will this also be true in San Francisco McDonalds? I'm hoping so.
yeah like the per-refill ritual is sooooo good
oh man that's a good idea next time in PA
the thing about good diner coffee is you want to be able to...
you know this might solve my SF problem
lol its sonic pi (which basically is ruby)
yeah it's VERY high risk
If Hillary Wants to Help the Middle Class, Start With Coffee
there's a think piece here leah a thinkpiece with terrible...
as @dannosowitz will attest WaWa has coffee that poor,...
i miss when everyone smoked parliaments and couldn't taste...
i just like to like have one or two cups of basically okay...
I haven't made that joke since 2013.
I haven't made that joke since 2013.
i would be cool with that tbh
Q: How does a waiter say, “You disgust me?” A: “Americano?”
Q: How does a waiter say, “You disgust me? ” A: “Americano?
thank you you are a good person who made a real suggestion
I just wanted to go somewhere nice and have nice coffee...
I just wanted to go somewhere nice and have nice coffee that doesn't have like a quarter-inch skin on it.
Okay that question obviously brought out some strong...
Okay that question obviously brought out some strong emotions and reactions.
Is there a place in SF where I can get a really WEAK cup of...
Is there a place in SF where I can get a really WEAK cup of coffee? Like, brewed to East Coast standards instead of face-ripping standards?
you'll read all seven sequels, like an animal
god spoken like a true pinger
do you get it now when i said you are definitely a pinger
Awesome!
@sethgoldin @edXOnline Awesome!
she says hi
i am the husband of @maureenflaherty!
@auremoser i am the husband of @maureenflaherty !
the odds are stacked against it
its still in there, in the tutorial section! Just doesn't...
@stribs @digiphile @business its still in there, in the tutorial section! Just doesn't unlock prose.
gotta kill digital darlings too
This story by @digiphile is good not because it praises...
This story by @digiphile is good not because it praises @BW , but because it makes clear how hard BW people WORKED http://www. huffingtonpost.
https://vine.co/v/OlDhtMFUErJ
https://vine.
i can hardly see the screen through the tears
Thanks everyone for writing in we are tracking that gcc is...
Thanks everyone for writing in we are tracking that gcc is now an alias to LLVM clang on MacOSX 10. 7+ in this issue: https://github.
been there. Oof. Very memorable.
@poetryforsupper been there. Oof.
lol all good
Today my family earned the “toddler stepped in human poop...
Today my family earned the “toddler stepped in human poop near the Seaport” badge.
I did she was touched
Right! I had the same experience. FINALLY. It's such a...
@goldman Right! I had the same experience.
I think the fallacies particularly appeal in messageboard...
@goldman I think the fallacies particularly appeal in messageboard world because they are basically conversational debugging.
oh yeah thats like, the sharpest conversational turn and...
post; the original was org-mode but it had to become word
oh i just found the tags they are exactly right
thanks!
@DeloitteTMT thanks!
will take it
my favorite feedback I've gotten a few times is "this...
I mean I knew exactly what I was wading in to when I agreed...
@jackrusher @daveliepmann I mean I knew exactly what I was wading in to when I agreed to do this.
guys its late can we just click the cowboy
Now I can stop procrastinating and finish my book about web...
Now I can stop procrastinating and finish my book about web pages.
thank god we stopped calling it paulbot
might have been some @JPaskin in there too
whoa
didn't work for a few good reasons but my idea was to make...
so @jimaley had an idea, we would have a little character...
Thank you!
@StevenLevy @enyfule Thank you!
finn i don't e
i just saw that i
wow i've heard tell of two or three other trapeze prod mgrs...
right not yet thanks Mariko it's running past the copy desk...
@kosamari @YuriChicago @rustyk5 right not yet thanks Mariko it's running past the copy desk https://github.
Oh sure. I'm also taking heat for referring to PHP by its...
@finn Oh sure. I'm also taking heat for referring to PHP by its original acronym instead of its later invented recursive meaningless one.
YES I FORGOT THIS ONE
wait what I thought the @rustyk5 PR was pretty clear
MetaFilter https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/609561672357965...
MetaFilter https://twitter.
and @stephcd for sooo much including the beautiful console...
i'm going to add this image to the discussion as I believe...
That's on me. I need to hold on to copyright so that it can...
@manuelaristaran @business That's on me. I need to hold on to copyright so that it can flow into a book I'm writing.
this is reality right here https://github.com/BloombergMedia...
this is reality right here https://github.
okay okay http://ma.tt/2015/06/paul-ford-what-is-code-bloomb...
okay okay http://ma.
This is very cool. Editorial attribution/CC licensing...
This is very cool. Editorial attribution/CC licensing letter-to-editor as pull request, resolved and deployed.
sam we know PR means love
I really like going on @onthemedia they ask lots of big...
I really like going on @onthemedia they ask lots of big questions; also I teach @OTMBrooke Sonic Pi coding. https://www.
my nerd self nods and my writer self panics when I see that
This is data journalism about journalism about data....
This is data journalism about journalism about data. https://twitter.
you'd hope but then...
@heisters @endquote you'd hope but then...
mmmmmmm
Maybe bots deserve equal rights but is that == rights or...
Maybe bots deserve equal rights but is that == rights or === rights?
wow I can smell the drool
toph why would you...set me to...null...
@tophtucker @adamrpearce @mbostock toph why would you... set me to...
let a bot dance
dammit bostock
sup @tophtucker
I did it for the twins
we talk babies for real
in movies this ends badly
can u file an issue https://github.com/BloombergMedia/whatis...
@Jesselansner @byrneseyeview can u file an issue https://github.
and others are doing it! We need to start buying a few...
@kragen @simonw @textfiles and others are doing it! We need to start buying a few spare drives.
she's cool
that is an accurate and well-reported media story thank you...
I like the way this talks to nice people who did tons of...
I like the way this talks to nice people who did tons of work. https://twitter.
no you are correct I am half horse
It's flowing into another book that I must finish. But it...
@Grady_Booch It's flowing into another book that I must finish. But it would be my privilege to help &amp; I am a fan of CTHE.
i was so thrilled to write things, i loved life of a stat
You were VERY, VERY cool about it and I increasingly...
@mjacobstein You were VERY, VERY cool about it and I increasingly appreciate that as time goes on.
thanks guys also Finn did I tell you they're MY LAWYERS TOO?
@yacomink @finn @mahon_e thanks guys also Finn did I tell you they're MY LAWYERS TOO?
limited audience but genuinely great joke
Ashley Feinberg was super pro and on top of her shit even...
Ashley Feinberg was super pro and on top of her shit even though I ramble http://gawker.
meeeeeeeee
That is very kind, thank you.
@helenvholmes That is very kind, thank you.
Finn the “Ventimiglia, Yaco-Mink, Attorneys” stationery...
@finn @mahon_e Finn the “Ventimiglia, Yaco-Mink, Attorneys” stationery doesn't fool anyone.
For people asking for a PDF version of the Code article, I...
For people asking for a PDF version of the Code article, I can do you one better. https://twitter.
:) it's the whole issue you'll recognize it because it has...
guys... it's a magazine... you buy it at a newsstand or...
@divinetechygirl @radiomorillo guys... it's a magazine...
I mean, it is true to my experience and I showed it to lots...
@enyfule @StevenLevy I mean, it is true to my experience and I showed it to lots of devs—best I can do.
this is the true face of coding photo by @mahon_e...
this is the true face of coding photo by @mahon_e https://twitter.
I'm really sorry you didn't like the article. I respect...
@qhardy I'm really sorry you didn't like the article. I respect your work, and I'd welcome critical feedback at ford @ftrain .
the aggregator has become the aggregatee
Here is MY three-word summary of my article for busy...
Here is MY three-word summary of my article for busy people: Reevaluate your life.
writers of color goes VERY deep and is very cool...
writers of color goes VERY deep and is very cool http://www. writersofcolor.
fair
if you want take a look at the print magazine. different...
@skamille if you want take a look at the print magazine. different flow for that audience.
No me too, same thing. People on the Internet were happy to...
@helenvholmes No me too, same thing. People on the Internet were happy to point out how I could improve.
I shouldn't have used sudo tho :/
mark, you blocked me, so I am not able to provide direct...
pretty sure that's all localstorage; code is on GitHub. The...
@MikeTufekci pretty sure that's all localstorage; code is on GitHub. The ads, of course, are a diff story.
right?
@brianvan right?
Behind the Code Curtain
Programmer Paul Ford discusses making code and technology more understandable to general audiences.
booooo
excellent tip will add to my "hope to comprehend one day"...
@oceankidbilly excellent tip will add to my "hope to comprehend one day" list.
hiya joel! That means a great deal.
@lovelljoel @brianmcc hiya joel! That means a great deal.
some things aren't for playing
whoops really mindbending
it really is! I was using kona, the gpled variation but its...
@oceankidbilly it really is!
god that is TRUE
pro publica could do that
#NPRreads: Love, Coding, Yuccies, And The 'NPR Sound'
Paul Ford on ‘What Is Code?’ and why we should care
been there so many times. it hurts day zero but then day...
@collinskeith been there so many times. it hurts day zero but then day like 30 it becomes the most hilarious thing.
It's so weird to be the subject of one of those
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=25QyCxVkXwQ
@jimaley https://www. youtube.
cool photoshop work
In all seriousness can you file an issue? I didn't do that...
@internetrebecca In all seriousness can you file an issue? I didn't do that graph and I'm not in the office.
my fortran sucks not gonna front
oh not me that thing is a work of genius that was @stephcd
that's why we couldn't have lunch
did you try the konami code?
@JosephGruber did you try the konami code?
oh god
i paced them out so i'd get a little more commit history at...
i am bracing myself yes
easter egg, nothing sneaky
?
@figital @bizweekgraphics ?
i like free jazz!
@avibryant i like free jazz!
hi!
@mims @RRMims hi!
lol I just feel an URGENT need to credit @BW
yes those are editors! (This is a serious answer--the...
@sriramk yes those are editors!
This is so true https://twitter.com/digiphile/status/6090155...
This is so true https://twitter.
the whole thing is on GitHub if you want to file a pull...
I mean I predicted this
i mean *I'm* comfortable with this assessment
It's being mailed to 900,000 people who subscribe to...
wow
It took 50 people helping for me to do it all myself.
@anildash It took 50 people helping for me to do it all myself.
no the print is as amazing as the digital ALSO it was...
I mean maybe the thing to do is file a github issue?...
@mgrnbrg I mean maybe the thing to do is file a github issue?
Thank you!
@_truoc Thank you!
I'm not scheduled for my reaving until 2034.
@cubosh @katiedrumm @complex I'm not scheduled for my reaving until 2034.
needs more unit tests
I know
50+ people deserve the credit tho
yeah I am the LAST person to congratulate along those lines.
@harrisj yeah I am the LAST person to congratulate along those lines.
did you see the photo illustration of the bikeshed?
@harrisj did you see the photo illustration of the bikeshed?
well?
@shani_o well?
oh @tophtucker was going to build one in but ran out of...
@harrisj oh @tophtucker was going to build one in but ran out of time.
Katie is right view it in desktop the web team did the most...
Katie is right view it in desktop the web team did the most batshit interactive I've ever seen and I LOVE them. https://twitter.
me toooooooooooooo
do you want to come on bloomberg TV with me we could do a...
also thank you for eight billion reasons
when this is done I will ceremonially burn my blazer
Remember its not lines of prose that matter its the quality...
Remember its not lines of prose that matter its the quality of the prose.
good morning Katie!
@katiedrumm good morning Katie!
6:20AM at @bizweekgraphics https://twitter.com/ftrain/status...
6:20AM at @bizweekgraphics https://twitter.
what the hell is “meaning close to exobyte size” and how...
oh the company store has these amazing cheese baskets
they pay in Bloomcoins.
@fmanjoo @leahfinnegan @natashavc they pay in Bloomcoins.
leah
oh I use it constantly
I'm not sure which tweet that replies to. Probably both.
@Tyrangiel I'm not sure which tweet that replies to. Probably both.
I just looked through it again and it is still insane.
@Tyrangiel I just looked through it again and it is still insane.
That was REALLY hard AND an experience of working with...
@Tyrangiel That was REALLY hard AND an experience of working with wonderful people who love their craft. Just a huge peak.
I spelled waaaaaay wrong
doing waaasay more than her share right now
“I swept.” –My wife after four consecutive days and nights...
“I swept. ” –My wife after four consecutive days and nights with our twins.
I did while researching this piece but switched to K for...
@blm849 @anildash I did while researching this piece but switched to K for readability.
Already scheduled my shrink
ooooof yeah it Oh man
tomorrow 7am
fair
holy shit you are right
If you love self promotional retweets I have some fantastic...
If you love self promotional retweets I have some fantastic news.
“Let me save the day for you!” [Deletes entire building]
“Let me save the day for you!
I'm going home to leave the web team behind to produce the...
I'm going home to leave the web team behind to produce the article and every fiber of my being cries out to write XSLT.
they don't let me access the terminal
how do you feel about...paper
@jrhyley how do you feel about...
“Are you just going to dive onto a spit in advance, or?” is...
“Are you just going to dive onto a spit in advance, or? ” is something a web developer just asked me.
http://platisher.com
@jamiekeiles @erikhinton http://platisher.
bound to happen
I went back and looked at those responses and we landed a...
@jimaley I went back and looked at those responses and we landed a LOT of them, which feels... like I did my job.
And useful.
@jimaley And useful.
Don't count your chickens here Daniel.
@DanielZarick @jimaley @BW Don't count your chickens here Daniel.
i'm really psyched about rot13 tweeting never occurred to me
tbbbbbbb shhhhhhpx lbheeeefrrrryyyysss
No this is just something that a freelance writer must...
@ESPNCommentary No this is just something that a freelance writer must endure like an ayahuasca ceremony.
I am braced for opinions.
I am braced for opinions.
The real problem is that no one wrote tests for the cover.
@rustyk5 @anildash The real problem is that no one wrote tests for the cover.
guys relax we're ALL smug
i have two three minute segments on tv to boil down the...
This is my official badge at Bloomberg today....
This is my official badge at Bloomberg today. https://twitter.
sorry i thought you were etsy
wait how are you guys doing search?
@eventi wait how are you guys doing search?
i think it has actually? but that part is still...
@eventi i think it has actually? but that part is still enterprisey.
eugene it's a REALLY GOOD language ecosystem and the...
i've been coming around on java lately.
@eventi i've been coming around on java lately.
java micro frameworks! http://blog.takipi.com/java-micro-fra...
java micro frameworks! http://blog.
I'm so sleepy.
@tolar @buzz I'm so sleepy.
right?
@papertyger right?
“An earlier version of this article misstated the number of...
“An earlier version of this article misstated the number of waterfalls in the 15th Street condominium of Colin Rath. ” http://www.
you will need an earbud sanitization strategy
just gonna take a little nap right here in this aquarium
oh yes also they have to come to Ditmas so I do 25% plus $6...
nope looks fun tho
It proooobably shouldn't have taken eighteen minutes to get...
It proooobably shouldn't have taken eighteen minutes to get from Lex and 59th to Coney Island Ave in this cab but it was AWESOME.
seriously everyone this picture of the girl petting the...
seriously everyone this picture of the girl petting the tiny virtual neurohorse http://motherboard. vice.
it is great i was very happy to see it!
@KorenShadmi @motherboard it is great i was very happy to see it!
how do you bulk up a story when writing for businessweek?...
how do you bulk up a story when writing for businessweek? you use the bloomberg whey.
what are words really
“And in Cupertino there was Steve Jobs, who begat, with...
@Tyrangiel @BW “And in Cupertino there was Steve Jobs, who begat, with many other men and women, the Macintosh, and it was well-marketed.
I did write this in case anyone needs to understand the...
@anildash I did write this in case anyone needs to understand the vision http://motherboard. vice.
Here is a short story I wrote for public entertainment...
Here is a short story I wrote for public entertainment purposes about what the tech industry will look like ~2045. http://motherboard.
privacy...teal...digital crown...somethingKit....
@anildash @mathowie privacy... teal...
yeah i mean what can we even say
This is such an amazingly catchy earworm...
This is such an amazingly catchy earworm http://open. spotify.
like Duplex Planet! that would be great.
@AGoldmund like Duplex Planet! that would be great.
http://mlkshk.com/p/14K53
http://mlkshk.
[sound of paul exploding]
My idea for a cartoon is two surgeons holding a bloody...
@AGoldmund My idea for a cartoon is two surgeons holding a bloody rectangular lump &amp; one says “Looks like he had a novel in him after all.
wait really? I mean I love getting credit for things but...
@Lukasaoz @dgouldin wait really? I mean I love getting credit for things but was that actually me?
Everyone I know HOW to us Google Docs I just forget that...
it's so hard to find them!
@elizabethminkel it's so hard to find them!
i just accidentally closed a google doc that someone shared...
that works great on my McIntosh
no but this is for ironic usage in a print publication
Style and usage question: _EOF_ or __EOF__?
Style and usage question: _EOF_ or __EOF__?
hey @alexgrantwright you owe me $1.50 i just sold a copy of...
@jamiekeiles @anildash @tcarmody hey @alexgrantwright you owe me $1.
I'm in it! (It's good, but it's about the business.)
@anildash @jamiekeiles @tcarmody I'm in it! (It's good, but it's about the business.
i mean they made me square dance in public school they...
you know what would be cool is a room-sized little man...
Last bit: get Python and play with it. It will not judge...
@jamiekeiles @tcarmody @anildash Last bit: get Python and play with it. It will not judge you.
http://ella.slis.indiana.edu/~roday/what%20is%20documentatio...
@jamiekeiles @tcarmody @anildash http://ella. slis.
Alex Wright's GLUT is about library data systems in history...
@jamiekeiles @tcarmody @anildash Alex Wright's GLUT is about library data systems in history and there's also his http://www. catalogingtheworld.
so for LOGIC this was rough going for me (read years ago)...
@jamiekeiles @tcarmody @anildash so for LOGIC this was rough going for me (read years ago) but written by an EXPERT http://www. amazon.
so! search engines at their simplest are not that crazy to...
@jamiekeiles @anildash @tcarmody so! search engines at their simplest are not that crazy to understand http://en.
very few popular works actually describe how things work
i have always been kibo
thank you leah
yeah I should have stopped sigh
I mean they need to cybernate
sometime bears need to get off the internet
did the first bear ask the second bear "hey baby what's...
@leahfinnegan did the first bear ask the second bear "hey baby what's ursine?
just a lot of assumptions in here that give me paws
how are u sure of the receiving bears gender
An article about pre-chum http://www.newrepublic.com/article...
An article about pre-chum http://www. newrepublic.
the dream of the 80s is alive in Berlin!
@jackrusher @daveliepmann the dream of the 80s is alive in Berlin!
dont make me pepper jack in your ass
gouda mob
swiss beatz
I kind of miss writer's block tbh.
I kind of miss writer's block tbh.
wow that reply REALLY works
and i wanted to warn you because my nerdiness is getting...
guys i know you may not have ever guessed this but i am...
whole album is amazing
this Holly Herndon https://open.spotify.com/track/0r5wWqZb5x...
this Holly Herndon https://open. spotify.
my pencil hand is a claw
docs b4 apps
tom we're just going to have to go on without her
i mean at some level aren't mute inglor miltons more...
oh yeah tei xml http://www.thomasgray.org/cgi-bin/display.cg...
oh yeah tei xml http://www. thomasgray.
everyone trots out ozymandias when they need to reference...
voice mail tolls the knell of parting day, etc.
voice mail tolls the knell of parting day, etc.
somehow my world always returns to late nights in...
yeah and the blue glowy brains and stuff i was pretty sigh
does it come with a special keyboard
there's a whole container thing going on it's really...
building
the cups for candy are really too big given the name on the...
I did not eat a full cup of Mike & Ike's today.
I did not eat a full cup of Mike &amp; Ike's today.
give this a try http://www.thepolylife.com/
@SteveBurnsAlive give this a try http://www. thepolylife.
i will totally read this!
@sixfoot6 i will totally read this!
this is an excellent taxonomy of internet chum by @mahon_e...
this is an excellent taxonomy of internet chum by @mahon_e http://www. theawl.
and sometimes the bar eats you
MINKEL on BELMONT http://www.newrepublic.com/article/121970/...
MINKEL on BELMONT http://www. newrepublic.
that dog would spill for a biscuit come on
imagine a boston trying to keep ANY secret
this is cracking me up because brindles would be like I AM...
is this conversation on or off the sofa
what about regarding boston terriers
That is amazing and wonderful. Good for you both.
@waxpancake @message @xoxo That is amazing and wonderful. Good for you both.
it's good content
what is happening
why is this so funny this is like the funniest thing i've...
that was the plan but carbs took over story of my fuckin...
it's fine i'm here tweeting i should have gone and gotten a...
i can help
i ate the pretzels and peanut butter and as a result the...
Does your firewall block Google docs?
@tomscocca @leahfinnegan Does your firewall block Google docs?
orange and green beans actually i wisely put pb in a small...
also the negotiation about when you should go to the...
it's like 90 minutes from spirulina shake to the kind of...
every ten minutes you wait to order, your choice gets one...
The worst is while you wait for them to heat your...
@ravisomaiya The worst is while you wait for them to heat your half-day-old panini and you walk the empty aisles going, “maybe gummi bears.
It's time sensitive, right? There's mid-day forage, the...
@ravisomaiya It's time sensitive, right? There's mid-day forage, the Bazzini fast-track, the Seamless shame spiral, and the 2AM bodega bomb.
I feel most vulnerable carrying hot beverages down the...
I feel most vulnerable carrying hot beverages down the semicircular escalator.
given the materials you work with it would immediately lead...
I keep spilling small amounts of beverage everywhere...
I keep spilling small amounts of beverage everywhere because I have no instinct for the tensile strength of the corporate cup system.
For deadline lunch I'm having pretzels, a banana, fresh...
For deadline lunch I'm having pretzels, a banana, fresh peanut butter, an orange, green beans, and soda, spread out over five paper cups.
I feel this way about soda machines, coffee dispensers,...
I feel this way about soda machines, coffee dispensers, faucets in general, and the prosciutto generator that I'm under NDA not to disclose.
I sort of feel that the peanut-butter machine should be...
I sort of feel that the peanut-butter machine should be like a treadmill where you wear a clip and if you get blown black it'll stop.
It's very important it STOPS making peanut butter.
@soypunk It's very important it STOPS making peanut butter.
Whenever I try a new dispensing machine I have a definite...
Whenever I try a new dispensing machine I have a definite Sorcerer's-Apprentice sensation. What if it never stops making peanut butter?
Someone helped me use the peanut-butter machine here in the...
Someone helped me use the peanut-butter machine here in the media skyscraper today. “It's the green button,” they said.
if you are a nerd who finds media platform$ fascinating you...
if you are a nerd who finds media platform$ fascinating you will find this kinja post by @joeljohnson fascinating http://gawker.
Businessweek copy desk is not playing.
Businessweek copy desk is not playing.
Wasn't this already done with Rumble by Link Wray?
@PJVogt Wasn't this already done with Rumble by Link Wray?
♫ Oh the pundit is a person in your media, in your media,...
♫ Oh the pundit is a person in your media, in your media, in your me-di-a!
“I smoldered on.” The best line of 2012–2019....
“I smoldered on. ” The best line of 2012–2019.
Content is coming.
Content is coming.
not really but mo puts up with a lot
Honestly if you guys want four days in Spain go do it, I'll...
