.

 

Career Development: an Artist

Career Development is important to a young fellow's growth.

Career Development

SON