@AnnaHolmes @maureenflaherty Honestly if you guys want four days in Spain go do it, I'll pay.
when it works though it will be the sweetest thing
turns out
now do it in a browser
but the homophone harum brings to mind centuries of sexual...
2016
comfortable
I'm writing a magazine article about programming and I just...
I'm writing a magazine article about programming and I just hit the part where I want to mention TK and I'm screwed.
I always just call Arecibo whenever I'm going anywhere from...
@maxfenton I always just call Arecibo whenever I'm going anywhere from Ditmas. But I almost always take the train to Newark airport.
being a primate is weird
i keep expecting to look at it and go "oh man I should...
@jackrusher i keep expecting to look at it and go "oh man I should learn elisp" but instead it's like "oh there's some elisp.
it's so weird that i can just read elisp now
But what if she was a dolphin?
@vhgalvao But what if she was a dolphin?
No Siri, I don't want ‘seafood restaurants near me.’ / Are...
No Siri, I don't want ‘seafood restaurants near me. ’ / Are you sure?
what if siri was dolphins
ulgh
true
saying it's 420 am alone in a dark room when you can't...
“MY WEBSITE is 20 years old today.”...
“MY WEBSITE is 20 years old today. ” http://www.
YES
oh...yes, this is true!
@uffe1974 @kjhealy oh... yes, this is true!
yes! tufte does use them a lot. got it.
@kjhealy yes! tufte does use them a lot.
what is the name of the chart where there are two columns...
i am a data visualization expert...
i am a data visualization expert https://twitter.
This is great.
@shabbychef This is great.
i can kind of see you going cyc tho, or pinger
http://claritaluzian.tumblr.com/post/112166493153/a-tribute-...
http://claritaluzian. tumblr.
https://open.spotify.com/track/2Pt5DjPrLmq5Sn4ZGFH1ih
@mariabustillos @laura_june https://open. spotify.
i guess we could have predicted that the capitalism endgame...
there is a whole economy of simulated labor
so far
we've been faking the wrong things
what if tumblr was just a vehicle for branded content...
what if tumblr was just a vehicle for branded content promoting digital tv shows? what if facebook was for only for ads?
did you really quit the times? now you'll always wonder.
@harrisj did you really quit the times? now you'll always wonder.
it's so much sadder too
if people are optimistic, engaged, learning new skills, and...
i'm afraid to look out the window in case nothing is there
what if all the companies are fake
The Office meets The Matrix
“Some of the faux companies even hold strikes.”
“Some of the faux companies even hold strikes.
“They also receive virtual salaries to spend within the...
“They also receive virtual salaries to spend within the make-believe economy. ” http://www.
i mean this is it right this is how it ends
oh god oh god oh god http://www.nytimes.com/2015/05/31/busin...
oh god oh god oh god http://www. nytimes.
No matter what my self-conception, I have a suspicion I'd...
No matter what my self-conception, I have a suspicion I'd enjoy Pitch Perfect II.
i know it seems unlikely, almost shocking, but the same...
http://www.rfwiz.com/Frequencies/Maine/Maine_Cumberland.htm...
@rustyk5 http://www. rfwiz.
gqrx
lol
But don't stop trying!
@rustyk5 @AGoldmund But don't stop trying!
miss u, winter
Nicki Minaj Bar Mitzvah works well descriptively, like,...
Nicki Minaj Bar Mitzvah works well descriptively, like, this is a real NMBM situation we got right here.
taxi medallions paid for that nicki minaj bar mitzvah are...
@anildash @richziade @BilldeBlasio taxi medallions paid for that nicki minaj bar mitzvah are we really ready to give that up?
I love buses
please tax all cars $2000/yr
rich what have you done
Funeral Evites.
Funeral Evites.
people need to chill out it was just a $30 hot dog
yeah i mean this, it is...substantive if terrible
@thebitterstweet yeah i mean this, it is...
where do I begin? no i mean literally i can't select the...
@thebitterstweet where do I begin? no i mean literally i can't select the beginning of the article for some reason.
john
it turns out i have strong feelings about adobe-based...
all of the acronyms https://twitter.com/Balisage/status/6036...
all of the acronyms https://twitter.
I mean when birds seek to destroy pig infrastructure who...
I mean when birds seek to destroy pig infrastructure who really wins? Slingshot makers.
What if it's two hours of bird/pig truth and reconciliation...
What if it's two hours of bird/pig truth and reconciliation in the hope of a better future?
I mean it has to be basically!
@rustyk5 @bn2b I mean it has to be basically!
THEY KILLED MY FAMILY. [scene of bird slaughter at hooves...
THEY KILLED MY FAMILY. [scene of bird slaughter at hooves of pigs] [pan up to reveal slingshot] THE PIGS...
I'm thinking about the coming Angry Birds movie since @bn2b...
I'm thinking about the coming Angry Birds movie since @bn2b mentioned it. Like what if it's just, extreme pig/bird violence for two hours.
One thing I forgot about giant companies is the sensation...
One thing I forgot about giant companies is the sensation when you leave the office and touch your neck but nothing is there—ghost lanyard.
Excellent and deeply-felt context by @textfiles for...
Excellent and deeply-felt context by @textfiles for understanding the MAME emulation system http://ascii. textfiles.
I worked open-plan today which I haven't done in a while....
I worked open-plan today which I haven't done in a while. Due to one headphone jack slippage I had a mild disruptive Quadron leak.
at one pt i went on all 4s and let the children climb up to...
or 36,000 pages on my phone
i needed 800 pages of pure mindscrubbing in between drafts...
people are being fussy about the last third of the book but...
OH MY FUCKING GOD
what are skids
It was the result of a secret government program known only...
@bn2b It was the result of a secret government program known only as EYELINER ULTRA. Today, only some goths remain.
now i want to go get coffee and everyone is going to assume...
what if there are goths in our stairwells
A mole sent me all the secret crying spots in this...
A mole sent me all the secret crying spots in this building, it's wonderful except I'm afraid of what I'll find. What if it's Morrissey?
but all the agua fresca you can drink
is this real
my children are so ahead of the game
wow defense contracting has changed
No but the EXECUTIVE crying nooks.
@iboudway No but the EXECUTIVE crying nooks.
Not if they are used to fill the enormous aquariums.
@jwherrman Not if they are used to fill the enormous aquariums.
One good thing about being overweight is that no one can...
One good thing about being overweight is that no one can see your laptop screen.
c.f. https://medium.com/message/writing-on-medium-88a5e99d86...
c. f.
I mean...I don't think they are! Like, I asked about my...
@rustyk5 I mean... I don't think they are!
Also right now today I'm working in a giant open-plan...
Also right now today I'm working in a giant open-plan office and I keep wondering, where are the crying nooks?
i know! it is very confusing.
@palinode i know! it is very confusing.
i kept meaning to tweet that all weekend and tit was like...
Oh and to be clear it did that two years ago.
Oh and to be clear it did that two years ago.
I have some news about Medium: Medium gave me a brief...
I have some news about Medium: Medium gave me a brief contract with clear rights, pays me when I write, and lets me write about ANYTHING.
actually it's neither of those things but point taken
what if a magazine gave you unlimited paul ford
No one should write about programming; it's impossible....
No one should write about programming; it's impossible. https://twitter.
Maybe instead of saying “make it so easy that your mom can...
Maybe instead of saying “make it so easy that your mom can use it,” say “make it so easy that a senior executive can use it.
wow that url obliterated twitter's regexp
“The reality has been more complex” is how the New York...
“The reality has been more complex” is how the New York Times says “BOHICA.
I do this too! It's the devil's bargain. But it makes me...
@kylemcauley I do this too! It's the devil's bargain.
omg you're totally right
Any sufficiently advanced object model is indistinguishable...
Any sufficiently advanced object model is indistinguishable from garbage.
ULGH
I have, myself, paused Band of Brothers to buy electronic...
@rustyk5 I have, myself, paused Band of Brothers to buy electronic equipment.
i basically just hit undo until i'm back to a blank page...
I mean, yes, but also I'd argue it's good to draw a...
@merveille I mean, yes, but also I'd argue it's good to draw a semantic distinction between workaround and solution.
u shouldn't have to know weird sekrits to use mass...
didja get the NooElec R820T2 SDR &DVB-GT NESDR Mini 2?...
@rustyk5 didja get the NooElec R820T2 SDR &amp;DVB-GT NESDR Mini 2?
pages is good!
@bennyfactor pages is good!
omg ⌥_(ツ)_/¯
Has there ever been a bigger “we UX people completely give...
Has there ever been a bigger “we UX people completely give up” than the “OPTION key” symbol? ⌥⌥⌥ (Is it an oblique Mac happy face?
“Find the COMMAND key. Now find the OPTION key. Now the...
“Find the COMMAND key. Now find the OPTION key.
srsly tho that is moonspeak to humans, it says BACKWARDS...
Right but then I have to remember how to paste formatted...
@Jermolene Right but then I have to remember how to paste formatted which I also sometimes really want.
Yep but paste-at-a-time.
@blidt Yep but paste-at-a-time.
Keyboard commands are lore, not interface.
Keyboard commands are lore, not interface.
YESMODES
Every Office-style software program should have a "paste...
Every Office-style software program should have a "paste only as flat text" button that can be ON or OFF. https://twitter.
I just told a child, “you can make your own TV show in your...
I just told a child, “you can make your own TV show in your heart.
you can also boil the pizza in gravy
this is real
no @rustyk5 shares that opinion
The new Neal Stephenson is not for everyone but it's pure...
The new Neal Stephenson is not for everyone but it's pure joy for fans of multiple bolide impacts.
I think a lot of news should prob just be delivered in...
Check out my maunderings
I just inspiringly wandered to buy Coors Light.
I just inspiringly wandered to buy Coors Light.
Get inspired by my wanderings https://twitter.com/tnr/statu...
Get inspired by my wanderings https://twitter.
Man technology sure turns people into self-entitled angry...
Man technology sure turns people into self-entitled angry asshole narcissists. I'm talking about cars, though.
I heard the crunch
“GitHub didn’t invent version control by a long shit.” is a...
“GitHub didn’t invent version control by a long shit. ” is a typo I just found.
this whole conversation was basically me trolling you
:thumbsupslownod:
I absolutely do.
@octothorpe I absolutely do.
Open question: Which prog rock band is best to listen to...
Open question: Which prog rock band is best to listen to when you are weaving shit into your beard?
When I started programming it was like I was trapped inside...
When I started programming it was like I was trapped inside a weird invisible glass box, but I learned I was just using the wrong mime type.
guys thanks for letting me know there are other word...
genie i'm free of horizontal lines in macword
In MacWord get rid of a horiz line: Select the line, Format...
In MacWord get rid of a horiz line: Select the line, Format &gt; Borders and Shading, select None, OKAY. tx @FurbleScout https://twitter.
I DID IT I DID IT
?
@FurbleScout ?
maybe not on a mac :/
maybe we can have them back if we wish hard enough
danya why
nothing on earth is more resistant to change than a...
finally https://medium.com/technology-musings/the-annotated-...
finally https://medium.
how many times have you erased your account now
probably expired
:)
"terrible" might be a leeeeetle strong here
not me
just out of editorial curiosity i diffed my edit of "how to...
just out of editorial curiosity i diffed my edit of "how to be polite" with the reader's digest version https://www. diffchecker.
the sequel is called the male glaze it's about donuts
When people show affection like this I go, WAIT, DO I HAVE...
@textfiles When people show affection like this I go, WAIT, DO I HAVE A TERRIBLE DARK SECRET? But my basement family says I'm nice.
we could talk about binary packing algorithms and the...
i'm a terrible person
i mean it's doesn't link all human knowledge together but...
i mean it's doesn't link all human knowledge together but look at this CONTENT https://projects. propublica.
“Never will you want something more than to untangle the...
“Never will you want something more than to untangle the necklace. ” — @page88 #1675 --share-71-136" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.
hahahahahaahhahaahsaiphg'ewpihr'pewihrgp'hewr
wow you read those
I mean its got space shit instead of sailing ships so I'm...
@rustyk5 @Choire I mean its got space shit instead of sailing ships so I'm in.
“My new cloud mostly works.” http://www.newrepublic.com/arti...
“My new cloud mostly works. ” http://www.
the desperate need to brag smashes into the charming desire...
wow
This is cool. https://twitter.com/brianoberkirch/status/6011...
This is cool. https://twitter.
whoa!
@brianoberkirch whoa!
even crab rangoon
Dramatic staged reenactment of syrupy tot dumpling...
Dramatic staged reenactment of syrupy tot dumpling affections https://instagram.
I did EVERYTHING wrong
oh no its worse my primary income is as a freelance writer...
what is going outside
oh god yes
We are raising our children to acknowledge, respect, and...
We are raising our children to acknowledge, respect, and celebrate ALL dumplings.
3yo twin A: "you are my dim sum." 3yo twin B: "you are my...
3yo twin A: "you are my dim sum. " 3yo twin B: "you are my pelmeni.
this is great https://medium.com/@johndevore/i-quit-drinking...
this is great @johndevore /i-quit-drinking-5-years-ago-today-and-i-ve-been-insufferable-ever-since-b7a72cfb3b1f" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.
http://www.theonion.com/article/study-average-father-thinks-...
http://www. theonion.
my computer is 5000 degrees rn
holy shit
whoa
NICE
how do people feel when you just end a tweet with a comma,
yeah the medium comments functionality on that post is...
guys we are old men yelling at clouds
you are naming your hard drive wrong...
you are naming your hard drive wrong https://medium.
It's good advice!
@tcarmody It's good advice!
I just sometimes wish they could acknowledge that they ARE...
@krylon I just sometimes wish they could acknowledge that they ARE welcomed? Anyway nothing much has happened, I'm just waiting.
I understand completely. I kind of love it though, people...
@krylon I understand completely. I kind of love it though, people are welcome to criticize me all they want.
my essay is this dog rn https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/60...
my essay is this dog rn https://twitter.
Yesterday someone pointed out how rare it is for someone...
Yesterday someone pointed out how rare it is for someone outside of poetry to write about poetry. Today I find out why.
Approve all the comments and let god sort them out.
Approve all the comments and let god sort them out.
Right?
@jacqui Right?
also nybr has an amazing and lovingly-tended website that...
no one mention wikipedia it'll get awk
So @garychou teaches a great class at @svaixd and he gave a...
So @garychou teaches a great class at @svaixd and he gave a great commencement speech, too @garychou /the-thesis-after-your-thesis-62c47d3a4c0a" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.
this is great!
@invisiblecomma this is great!
No I know that was what I thought of immediately too.
@rustyk5 @ProPublica No I know that was what I thought of immediately too.
oh god this is the first of three
also he proposes that @propublica implement the memex
I can Nazi the resemblance
“there are plenty of entertaining nuggets in the book”...
“there are plenty of entertaining nuggets in the book” http://www. theguardian.
exactly
less said about that the better
I hope that when it comes to Genesis listening you can...
@AGoldmund I hope that when it comes to Genesis listening you can “Turn It On Again” instead of “Throwing it all away.
You appear to be living in a “land of confusion” here....
@AGoldmund You appear to be living in a “land of confusion” here. “That's all.
venmo me a dollar and i will give you 20% of my cats'...
is "bad" a genre
jesus christ they have a lot of hits BUT they are all Cars...
I'm glad I could “Shake it up” for you
“Don't go to Pieces,” maybe you need to “Drive” to the...
@AGoldmund “Don't go to Pieces,” maybe you need to “Drive” to the store and pick up a copy of “Duke” and let the “Good Times Roll.
one of those novelty “in case of emergency break glass”...
wow cutting carbs sux amirite 😖😖😖 [rapid hulk breathing]...
snarklines
I mean little charts are so good
oh yeah situational composition environments that's the...
ephemeralist duh
I mean I write software so I can pursue radically...
@egabbert @accommodatingly @anindita I mean I write software so I can pursue radically epehemeralist composition https://www. youtube.
guys i am an excellent poet it's just that my chosen form...
jordan flarf is just how poets do twitter bots i love flarf
nono i grew up in it and know how weird it seems when...
[sliding in helllOOOO] i mean for me it's all about...
The Spotify/Sony contract hooooooo doggies:...
The Spotify/Sony contract hooooooo doggies: http://www. theverge.
here you go https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yyj5GuXuaos
here you go https://www. youtube.
WOW
Personal hygiene tubing.
@SteveBurnsAlive Personal hygiene tubing.
You could have a library with teensy tiny books.
@SteveBurnsAlive You could have a library with teensy tiny books.
Imagine all the time you could spend customizing your truck.
@SteveBurnsAlive Imagine all the time you could spend customizing your truck.
You would have so much fun.
@SteveBurnsAlive You would have so much fun.
I want to live in a truck http://boingboing.net/2015/05/19/h...
I want to live in a truck http://boingboing. net/2015/05/19/how-to-know-if-the-overland-ex.
I would LURVE that
But this is soooooooo Internet. Although the scope of focus...
@michelet But this is soooooooo Internet. Although the scope of focus (i.
“(even Anonymous has a name)” — @ftrain...
“(even Anonymous has a name)” — @ftrain #0817 --share-367-394" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium. com/message/a-no-to-poem-6f5d7aea9f15?
i mean self-aware networks of intestinal nanobots with...
right because their entire room will be smeared with...
@kthread right because their entire room will be smeared with CompuGel.
I will lock them in the bedroom and take away their...
@kthread I will lock them in the bedroom and take away their manifestos.
“I doubt that 85 years will eradicate the cultural need for...
“I doubt that 85 years will eradicate the cultural need for feminism, activism, or poetry. ” #37da --share-290-390" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.
“The poem is 3,712 words of free verse, an average of 14...
“The poem is 3,712 words of free verse, an average of 14 words per line. ” — @ftrain #8a84 --share-200-271" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.
I wrote for The Message today about a very interesting...
I wrote for The Message today about a very interesting collectively-written poem that appeared a few weeks ago: https://medium.
i hav dremes ware im been chaste
wurst draems
One of the healthiest ways I've found to handle stress is...
One of the healthiest ways I've found to handle stress is to flutter your hands compulsively while saying the words “I hate all cubes.
i m a disatser
I'm here for you Greg.
@gregorg I'm here for you Greg.
A “No to” Poem
Not long ago the poet Anne Boyer tweeted a link to a poem. I went and read the poem, which was on page 221 of this PDF published by the Chicago Review , and I went, whoa.
Imagine the guest-host nightmare that will be the final...
Imagine the guest-host nightmare that will be the final season of SNL.
isn't that just blogging?
@chaykak @theodoreross isn't that just blogging?
no you support my kickstarter
do they have it in 2xl
YES this is how PR people sometimes write what in God's name
true!
@cwarzel true!
you. know. what. makes. things. really. horrible. to. read?
you. know.
spotistalking. is. not. okay.
@cwarzel spotistalking. is.
stop upskirting me charlie
GLENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN! I think about that conversation...
@glenn_mcdonald GLENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN! I think about that conversation a lot since I learned Clojure!
she was a good girl
you know who else loved hitler
Hah. I'll take the 5% earworm rate!
@jackrusher Hah. I'll take the 5% earworm rate!
get that meaning
omg http://beta.radiooooo.com/
omg http://beta. radiooooo.
what my god
This http://musicmachinery.com/ blog is super-good too.
This http://musicmachinery. com/ blog is super-good too.
very cool!
@avoision very cool!
This by Chris Lago, https://open.spotify.com/track/6SgmgDISm...
This by Chris Lago, https://open. spotify.
Here's the playlist: https://open.spotify.com/user/thesounds...
Here's the playlist: https://open. spotify.
I listen to an embarrassing number of “what's new”...
I listen to an embarrassing number of “what's new” playlists and that Needle playlist has a great hit-to-dud ratio.
After I wrote about Spotify for @tnr I discovered this...
After I wrote about Spotify for @tnr I discovered this engineer's blog; he's done great work finding “emerging music” http://furia.
Reading “This is what it's like to be charged by a hippo”...
Reading “This is what it's like to be charged by a hippo” on Medium my 1st thought was “Stripe is branching out. ” @blprnt /this-is-what-it-is-like-to-be-charged-by-a-hippopotamus-aa3b7bf320ef" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.
Oh I wonder what @blprnt is up to oh he's in Angola doing...
Oh I wonder what @blprnt is up to oh he's in Angola doing open hippo data (and a lot more) @blprnt /this-is-what-it-is-like-to-be-charged-by-a-hippopotamus-aa3b7bf320ef" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.
According to their FAQ, it's just related searches--but I...
@osulop According to their FAQ, it's just related searches--but I just discovered http://furia. com/ which shows how they use it.
It's a great way to keep in touch and judge your friends.
@maura It's a great way to keep in touch and judge your friends.
so all these years I've known you, you're actually a...
@leahfinnegan so all these years I've known you, you're actually a princess?
typical welfare queen
maybe there's a union discount
if you work it right they just send you stuff
What if at the end of the movie Don jumps out a window but...
You know who else didn't care about the conclusion to Mad...
@rustyk5 You know who else didn't care about the conclusion to Mad Men?
patriarchal technocracy has been good to me
its fine except for the robot freegan potlucks
all my robot ladies come out as intersectional feminists...
no
I have watched this video twenty times...
I have watched this video twenty times https://youtu.
is it like all fancy or can he get spicy maki combo I guess...
she makes sushi? That would save me like $50/week
@leahfinnegan she makes sushi?
niiice
oh hey jim
maybe the 2020s will be the 80s we have been waiting for?
@Choire maybe the 2020s will be the 80s we have been waiting for?
I was thinking that the letterset 1890s artisinal thing was...
@Choire I was thinking that the letterset 1890s artisinal thing was very 70s too.
To be clear I have nothing against beards I'm just amazed...
To be clear I have nothing against beards I'm just amazed they are still here.
My father was born in 1932 and he told me in the late 1980s...
My father was born in 1932 and he told me in the late 1980s that sometimes he just thought of men with beards and laughed.
Its been so long though.
Its been so long though.
One day who knows when beards will be out.
One day who knows when beards will be out.
I tried to talk to people who lived through the 1991...
I tried to talk to people who lived through the 1991 Thirtysomething finale to learn what's next but the nurses wouldn't let me on the ward.
manageable
leah I used to write mad men crit for slate I got this
you soooo dont have to
cool I ACED that thing
Writers: Tonight is a great night to give an editor bad...
Writers: Tonight is a great night to give an editor bad news.
as a contrib ed its expected right?
@leahfinnegan as a contrib ed its expected right?
Tonight is the recapper's Superbowl.
Tonight is the recapper's Superbowl.
What if the finale is about a couple who planned to watch...
What if the finale is about a couple who planned to watch it together but after a series of comic mishaps they live a life of unhappiness.
Is this the finale to mad men
Other People’s Playlists
the answer is obviously self-driving prisons
brian it's beautiful outside don't be this guy
Sometimes I look at my children and I feel my heart melting...
Sometimes I look at my children and I feel my heart melting and I know that my heart is not steel beams and that their love is not jet fuel.
Saturday mornings are reserved for group 4—did you not get...
@shani_o Saturday mornings are reserved for group 4—did you not get the sign-up sheet? I pulled your things out and put them in a bag.
I mean no one who could say that could be a bad person in...
@Choire I mean no one who could say that could be a bad person in any way.
“But for ruminants, you know, the grass is always greener.”
@Choire “But for ruminants, you know, the grass is always greener.
I wonder if AirBNB asked anyone before it sponsored the...
I wonder if AirBNB asked anyone before it sponsored the Brooklyn half-marathon or if it just put up the website and waited.
all parrots are my friends
I'll do that
fair
whoa that lizard is wayyyy toooo big
leah if you were a nurse would you wear these...
@mariabustillos @leahfinnegan leah if you were a nurse would you wear these https://instagram.
cool scrubs https://instagram.com/fortheloveofscrubs/
@mariabustillos @leahfinnegan cool scrubs https://instagram.
guys http://scrubsmag.com/
@mariabustillos @leahfinnegan guys http://scrubsmag.
these were pretty nice scrubs tbh, they were clearly...
it was like they were on twitter but in real life
it's like what we do but these are real people with actual...
and she went i'm 32 basically it was cute nurses burning...
the lady nurse was making fun of the dude nurse for being a...
@leahfinnegan the lady nurse was making fun of the dude nurse for being a dude.
rubbing it in is just mean
leah i know that
Which was cool because I was wearing my Baudrillard-brand...
Which was cool because I was wearing my Baudrillard-brand boxer briefs.
Some of the nurses at the doctor's were wearing Grey's...
Some of the nurses at the doctor's were wearing Grey's Anatomy-brand scrubs today. http://www.
yall had a very different kind of grandfather than I did
sorry if i ruffled your feathers
skipped right over dad humor into granddad this is not a...
parrots in an open relationship will accept a cockatoo
they're in an open relationship and everyone accepts a...
don't make this complicated laurie
Right maybe we just all need monkeys.
@symptomatic Right maybe we just all need monkeys.
My friend and his wife are in a relationship with their...
My friend and his wife are in a relationship with their parrot, they are crackeramorous.
which word is it?
@katzish which word is it?
It's an important question: Can shoulder pets survive in a...
It's an important question: Can shoulder pets survive in a world of smartphones, emotional support animals, extreme tattooes, and SSRIs?
I just assumed it had become a massive 3/4-square mile wine...
I just assumed it had become a massive 3/4-square mile wine bar.
That's crazy I had no idea the West Village is still there.
That's crazy I had no idea the West Village is still there.
I'm getting tweeted reports of a lot of shoulder pets...
I'm getting tweeted reports of a lot of shoulder pets coming in now (looks down at papers, then up at camera) possibly in the West Village.
she may be a lizard
Nothing says “I need extreme amounts of attention, but at a...
Nothing says “I need extreme amounts of attention, but at a minimum distance of eight feet,” like a large bird or lizard on your body.
that's good, that's promising
that's comforting
maybe smartphones killed shoulder pets
that's comforting
in general it feels like weird shoulder pets is no longer a...
are there still people with pet shoulder lizards in nyc it...
I think @jwherrman should run native ads and I should be in...
@fmanjoo I think @jwherrman should run native ads and I should be in charge of QA for Scoop, but instead of bug reports I write essays.
I liked the original Content Wars but hated the prequels.
I liked the original Content Wars but hated the prequels.
i will add this to my linkedin
he is really cool tho
I found out when they asked me to remove my own name on the...
harper's made me contrib then removed me but didn't tell me
a contributing editor writes periodically, supports his or...
DOXX
Tim you really are and I just couldn't do it.
@timothymeaney Tim you really are and I just couldn't do it.
the answer, as always, is micropayments
Sorry to be clear that's not ironic.
@thejefflarson @harrisj Sorry to be clear that's not ironic.
I allude to type conversion in a forthcoming Businessweek...
@thejefflarson @harrisj I allude to type conversion in a forthcoming Businessweek piece.
:cool-kid-thumbs-up-nodding:
there is literally no guidebook for these situations (picks...
i know that tweeting out a press release about myself...
Hi I'm writing a column about DATABASES for The New...
Hi I'm writing a column about DATABASES for The New Republic ask me how to fix your iPhone http://www. adweek.
Gonna write about databases and it's gonna be COOOOOOOOOL.
@guyvidra Gonna write about databases and it's gonna be COOOOOOOOOL.
these dynamically generated spotify playlists are...
these dynamically generated spotify playlists are gooooooood http://www. furia.
:thumbsup:
Could god make a house so tiny no one could blog it?
Could god make a house so tiny no one could blog it?
http://giphy.com/gifs/fire-computers-burn-it-down-zcchHpCm44...
@jamiekeiles @caseyjohnston http://giphy.
muting
that's terrible
i mean *I'M* the bargain bin paul ford
they are being goofy your voice is great and hilarious the...
look i'm not going to pretend that this is not incredibly...
i'm sorry we ruined publishing for you
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA no nooooooooooooooooo that can't be real
kid can write http://thehairpin.com/2015/05/a-millennial-rev...
kid can write http://thehairpin.
I think they will believe us if we just show up in...
Elon Musk is basically devising a plan for all humanity....
Elon Musk is basically devising a plan for all humanity. Hope you like it!
“I am intolerable right now” should be considered a valid...
“I am intolerable right now” should be considered a valid excuse for skipping a party.
Before the flame deluge there were two kinds of...
@kjhealy @john_overholt Before the flame deluge there were two kinds of people—First-Pagers, and the scholars, known as Whole-Articles.
I read it Bilderboard magazine
Horst Wessel lied went to #1
leah "Nazi pets in order of guilt"
leah do u want a million hits
I'm laughing so hard I'm crying.
@leahfinnegan I'm laughing so hard I'm crying.
she was only following odors!
@leahfinnegan she was only following odors!
blondi was blameless
the only government acronym that means anything is USA
oh hell yes
Just a pleasant day in extreme air conditioning watching...
Just a pleasant day in extreme air conditioning watching smart people demo cool interactive products.
At #thegraduateshow15 with the awesome students of @svaixd...
At #thegraduateshow15 with the awesome students of @svaixd who are READY FOR THE WORLD.
oh they come and go and chat.
@horse_mans @cfenollosa oh they come and go and chat.
oh yeah big chunks of failure down the failure drain
so much easier to cut
Every word I write is one less word I have to write.
Every word I write is one less word I have to write.
hare my fun. Sorry that cut off.
hare my fun. Sorry that cut off.
Reader's Digest says that I have perfect manners so you can...
oh I just bought a copy all that is goooone
Tumblr is a great place to use meth with your friends...
Tumblr is a great place to use meth with your friends online http://motherboard. vice.
Leslie Harpold had to be dead for like eight years before...
@PJVogt Leslie Harpold had to be dead for like eight years before they'd allow it.
oh fun
no, no i consented to syndication. no control over...
@goldfine @joeld no, no i consented to syndication. no control over titles/edits on syndication.
And everyone hates the documentation team.
And everyone hates the documentation team.
I read this and assume that the mail team hates the...
I read this and assume that the mail team hates the hangouts team so, so, so, so much. https://twitter.
At some point in our lifetime there will be a real live...
At some point in our lifetime there will be a real live physical Museum of Twitter.
i know i know but you don't even need two phones
it's text, works on the web, displays markdown beautifully...
oh god laura I swear to god this is real, you should just...
this is your solution
there's no way to start over we can just go on
seriously a mac se with a fucking floppy disk it was easier
jesus i thought it was just me
Also I need to sit here and make jokes about a major...
@MikeIsaac Also I need to sit here and make jokes about a major telecom/content acquisition for a while, that's just what I am.
there are PEOPLE who work there mike
They'll let you back in when they hire you.
@leahfinnegan They'll let you back in when they hire you.
Everyone worried about HuffPo needs to stop crying like a...
Everyone worried about HuffPo needs to stop crying like a big distressed baby.
Today: Verizon buys Aol. Tomorrow: “Guys, we've been over...
Today: Verizon buys Aol. Tomorrow: “Guys, we've been over this.
“Hi. I'm having some trouble with my journalism today.”...
“Hi. I'm having some trouble with my journalism today.
If you can't trust Verizon's editorial judgment, what can...
If you can't trust Verizon's editorial judgment, what can you trust?
first I saw it, or that title. My god.
@joeld first I saw it, or that title. My god.
Oh no
guys I was joking JOKING
let me know if I can help
omg dooooo it
this is such a strong idea
lol
doesn't tell me which sport has the dumbest fans though
Seriously what are people even doing with those Knight...
Seriously what are people even doing with those Knight Foundation grants?
Why even have data journalism if no one can answer this...
Why even have data journalism if no one can answer this question?
Which sport has the dumbest fans?
Which sport has the dumbest fans?
I miss documents software is exhausting
actually tho calling Saxon from clojure and evalling XPath...
@jacqui @fhwang @harrisj @fidothe actually tho calling Saxon from clojure and evalling XPath is suuuuper sweet.
guys when I need tree transforming JVM parasite languages I...
@jacqui @fhwang @harrisj @fidothe guys when I need tree transforming JVM parasite languages I go with Clojure.
this is what the truth sounds like...
this is what the truth sounds like http://typedrummer.
you guys keep joking but i'm using org-mode with pandoc to...
that would be great tbh
guys it's in org-mode i'll just make a private repo
Oh no I do a lot of non-writing work so that I can actually...
@leahfinnegan Oh no I do a lot of non-writing work so that I can actually be middle class, by having two jobs I'm able to WAIT, GODDAMMIT.
I love that this is the story as opposed to the decline...
@leahfinnegan I love that this is the story as opposed to the decline itself.
The decline of the middle class is making it hard to...
The decline of the middle class is making it hard to politicians to know what to call poor people http://www. nytimes.
Oh wow this is a huge article about WHAT IS CODE so it...
@harrisj Oh wow this is a huge article about WHAT IS CODE so it actually is partially about bikeshedding!
Man, people sure are less willing to give advice on an...
Man, people sure are less willing to give advice on an article draft when it's 38,000 words long.
one person eating a meal alone in stench car is also a...
I don't think that there any win95 browsers with emscripten...
@rustyk5 @waxpancake I don't think that there any win95 browsers with emscripten support, but at the same time this question is now valid.
u can run windows 95 in a browser now...
u can run windows 95 in a browser now http://win95. ajf.
Nothing in programming is more pernicious than the myth of...
Nothing in programming is more pernicious than the myth of the 10x manager.
omfg that dog
it's soooo gooood
“because they can't find a working driver,” wiping away 22...
THESE banners? Thanks, they're by Figlet.
THESE banners? Thanks, they're by Figlet.
oh wow gnu apl mode is crazy https://twitter.com/ftrain/stat...
oh wow gnu apl mode is crazy https://twitter.
come and use it to teach classes i mean
I still want to come us it for classes. Once my book draft...
@nelson I still want to come us it for classes. Once my book draft is done.
I would never stoop to mere pastiche.
@mat @PJVogt @oliviataters @twitter I would never stoop to mere pastiche.
Yeah I mean HMMMMMMMM right? I mean it's a folly and it's...
@nelson Yeah I mean HMMMMMMMM right? I mean it's a folly and it's fine.
♬She may hide forever in the streams of @twitter / she's...
@PJVogt @oliviataters ♬She may hide forever in the streams of @twitter / she's the bot who never returned.
wait what is happening I am afk
I question the capitalist, patriarchal society that ...
I question the capitalist, patriarchal society that forces me to get up early with the kids to make this omelet.
Deep down aren't we all lost children? Is a terrible thing...
Deep down aren't we all lost children? Is a terrible thing for a shopping center security guard to say.
Oh @twitter why did you kill @oliviataters she was the best...
How they get you beer at Madison Square Garden:...
How they get you beer at Madison Square Garden: http://brewreview. com/blog/madison-square-garden-has-an-impressive-beer-system/ (38 miles of tubing).
What was the riddle?
@bn2b What was the riddle?
When Elton John came out to a journalist in NYC:...
When Elton John came out to a journalist in NYC: https://medium.
I mean it's more like “radio” than a podcast, you know?
@rustyk5 @PJVogt I mean it's more like “radio” than a podcast, you know?
“I'm just going to the bathroom and I may be some time.”
@PJVogt “I'm just going to the bathroom and I may be some time.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IyqEVoK4xoE
@rustyk5 @cwarzel https://www. youtube.
PostgreSQL...landed...upsert http://git.postgresql.org/gitwe...
PostgreSQL... landed...
the houndstooth is super cool tho
is there a good nyc tailor for fatties i can't mens...
“As your Concise Oxford sails toward me from across the...
“As your Concise Oxford sails toward me from across the room, let’s take some time to consider the arguments. ” @blprnt /data-v-da0e0d24777c" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.
“And, obviously, for Swatches.”...
“And, obviously, for Swatches. ” http://mobile.
Nerds, this is a great video, and it's for a Kim Stanley...
Nerds, this is a great video, and it's for a Kim Stanley Robinson book, so. https://youtu.
right my god who would have had a color terminal
also that “10” just hanging out in there
I wrote a function in FORTRAN for rhetorical purposes &...
I wrote a function in FORTRAN for rhetorical purposes &amp; it's the most computer-looking computer language I've used. https://twitter.
I will make an app that can deliver a stiff drink wherever...
I will make an app that can deliver a stiff drink wherever you are and I will call it FlaskRabbit.
That nail salon article about wage exploitation was amazing...
That nail salon article about wage exploitation was amazing and I can't wait to get my interns to reblog it.
💅👠🙀💰😢
omg it really IS terrible when you whine it
once again poor people foot the bill
What is the worst word to hear whined?
What is the worst word to hear whined?
maybe leah will have twins at gawker
:(
I wonder if the dudes at the garage across the street are...
I wonder if the dudes at the garage across the street are yelling because they are excited about how loud their electric torque wrench is.
I love Quora, it's like the VAX/VMS messageboard in college...
@bn2b @torrez @RodBegbie I love Quora, it's like the VAX/VMS messageboard in college and since I won't log in I can't read too much.
I wonder if this screwed up his Uber offer too, but of...
@bn2b @RodBegbie @torrez I wonder if this screwed up his Uber offer too, but of course they would operate silently.
I mean, Zenefits dude cares about his company and that...
@RodBegbie @bn2b @torrez I mean, Zenefits dude cares about his company and that leaked out a little, I like Zenefits more now.
I mean, like, okay, the CEO shouldn't have done an HR thing...
@bn2b @torrez @RodBegbie I mean, like, okay, the CEO shouldn't have done an HR thing in public, but the original post was soooooo lame.
I mean at some point don't you get to say “how about...
@bn2b @torrez @RodBegbie I mean at some point don't you get to say “how about fuuuuuuuuuuck youuuuuuuu.
Am I wrong for thinking that reply is completely justified...
@bn2b @torrez @RodBegbie Am I wrong for thinking that reply is completely justified and hilarious?
New μ-Ziq album, nerds: https://open.spotify.com/album/68V5E...
New μ-Ziq album, nerds: https://open. spotify.
make the drones dance
This article on creative computing with Clojure is the good...
This article on creative computing with Clojure is the good stuff right here: http://radar. oreilly.
All it's missing is “ad”s!
@AGoldmund All it's missing is “ad”s!
A better word for podcasting would be brocasting.
@AGoldmund A better word for podcasting would be brocasting.
To be fair, the original meaning of podcast was two white...
@AGoldmund To be fair, the original meaning of podcast was two white dudes chuckling about websites for 150 minutes.
i didn't mean to slide in there like it was a baby...
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/596080994677092353/photo/1
@leahfinnegan @jenniferdaniel https://twitter.
that video I'm ovulating
yes
Really glad about this
You see it as ignoring your email but I see it as saving up...
You see it as ignoring your email but I see it as saving up my love.
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/596009371122966528/photo/1
@AGoldmund @PJVogt @imbeccable https://twitter.
and then he did a good interview on BuzzFeeD where had to...
in conclusion he makes monster movies?
@AGoldmund @PJVogt @imbeccable in conclusion he makes monster movies?
and he was like, MASSIVE GLOBAL NUCLEAR EYEROLL
and then g a m e r g a t e peeps were like YOU SEE THEY...
people yelled at him on the internet about his feminism and...
ThinkUp uses PHP tho.
@anildash ThinkUp uses PHP tho.
every year this is less and less my world...
every year this is less and less my world https://twitter.
lol alana my knowledge is spotty but i would hit up...
I deleted that last tweet it shared too much.
I deleted that last tweet it shared too much.
“Stand still so I can yell at you.” —Everyone
“Stand still so I can yell at you.
i mean the way twitter gets you is you think you need it...
and more like, GUESS I'LL LIE IN MY BED OF GOLD WITH A...
i think it was? but the framing was not OMG I CAN'T HANDLE...
@shani_o @jennydeluxe @adambvary i think it was?
u can quit twitter?
@shani_o @adambvary u can quit twitter?
ON IT
the solo all-hands is the #1 meeting in journalism
hahahahah OH GOD i mean i may
sometimes when you're programming you really need to take a...
i've got a book standup going with a mentor. i'm all in...
@seldo i've got a book standup going with a mentor. i'm all in man.
:/
doesn't work for books
it's sort of dispiriting when your project is a year late...
i know this is evil but it's insanely fun to contemplate...
i know this is evil but it's insanely fun to contemplate how it will be used http://www. volkskrant.
oh they get even more insufferable page by page
it's like evil storify
wait this is 11 PAGES of comedian airline tweets...
wait this is 11 PAGES of comedian airline tweets http://splitsider.
never forget http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/ar...
@rustyk5 never forget http://www. washingtonpost.
We call that "The Google Hangout Point."
@rustyk5 We call that "The Google Hangout Point.
this is great http://www.theawl.com/2015/05/leaving-new-york...
this is great http://www. theawl.
i can see that colouring your perceptions
blocked
The Detective rides into the still-smoldering city. “Fans...
The Detective rides into the still-smoldering city. “Fans did this,” she says.
IT DOES NOT BEGW"HJRIP"GHIJPREWRTH
I know it's not the biggest deal but when people misuse...
I know it's not the biggest deal but when people misuse “beg the question,” they sound like they are trying to be smart and my soul dies.
Nice story pal, but let me just...[sound of snapping]...
Nice story pal, but let me just... [sound of snapping] situate that for you.
can we really afford not to let him try?
@laura_june can we really afford not to let him try?
thanks anil I can count on you
important dancon http://www.theawl.com/2015/05/how-to-beat-a...
important dancon http://www. theawl.
zayn
YES
sorry i got it wrong it was page 221 of...
sorry i got it wrong it was page 221 of http://chicagoreview. org/wp-content/uploads/2015/05/59-1-Gender-Forum.
oh duh it was rip this tweet
Remember me this way: https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/5419...
Remember me this way: https://twitter. com/ftrain/status/541950651115524096 https://twitter.
Oh man then I read that donut poem as something VERY...
@thelancearthur Oh man then I read that donut poem as something VERY different than you intended.
the poem on page 211 hooooooly shit...
the poem on page 211 hooooooly shit https://twitter.
I know, feedback forever. I liked your Medium piece a lot...
@thelancearthur I know, feedback forever. I liked your Medium piece a lot because you are very funny.
I don't perceive time but instead live in the eternal...
@davidcho I don't perceive time but instead live in the eternal moment.
THIS. https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/594980586432897024
THIS. https://twitter.
i guess I COULD cut and paste but then the...um people with...
i guess I COULD cut and paste but then the... um people with good memories...
that's so much work though
that you can't retweet yourself really hurts this platform
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/276769935198404609
https://twitter.
Sometimes you eat the brand and sometimes the brand eats...
Sometimes you eat the brand and sometimes the brand eats you.
we gave this to the twins and suggested they color...
we gave this to the twins and suggested they color PROGRESSIVELY https://www. facebook.
I'm printing this out and sending it to your dad.
@digiphile I'm printing this out and sending it to your dad.
PAPER, ALEX, PAPER
What's the policy on including your own tweets in prose?...
What's the policy on including your own tweets in prose? Jonah Lehrer-level or no big deal?
or nothing at all
more than the Atlantic?
@leahfinnegan more than the Atlantic?
it may be my turn
my essay on breasts is coming out soon
there's one paragraph in there which hooooo doggies i mean...
who could hear anything over the sound of burning money
i almost don't want to show you this but...
@leahfinnegan i almost don't want to show you this but http://www. esquire.
Over, say, 50 years. Income equality? Worse. Reproductive...
@vruba @justinpickard @EmmaSlager Over, say, 50 years. Income equality?
A genuinely useful exercise here that would be amazing is...
@vruba @justinpickard @EmmaSlager A genuinely useful exercise here that would be amazing is to make a list of things that are worse/better.
I called my dad after I moved to NYC and said The world is...
@vruba @justinpickard @EmmaSlager I called my dad after I moved to NYC and said The world is a mess! he said, you're just reading the Times.
At times, following @maura on Spotify yields AMAZING...
At times, following @maura on Spotify yields AMAZING results: https://open. spotify.
gonna do a little writing, got a cup of coffee, and days of...
Wait, CAN you move back into Zeus's head?
@Choire Wait, CAN you move back into Zeus's head?
just hit me ford@ftrain.com DMs drive me crazy
@FurryPad just hit me ford @ftrain .
adam?
@FurryPad adam?
how many freaking pirate hats can they WEAR
Can I switch to just Sunday delivery tho.
@jeremyzilar Can I switch to just Sunday delivery tho.
i mean they are so tired of fatties
i mean, dude seemed in control of his shit
Hoooooooly shit this show is good...
Hoooooooly shit this show is good http://gimletmedia.
I think people are saying hey I won't make this worse but...
@gregorg I think people are saying hey I won't make this worse but cool that you see it.
ulgh I can't drink otherwise I'd be at flatiron lounge...
glad you are here joel
can I make them from tears
yes but our culture is homophobic and blowjob/rock bottom...
I can't eat anything until 2018
I came here to joke about about my lifelong compulsive...
I came here to joke about about my lifelong compulsive addiction to food and ended up being kind of homophobic so I guess I'm on Twitter.
tacos are delicious
I'm ready
hard. It was a dark time.
@karenmcgrane hard. It was a dark time.
Guys don't white knight me here I shouldn't have implied...
Guys don't white knight me here I shouldn't have implied that hitting taco bottom has anything to do with blowjobs and I'm sorry.
lol den's point is fair let's not pull him into this...
I call eating a chicken parm riding the red dragon.
I call eating a chicken parm riding the red dragon.
I mean that's more of an opportunistic hobo thing than...
I mean that's more of an opportunistic hobo thing than anything gay per se but I guess I should stop digging this grave.
I can totally see why Den feels that way but the thing is I...
I can totally see why Den feels that way but the thing is I am completely fine with everyone I America thinking I blew a dude for tacos.
And tacos are abundant and low value.
And tacos are abundant and low value.
Being addicted to food means everyone is like “watch those...
Being addicted to food means everyone is like “watch those carbs! ” and you don't want to tell them that in 2004 you sucked a dick for tacos.
let's jog to the bar
does anyone want to go someplace really dark and get like...
My doctor lives in my neighborhood, eight miles from...
My doctor lives in my neighborhood, eight miles from Manhattan, and we talked about transit and he said, “I ran here.
I went to the doctor. The bad news is I gained back all the...
I went to the doctor. The bad news is I gained back all the weight I lost.
students or faculty?
@john_overholt students or faculty?
Fairy tales help kids understand how complex the real world...
Fairy tales help kids understand how complex the real world can be. That's why this week we've been reading Jack and the Steel Beamstalk.
But wait, are THEY reading?
@john_overholt But wait, are THEY reading?
we could stop calling them dick pics and start calling it...
Pexting is sending pictures of your pet's genitals to your...
Pexting is sending pictures of your pet's genitals to your friends, which is no fun. But the one that bothers me is pooxting.
You're all getting frexts.
You're all getting frexts.
Just kidding—I would never attend guilt-management therapy...
Just kidding—I would never attend guilt-management therapy because that would take a spot away from someone who actually deserves happiness.
I'm fifteen minutes late for my guilt-management therapy. I...
I'm fifteen minutes late for my guilt-management therapy. I don't know how to feel about that.
three to five seconds
The problem of declining church attendance means less money...
The problem of declining church attendance means less money in the collection plate. That's why the future of faith is microprayments.
i prefer “area man”
as long as they use the right mimetype we can work it out
i'm a full person ted
My new band doesn't actually play any songs we just publish...
My new band doesn't actually play any songs we just publish track listings we're DubCore.
I know I live in the future because human behavior is...
I know I live in the future because human behavior is exactly the same.
Also I did this big [paid!] advertorial thing for GE which...
Also I did this big [paid! ] advertorial thing for GE which was about delivery networks with self-driving cars https://medium.
the future [1] http://motherboard.vice.com/read/one-day-i-wi...
the future [1] http://motherboard. vice.
nah it's too boring, it's just two Ses, no beaks
“The Apple Watch is a Watch.” by @jomc...
“The Apple Watch is a Watch. ” by @jomc https://medium.
section sign! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Section_sign
@jonmcramer section sign! http://en.
have you considered topic maps?
@karenmcgrane have you considered topic maps?
this is great
Right, I mean one day, maybe we'll get the programming...
@hunter_owens Right, I mean one day, maybe we'll get the programming environment that lets you just stay in the spreadsheet forever.
There are lots of people who like, graduated from...
There are lots of people who like, graduated from WordPerfect macros to web development.
That's true. I was always a nerd but didn't start actual...
That's true. I was always a nerd but didn't start actual programming until I was 22; figured I was just too dumb.
have you seen this beautiful creature...
@egabbert have you seen this beautiful creature https://archive.
this is great paragraphs are IN THE AIR
thank you but it's like hell for the people around me...
We would prefer if you stopped.
@RellyAB We would prefer if you stopped.
The name of the woman who tamed the crows and wrote the...
The name of the woman who tamed the crows and wrote the first paragraph was left out by the man who wrote the second paragraph.
All of western literature was originally designed to be fed...
All of western literature was originally designed to be fed to crows, who would carry the words to the gods. This was known as orthomancy.
I mean but when you're living the life it is actually handy...
@WhatTheBit I mean but when you're living the life it is actually handy to have the abbreviation.
In fact, the ¶ symbol is a crow's beak turned 90 degrees...
In fact, the ¶ symbol is a crow's beak turned 90 degrees counter-clockwise. Bet you didn't know that, but you're not a paragraph expert.
In fact, the ¶ symbol is a crow's beak turned 90...
In fact, the ¶ symbol is a crow's beak turned 90 counter-clockwise. Bet you didn't know that, but you're not a paragraph expert.
The word pilcrow (“¶”) exists because paragraphs were...
The word pilcrow (“¶”) exists because paragraphs were originally created to be fed to crows for magical purposes, thus must be kept brief.
People often wonder, when is the best time to stop one...
People often wonder, when is the best time to stop one paragraph and start another? The answer is 1:35PM EST.
I've been working on my paragraphs for 30 years and...
I've been working on my paragraphs for 30 years and consider myself something of a paragraph expert.
oh god you're totally right i've been overthinking this so...
that one was just for me
[Rhymes “blockchain” with “champagne.”] [Throws Ducati...
[Rhymes “blockchain” with “champagne. ”] [Throws Ducati laptop in ice bucket.
andrew pandoc is so good it translates markdown and html...
it's so good you hardly notice it. it's not just good it's...
@jackrusher it's so good you hardly notice it. it's not just good it's modest.
word nerd note: pandoc does a very serviceable job going...
“And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see...
“And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the tweet has gone there will be nothing.
“I must not tweet. Tweets are the mind-killer. Twitter is...
“I must not tweet. Tweets are the mind-killer.
this conversation is a runaway train
don't dude don't dddasdgjklndfgshkl placenta falls to the...
when a system is dominated by bald men that's pateriarchy
i'm listening to ben folds now you can't handle me
well i'm sure that brick by ben fol—oh shit why did you do...
oh hey iris was a really good song i'm going to bring that...
soaring harmony attenuation is a major problem in pop music...
hmmm these harmonies don't soar quite as much in 2015 as...
what is the loudest i can listen to this toad the wet...
“As for Hogan’s claim that he was attracted to her, that...
“As for Hogan’s claim that he was attracted to her, that seems to have been a figment of her imagination. ” — http://www.
No, I'm safe in Brooklyn.
@joshuatopolsky No, I'm safe in Brooklyn.
You'd be shocked if you knew how many Bay Area men suffer...
You'd be shocked if you knew how many Bay Area men suffer from early earnings release.
They tried but they can't include it until someone accounts...
@john_overholt They tried but they can't include it until someone accounts for the missing eleven days.
It catalogs pornography.
@richziade It catalogs pornography.
question...when...do checks come...so tired from...
@marklotto question... when...
rent-seeking is literally in his blood, and presumably is...
@jackrusher rent-seeking is literally in his blood, and presumably is raising a new generation!
Why choose? Throw in Bali, and it's $1,600/month....
@Choire Why choose? Throw in Bali, and it's $1,600/month.
god this world, and...taxi medallions
@kovnot god this world, and...
like, imagine the contracts involved in this event, an exec...
@kovnot like, imagine the contracts involved in this event, an exec assistant with a big binder of contracts. I'd pay $100 for a copy.
i wonder if the instagram shot was part of the deal and if...
@kovnot i wonder if the instagram shot was part of the deal and if so where is that contract.
i've been thinking about that all morning. my guess is that...
@kovnot i've been thinking about that all morning. my guess is that she was informed of the "CHOICE" theme and made it her own.
i'm hoping to god that our fine tabloid press is working on...
wait wait the part about the video with Costas is even...
Have you read this too? http://www.businessinsider.com/nicki...
@kovnot Have you read this too? http://www.
well it's clearly PR but VERY revealing PR
oh man that one is up for renewal
The Taxi industry is caught between this medallion mogul,...
The Taxi industry is caught between this medallion mogul, who threw the Nicki Minaj bar mitzvah, and Uber. http://en.
It is, I'm just completely obliterated with writing...
@kerrizor It is, I'm just completely obliterated with writing pressure. It needs basically one full day of rewrite and config, but...
So @kjhealy took me to CLUSTER SCHOOL with my VERY...
So @kjhealy took me to CLUSTER SCHOOL with my VERY IMPORTANT peen/vag data set @kjhealy /for-added-perfection-you-could-cluster-that-last-figure-b907c2d2e4b? source=tw-168dab556633-1430183468262" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.
exactly!
@mbostock exactly!
HOW many impressions? Fuck it, get me a type specimen book...
HOW many impressions? Fuck it, get me a type specimen book and a French 75, and don't open the door even if I scream.
OMG I DID I'M SO SORRY
This is the Unicode unicorn. I know you see an old horse...
This is the Unicode unicorn. I know you see an old horse with an empty box on its head—but trust me, it is glorious.
hah!
@vielmetti hah!
lol i did that right after retweeting myself
retweets are not endorsements
I went to disrupt the middleman, but when I had built my...
I went to disrupt the middleman, but when I had built my app and beheld my traffic, it turned out that all along the middleman was me.
Wellll...hand-checking it...basically because the ratio is...
@zeynep Wellll... hand-checking it...
we're all just finding our way together
yeah see this is one of those places where Bing is weird...
@JSEllenberg @tomscocca yeah see this is one of those places where Bing is weird http://www. bing.
“I would put my hands on your shoulders and say, ‘Every...
“I would put my hands on your shoulders and say, ‘Every sample size is meaningful. ” — https://medium.
They vary a lot, from spot-checking. I think this way is...
@debgalant They vary a lot, from spot-checking. I think this way is only good for sort of gut-check “I wonder” stuff on very common terms.
Oh there are ways to do it and you can get scholarly...
@debgalant Oh there are ways to do it and you can get scholarly access, etc. It's just not casual.
Oh duh many thanks.
@john_overholt Oh duh many thanks.
They're just playing games with us.
@Choire They're just playing games with us.
I should stick to soft subjects like LISP.
@andycairns I should stick to soft subjects like LISP.
No that would be mere tokenism SORRY SEARCH ENGINE PUN....
@andycairns No that would be mere tokenism SORRY SEARCH ENGINE PUN. Also frankly my pun was inaccurate, tokenization is why this works.
I tried but I don't know how to cluster in Excel and there...
@kjhealy I tried but I don't know how to cluster in Excel and there are limits.
Hi it's Monday let me break down the ratio of the word...
Hi it's Monday let me break down the ratio of the word penis to vagina in the media using suspicious Bing results https://medium.
I just published “The Words the Media Industry Prefers”...
I just published “The Words the Media Industry Prefers” https://medium. com/message/the-words-the-media-industry-prefers-5d33e5b021e0?
Why can't science breed a cat that can close the doors it...
Why can't science breed a cat that can close the doors it opens?
This is cool: http://www.bloomberg.com/graphics/2015-pace-of...
This is cool: http://www. bloomberg.
The Media Industry Prefers Penis (SFW!)
The Media Industry Prefers Penis A not-totally serious look at how The Verge, BuzzFeed, and the New York Times use words like “penis” and “vagina” (and “cat” and “dog”) 1. P v.
You can ask anyone to marry you, but it costs real money to...
You can ask anyone to marry you, but it costs real money to be Authentically Engaged.
This insane circumlocutory statement is how Facebook said...
This insane circumlocutory statement is how Facebook said “we ban fake accounts. ” http://www.
this article on facebook account scamming has tons of crazy...
this article on facebook account scamming has tons of crazy details [stacks of sim cards! ] http://www.
so is my editor :/
it's like 1,000 pages i keep promising myself i'll buy it
http://shop.oreilly.com/product/9780596102425.do
@mathowie @rustyk5 http://shop. oreilly.
also i sort of love being the dude who talks about...
sometimes the bug is not in the content management system...
everything is working fine the font in the URL bar has more...
♫West End to East Bayside♫
my actual emcee name is notorious chebeague
my emcee name is mackworth
if you had a rap battle in a kayak off of portland would it...
@rustyk5 if you had a rap battle in a kayak off of portland would it be all rap or halfway rock?
if digital journalists were lgbt competent the web would be...
in his heart
If you want to call yourself a brogrammer you need to show...
If you want to call yourself a brogrammer you need to show mastery of guynary arithmetic.
which is fine because Boys || Men still evaluates as true
I'm such a nerd that I just read Soul II Soul as a boolean...
I'm such a nerd that I just read Soul II Soul as a boolean operation.
Also the camera moves and you see a pigeon and we are...
Also the camera moves and you see a pigeon and we are supposed to believe Roy Batty died? Next you will tell me your owl is real.
then obviously the whole thing was staged
I mean who exactly sets those fires too? You're telling me...
@kleinmatic I mean who exactly sets those fires too? You're telling me they don't have fire suppressant as spaceships?
They want you to believe you are a replicant so that they...
They want you to believe you are a replicant so that they can control you.
The end of Blade Runner is cool until you remember that...
The end of Blade Runner is cool until you remember that c-beams don't glitter.
I asked you not to drink from my kir royale
dude I'm sorry
My mind says June but my body says October.
My mind says June but my body says October.
This brand won't build itself.
This brand won't build itself.
deadline is monday dude
i mean it's totally possible that the 47,510 vagina...
Seriously deleted articles aside there is no other news org...
Seriously deleted articles aside there is no other news org that can make something this amazing http://www. buzzfeed.
I love this article about Disney princes...
I love this article about Disney princes http://www. buzzfeed.
if you google BuzzFeed for penis it returns 56,100 results...
if you google BuzzFeed for penis it returns 56,100 results but only 8,590 for vagina, which is a 47,510 article difference.
what about embedding https://twitter.com/amanicdroid/status/...
what about embedding https://twitter.
Fav if you like to perform loyalty, RT if you like to...
Fav if you like to perform loyalty, RT if you like to perform affiliation.
the hedgehog is doing pretty well too tbh
(i.e. HTTP status 402)
@joeld (i. e.
no no i mean, micropayments, they come for us all
ET TU JOELD
all usenet needed was hashtags really
Did you ever see this? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=owyNA...
@laura_june Did you ever see this? https://www.
The two best Twitter accounts I've seen lately are this...
The two best Twitter accounts I've seen lately are this actor https://twitter. com/notneilcasey and this hedgehog https://twitter.
sometimes i just look at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gopher...
@michaelroston sometimes i just look at http://en. wikipedia.
In retrospect no one should have made a website.
In retrospect no one should have made a website.
Why are the web people here? We are here to take your...
Why are the web people here? We are here to take your amazing revenues and replace them with incredibly thin margins “at scale.
But also, God, why are the print people ANYWHERE?
But also, God, why are the print people ANYWHERE?
“Why are the web people here?” —@harrisj...
“Why are the web people here? ” — @harrisj @harrisj /leaving-the-new-york-times-bb3e73adc61f?
is awesome
congrats, this is an awesome and that post was good
whoa @18F is legit
you might adopt daniel
or a mom
omg i forgot that it was about GAMES journalism
A video about what really matters. http://youtu.be/1Vr6uVD3...
A video about what really matters. http://youtu.
Thanks!
@avidtechno @joshuatopolsky Thanks!
http://www.theonion.com/video/new-app-lets-you-work-for-your...
http://www. theonion.
I mean no wonder they thought blade runner was the future
briefcases filled with cheddar
sure which is funded by big cheese
cheese too, can you imagine the cheese board lobbying...
I hate when he gets little
i used to “battle-scar” my toys using our electric stove
one day we'll look back on that infographic from our...
took me until the morning, but nicely done
Speed
Yes! Ham Goes Up An Escalator http://www.clickhole.com/video...
Yes! Ham Goes Up An Escalator http://www.
on the bright side we'll always have something to tweet...
a friend of mine used to edit genre and said that they...
@leahfinnegan a friend of mine used to edit genre and said that they couldn't import romance novels from AUS because they were too rapey.
oh yeah that was bananas.
@leahfinnegan oh yeah that was bananas.
that last tweet was a quote from Martin Luther in 1545
it's weird to live in an era that truly, truly knows better...
@leahfinnegan it's weird to live in an era that truly, truly knows better but still does the dumb things.
“In 2015, did you feel that women had fewer opportunities...
@leahfinnegan “In 2015, did you feel that women had fewer opportunities than now? ” “I invented the nanocar that's driving us.
do you think they will still do that to women in 2050
i like when they interview brilliant women about what it...
to me that is like the kardashian shoot for paper
not under that identity
i don't need you i have kinja
how will you authenticate
You know who else gets church and state mixed up? America.
You know who else gets church and state mixed up? America.
i would personally benefit from any content management...
i would enjoy a button that reverses the paragraph order...
i mean all conclusions are nonsense but also you have to...
also indicating that this IS going somewhere which would be...
“we don't yet have the technology to make this interesting.”
@jamiekeiles @anne_boyer “we don't yet have the technology to make this interesting.
comforting color shifts that indicate boringness as a sort...
also maybe fables need animals because humans are so...
right also it just has to be so obvious to be true to form,...
I mean it's both and how do you manage that tension so that...
I made the right choice for America
otherwise you can't tell if this is building to an...
writing online you need to lead with the moral or maybe...
and like a headboard smashing into drywall
my NYC zip code has zero government-tracked sex noise...
data journalism, you're free http://editorial-ny.dnainfo.com...
data journalism, you're free http://editorial-ny. dnainfo.
whoa
The Bear Who Let It Alone is the most true four paragraphs...
The Bear Who Let It Alone is the most true four paragraphs anyone ever wrote about anything http://www. newsun.
when you make a self-referential joke you need to zoom way...
MaNy EMO kids use NICotine patches
sometimes i make a little stress noise like...
I'm still on slack tho
I'm really deep on this book draft and this big thing for...
@StarleeKine I'm really deep on this book draft and this big thing for Businessweek and I've got deadline tremors.
youtube animal tv casting is the best tv. along with steam...
@oolah youtube animal tv casting is the best tv. along with steam train tv.
“Tisdale has been called the ‘Land of Rape and Honey’ for...
“Tisdale has been called the ‘Land of Rape and Honey’ for nearly 60 years. ” http://www.
http://mlkshk.com/p/13UX6
http://mlkshk.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a-bCWfM0MCk
https://www. youtube.
look i know the real problem is splitsider
dude is right the police really did NOT need to kill radio...
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/590708483466604544/photo/1
https://twitter.
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/590708319880421376/photo/1
@Choire @redkeg https://twitter.
i just love the way in this movie that spike lee made...
apparently spike lee went back to public enemy on their...
i saw this with my dad in media, pa, and we both agreed...
When BuzzFeed and Gawker fight it's so easy to get...
When BuzzFeed and Gawker fight it's so easy to get distracted and forget the real enemy, The Awl Network.
You know a word you don't hear that much these days?...
You know a word you don't hear that much these days? “Mortdecai.
+1 off the cuff.
@Choire +1 off the cuff.
“Already this year, 10 lotteries have been held for 698...
“Already this year, 10 lotteries have been held for 698 units that received about 486,000 applications. ” http://www.
Adding to @jackrusher's praise of Olivetti Mode, a small...
Adding to @jackrusher 's praise of Olivetti Mode, a small thing for Emacs that you didn't know you needed. https://github.
why is everything about him so sad, he should basically be...
how many people were in the theater
who wants to take some prospect park fun run to the next...
who wants to take some prospect park fun run to the next goddam level http://en. wikipedia.
oh that just hurts
mondays are tough
“We've restarted the brain we discovered and it wants to...
“We've restarted the brain we discovered and it wants to talk about something called Squarespace.
cool tweets but you need more scenes
“Podcast guest” is a cool epitaph I guess except I won't...
“Podcast guest” is a cool epitaph I guess except I won't need an epitaph because my head will be frozen and launched on a colony ship.
Boy if you like the words literally and like then you are...
Boy if you like the words literally and like then you are going to love me as a podcast guest.
SIGMOO is a good idea and one can never do enough Unix...
@harrisj SIGMOO is a good idea and one can never do enough Unix signals stuff, right?
hahahaha yessss perl date libraries whoa
also all the various date/time stuff you need is basically...
that book is good tho
lolno but the Date() prototype is like scrambled brain eggs...
ulgh moment.js is the best avail but ulgh
@rustyk5 @harrisj ulgh moment.
You know what's good, though? Postgres date/time handling...
@harrisj @rustyk5 You know what's good, though? Postgres date/time handling back to like 4800BC.
let's not even talk about date/time handling on other...
@harrisj @rustyk5 let's not even talk about date/time handling on other platforms. nightmare.
jacob dear god we all know 1900 was not a leap year because...
http://imgur.com/gallery/o3vze
@PhilDarnowsky http://imgur.
Not with static type checking.
@harrisj Not with static type checking.
It was just trying to pack a lunch so it doesn't have to...
@patbits It was just trying to pack a lunch so it doesn't have to buy that stupid lunchbox then this bullshit happens.
This is a good point the TSA along with a do-not-fly list...
This is a good point the TSA along with a do-not-fly list probably keeps a “can fly but should not” for vultures. But what about penguins?
An enormous number of jokes are obsolete.
An enormous number of jokes are obsolete.
And that joke is so old, today he probably would do...
And that joke is so old, today he probably would do self-service check-in in that case and also vultures can't e-ticket? Plus no hands?
My fav joke is about the vulture with an antelope at the...
My fav joke is about the vulture with an antelope at the airport and they ask him if he wants to check that in and he says no it's carrion.
“‘I do television and film so I can take months off and...
“‘I do television and film so I can take months off and contribute to culture,’ Mr. Simpson said.
this poor smuggled baby orangutan in a backpack...
this poor smuggled baby orangutan in a backpack http://dotearth. blogs.
Slack has revived something that was VERY common in the...
Slack has revived something that was VERY common in the early days of the Internet, that sense of wearing a beeper.
yeah it's depressing that person can't spell “drivel”
I hate to be reductive but happy 1/5.
I hate to be reductive but happy 1/5.
Sometimes I'm at poetry readings and I think, “they should...
Sometimes I'm at poetry readings and I think, “they should have sent an astrophysicist,” I whisper it to myself without making eye contact.
Six billion tweets of poet outrage. And you know they'd...
Six billion tweets of poet outrage. And you know they'd pick some professor.
You know how in Contact Jodie Foster is like, “they should...
You know how in Contact Jodie Foster is like, “they should have sent a poet”? I keep thinking, which poet?
Good morning here I am speaking with @joshuatopolsky for an...
Good morning here I am speaking with @joshuatopolsky for an hour also I do some ads with him https://m. soundcloud.
i'm ready, i'm ready to give myself to the brands, I'm...
because i could not tweet for brands/they kindly tweet for...
maybe ten years to go until they remake the matrix
I guess these represent the “imperfect underbelly” of...
I guess these represent the “imperfect underbelly” of Indian weddings? But they are so fun and great &amp; I love them.
RIP Jonathan Crombie (Gilbert from Anne of Green Gables)...
RIP Jonathan Crombie (Gilbert from Anne of Green Gables) http://ottawacitizen.
so many brands in that photo
Shhh. Brands are watching.
Shhh. Brands are watching.
Usually this is where they scream religious songs at each...
Usually this is where they scream religious songs at each other.
It can't be this easy; I am terrified.
It can't be this easy; I am terrified.
I just held a nap race for the little twins. “Who can close...
I just held a nap race for the little twins. “Who can close their eyes harder?
We are all God's children. https://twitter.com/ftrain/status...
We are all God's children. https://twitter.
We were supposed to meet up at the ballpark but half the...
We were supposed to meet up at the ballpark but half the people went to the wheelhouse and the other half went to the bailiwick.
I have budget for shake shack
oh good then we can stay late and get this paid post for...
um leah what is the word in front of editor in your title
we will need you to write some of the ads
AND live events and conferences
native advertising
Congratulations to everyone at Gawker who is about to get...
Congratulations to everyone at Gawker who is about to get promoted to management.
appreciate it
good feedback
I wish there was a timeline driven CMS to support this...
At the zoo this monkey was throwing feces at a woman...
At the zoo this monkey was throwing feces at a woman wearing turquoise denim and I was like dude, c'mon, wet stool can't pelt teal jeans.
Maria vs singularity http://motherboard.vice.com/read/please...
Maria vs singularity http://motherboard. vice.
lol
fair
it's true it's how we win elections
or one of daddy's phones
people talk a lot about the patriarchy but no one ever hugs...
k1dp0wn3d
It was like, “Daddy what're you doing?“ “I'm doing Daddy...
It was like, “Daddy what're you doing? “ “I'm doing Daddy things, you need to go to bed.
My son just got out of bed to ask me what I was doing and I...
My son just got out of bed to ask me what I was doing and I had to explain that watching a hamster eat a tiny burrito is “a daddy thing.
desktop background https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/5884955...
@laura_june desktop background https://twitter.
Yeah I'll do sniglets idgaf.
Yeah I'll do sniglets idgaf.
Hatereads are a form of scornographic literature.
Hatereads are a form of scornographic literature.
Congratulations to Yahoo! on its acquisition of Fire Eagle!
Congratulations to Yahoo! on its acquisition of Fire Eagle!
it looks truly fun and you never have to worry about what...
you have an amazing brain jennifer except right now it is...
web pages
that looks much more fun than living inside a set of nested...
god god god i wish i had one of those brains that was like,...
the writing is going well about eighteen months later than...
http://pbump.net/files/post/hillary/maker.php?p=That_is_bull...
@patbits http://pbump. net/files/post/hillary/maker.
Pretty, pretty please. Don't you ever, ever feel. Like...
@leahfinnegan Pretty, pretty please. Don't you ever, ever feel.
i'd say shee is miss undaztood
The Role of Emoticons in the TriplePHazelton Recognition...
And I know eventually we'll be together/ one sweet and sour...
i just ordered it
ummm http://www.amazon.com/E-Mail-Addresses-Rich-Famous-Godi...
@droob ummm http://www. amazon.
thanx to @droob: chuck d and jennifer finch from l7 and a...
thanx to @droob : chuck d and jennifer finch from l7 and a fake madonna on AOL as covered by MTV in 1994 https://www. youtube.
agreed i'm never gonna get down on communities engaging...
Blackwater guards “faced mandatory minimum 30-year...
Blackwater guards “faced mandatory minimum 30-year sentences under a law passed during the crack cocaine epidemic. ” http://www.
bought a pi
"Well, I don't know his name," Reagan replied. "But let me...
@rustyk5 "Well, I don't know his name," Reagan replied. "But let me tell you, if I become President, he's going to get to know mine.
i forgot about train
yeah but randy newman is actually eleven inches tall so...
wait overtone yes oh god you probably di
Kind of an amazing album tbh.
@anildash @toomuchnick @leahfinnegan Kind of an amazing album tbh.
Wait Anil that is the entire theme of Randy Newman's Good...
that photo tho, it's just a brick wall
fair
You know what else no one told me about is Sonic Pi.
You know what else no one told me about is Sonic Pi.
http://open.spotify.com/track/0e0siwPeCy9UvQzN7zp6n8 why...
http://open. spotify.
Whoot! Congratulations!!!!
@goldman @crystal Whoot! Congratulations!!!!
exactly, you know, which.
@Linkletter exactly, you know, which.
PJ this is a macro, not unicode I EXPLAINED Unicode....
@PJVogt PJ this is a macro, not unicode I EXPLAINED Unicode. Haughey don't favorite this it encourages him.
that's fucked up
each muffin is made in shenzhen now it really is amazing...
it's in substrate in a little gel sac and when you heat it...
the butter is already inside the muffin and when you...
it's like seven muffins stacked and fired out of a gun they...
i'm imagining the meeting where they're like FUCK NOOKS and...
edmund r u going to steal my identity
See?
@thebitterstweet See?
Patrick your avatar.
@patbits Patrick your avatar.
they're moving away from nooks and just going balls out on...
I bet ending sentences with “which” could be a thing, which.
I bet ending sentences with “which” could be a thing, which.
not YOUR A/B tests, YOUR A/B tests are very, very important...
not YOUR A/B tests, YOUR A/B tests are very, very important to the overall success of your mission http://kadavy.
Oh, I am.
@harrisj Oh, I am.
For 20 years I've been running an experiment to see if...
For 20 years I've been running an experiment to see if self-loathing can move deadlines and I'm finally ready to publish my results: Nope.
“It is a chicken puppet, not a duck puppet.”...
“It is a chicken puppet, not a duck puppet. ” http://www.
Many Internet pundits were smashed under their treads. It...
@riordan Many Internet pundits were smashed under their treads. It was a brutal way to learn that only one thing mattered: The cycle.
just 82 short weeks
just 575 days to decide http://days.to/election-day-in-us/20...
just 575 days to decide http://days.
no it can't be http://www.daysuntil.com/Election-Day/index....
no it can't be http://www. daysuntil.
It was quiet in the global media village but then over the...
It was quiet in the global media village but then over the hill came a squadron of Take Tanks.
Say what you will about American politics, but there's a...
Say what you will about American politics, but there's a lot of wisdom in our two-family system.
Woah the reboot of Don't Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus is...
Woah the reboot of Don't Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus is dark as hell. https://twitter.
wow your minecraft game is NEXT LEVEL
♫ count the flashlights while the men play ♫
Sometimes the Spotify trail ends in Radio KAOS and that's...
Sometimes the Spotify trail ends in Radio KAOS and that's how you know it's time to go to bed.
STAY RIGHT THERE THE OREOS SOCIAL MEDIA TEAM IS INBOUND ON...
“Although his nation is nearly the size of Alaska, none of...
“Although his nation is nearly the size of Alaska, none of its 300 citizens actually live there. ” http://bigstory.
“He said his comments last year that gays should burn in...
“He said his comments last year that gays should burn in ovens had been overblown, but that he stood by them. ” http://www.
never forget https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/5865889680844...
never forget https://twitter.
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/586488557323362304/photo/1
https://twitter.
thank you, James!
@JamesGRobinson @svaixd thank you, James!
Do you like #content? Because man do I have some #content...
Do you like #content ? Because man do I have some #content for you.
the full stack life chose me https://twitter.com/ftrain/stat...
the full stack life chose me https://twitter.
a gas station?
@rustyk5 @Lubchansky @AGoldmund @PJVogt a gas station?
good charlotte tho :/
seriously an A+ neighbor
I know and she is just the best person.
@theodoreross I know and she is just the best person.
In Ditmas we call passive-aggressive behavior “slopin'.”
@theodoreross In Ditmas we call passive-aggressive behavior “slopin'.
I live in Ditmas, Ted. Your Park Slope bullshit doesn't...
@theodoreross I live in Ditmas, Ted. Your Park Slope bullshit doesn't work over the Caton line.
shit is about to get very serious for twin toddlers who...
or for people to consider and react to our work at length...
yes
What is the snack in your office that you are not eating...
What is the snack in your office that you are not eating right now? For me it is low salt potato chips.
or before release JASON COME ON
ulgh who will be the first person fired for this at the...
I wonder how long before women with Apple Watches are being...
I wonder how long before women with Apple Watches are being harassed by men sending them unsolicited dickbeats.
lotta dumb shit today
If the iPod was the Joshua Tree, and the iPhone was Achtung...
If the iPod was the Joshua Tree, and the iPhone was Achtung Baby, and the iPad was Zooropa, then the Apple Watch is obviously Mylo Xyloto.
I got a lot of automated wristwatch notifications/here's an...
“We would all have been better served had the Columbia...
“We would all have been better served had the Columbia report been three sentences long. ” http://www.
one of history's worst monsters definitely
I mean look, I had help, in the form of not having Rachel...
@toomuchnick I mean look, I had help, in the form of not having Rachel deny the potential of my jokes.
how many gallons of water does it take to grow the fuck up
I like how quickly this turned into Government Nomic...
@Mlsif @digiphile @goldman I like how quickly this turned into Government Nomic http://en. wikipedia.
To be fair, the password for the secret commenting system...
@Mlsif @digiphile @goldman To be fair, the password for the secret commenting system appears in a footnote on page 1,675.
“So we're decided on Platisher. Next on the docket,...
@digiphile @goldman “So we're decided on Platisher. Next on the docket, Crossfit.
Too late, Alex, I'm spending the day fantasizing about the...
@digiphile @goldman Too late, Alex, I'm spending the day fantasizing about the Congressional Neologism Approval Process.
Things haven't been the same since Congress gutted the...
@digiphile @goldman Things haven't been the same since Congress gutted the neologism budget.
they did such a good job. i want to go see it before it...
@jeremyzilar they did such a good job. i want to go see it before it gets taken down.
I mean that's not the worst government formulation for a...
@digiphile @goldman I mean that's not the worst government formulation for a thing? It could have been AmericanTurkCorps.
Whoaaa calm down I thought we were just crowdsourcing.
@digiphile @goldman Whoaaa calm down I thought we were just crowdsourcing.
and spelling assistAnce
feeling really good about that Whiskey Houston
yeah that looks delicious but damaging
If you mix Grey Goose and Old Overholt that's called a Rye...
If you mix Grey Goose and Old Overholt that's called a Rye and Gosling and it will make you throw up, much like this joke.
This might be a hint: https://twitter.com/mobli/status/58453...
@Choire This might be a hint: https://twitter.
no one else had photoshop
It was pretty collaborative. I just had a good computer.
@SteveBurnsAlive @snivelingmess It was pretty collaborative. I just had a good computer.
you've entered buttnet
no
http://butt.holdings/
@replyall http://butt.
yeah no one is even going to question that formulation...
I'm glad she is someone I gravitate back to once a year or...
@heavymeta I'm glad she is someone I gravitate back to once a year or so. Always something new.
Oh man I call the former the y-hole so that means that you...
@PJVogt Oh man I call the former the y-hole so that means that you just descended into... the p-hole.
I keep the high-culture stuff to a minimum here on Twitter...
I keep the high-culture stuff to a minimum here on Twitter in order to focus on more friendly subjects like javascript pony poop sex.
the other thing is this leng tan intepretation of four...
the other thing is this leng tan intepretation of four walls which helped me organize at least one decade of my life https://open. spotify.
sounds like your uncle knew what worked
willie nelson is pretty great tho
this is wonderful also oh god she lives in brooklyn if i...
oh no i love her so much i think she's just a consummate...
one thing i worry that people don't know about is margaret...
one thing i worry that people don't know about is margaret leng tan playing satie on toy piano https://open. spotify.
yeah i mean that's where i'm at and it's amazing
have you seen the mastodon video with the wizard shit and...
listening to it now sooooo goood
EXCELLENT
cut to eye surgery cut to calves head on lazy susan cut to...
oh yeah there's ZERO sense that this was a good boss
Dude this is an industrial video I don't have a face.
@paulkruczynski Dude this is an industrial video I don't have a face.
it's also insanely entertaining, like he just shouldn't...
did u read the jourgenson autobiography?
@imelven did u read the jourgenson autobiography?
Paul, what are your thoughts?
@paulkruczynski Paul, what are your thoughts?
no!
@imelven no!
I don't think Pigface gets enough credit.
I don't think Pigface gets enough credit.
my first ever concert was thrill kill kult in 1990 at the...
i mean this is the stuff walter isaacson NEVER covers
he puts a lot of vegetables in his butt and attacks the...
it's amazing
have u read the al jourgenson autobiography
April 3, 2015 - Dinner
Food Qty Calories Chocolate, Hershey's special dark, 5 miniatures 210 Jelly, 1 tbsp. 2 108 Soup, Chicken Rice, 1 c.
“‘Now I’m going to do that racist thing where I touch your...
“‘Now I’m going to do that racist thing where I touch your hair,’ he said as he reached for my afro. ” http://www.
soooooo good i'm a sucker for walking around movies
April 3, 2015 - Lunch
Food Qty Calories Bread, Whole Wheat, 1 slice 2 180 Butter, 1 tbsp. 102 Pho, 3/2 c.
this chart should help https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/584...
this chart should help https://twitter.
April 3, 2015 - Breakfast
The important part is the community, is reaching out, and asking for help. Food Qty Calories Banana, 1 large 110 Peanut butter, 1 tbsp.
oh yeah this is sweeeet
no will look it up
if I took the job you would find that I had been there all...
so that would be in the vending machine too
this is true my wife took a wooden toy away from our...
i've chewed it :/
it's a slippery slope
a more modern trail mix would basically be one M&M in a...
i think also in days of yore you could be like i'm eating...
@ameliamango @theunread @cpalmatier i think also in days of yore you could be like i'm eating these healthy salty nuts and raisins!
it's sooooo good
actually i've chewed belts a rigid shiny cheap leather is...
shredded in about three to five minutes with the plug...
can't you feel how satisfying it would be to grind it with...
okay i'll be honest i sort of knew about the first three...
michael i chomp pencils in half routinely in the first...
no no i love the way they form a mass under your tongue as...
i mean at least just for research
oh hell yes
oh god the debates over like which ruby framework to use...
right or something that released cinnamon at time intervals...
be real here dude
oh i'll ask
something where the chocolate slowly flakes off after five...
i am the entrepreneur in residence of your heart
no one needs granola bars at work people need chew toys,...
like you KNOW the perfect vending combo is not trail...
THEN you use your VC network to put your stupid vending...
like, get some vending machines, buy randomly off...
like, get some vending machines, buy randomly off http://www. candywarehouse.
like the state of the art (this is 2012) seems like there's...
like the state of the art (this is 2012) seems like there's all sorts of optimization and scaling issues to resolve http://www. jiem.
you ever think what if i just dropped out and just thought...
when it's ready
“with the kind of well-defined bone structure that makes...
“with the kind of well-defined bone structure that makes you think about bone structure” https://stories. californiasunday.
why are you drinking in a chinese grocery
jealous but you know what i'm glad i gave you guys an...
can you imagine a museum of these collections the raw power...
Oh it's going to live
orrrrrr one day we will watch the world's most...
right? I mean god help you if you mispronounce this in...
@nelson right? I mean god help you if you mispronounce this in front of the wrong person.
you mean Gamergate?
@samfbiddle you mean Gamergate?
Sam do you have it?
@samfbiddle Sam do you have it?
More-gehl-unz or Morga-lonz?
More-gehl-unz or Morga-lonz?
Slack automated emails are pretty good sometimes....
Slack automated emails are pretty good sometimes. https://twitter.
what do you guys think of tweeting in rhymed couplets
or something about pee
when you said you liked this conversation I knew what I had...
there once was a woman named leah/who only liked honey in...
is this a limerick
who doesn't like honey tho
“Germanwings and Airline Safety: Where the Danger (Does...
“Germanwings and Airline Safety: Where the Danger (Does Not) Lurk” by @zeynep https://medium. com/message/germanwings-and-airline-safety-where-the-danger-does-not-lurk-59a4d79d5ef8?
I don't see anything about how toy cast-iron pans should be...
I don't see anything about how toy cast-iron pans should be seasoned so I doubt the sincerity of these kid kitchens. http://www.
tweeting is a key part of my illness mitigation strategy
i'm like easing up to the two hours this aft where i teach...
where are you on furious 7?
@leahfinnegan @bn2b @hamiltonnolan where are you on furious 7?
excuse me leah but the fact that PB&H on a wrap is big...
Gawker should assign a followup story @leahfinnegan
i mean a lot gets stretched in there but truth is, it is...
All those boy socks are somewhere now.
@leahfinnegan All those boy socks are somewhere now.
I bet people who have serious life illnesses love hearing...
I bet people who have serious life illnesses love hearing about dad sinuses on Twitter.
Here is the definitive source on PB&J on a wrap...
Here is the definitive source on PB&amp;J on a wrap http://gawker.
I just had peanut butter and jelly on a wrap.
I just had peanut butter and jelly on a wrap.
I don't remember I was hanging in the closet because they'd...
@sjttocs I don't remember I was hanging in the closet because they'd stitched my bottom and top halves together.
In my fever dream last night a plane crashed into my...
In my fever dream last night a plane crashed into my self-driving car, slicing me in two, and the rest was surgeons making jokes.
mo got pho
its strep says Dr so tired
The Long DayQuil's Journey Into NyQuil.
The Long DayQuil's Journey Into NyQuil.
“Maybe this just-announced product or service is intended...
“Maybe this just-announced product or service is intended for someone who has different needs than me.
so real tho
they count against me
where you put off writing a first draft for six or eight...
@karen_e where you put off writing a first draft for six or eight months?
right now my cold is at the level of i don't want to work...
i want my cold to get worse
i have to write so many things today
I have a cold
thanks
yeah i mean they're just going to be everywhere and it...
i know but like this makes SO MUCH sense I can't even argue...
I had every chance to make things better.
I had every chance to make things better.
I tweeted out a selection of my own stuff with a typo in it.
I tweeted out a selection of my own stuff with a typo in it.
blurgh thank you
Who will triage my email? WHOOOOOooooooo —@ftrain...
Who will triage my email? WHOOOOOooooooo — @ftrain #0742 --share-0-238" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.
http://mlkshk.com/p/13HXN
http://mlkshk.
go oooonnnnnnn
definitely used to be MUCH longer, at least from direct...
I mean our forebears did fine and lived decent lives...
@BradyDale I mean our forebears did fine and lived decent lives without several gigs of email.
I totally understand that but also as someone who spent...
@BradyDale I totally understand that but also as someone who spent tons of time to get all that stuff in one place, I want to erase it all.
Thanks! Fixed!
@BradyDale Thanks! Fixed!
“So now I had my a laboratory for exploring my own past. I...
“So now I had my a laboratory for exploring my own past. I began to…” — @ftrain #3542 --share-0-205" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.
Just to be clear this is a real photo of me using skype to...
Just to be clear this is a real photo of me using skype to do the podcast in this tweet https://twitter.
You know how I write things and they sort of knit the...
You know how I write things and they sort of knit the technological and emotional worlds together? NOT THIS ONE.
oh shit
Me: “Every nursing home is actually a media organization!”...
Me: “Every nursing home is actually a media organization! ” Attendant: “Sure thing Mr.
“Poor Mr. Ford keeps talking about some Internet? Made by...
“Poor Mr. Ford keeps talking about some Internet?
“If we approach the talent show as a system and work with...
“If we approach the talent show as a system and work with dining services maybe we can have canned peaches while the kids sing carols.
I worry that I'll be drawing box-and-arrow charts in the...
I worry that I'll be drawing box-and-arrow charts in the old folks home. “Just let Dad graffle, it's what he knows best.
People just can't tolerate how little their opinion matters.
@maureenflaherty People just can't tolerate how little their opinion matters.
My Quantified Email Self Experiment: A failure
The sun/moon calendar 2006–2017, by Lê Trọng Lục on Wikipedia My Quantified Email Self Experiment: A failure I have an archive of my own email going back 18 years, containing 450,000 messages. One day I decided to make it searchable.
this is why i'm here. this is my whole function. to not...
@leahfinnegan this is why i'm here. this is my whole function.
literally 22 years of my life now in this conversation with...
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/582654886749331456/photo/1
@leahfinnegan https://twitter.
Oh duh that was a link to producthunt the actual beep boop...
Oh duh that was a link to producthunt the actual beep boop thing is https://www. beatport.
yeah but that was like three total gchats
whoa. thanks for ripping that out of yourself with a rusty...
@Lencicki whoa. thanks for ripping that out of yourself with a rusty can opener.
My friends made this app that plays beep boop music and I...
My friends made this app that plays beep boop music and I love it http://www. producthunt.
“Call your girl friends. Go out together and get yourself...
“Call your girl friends. Go out together and get yourself pampered.
Michael don't make it sad.
@sippey @Choire Michael don't make it sad.
i support your choice to use portrait mode although not...
“Across the hall works the man Berns praises ‘as the guy...
“Across the hall works the man Berns praises ‘as the guy who finally solved the mystery of scrod. ’” http://www.
“The baffled doctor asked what she meant by ‘ticklebox.’”...
“The baffled doctor asked what she meant by ‘ticklebox. ’” http://www.
11 years ago yes http://www.ftrain.com/MeatsYesMeats.html
@momjeans73 11 years ago yes http://www. ftrain.
Tonight: Ease into Monday watching Katie and Sam do PPT for...
Tonight: Ease into Monday watching Katie and Sam do PPT for a bunch of Germans who stumbled in from the High Line https://www. facebook.
So @katienotopoulos is a human toilet so it'll be cool to...
So @katienotopoulos is a human toilet so it'll be cool to watch her present PowerPoint slideshows SPONCON REDBULL https://www. facebook.
You need a verified person to retweet, that usually makes...
@AGoldmund You need a verified person to retweet, that usually makes things beep. Try @PJVogt ?
I mean, it already is, but more so.
I mean, it already is, but more so.
My autobiography title will be “What did I just step in: A...
Mo just told the twins that Kriss Kross's “Jump” is an...
Mo just told the twins that Kriss Kross's “Jump” is an “Easter bunny song.
lol
they really like a song about monkeys jumping on the bed now
yes but we pulled it off the playlist
a lot of them are liberals who love the truth too
Take Wobegon
he loves npr and wants to keep it pure
its everything at once
it is a living document of our times
it's also convinced that it is being censored in real time
did you read it? It's against NPR, feminism, Nitasha, Pao,...
@leahfinnegan did you read it? It's against NPR, feminism, Nitasha, Pao, social justice, liberals, and Reddit gold, and is just starting.
This Reddit thread regarding the Ellen PAO verdict is the...
This Reddit thread regarding the Ellen PAO verdict is the ultimate Internet shitshow. http://www.
Man some people I'm married to really don't want to hear...
Man some people I'm married to really don't want to hear any more Marina and the Diamonds songs on repeat.
cc @goldman
NO WAY, this is the good stuff, this is why I read all...
@maureenflaherty @goldman NO WAY, this is the good stuff, this is why I read all those penmanship manuals from the 1880s.
wut noooo that piece was really good and I learned from it
Oh god I'm reading this now, “The project would be a...
I can totally see you as a Fagin sending orphans out to...
sure we can make something work for way under $3k/mo
Maybe you can stow away in the Gowanus arcology ductwork...
@leahfinnegan @Choire Maybe you can stow away in the Gowanus arcology ductwork with the other members of the Smith St. Blood Scavengers?
detroit? how are you with six-hour freegan potlucks where...
@leahfinnegan @Choire detroit? how are you with six-hour freegan potlucks where people talk brickwork?
only portland remains in maine
you could get a good sandwich for $3.50
@Choire you could get a good sandwich for $3.
i remember this place before they built all the sun towers...
okay so trot out your arcologies piece i guess?
@Choire okay so trot out your arcologies piece i guess?
WHAT
leah you're a brilliant writer known for your eyewear and...
tgif rite
|■_■¬)) Joan Didion for Céline
my god
enhance
The memes are finding their natural home now, heavy in our...
The memes are finding their natural home now, heavy in our bowels. https://twitter.
We're all like, “Yes, those cats ARE OKCupid,” and Ira...
We're all like, “Yes, those cats ARE OKCupid,” and Ira Hayes turns his head in the Iwo Jima picture and looks perplexed and saddened.
Pretty often using software I can feel everyone who lived...
Pretty often using software I can feel everyone who lived through the 30s and 40s shaking their heads.
can't stop won't stop
YES
My wife put up more Easter door rabbits. I call this...
My wife put up more Easter door rabbits. I call this iteration of the wreath Mad Max Beyond Thumperdome.
it was a different time
umm guys did you somehow miss november 1985...
@ReadMatter umm guys did you somehow miss november 1985 https://twitter.
Like so many people I have been seduced by Java Server...
@goldman @hoverbird Like so many people I have been seduced by Java Server Faces Dancers.
i don't want to scare them
OH MY GOD THE ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS SECTION
I have heard rumblings of concern from the Whitespacing...
that shit is so real
I just showed my @svaixd class some of the 5,000 pages of...
I just showed my @svaixd class some of the 5,000 pages of ECMA-376 4th edition Part 1, “Office Open XML” http://www. ecma-international.
fear is the mimetype killer
i mean my name is paul
Fortress America is a really good Kinja...
Fortress America is a really good Kinja http://fortressamerica. gawker.
after a long winter of dicks I discovered in myself an...
@rustyk5 after a long winter of dicks I discovered in myself an invincible summer, but also of dicks.
let's do this http://mlkshk.com/p/13EXU
let's do this http://mlkshk.
I feel that way every day of my life
sometimes she shakes her head at me she gets dizzy
but I can't exactly read when mo drives
no I can't my license expired
reading is hard when you drive tho
you know what's more fun are dickens's notes because he...
listening to this radio program might put things in...
@leahfinnegan listening to this radio program might put things in perspective https://archive.
im real sorry. Hope it works out for you.
@leahfinnegan im real sorry. Hope it works out for you.
you've closed this tab before yes?
@leahfinnegan you've closed this tab before yes?
nice try aunt kapie
panic on the streets of ask.fm
@Choire panic on the streets of ask.
Also we got Electronic which softened the blow.
Also we got Electronic which softened the blow.
DAD STOP
truly, it is not
the world is so big and has so many eels in it
no dude it was a whole THING, there were pages dedicated to...
http://mlkshk.com/p/13EF9
@lizzieohreally @AGoldmund @PJVogt @replyall http://mlkshk.
in a couple years you can probably get it out of your head...
bwahahahah
yeah just i shouldn't have brought that up
not even the eel girl meme?
@PJVogt @AGoldmund @replyall not even the eel girl meme?
Do you accept payment in attention?
@MacherM @Choire @Awl Do you accept payment in attention?
“New York City media” can be abbreviated to just “media”...
“New York City media” can be abbreviated to just “media” with no loss of meaning.
“I mean, Twitter was basically ruined as soon as New York...
“I mean, Twitter was basically ruined as soon as New York City media discovered it in 2010 or so, anyway. ” http://www.
http://mlkshk.com/p/13DOS
http://mlkshk.
Good to see @goldman making something of himself.
Good to see @goldman making something of himself.
[Also let me know if I can answer any questions. Glad to...
@Bill_Braine @MasterCardNews [Also let me know if I can answer any questions. Glad to explain story.
agreed! Also--what a house.
@monkchips @sogrady agreed! Also--what a house.
dan this tweet is not IAB standard
i'm thinking something more general interest rather than...
i mean but i do think in the last ten years everyone has...
@hondanhon @sixfoot6 @rustyk5 i mean but i do think in the last ten years everyone has gotten smarter, maybe?
i have a fantasy of a publication that is just one medium...
i own http://mediumrectangle.com and i keep wanting to...
@sixfoot6 @hondanhon @rustyk5 i own http://mediumrectangle.
like it can be so reactive, so like, BF-style identity...
i mean i think it'll be a kind of "what works for our...
is facebook even the web at this point or is this just like...
like the existence of this product implies FB will be...
@nxthompson @rustyk5 like the existence of this product implies FB will be better able to circulate your content if you feed it metadata.
i mean, that is a side effect of publishers using their...
@nxthompson @rustyk5 i mean, that is a side effect of publishers using their platform, right? question of degree.
dan it hurts stop
like it seems like people are diversifying to pinterest
i mean i think the smarter folks know they need to...
@rustyk5 i mean i think the smarter folks know they need to diversify? the risk is if social as a category implodes.
the sad thing is that the shortest path to better media is...
well i mean the risk is taking any kind of facebook growth...
@rustyk5 well i mean the risk is taking any kind of facebook growth as a continuing revenue stream, right? like people did with google ads.
huh i have no idea
eh the online ad networks are such a nightmare that the...
You know what was a nice Twitter era? When everyone had...
You know what was a nice Twitter era? When everyone had Minecraft avatars.
sure and the publisher will be named zuckleberger
valuable feedback!
@AdamLZucker valuable feedback!
I mean at that scale if you can keep 20% of people from...
@rustyk5 I mean at that scale if you can keep 20% of people from going away for 10 mins you're talking how many 100s of millions of dollars?
Sure, don't break the flow, up engagement time, sell new...
@rustyk5 Sure, don't break the flow, up engagement time, sell new dynamic ad products with nominal revenue split, lower risk.
It's much cheaper than acquiring companies.
@rustyk5 It's much cheaper than acquiring companies.
The Computerland professor describes his students as “a...
The Computerland professor describes his students as “a generation gifted with total vision at birth” which is a realllly good burn.
wow i never knew about the newsousorur dot blogspot dot...
@leahfinnegan wow i never knew about the newsousorur dot blogspot dot com?
Here is a page https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/58019405372...
Here is a page https://twitter.
I found a book, TRAVELS IN COMPUTERLAND, by an English Prof...
niiiiice
Every time Facebook or Apple or Google or Amazon does...
Every time Facebook or Apple or Google or Amazon does anything weird I like to smile really big and say, “and this is just the beginning!
JUST THE BEGINNING
“Like Facebook, media companies also want improved user...
“Like Facebook, media companies also want improved user experiences. ” http://www.
Thank you for letting me work this evening.
@maureenflaherty Thank you for letting me work this evening.
that's nice, thank you
i know what i am lois
so not at forever 21 then
basically if it happened anywhere but pro publica it would...
that would be so cool
like what if it was at forever 21
it kind of depends where it happened
lois
http://www.pewresearch.org/quiz/how-millennial-are-you/
@speckledwords http://www. pewresearch.
Shitcoin, FINALLY http://www.washingtonpost.com/news/speakin...
Shitcoin, FINALLY http://www. washingtonpost.
I took this test and it said I was 96% millennial and that...
I took this test and it said I was 96% millennial and that made me cry so now I'm 100% millennial JESUS JUST KIDDING https://twitter.
well i'm red-faced
Also just go because what if they throw you out of Olive...
@jbasher @fmanjoo @katienotopoulos @cwarzel @MattZeitlin Also just go because what if they throw you out of Olive Garden?
Joe you're not invited to lots of stuff.
@jbasher @fmanjoo @katienotopoulos @cwarzel @MattZeitlin Joe you're not invited to lots of stuff.
oh fuck https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/580110670865268736...
@rustyk5 oh fuck https://twitter.
probably not really startups, now that i think about. more...
@phildini probably not really startups, now that i think about. more big global companies with giant ad budgets.
yea--but with the caveat that they are actually working...
I'm going back through Twitter and I realize I've said some...
I'm going back through Twitter and I realize I've said some mean things about brands.
Well brand newsrooms are where agencies/brands set up shop...
@phildini Well brand newsrooms are where agencies/brands set up shop to interact and react with social media. So that specific thing.
Fun fact! I wrote a functional signage usage guide for...
@Bill_Braine @MasterCardNews Fun fact! I wrote a functional signage usage guide for MasterCard back in ye olden days.
Hello!
@Bill_Braine @MasterCardNews Hello!
this is not helpful
I want to embed in a brand newsroom, participate if...
I want to embed in a brand newsroom, participate if possible, and write about it. Is your brand #brave enough to let me in?
the procrastination checks i wrote all weekend just got...
dude nooooo way the way my brain works i'd need to start by...
a shriekback is three ounces of gin with a slice of...
truly
you always forget how good it is
lionel drunkie is so good
Bartender I will have a Midnight Runner and give my friend...
Bartender I will have a Midnight Runner and give my friend a Public Enemy, and give the ladies at that table a Cameo and a Soft Cell.
A Simply Red is cranberry vodka with a lonely man's tears...
A Simply Red is cranberry vodka with a lonely man's tears for a mixer.
chris the police are just the backing band for dream of the...
Why aren't more cocktails named for 80s pop acts? I'd drink...
Why aren't more cocktails named for 80s pop acts? I'd drink a Phil Collins, a Simply Red, a Sting, a Speedwagon, and, obviously, Champaign.
serious long low exhale
say it clear
you know what's up
James Carville said Pennsylvania is two cities,...
@theodoreross James Carville said Pennsylvania is two cities, Philadelphia and Pittsburgh, with Alabama in between.
I don't know if you can know me unless you've been in a van...
I keep channeling the pun-making interfaith ministers of my...
I keep channeling the pun-making interfaith ministers of my youth and thinking things like, “What we REALLY need is #gracetogether , right?
Okay different reason.
@AGoldmund @laura_june Okay different reason.
Is it red like the walls of the USS Constitution, to hide...
@AGoldmund @laura_june Is it red like the walls of the USS Constitution, to hide the blood of sailors?
I think @AGoldmund has the nicest wall color scheme.
@replyall @laura_june I think @AGoldmund has the nicest wall color scheme.
“Did I tell you my crazy dream last night?” “Yes, I think...
“Did I tell you my crazy dream last night? ” “Yes, I think so.
kapie you are like the people asking thrush to prove he...
I know kapie I've been keeping track
I.e. https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/579771432235708416/ph...
I. e.
My wife hung up some toy bunnies with ribbon as an Easter...
My wife hung up some toy bunnies with ribbon as an Easter decoration for our front door, but it looks like a warning to all bad rabbits.
sleeeeeeeeep nowwwwwwwww sleeeeeeeeeeep...
it's by @jessamyn https://medium.com/message/deathhacks-b767...
@v21 @glitchtits @FeyNudibranch @mcclure111 it's by @jessamyn https://medium.
No, sadly! What was it?
@izzaboo No, sadly! What was it?
Growing up near Philadelphia I can tell you that, at the...
Growing up near Philadelphia I can tell you that, at the truly best hoagie shops, people working the slicer are missing fingers.
Welcome to Ditmas, glad you are visiting from Bangladesh,...
Welcome to Ditmas, glad you are visiting from Bangladesh, we will now randomly shoot your baby in the leg. http://7online.
The song is extremely uplifting. The lyrics are as positive...
@iano @goldman @fmanjoo The song is extremely uplifting. The lyrics are as positive and affirmative as anything I've heard in rock.
jason how deep does this go
jason are you oneshotting tweets
I'm pretty sure that I have now spent more time watching TV...
I'm pretty sure that I have now spent more time watching TV shows about World War II than America spent fighting World War II.
/me writes in notebook, nods
wait do you rhyme with vanilla or kia
I literally have no idea what everyone is obsessing over.
@PJVogt I literally have no idea what everyone is obsessing over.
I KNOW
I need to learn a lot of stuff before I run my big mouth.
@mjanssen @currentpubmedia I need to learn a lot of stuff before I run my big mouth.
Radio: All the work of TV, with all the glamour of print.
Radio: All the work of TV, with all the glamour of print.
I am learning a little about story-driven radio production...
I am learning a little about story-driven radio production and after many years of working in magazines I can assure you that it is insane.
http://www.metafilter.com/129883/The-camera-never-falls-over...
@pareene @leahfinnegan @tomscocca #5082439 " target="_blank" rel="noopener">http://www. metafilter.
ew
thanks for the opportunity for me to learn to be even more...
It's also one of the places where you can stand and be...
@RachelFersh @leahfinnegan It's also one of the places where you can stand and be nervous before readings.
No, I recognized the spot but did not understand the true...
@RachelFersh @leahfinnegan No, I recognized the spot but did not understand the true significance.
you pass it on the way to housing works to appear on panels?
@leahfinnegan you pass it on the way to housing works to appear on panels?
near housing works alley thing?
@leahfinnegan near housing works alley thing?
He or she seems fine, though, well-socialized,...
@jeremyzilar @richziade He or she seems fine, though, well-socialized, super-friendly. And it was a very, very long leash.
and so fucking boring
This dinosaur is still in our house, and he's doing okay,...
This dinosaur is still in our house, and he's doing okay, but he's clearly yearning for home. http://ditmasparkcorner.
I imagine her closing her eyes and taking a long breath...
@leahfinnegan @joshualamorey I imagine her closing her eyes and taking a long breath several times a day.
if i hadn't squandered every professional opportunity i'd...
leah you could pull off a good essay on the book of ruth
depends on the church
or DARWIN with a big sad trombone sound
haha yes, but i mean but also I kind of felt for him, he...
RIGHT?
@joshualamorey RIGHT?
oh right like http://otrrlibrary.org/OTRRLib/Library%20Files...
@FurbleScout oh right like http://otrrlibrary. org/OTRRLib/Library%20Files/T%20Series/This%20I%20Believe/ and http://otrrlibrary.
sigh.
@FurbleScout sigh.
huh. i would be totally down with lay preacher sermons...
@FurbleScout huh. i would be totally down with lay preacher sermons where people talk about what they believe or don't every week.
that one is just more amateur to me
yeah i mean imagine how shitty your life is if that's the...
a pastor wrote me once when i was pro-sex worker in an...
I just gave so many pastors their sermon title
If I were to make a new book based on the biblical book of...
If I were to make a new book based on the biblical book of Ruth I would call it GLEAN IN.
Boo hoo I have boils booooo hooooooooo
She's like the anti-Job, no whining, family-first, heads...
@ftrain She's like the anti-Job, no whining, family-first, heads from Moab to Bethlehem and just gets down to gleaning.
Like it's just a cool little story about Ruth hanging in...
@ftrain Like it's just a cool little story about Ruth hanging in there.
I've spent days of my life searching for pubdate. Blows my...
@jeremyzilar I've spent days of my life searching for pubdate. Blows my mind.
This is one of the places where I think a fixed-position...
@jeremyzilar This is one of the places where I think a fixed-position element with author/date metadata can be great.
Not a lot of people know this about me but I'm pretty sure...
Not a lot of people know this about me but I'm pretty sure my favorite book of the Bible is Ruth.
One time in Tel Aviv this woman told me about Indigo...
One time in Tel Aviv this woman told me about Indigo Children, for like two hours, and having a third eye.
Hello!
Hello I am teaching my class. My wife found this.
Chelsea Clinton writes in the New York Times about her...
@sjttocs Chelsea Clinton writes in the New York Times about her abortion.
I'm not saying this to raise important questions about race...
I'm not saying this to raise important questions about race but because I think that's all it would take and it would be hilarious.
Seriously if you want to see America tear itself apart in...
Seriously if you want to see America tear itself apart in about 90 minutes just give everyone but white people one free cup of coffee.
i can only drink pepto bismol
Like, if you want a conversation, that would get you a...
Like, if you want a conversation, that would get you a conversation and a half.
What if Starbucks gave black people free coffee and wrote...
What if Starbucks gave black people free coffee and wrote #StartReparations on the side?
“I like stickers as much as the next kid who grew up in...
“I like stickers as much as the next kid who grew up in America in the 1980s. ” https://medium.
Hi, Leah. Nice to hear from you. Have you gathered all your...
@leahfinnegan Hi, Leah. Nice to hear from you.
I respect him, though.
@katienotopoulos @PJVogt @broderick I respect him, though.
i haven't seen ryan and don't know if he's pretty.
@katienotopoulos @PJVogt @broderick i haven't seen ryan and don't know if he's pretty.
Grumpy would just be crowded, basically.
@theodoreross Grumpy would just be crowded, basically.
wow ryan is very funny and talented
I want a lady in the Blue Bottle and a freak in the Peet's.
I want a lady in the Blue Bottle and a freak in the Peet's.
“Also, don’t buy him a parrot!”...
“Also, don’t buy him a parrot! ” http://www.
it puts the lovies in the basket
no but seriously https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/577818793...
no but seriously https://twitter.
“(For a bunch of dudes with more money than Croesus,...
“(For a bunch of dudes with more money than Croesus, venture capitalists sure are tetchy! )” http://fusion.
Data, Learnings, $$$ = three of my all-time favorite things
Sitcom idea: After years together, a polyamorous triad...
Sitcom idea: After years together, a polyamorous triad discovers that their handfasting ceremony was performed by an unlicensed witch.
important photo http://mlkshk.com/p/139KF
important photo http://mlkshk.
god shouldn't you all be editing instead of dicking around...
well tbh i just put that in as a joke
i think it holds together well to page 22 and then it's...
@Tyrangiel @marklotto @Choire i think it holds together well to page 22 and then it's intermittent through page 41.
Also my programming, product, and editorial teams.
@marklotto @Tyrangiel Also my programming, product, and editorial teams.
times not teams
Oh no, I was talking about MY email response teams. See you...
@marklotto @Tyrangiel Oh no, I was talking about MY email response teams. See you in July.
Let's talk email response times, Mark.
@marklotto @Tyrangiel Let's talk email response times, Mark.
It's not really DONE tho
not mac, tho!
@toxic @merveille not mac, tho!
I convert org-mode to MSWord via pandoc to submit to...
@toxic I convert org-mode to MSWord via pandoc to submit to editors, so this is a great blessing.
They just ported it over to Mac OS but didn't leave a lot...
@toxic They just ported it over to Mac OS but didn't leave a lot of clues.
Thanks to @toxic today I know that you can zoom in and out...
Thanks to @toxic today I know that you can zoom in and out of Word documents if you hold down control + spin the mouse scroll wheel.
OH MY GOD OH MY GOD
seriously though wordperfect 5.2
@jrobertlennon seriously though wordperfect 5.
in 2015 there are no keyboard shortcuts to zoom in and out...
in 2015 there are no keyboard shortcuts to zoom in and out of a page in microsoft word https://support. office.
in my imagination the infighting that arose with the people...
@admoman in my imagination the infighting that arose with the people who wanted .
Boston Terriers? Or some fucking cats? With Choire Sicha,...
@leahfinnegan @Choire Boston Terriers? Or some fucking cats?
when do we get to be the horrible commentators
why did you link this why are you this me to do can't
so many emoji of happiness occur to me right now
A conversation between Jeffrey Goldberg, Leon Wieseltier,...
thank you
little factorial joke for you
Four programmers, 24 opinions.
Four programmers, 24 opinions.
let's start an intentional-virtual commune where certain...
let's start an intentional-virtual commune where certain software is permanently banned http://www. nytimes.
it's kind of fun, all the crunchy creative stuff that has...
MORE CREATIVE GROWTH GAMES by Eugene Raudsepp
Sure! I'm optimistic about serving rich people who want to...
@theodoreross Sure! I'm optimistic about serving rich people who want to make new things, pessimistic about rich people who want more power.
Even if I were the least cynical person in publishing then...
@theodoreross Even if I were the least cynical person in publishing then I'd still be the most cynical person in open web technologies.
People say I'm kind of cynical but deep inside I'm sitting...
People say I'm kind of cynical but deep inside I'm sitting at a campfire listening to the person who holds the talking stick describe yurts.
Please don't stop with the code questions I just wanted to...
Please don't stop with the code questions I just wanted to share that passage with you because it was some real pinecone experience shit.
my friend passed away months ago. they gave away books at...
my friend passed away months ago. they gave away books at his memorial.
we're lucky the BW invoicing system allows for that level...
10 business days!
@torrez 10 business days!
These are great questions please keep asking questions.
These are great questions please keep asking questions.
Omg these are great questions
Can't wait until the part of the process where we talk...
@Tyrangiel Can't wait until the part of the process where we talk contracts and fees!
I'm writing the kicker and adding TKs.
@Tyrangiel I'm writing the kicker and adding TKs.
(It was due like a month ago and I'm like, “Oh, I need to...
(It was due like a month ago and I'm like, “Oh, I need to tell people about CONFERENCES,” and then thousands of words go by.
You can email to ford@ftrain.com if you are ashamed.
You can email to ford @ftrain . com if you are ashamed.
I'm writing a huge thing on CODE. It's hard. Civilians:...
I'm writing a huge thing on CODE. It's hard.
Also Linux was bad but twitter pretty much did us in tbh,
A friend of mine in 1998 said, “The only function of Linux...
@torrez A friend of mine in 1998 said, “The only function of Linux is the administration of Linux. ” I need to ask him about Docker.
imagine the forking
i keep waiting for someone to propose this and call it...
@raganwald i keep waiting for someone to propose this and call it shitcoin.
guys the zombie outbreak won't be because eco-terrorists...
i know but we're in the middle of a history glut which kind...
the thing is to write software to monitor your typing and...
the thing is to write software to monitor your typing and then each week 3d-print a better keyboard welcome to http://lifekey.
imagine the discussions over which license to use
i'm concerned that if programmers can 3d print their own...
you had twins! it's just that one is a human baby and the...
@AGoldmund @dreww you had twins!
making a website is like making a baby; starts out fun,...
Inspiring and honest! I added it to my #spirituality tweet...
@AGoldmund Inspiring and honest! I added it to my #spirituality tweet collection at http://despairtweets.
my guy is riding a red schwinn his name is friedrich
sure payday loans is a cool business
maybe she can loan you some money?
@leahfinnegan maybe she can loan you some money?
I agree, she is doing great work.
@leahfinnegan I agree, she is doing great work.
noooooooooooooo i'm a brand-new intern all improvements are...
just some joke no nothing wouldn't be funny
i was just laughing at a joke i remembered
NOTHING.
@leahfinnegan NOTHING.
lot of friday left to go robinson maybe you could pace it a...
leah
the team hasn't always held together the way i'd hoped but...
just really wanted to take a moment and thank you for your...
man DO they especially after a long day of mowing lawns
it's wise to set expectations
he called them his Führerkids
not trying to start controversy just observing the dad sitch
Hitler wasn't a dad. Will Smith is a dad. So...
Hitler wasn't a dad. Will Smith is a dad.
If being a dad wasn't cool why would so many people include...
If being a dad wasn't cool why would so many people include it in their Twitter bios?
Oh it's easy. When two learnings fuck they make a...
@Choire Oh it's easy. When two learnings fuck they make a deliverable.
Also I want to point to this and go this is the ENDGAME are...
@mccarthyryanj Also I want to point to this and go this is the ENDGAME are you sure that's what you WANT?
i mean it actually IS fruitful for everyone to understand...
i like this guy tho because he reverse engineered it...
oh god they are vcs
they are constantly eating my food and watch me all the...
@ibogost they are constantly eating my food and watch me all the time, and they occasionally just poop on the floor.
i treat my cats like a startup.
@ibogost i treat my cats like a startup.
sounds like SOMEONE could use more followers and traffic
/me bursts into restroom stall, pulls wet wipe from filthy...
/me bursts into restroom stall, pulls wet wipe from filthy toilet, puts it in trash can. “You're welcome, Gaia.
traffic is a crazy thing https://medium.com/everything-about...
traffic is a crazy thing https://medium.
“‘It’s the symbol of a stick man dropping something in the...
“‘It’s the symbol of a stick man dropping something in the toilet, with a slash bar across the stick man. ’” http://www.
Perfect Spotify profile https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/57...
Perfect Spotify profile https://twitter.
i mean, they make the choices that are right for them!
@gregorg i mean, they make the choices that are right for them!
I can understand that everyone has a job to do, but can you...
@durex @Medium I can understand that everyone has a job to do, but can you understand how my genitals are a raw, balm-smeared stump?
She was allergic to her own saliva...would she be allergic...
@shani_o She was allergic to her own saliva... would she be allergic to love?
tbh i'll be thinking about this all day
She went All Around the World...to find Real Love.
@shani_o She went All Around the World... to find Real Love.
THIS IS REAL THIS IS THE REAL WORLD
talking about swatting!
@jfruh talking about swatting!
“Officer, here is an article in USA Today that might...
“Officer, here is an article in USA Today that might interest you while you arrest me at gunpoint? ” OH GOD OUR WORLD.
“If the cops have no clue what you’re talking about, there...
“If the cops have no clue what you’re talking about, there are articles about swatting in publications. ” http://digg.
this contains my favorite dystopian grim meathook present...
this contains my favorite dystopian grim meathook present infographic of all time http://digg. com/2015/how-not-to-get-swatted https://twitter.
i'm so good at internet man i'm like an internet champion
hindsight is terrible
oh my http://www.beatriceco.com/bti/porticus/bell/pdf/videop...
@goldman oh my http://www. beatriceco.
this is likely one of those things that bell labs solved...
@goldman this is likely one of those things that bell labs solved completely in 1978 and then... well, stuff happened.
also audio conferencing
sure they're going to use grunt.js to run some long-running...
@jakesutton @rustyk5 sure they're going to use grunt. js to run some long-running tasks on node or io.
I'm not an expert, I can't write about imposter syndrome.
I'm not an expert, I can't write about imposter syndrome.
Sure!
@JeremySzal @StarShipSofa Sure!
Fighting ISIS: “a biker with lip piercings, implanted fangs...
Fighting ISIS: “a biker with lip piercings, implanted fangs &amp; ‘necromancer’ written across his black leather jacket. ” http://www.
Revisiting an Old Piece
Revisiting an Old Piece Plus a Postscript Sometimes I like to revisit statistics and links. I like to do this months after something is in the world.
This story proves that New York City never was, and never...
This story proves that New York City never was, and never will be, a ferretocracy. http://www.
he has a ted talk https://www.ted.com/talks/lennart_green_do...
@ftrain he has a ted talk #t -5227" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://www. ted.
OH WOW
right that makes sense or otherwise he truly is a magician
AROUHGRW:HJLRWHJKL:WHJKL:WGR
Is he throwing them off the table?
@ftrain Is he throwing them off the table?
WHERE ARE THE CARDS GOING
This is a video of my writing process....
This is a video of my writing process. https://twitter.
“Did you MEAN to show me something that didn't amuse or...
“Did you MEAN to show me something that didn't amuse or entertain me immediately without any thought on my part?
“It's been three seconds and nothing yet?” —500 helpful...
“It's been three seconds and nothing yet?
Eh it takes a minute to animate and I don't want to spend...
sewious eats
NOT AT MY MUSEUM
i did it for the ttr
nightmare
okay we are done for a long time with liveblogging apple...
okay we are done for a long time with liveblogging apple events thank you to @anildash and to http://alrotches. com/ https://medium.
Yes.
@replyall Yes.
It never ever ends https://medium.com/message/apple-watch-li...
It never ever ends https://medium. com/message/apple-watch-liveblog-87efbbf8509f https://twitter.
they killed it
Huge new opportunities in health care for iPhone...
Huge new opportunities in health care for iPhone https://medium. com/message/apple-watch-liveblog-87efbbf8509f https://twitter.
Let's see if we can top this image at...
Let's see if we can top this image at https://medium. com/message/apple-watch-liveblog-87efbbf8509f https://twitter.
So @anildash and I will be live-blogging the Apple event...
So @anildash and I will be live-blogging the Apple event today we're both incredibly excited to see striped shirts https://medium.
oh man that's tough about choire
verdammt erbärmlich
If eighteen months of fighting about cardinality...
@john_overholt If eighteen months of fighting about cardinality restrictions via email lists makes for a good comic book, then yes.
There's nothing Amish about this. I just asked the robots...
There's nothing Amish about this. I just asked the robots to leave me alone so that I have enough time to tweet.
People are reading https://medium.com/fords-sensorium/notifi...
People are reading https://medium. com/fords-sensorium/notifications-8ced3d423535 and thinking I've gone luddite when all I did was tell robots to leave me alone.
try the veal, it's delicious!
@xeni @stannenb @anildash try the veal, it's delicious!
safety is a construct that the corporatist state promotes...
Pretentious Liberal Arts is increasingly a dead language.
@anildash @xeni Pretentious Liberal Arts is increasingly a dead language.
The tensions between a brand-centric corporate...
@anildash @xeni The tensions between a brand-centric corporate weltanschauung and America's grim aspirational classism: Never not funny!
Apple WATCH Liveblog
t Apple WATCH Liveblog Anil Dash and Paul Ford return (see previous efforts ) to liveblog Apple’s latest special event , with Al Rotches creating images on the fly. If Apple can keep rehashing the same old shit, so can we (we even rehashed this intro).
“That Way We’re All Writing Now” by @pomeranian99...
“That Way We’re All Writing Now” by @pomeranian99 https://medium. com/message/that-way-we-re-all-talking-now-49e255037f15?
Or Wordpress RIP.
Or Wordpress RIP.
You used to have to hold a whole big seance to communicate...
You used to have to hold a whole big seance to communicate with the dead but now you can just use Medium.
Aaaaactually I use Wordpress R.I.P.
@osulop Aaaaactually I use Wordpress R. I.
Is there an Apple release this week? I missed the whole...
Is there an Apple release this week? I missed the whole thing because I don't wear a watch.
★╔╗тнε Ъεรт ❤️ ★╬╔╗║║╔╗╗╦╔ ★╝╚╝╚╚╚╝╚╩╝ 🇷🇪🇹🇼🇪🇪🇹
http://giphy.com/gifs/m12GiqBQywgbS?tc=1
@frank_chimero @robinsloan http://giphy. com/gifs/m12GiqBQywgbS?
wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee https://medium.com/fords-sensorium/not...
wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee https://medium.
I mean just let me know
now they are fighting over the library book
it was spit into my hand :(
the last tweet had a typo because someone was playing...
The kids selected a childrentozss' guide to plastic...
The kids selected a childrentozss' guide to plastic manufacturing as their first ever library book.
Notifications & Alerts
Notifications & Alerts I realized that my digital life was getting too complex, so I turned off chat. Then I removed myself from a bunch of Slacks.
Dude left the web better than he found it like 10,000 times...
Dude left the web better than he found it like 10,000 times over.
Hooray for @mathowie who after 16 years leaves @metafilter...
Hooray for @mathowie who after 16 years leaves @metafilter in great hands to do healthy new things. http://metatalk.
My friends built this and it's amazing if you like a...
My friends built this and it's amazing if you like a continuous free way to listen to millions of EDM tracks https://www. beatport.
Busy social settings
“…busy social settings…“ I am going to cut and paste my portion from an email discussion about overcoming party shyness and call that my daily post. But let’s see if I can keep posting every day.
My wife just walked in to this room and said “Hey, OneShot...
@iano @DanielZarick @goldman My wife just walked in to this room and said “Hey, OneShot is cool! The color picker!
Also this platform is INSANELY hot shit/if you program...
Also this platform is INSANELY hot shit/if you program Python &amp; like EDM you should apply just to get into the beta https://sfx. recruiterbox.
If I wasn't a complete garbage Python programmer I would...
If I wasn't a complete garbage Python programmer I would apply for this job working for my friend @richziade https://sfx. recruiterbox.
It's a lovely product that has been carefully thought...
@DanielZarick @goldman It's a lovely product that has been carefully thought through. I know Jason is proud and you should be too.
but I love the color picker!
@DanielZarick @goldman but I love the color picker!
oh yeah. The end of day I'd the worst.
@DanielZarick @goldman oh yeah. The end of day I'd the worst.
WhiskerNet
WhiskerNet I’m quoted in an article : “I was 22 and the Internet was new and everyone was sitting around a table chatting and laughing,” Ford told me. “Who went to parties where no one knew each other?
The first thing I do when I wake up and get the children dressed—which, my God. Getting the…
The first thing I do when I wake up and get the children dressed—which, my God. Getting the children dressed.
lololol
Some passive-aggressive Wikipedia editor for the Star Wars...
Some passive-aggressive Wikipedia editor for the Star Wars Ep 1 page put “Plot” in quotes. https://twitter.
Glad to have Pareene call me on my shit....
Glad to have Pareene call me on my shit. http://pareene.
Sausage streams!
Medium really wants us to use these little empty spaces to capture thoughts. It’s positively eager for us to jam some thoughts in its thought-capturing machine so that it can grind them into thotstreams.
Yes to the Dress?
Yes to the Dress? Right now people in my professional world (content platform pontificators) are avidly discussing the traffic garnered by a single picture of a blue-and-black dress that could also—depending on how your neurons are firing—look white-and-gold.
We Put A Falcon And A Rabbit In The Same Room Together....
We Put A Falcon And A Rabbit In The Same Room Together. What Happened Will Not Surprise You.
When The Goal Of An Email Is To Stir A Sense Of Dread
Virginia Heffernan and Paul Ford have never met but they have crossed paths, and they've been sending fake work emails to see who most horrifies the other.
I have completed an email prank war with @page88...
I have completed an email prank war with @page88 https://medium.
Just Checking In
Just Checking In By Virginia Heffernan and Paul Ford Virginia Heffernan and Paul Ford have never met, but have often crossed paths—we live in New York City; were editors at Harper’s Magazine ; write about technology; and write for The Message on Medium. For no particular reason we’ve started sending emails to see who can make the other person experience the most profound sense of dread and panic.
After software eats the world, software will digest the...
After software eats the world, software will digest the world. Then software will poop out the world.
When an interface design looks like shit it suffers from...
When an interface design looks like shit it suffers from poo-omorphism.
https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/569305678906576896/photo/1
@mccv @goldman https://twitter.
I wonder if after the stock exchange closes for the weekend...
I wonder if after the stock exchange closes for the weekend in winter they keep it warm, or if that would just be heating a dead bourse.
b103 is sort of magic for me it's like constant and runs...
When I read something I hate, I search for it on Twitter...
When I read something I hate, I search for it on Twitter and see how many people are praising it to remind myself that praise means nothing.
could god ever spit a freestyle so sick that no one could...
If Jobs was here he'd be scrolling in his grave.
@laura_june If Jobs was here he'd be scrolling in his grave.
you can hit on interns now without career risk because...
leah you are now a war correspondent in the war on rats.
@leahfinnegan @bobbyfinger leah you are now a war correspondent in the war on rats.
omg i love it
Imagine if everyone fighting on the Internet just put aside...
Imagine if everyone fighting on the Internet just put aside their differences for a moment and yiffed.
“After a silence of twenty-five seconds, during which Apple...
“After a silence of twenty-five seconds, during which Apple made fifty thousand dollars in profit... ” http://www.
god that makes sense.
@starsandrobots @waxpancake god that makes sense.
Ahhhhh it was a smear!
@waxpancake Ahhhhh it was a smear!
Brian May, too. Hmmm. Laurie Anderson and Bjork. Oh wait:...
@waxpancake Brian May, too. Hmmm.
ANDY do a Message piece about the great nerds of rock
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7fM5QRliYII
@waxpancake https://www. youtube.
Talk with your children about Boston.
Talk with your children about Boston.
Reblogged by http://HighScalability.com is a highlight of...
Reblogged by http://HighScalability. com is a highlight of any web nerd career http://highscalability.
Although it probably ends with vinyl nerds making a movie...
It's interesting how similar this is in a way to ecology,...
@jackrusher It's interesting how similar this is in a way to ecology, observing the changes in small parts of an ecosystem.
good p.s.!
@raganwald good p. s.!
♫Bloooooooocking you/is easy 'cause you're horrible.♫
♫Bloooooooocking you/is easy 'cause you're horrible.
Corollary to Greenspun's Tenth and Zawinski's Law is that...
Corollary to Greenspun's Tenth and Zawinski's Law is that every Unix command-line utility expands until it is Turing-complete.
User interface hall of fame: "grep...
are you sure this isn't the product requirements document...
@goldman are you sure this isn't the product requirements document for Google+?
I always recommend my own posts because what if no one else...
@bec @jeffrey I always recommend my own posts because what if no one else likes them.
oh they'll complain
(I'm getting slammed too its just not all in one place)
or make a cup from @ftrain's skull from which to drink his...
I'd just blow it all on lottery tickets.
@daweiner I'd just blow it all on lottery tickets.
abe has a tuchus and ivy has a booty butt
Everyone in publishing needs to realize that the real money...
Everyone in publishing needs to realize that the real money comes not from traffic, not from engagement, but from understanding reacharound.
that's basically the plot except that the "this" is a...
well, quads
yeah it really is, like it's completely insane, there's no...
LinkedIn just went viral.
LinkedIn just went viral.
Always a panelist, never a moderator.
Always a panelist, never a moderator.
once i sent someone who pirated a PDF an angry email and...
sam
yeah i mean just do what we do and obsessively structure...
Jesus Christ where are these young journalists who can...
Jesus Christ where are these young journalists who can listen.
also i mean 6:30 is normal
ooooof yeah i mean toofs it's for real
can she go down earlier when does she go down
"it's really an issue of pacing"
when this happens and mo comes home I like to talk about...
i have to get josh a big article first
http://open.spotify.com/track/28BdAdlH9m7NuqW4mc765I
@laura_june http://open. spotify.
abe went down with the light on
out cold i may be the greatest artist in history
look zelda knows that resources are tight and that choices...
i just did the best-orchestrated bedtime of my life, we did...
i got home from work and had fifteen minutes where the...
you'll be back
every single sentence
glad you could see this exact reaction
I mean weirdly here yes it really should be one value
if that's true then yes you are living your best life
i would love to use that but i cant make it work in batch...
if you work at a place that publishes tons of grainy pee...
that fucking phone i think about it every week and the...
@jackrusher that fucking phone i think about it every week and the http://trashbat. co.
but it is also air cover
i think people believe different things and thus its not...
I mean we live in a world of misplaced priorities
i mean yes those are priority! but we can spare some cycles...
@atduskgreg i mean yes those are priority!
Hi I published pieces about Apple product decisions and...
fair enough. stuart russell convinced me that attention to...
@atduskgreg fair enough. stuart russell convinced me that attention to the values problem is not wasted energy.
dude I'm on a train with a cold on twitter
that was a bot
lol
yours is a defensible position that is not entirely at odds...
@atduskgreg yours is a defensible position that is not entirely at odds with bostrom's research agenda!
oh matter of taste. I think the new flat design is WAY...
@TheProdigalFool @WhatTheBit oh matter of taste. I think the new flat design is WAY rougher on the eyes.
That's true and I'll note it in the piece. But when it all...
@TheProdigalFool @WhatTheBit That's true and I'll note it in the piece. But when it all went flat design they left that green MEAN.
Mike, look at twitter. Are 90% of the people here blind?
@mik3cap Mike, look at twitter. Are 90% of the people here blind?
i'm so sad now
i mean so will i
do u need money i have my fee from that medium piece
Yes and I can see why they are horrified, especially when...
@digiphile Yes and I can see why they are horrified, especially when people are willing to pay other people to promote for them.
I will invest in u
Choire
Yes, as long as you reach around and promote them too.
@johnshankman Yes, as long as you reach around and promote them too.
I know some people who proudly promote themselves five or...
I know some people who proudly promote themselves five or six times a day, and they seem healthy and their skin looks great.
I don't think people should be ashamed of promoting...
I don't think people should be ashamed of promoting themselves. Promoting yourself is normal and we've all been doing it since puberty.
I'm nearly done promoting myself for the day.
I'm nearly done promoting myself for the day.
Michael it's like a whole THING now, freaking out about AI....
@mgrnbrg Michael it's like a whole THING now, freaking out about AI. Partly ridiculous, but yep, the values problem is worth thinking thru.
Oh I'm familiar with her work.
@ellenchisa @kissane Oh I'm familiar with her work.
I mean (1) people are shitty at programming computers; and...
I mean (1) people are shitty at programming computers; and (2) intelligence is a physical phenomenon; so you combine those things and hmmmm.
I really appreciated your article in Transactions and gave...
It was so useful, tho! Because the brand/program management...
@ellenchisa @qrush It was so useful, tho! Because the brand/program management stuff is like NOT KNOWN on the East Coast.
So I was like, what are you AI guys worried about? And then...
So I was like, what are you AI guys worried about? And then I poked around, and I was like, oh, sure!
i mean http://darktwitter.com is still available so as far...
@tante @edd @TtW_conf i mean http://darktwitter.
Anyway this is a sort of "nerds are worried about AI again,...
Anyway this is a sort of "nerds are worried about AI again, but why" piece http://www. technologyreview.
And I will move on to promoting this OTHER piece I wrote,...
And I will move on to promoting this OTHER piece I wrote, about SUPERINTELLIGENT AI http://www. technologyreview.
For purposes of humility I will now stop promoting this...
For purposes of humility I will now stop promoting this great piece I wrote about CLASS CONSCIOUSNESS BUBBLES https://medium.
“What if I told you that…Medium and Genius are basically...
“What if I told you that…Medium and Genius are basically the same website? ” https://medium.
“People hate green bubbles.” —@ftrain...
“People hate green bubbles. ” — @ftrain https://medium.
Thanks to @edd for tipping me off to the green bubbles...
Thanks to @edd for tipping me off to the green bubbles https://medium.
I just published “It’s Kind of Cheesy Being Green”...
I just published “It’s Kind of Cheesy Being Green” https://medium. com/message/its-kind-of-cheesy-being-green-2c72cc9e5eda?
OMG
When people say “You have a lot of time on your hands!” a...
When people say “You have a lot of time on your hands! ” a good reply is, “Wait, I'm confused, would that have taken you a long time?
I like things disappearing
im kind of relieved tbh
I was kind of drunk and talked a lot of shit about cats
at some pt they will prob post the video
thanks I appreciate it
agreed
still screaming (well my daughter)
wow Toph I called you Abe because my son was screaming...
have fun in there abe
It’s Kind of Cheesy Being Green
It’s Kind of Cheesy Being Green Apple is petty sometimes A few months ago my friend Edd Dumbill shared a discovery. He pointed out that if you search Twitter for the words “ green bubbles ” you’ll find very consistent results.
Many of the problems in Star Trek: The Next Generation came...
Many of the problems in Star Trek: The Next Generation came about because Data had mutable state.
wait a minute what kind of big complicated software did...
semantically sensible, long-lived urls are one of the few...
http://www.ftrain.com/help_ftrain.html...
@rustyk5 http://www. ftrain.
man
how did we watch this show
i made that fonzi joke on https://twitter.com years ago...
i made that fonzi joke on https://twitter.
i'm vc fonzi i only invest in series ehhhhhhhhhhhhhh
it stands for very cool
i'm a vc
(Would you say that it is a useful breakdown of the state?)
(Would you say that it is a useful breakdown of the state?
this is a useful breakdown on the state of machine...
this is a useful breakdown on the state of machine intelligence companies @shivon /the-current-state-of-machine-intelligence-f76c20db2fe1" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.
Someone parked a truck in my mouth.
Someone parked a truck in my mouth.
you're too busy?
@page88 you're too busy?
exactly. And nurses coming off shift.
@redkeg exactly. And nurses coming off shift.
I'm getting tandoori chicken and rice and listening to...
I'm getting tandoori chicken and rice and listening to Marina and the Diamonds. Fuck everything love is the binding force in the universe.
I'm on an express bus. It will stop across the street from...
I'm on an express bus. It will stop across the street from a restaurant that prides itself on being Indian and Pakistani.
http://Bustime.mta.info is the greatest gift to the mildly...
http://Bustime. mta.
Cool freaks wikipedia club is amazing and represents...
Cool freaks wikipedia club is amazing and represents everything great about the internet.
how do you have the energy to even tweet right now
the men's bathroom at medium tells you exactly how many...
Crew but same diff.
@michaelroston Crew but same diff.
Web fact: The men's bathroom at Tumblr is stocked with...
Web fact: The men's bathroom at Tumblr is stocked with pomade.
i look like your best teen friend's sad dad
Anyone who says tonight “you don't look like I expected,” I...
Anyone who says tonight “you don't look like I expected,” I will slap the Warby Parkers off your skinny face.
fuck you adrian
Hell is other people's weather.
Hell is other people's weather.
February 9, 2015 - Lunch
Food Qty Calories Cheddar, 1 c. 0.
February 9, 2015 - Breakfast
Food Qty Calories Cereal breakfast, typical (2 c. cereal, 1 c.
most of the time we just stared at the gowanus expressway...
actually there are some genuinely funny patrick stories
i have fun stories about how the neighborhood used to be i...
that was a trick question it was never cool
i lived there in the 90s when it was cool and edgy
You know how people are like, I wish we could create a new...
You know how people are like, I wish we could create a new Internet? We'll do that when the Bell House turns into a iced-in cannibal frenzy.
Also bring a cot and a sleeping bag.
Also bring a cot and a sleeping bag.
I'm talking at http://irlclub.info/ tomorrow and the...
I'm talking at http://irlclub. info/ tomorrow and the forecast calls for an ICE PELLET STORM so if you come I will give you a dollar.
we used to play "person or stuff" and it was horrible
it's coming together
here's a little preview https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/56...
@AdrianChen here's a little preview https://twitter.
i call this coolness paralysis. it's really awkward.
i call this coolness paralysis. it's really awkward.
after you give a reading it's weird. you're hanging around...
after you give a reading it's weird.
i'm putting together my irlclub presentation right now....
i'm putting together my irlclub presentation right now. adrian asked me to talk about ye old timey internet cuz i'm old.
fuck that shit http://wgno.com/2014/06/12/regular-lady-gets-...
@leahfinnegan fuck that shit http://wgno.
i'm not coming to your house again robert
leah is this u https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/56381827156...
@leahfinnegan @KenSilverstein1 @wmckdc leah is this u https://twitter.
good thing the united states has settled on a nine-digit...
writing about internet technology is like dancing about...
“Safeguarding your personal, financial and medical...
“Safeguarding your personal, financial and medical information is one of our top priorities” is never a good opener to an email.
Coke should just buy Radio Shack and then we could give...
Coke should just buy Radio Shack and then we could give ourselves over to the hashtags in our hearts.
I know, right? Great seeing you.
@etl I know, right? Great seeing you.
jesus
with a diet coke and a parliament light the pieces just...
so delicious
the publishing morning speedball
I miss parliament lights
its so great
gawker is a brand they are just hurting themselves
Hi guys the first ten minutes of this are my Medium piece...
@replyall Hi guys the first ten minutes of this are my Medium piece re reported but without any acknowledgement.
E.B. White was a fantastic tech blogger...
E. B.
in retrospect WALF at the steinheim was the coolest goddam...
i wonder if they still have vinyl or it's just like one old...
it's SUPER catchy
my kids love this song. They are three. 13 years younger...
@KenSilverstein1 @mitchsunderland @natashavc my kids love this song. They are three.
Eh, ruining his life will probably not help him to become a...
@rustyk5 @katelaurielee Eh, ruining his life will probably not help him to become a more empathetic person in his community.
yeah and it's pointless to find him, like the specificity...
@rustyk5 @katelaurielee yeah and it's pointless to find him, like the specificity is against the grain of the story. internet.
Yeah, I forget how trapped writers feel. One of the reasons...
@jnchapel Yeah, I forget how trapped writers feel. One of the reasons I keep programming is so that I don't have that feeling.
i'm worried that dude is findable and that it will result...
If you understood the laws of karma you'd understand why...
If you understood the laws of karma you'd understand why you must hire me as a science writer, little girls @jolenecreighton /heres-what-its-like-for-a-woman-to-send-a-job-rejection-to-a-man-17af3090c501" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.
At first I was like this seems like a lot of hay to make...
At first I was like this seems like a lot of hay to make and then the final email from the dude is SPECTACULAR @jolenecreighton /heres-what-its-like-for-a-woman-to-send-a-job-rejection-to-a-man-17af3090c501" target="_blank" rel="noopener">https://medium.
org-mode has latex pdf output so you can make a book
Getting your articles translated is the best thing in the...
Getting your articles translated is the best thing in the world. You feel important but you have no way of knowing how much people hate you.
jassssfgohisfga;hjklafgsf;gs
we're gonna get thru today charlene
i'm dieting and what i want right now is a toamuffin which...
you have the snowden files ken you already know my address
if you had been pure of heart the seahawks would have won...
excellent work!
@voidstin @cmnycz excellent work!
cool movie about grace hopper in historical context...
cool movie about grace hopper in historical context http://fivethirtyeight.
I do this! But sometimes you're all up in tmux on a server...
@jackrusher I do this! But sometimes you're all up in tmux on a server or whathaveyou.
You can make a delicious risotto using nettle broth.
@KenSilverstein1 You can make a delicious risotto using nettle broth.
Useful nerd Postgresql trick I never knew: "\e" in psql...
Useful nerd Postgresql trick I never knew: "\e" in psql brings up your $EDITOR with your query loaded; save and quit to run the query.
now that football is over i'm like maybe some nethack
but i'm never *on* the phone
right but on *twitter* not at fisherman's wharf
because this never happened of course
bot
wait Charlie r u a not now 2
MY reichsfuhrer is heinrich hermler
a better dad would have taught him to love the patriots
I mean ken if you were a good person and pure of heart...
tom brady is really really wealthy and happy and still...
nothing you can do can change the fact that tom brady and...
ken if the patriots win it is your fault
still time for the patriots to win this because you did not...
I was kind of counting on you taking of from social media...
i think it's nice, they are trying to preserve your dignity...
just hit ALT-F3 to reveal codes
to take a screenshot in Mac OS X, type Command + Shift + 4;...
probably your will
sure but who will i edit it for?
@KenSilverstein1 @leahfinnegan sure but who will i edit it for?
i think you can only pin your own tweets
After reading your tweets I've decided to root for the...
@KenSilverstein1 After reading your tweets I've decided to root for the Patriots.
it's like five albums of *exactly* that sound all the way...
chromatics are gooooooood
you are no true friend
omg
also amazing pic glad to know who took it
what sport is it tho?
@GrizzyBusy what sport is it tho?
a little but i think true errol morris voice is when he...
you know what these are? [takes out a thumb drive] these...
you know what these are? [takes out a thumb drive] these are the y combinator decks.
You see this watch? [Yeah.] This watch controls my car!...
You see this watch? [Yeah.
second prize is a set of sushikiri, third prize is you're...
put the kombucha down kombucha is for people who optimize...
god tho glengarry glen ross but remade with VCs
Being excluded from opportunity sure makes people lose...
Being excluded from opportunity sure makes people lose their sense of humor.
nothing i've read online has prepared me for the words...
welp time to move on to the next deadline wait they...
welp time to move on to the next deadline wait they remastered grim fandango.
we just all think we're garbage
my shrink says it's about ADEQUACY and in 99% of the 7000...
@sprynmr @danielpunkass @Gimletmedia my shrink says it's about ADEQUACY and in 99% of the 7000 anxieties I've seen it's true.
i can't share the data but the language is identical from...
you should see the signups. we're all exactly the same.
@danielpunkass you should see the signups. we're all exactly the same.
i just want to say that this was my greatest tweet
it's true
they didn't understand so I explained that you were a very...
the important thing is that I get 15%
scooting, cinnamon apples, hello kitty, leggings,...
My kids are learning to write at nursery school but where...
My kids are learning to write at nursery school but where can I find a program that will teach them to pitch?
I would never objectify women like that
I'm late on four deadlines
i'm worth 1/10,000th regular people
of course i retweet that but i'm late on a deadline
theyre the WORST
if you like me hate birds you will really hate this new...
if you like me hate birds you will really hate this new well-designed pro-bird website http://www. audubon.
omg fuck this
that was really great and comforting and fun. thank you.
@blprnt that was really great and comforting and fun. thank you.
thank you
you renamed boromir?
@eventi you renamed boromir?
they don't care about us
your mom was not ejected properly
also u know the edge? From u2? He did 9/11
@KenSilverstein1 @leahfinnegan @laura_june also u know the edge? From u2?
laura bush killed someone with a car. Matthew Broderick too.
@KenSilverstein1 @leahfinnegan @laura_june laura bush killed someone with a car. Matthew Broderick too.
Im gonna send fewer emails more randomly
so just want to say, @mandrillapp will be bringing you...
so just want to say, @mandrillapp will be bringing you anxiety but in a really good way. if i ever get this done.
so @mandrillapp gave me a million emails/month and i was...
mailchimp gave me a million emails
i would never violate privacy. fun fact: ira wanted me to...
@eric_b_wood @iraglass i would never violate privacy. fun fact: ira wanted me to maybe build tavi's website but i was having twins.
i'm learning an unbelievable amount about anxiety
http://anxietybox.com cracked 3,000 signups
http://anxietybox.
Yes, everyone thinks that.
@KenSilverstein1 Yes, everyone thinks that.
Ken you used WordPress for three years when I edited your...
@KenSilverstein1 Ken you used WordPress for three years when I edited your blog. That was WordPress.
leni
hitler was thin
it was cool
yeah wowthat is a stellar resource for bootstrapping a...
gowanus is misspelled
omg no I want ken to explain the Internet
oof
I bent down today and saw lights
If I owned a bar where cool dads could hang and talk about...
If I owned a bar where cool dads could hang and talk about their lives I'd call it Sinuses.
ACELA: CLINTON'S TRUE LEGACY On December 11, 2000, the...
Once, a person jumped in front of my Acela to commit...
@KenSilverstein1 Once, a person jumped in front of my Acela to commit suicide and people yelled at the distraught employees to hurry up.
it sounds like you want to know are bots
i mean seen another way those are all bots
amazingly few sadly
ulgh
the internet as implemented is basically ironic
ben email tho
i'm a serial nontrepreneur
yah that RESTish API is sweetness i hate port 25 with a...
thanks! sending!
@markdicristina @anildash @tcarmody @MailChimp thanks! sending!
Mark! Now that I understand Mandrill better it is coming...
@markdicristina @anildash @tcarmody @MailChimp Mark! Now that I understand Mandrill better it is coming into focus.
hah no just was looking at a tumblr
whoa
i genuinely want to see it played
how do you even win
what sport is this https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/5601852...
what sport is this https://twitter.
this might be the worst pitch i've ever seen
is that the end of the story
wait
wait ken what sport is this https://twitter.com/ftrain/statu...
@KenSilverstein1 @leahfinnegan wait ken what sport is this https://twitter.
my wife went to santa cruz with the banana slugs, like I...
@KenSilverstein1 @leahfinnegan my wife went to santa cruz with the banana slugs, like I get it but also: http://omnia-extares. tumblr.
lots of schools have ironic mascots but that motto is the...
Omnia Extares is MUCH, MUCH worse
you have got to be shitting me
hoooooly shit it's Omnia Extares meaning "let it all hang...
not a MASCOT but a motto
does evergreen have a motto?
@KenSilverstein1 @leahfinnegan does evergreen have a motto?
he co-founded counterpunch so the fact that he's not...
it's like 80,000 pixels tall at full resolution
ken i pasted in a link to the article at the web archive...
@KenSilverstein1 @leahfinnegan ken i pasted in a link to the article at the web archive http://web. archive.
yeah no that's gone away forever
i had to do all the HTML by hand. but so worth it.
@leahfinnegan @KenSilverstein1 i had to do all the HTML by hand. but so worth it.
we worked a ton on those tables. good times.
@KenSilverstein1 @leahfinnegan we worked a ton on those tables. good times.
oh shit http://web.archive.org/web/20070608012023/http://www...
@KenSilverstein1 @leahfinnegan oh shit http://web. archive.
My thoughts at the time: “at least it's not Equatorial...
@leahfinnegan @KenSilverstein1 My thoughts at the time: “at least it's not Equatorial Guinea.
that'll double their monthly traffic
http://harpers.org/blog/2009/10/how-awful-is-richard-cohen-l...
@KenSilverstein1 http://harpers. org/blog/2009/10/how-awful-is-richard-cohen-let-us-count-the-ways/ http://harpers.
richard cohen
i mean just like that's so much hate that the screenshot...
i mean just like that's so much hate that the screenshot tool on this 8GbRAM 2.
but don't worry, moore's law suggests that one day...
there's so much harassment on http://femfreq.tumblr.com/post...
there's so much harassment on http://femfreq. tumblr.
“Somewhere in some wall there was a transmitter sending out...
“Somewhere in some wall there was a transmitter sending out signals that only the lights could hear. ” — @jessamyn https://medium.
This evocative kicker, thought a columnist, will heal...
This evocative kicker, thought a columnist, will heal democracy.
Maybe today will be the day social media drives a...
Maybe today will be the day social media drives a meteorologist to suicide.
adam
hahahahahsha
whoa
she gets frustrated when people in the media give men...
sjörkin
when she watched sitcoms starring robin Williams and Pam...
she likes pjörk chops
she's moving to Njörk!
@leahfinnegan she's moving to Njörk!
so how's the liberal media this evening?
@KenSilverstein1 @natashavc so how's the liberal media this evening?
The last time it snowed like this I wrote this essay:...
The last time it snowed like this I wrote this essay: http://www. themorningnews.
omgyourrite
i tweeted about bitcoin and then realized
http://www.nytimes.com/video/sports/100000003040466/inside-t...
@john_overholt http://www. nytimes.
i'll be waiting
we had a fiesta
we can solve two problems. turn off your phone and stop...
@KenSilverstein1 @mitchsunderland we can solve two problems. turn off your phone and stop tweeting.
ken
my wife just came into my office and said, "he's using a...
ken you are using a phone or computer to tweet
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jaguar_%28beverage%29
@mmcwatters http://en. wikipedia.
no but really https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/559416460813...
@mmcwatters no but really https://twitter.
idea: a bunch of memes of people doing horrifying stuff in...
idea: a bunch of memes of people doing horrifying stuff in various states of undress.
also if you read it you'll see that i am being a terrible...
oh i'm fine! that's more something i went looking for after...
@asad_ch oh i'm fine!
Here's a great thing to read when you're feeling a little...
Here's a great thing to read when you're feeling a little sorry for yourself it always cheers me right up http://harpers. org/wp-content/uploads/HarpersMagazine-1998-01-0059425.
it's for old people
since we'll all be cooped up on monday i hope there will be...
Wikipedia is the good 4chan in the same way that Bitcoin is...
@nslater Wikipedia is the good 4chan in the same way that Bitcoin is the evil Unix.
its cool that spam is a humanist discipline
This is a fascinating Wikipedia page that is basically...
This is a fascinating Wikipedia page that is basically useless http://en. m.
check urbandictionary
whoa "one of us"
nah because every message is personalized and private, and...
Also, I'm not broke. I'm just incredibly cheap.
Also, I'm not broke. I'm just incredibly cheap.
One signup per minute. https://twitter.com/ftrain/status/559...
One signup per minute. https://twitter.
if could have been a man's staff recommended by medium's...
hello! i will reach out when this comes into focus
@markdicristina @anildash @tcarmody @MailChimp hello!
ad jargon. M is thousand and MM is million.
@nslater ad jargon. M is thousand and MM is million.
i think about this a lot, like basically everyone is...
@kjhealy i think about this a lot, like basically everyone is bananas and then there's pandoc, which is rational. or like, a large bridge.
it's going to be on this american life and i'll get 1K+...
well...that's sort of the point of it, this was a one-off...
@erico @esd well... that's sort of the point of it, this was a one-off and now there's demand http://gimletmedia.
oh i am never going to do more than skim that shit for...
@kjhealy oh i am never going to do more than skim that shit for debugging. makes me too panicked.
transactional--each one a snowflake produced by a bot. AWS...
@esd transactional--each one a snowflake produced by a bot. AWS SES is prob my best bet, people are saying?
3,000--it's very high-volume by design but super opt-in
nope
it was also, you can only have 500 simultaneous recipients,...
@mattlanger it was also, you can only have 500 simultaneous recipients, etc. http://tilde.
there is some limit; it's in the docs but a little vague. i...
@mattlanger there is some limit; it's in the docs but a little vague. i think it MAY be 5k/day?
doesn't it max at like, 3K emails/day? (I ran into that...
@mattlanger doesn't it max at like, 3K emails/day? (I ran into that with http://tilde.
alas every email is personalized AND private and looks...
@Heewa alas every email is personalized AND private and looks spammy (but is totally opt-in). I think SES from Amazon is probably best bet.
not all of us have sexy mailchimp sponsorships
nah it'll be fine i'm just scaling
A real fact is that I am supporting my passion for software...
A real fact is that I am supporting my passion for software platform architecture with my day job as a literary essayist.
wait wait let a man decide how he's going to architect his...
I think the conclusion is: SES, maybe with sendy (although...
lol
why not skip pharma and just go straight to militias and...
@anildash why not skip pharma and just go straight to militias and baby farms?
i think we'll hit the spam wall so fast because...
@fivetonsflax i think we'll hit the spam wall so fast because http://anxietybox.
that's just an SES wrapper alas but still more in the...
@maxfenton that's just an SES wrapper alas but still more in the ballpark!
i may ask! i'll see if > 1000 people sign up, and costs...
@GlennF i may ask! i'll see if &gt; 1000 people sign up, and costs only will get prohibitive for me at 5,000+.
yeah i noticed that trying to get email working on...
@bn2b yeah i noticed that trying to get email working on http://tilde.
Cool! Ping ford@ftrain.com? Zero obligation but it'd be...
@philnelson Cool! Ping ford @ftrain .
“We'll figure out revenue later.” —People who have no money
“We'll figure out revenue later.
meanwhile I *know* email is a disaster because i tried to...
I can probably afford SES if I get MailChimp to sponsor me.
I can probably afford SES if I get MailChimp to sponsor me.
that's bearable. i can do that.
@rad_fax @chrisdary that's bearable. i can do that.
oh fuck i'm a moron
so http://anxietybox.com is tricky because it's 150-300...
so http://anxietybox. com is tricky because it's 150-300 custom emails per user per month, so 1000 users = 300M; 10,000 = 3MM &amp; it's...
that's like $60,000 of sheer emotional pain per moment
like i know 25 and 80 are different ports but the delta is...
does anyone know how to send 1.5 million txt emails/mo...
does anyone know how to send 1. 5 million txt emails/mo without going broke?
i opened semi-official signups on http://anxietybox.com/...
i opened semi-official signups on http://anxietybox.
because you love feist?
@KenSilverstein1 @leahfinnegan because you love feist?
With yellow feathers in her hair and a dress cut down to...
@leahfinnegan With yellow feathers in her hair and a dress cut down to there?
ken I need your password and your flip phone
this is a great ad until the end, when the mothers should...
this is a great ad until the end, when the mothers should have formed an armed collective &amp; destroyed the kyriarchy https://www. youtube.
right but the speed of that is increasing! c.f....
@markjaquith @anildash @waldojaquith @gknauss right but the speed of that is increasing! c.
feels like amazon lambda is in this direction
Yeah, I mean those costs will always out themselves...
@markjaquith @anildash @waldojaquith @gknauss Yeah, I mean those costs will always out themselves somewhere. It's a tough business!
But migration costs, one week schedule, labor costs,...
@anildash @markjaquith @waldojaquith @gknauss But migration costs, one week schedule, labor costs, etc--it just doesn't make sense here.
VIP is great, I work with people who use it and I like WP.
@anildash @markjaquith @waldojaquith @gknauss VIP is great, I work with people who use it and I like WP.
Also I'm pretty sure Greg cost less than VIP.
@anildash @markjaquith @waldojaquith Also I'm pretty sure Greg cost less than VIP.
page caching is kind of 2003 tbh compared to heavy write...
make sure to tell ken what snapchat is
"molestor investor" has been sitting there for what, a...
@natashavc @leahfinnegan @KenSilverstein1 @johnjcook "molestor investor" has been sitting there for what, a month? no one.
mile lie club
As to better heds: “Jet logs prove link be tween Clinton...
ken, you don't have any meetings to cancel
wait wait wait
The point is that fatties are actually psychics with secret...
The point is that fatties are actually psychics with secret powers and Little Debbie is a government front.
you are a true friend
I don't think it is fiction tbh
yes
Lots of scenes where a government e-meter shows that...
Marzipan Attacks
The hard part is the title. So far I have the chewlumminati
The hard part is the title.
hah trick question no one knows
So the obesity epidemic is actually the product of the...
So the obesity epidemic is actually the product of the military-snack complex keeping us listless and passive and easy to track.
I have this plot idea that in the 60s the CIA noticed that...
I have this plot idea that in the 60s the CIA noticed that some people were psychic and invented a carb ray that made everyone fat.
can someone start http://nazifacts.kinja.com tx
@KenSilverstein1 @natashavc @leahfinnegan @johnjcook can someone start http://nazifacts. kinja.
hahahaha but I think I was overreacting
yep
fixed!
@worldmattworld fixed!
“‘It’s her real butt,’ said Hershkovits.”...
“‘It’s her real butt,’ said Hershkovits. ” https://medium.
I wrote about the most interesting part of getting Kim...
I wrote about the most interesting part of getting Kim Kardashian's butt online, the web scaling part: https://medium.
You know the restraint that was applied here, the pain that...
@marklotto @anildash You know the restraint that was applied here, the pain that I experienced?
How PAPER Magazine’s web engineers scaled Kim Kardashian’s back-end (SFW)
How PAPER Magazine’s web engineers scaled their back-end for Kim Kardashian (SFW) #BreakTheInternet? On November 11th 2014, the art-and-nightlife magazine PAPER “broke the Internet” when it put a Jean-Paul Goude photograph of a well-oiled, mostly-nude Kim Kardashian on its cover and posted the same nude photos of Kim Kardashian to its website (NSFW).
great suggestion! done
@qrush great suggestion!
I miss the 1989-era DPaintIV animation dialogue box, and...
I miss the 1989-era DPaintIV animation dialogue box, and one day I hope I can have it on my networked supercomputer http://ftrain. github.
I'm trying hard to get more stuff off my hard drive and...
I'm trying hard to get more stuff off my hard drive and into the world, even if it's busted http://ftrain. github.
I made this silly broken toy http://ftrain.github.io/anim/...
I made this silly broken toy http://ftrain. github.
in before local cache refresh https://twitter.com/ftrain/sta...
in before local cache refresh https://twitter.
It turns out the place is going to send me a tote bag so...
It turns out the place is going to send me a tote bag so scratch that. Passive-aggressive subtweeting is a bad look, I'm off-premises.
god not you too
guys what if we're dead and this is hell
i considered the discussion that was going to ensue and...
i'm sorry patrick you weren't supposed to know
Colgate University has a raaaaaaaaaaaacist Yik Yak:...
Colgate University has a raaaaaaaaaaaacist Yik Yak: http://gimletmedia.
wait who is that he has hair privilege
my privilege does the craziest shit
the ladies at the daycare send their kids to other daycares
it's in my head now you monster
patrick the ladies from the islands who are running daycare...
This is awesome.
This is awesome.
Dr. King he had a dream/of peace and harmony. P E A C E, P...
Dr. King he had a dream/of peace and harmony.
There is a song about Martin Luther King to the tune of...
There is a song about Martin Luther King to the tune of BINGO and my kids apparently know it.
I'm not surprised that someone who organizes books by color...
@tonygill99 @pleasetakenote I'm not surprised that someone who organizes books by color would become violent so quickly.
see tim the risks are real
I will just put it up. No big deal, just need a couple...
@mathewi I will just put it up. No big deal, just need a couple hours to turn it on and connect it to services.
oh no I brought the fight home
So I made this bot that emailed me a few times a day to...
So I made this bot that emailed me a few times a day to parody my anxiety. Now I am getting hundreds of anxious emails a day about the bot.
thanks
can't comment so I just look at the page and think things
but the REAL bookshelves are behind those right, right...
@karenmcgrane but the REAL bookshelves are behind those right, right McGrane, right? Right?
People who sort books by color are dead-souled monsters who...
People who sort books by color are dead-souled monsters who hate truth.
all i'm saying is that this is a high-stakes game and it's...
Shouldn't you be working on a unified global platform that...
@replyall @arainert Shouldn't you be working on a unified global platform that successfully monetizes podcasts while ensuring quality?
also you are correct
A genuinely cool feeling is when you wear a pair of...
A genuinely cool feeling is when you wear a pair of slightly tight pants and all morning it's like you have a self-propelled exoskeleton.
ULGH fuck fuck fuck fuck
i was silverstein punch-up for years, how many ways can a...
one of the toughest jobs in media
I write obituaries for all my friends [LOUD LAUGHTER, TURNS...
@tcarmody @jazzedloon I write obituaries for all my friends [LOUD LAUGHTER, TURNS TO CAMERA].
je suis freedom fries
Every time I go “I need to do more for http://tilde.club”...
Every time I go “I need to do more for http://tilde. club” someone has already done it.
http://squiggle.city/~paper/ is publishing an amazing...
http://squiggle.
I'm wearing a hemp onesie embroidered with the name adnan
also I don't have any live tv
I just got off work I'm waiting for a bus
wow you failed that captcha something awful kell...bot
@kellan wow you failed that captcha something awful kell...
After the plague kills off most of humanity will one...
After the plague kills off most of humanity will one million users be the new ten million users?
what if a tweet ended the world
There is one other person on this Ftrain car at 10pm has...
I take my work seriously.
@KenSilverstein1 @alanagoodman I take my work seriously.
Dark social is just people emailing the words “stop...
Dark social is just people emailing the words “stop tweeting.
cool story
perfect tx
I have to relaunch anxietybox to deal with all these...
@AGoldmund @replyall I have to relaunch anxietybox to deal with all these anxious people so yeah you owe me a drawing.
https://archive.org/details/EdwardR.Murrow-BuchenwaldReport
@KenSilverstein1 @leahfinnegan https://archive. org/details/EdwardR.
u left your purse on the train at 4th ave stop pls email...
@aajaynes u left your purse on the train at 4th ave stop pls email ford @ftrain .
I mean it could be that they are trying to do the voice of...
@delfuego I mean it could be that they are trying to do the voice of the bot and joking? Who knows.
Otherwise it's unmanageable.
Otherwise it's unmanageable.
I'm fine if you hate everything I stand for and want me to...
I'm fine if you hate everything I stand for and want me to die in a fire *as long as* you let me know in the form of a pull request.
I'm guessing they are like, doing the bot's voice? Or else...
@sixfoot6 I'm guessing they are like, doing the bot's voice? Or else they hate me?
literally every project https://github.com/ftrain/anxietybox...
literally every project https://github.
I just tried to hand a woman with a toddler the MetroCard...
“How can you make a joke out of everything?” is a question...
“How can you make a joke out of everything? ” is a question that miserable people ask a lot.
Researchers after announcing that they have derived an...
Researchers after announcing that they have derived an algorithm that solves the most dangerous game: “Run!
i am the king of being stupid about websites
seriously i did that to @choire's inbox
well look who decided to come back for a visit
there are like six pages of those
guys how do you think this makes me feel do you think it...
guys how do you think this makes me feel do you think it might make me ANXIOUS https://twitter.
It turns out that extremely anxious people are not patient...
It turns out that extremely anxious people are not patient about websites that are not currently working, go figure.
I'm so liberal I'm raising my children not to see color...
I'm so liberal I'm raising my children not to see color blindness.
andrew I'm reading superintelligence
you know what is going to be worse than twitter when Joan...
@leahfinnegan you know what is going to be worse than twitter when Joan Didion dies? twitter when Philip Roth dies.
Its good to be back here on Twitter talking about how my...
Its good to be back here on Twitter talking about how my train is too hot.
God I'm so tired of meaningful conversations with close and...
God I'm so tired of meaningful conversations with close and trusted friends on Slack.
shani makes the world takes
I'm here
people are wandering in the aisles like a zombie movie
my train is like six billion degrees I'm so warm that it...
I'm at 25 Corporate Drive.
I'm at 25 Corporate Drive.
coolio @anxietyboxbot was gonna just spam anyone who wanted...
nah it can be whatever, MIT or BSD or wevs. Just put it up...
@ckolderup nah it can be whatever, MIT or BSD or wevs. Just put it up last night since the podcast was gonna happen.
The code for it is available at...
The code for it is available at https://github.
I talked about Anxiety Box with @pjvogt....
I talked about Anxiety Box with @pjvogt . http://gimletmedia.
#8 Anxiety Box
January 6, 2015 - Lunch
January 6, 2015 - Breakfast
Dealing with this shit feels like true revenge. Food Qty Calories Cereal breakfast, typical (2 c.
An email I sent about the Chinese Room in 2003
An email I sent about the Chinese Room in 2003 I have 420,000 messages in my mail archive (many of those are from mailing lists, though) and I made them searchable. I keep finding crazy things.
[ANN] The code for 2001's http://www.ftrain.com/cgi-bin/l_op...
[ANN] The code for 2001's http://www. ftrain.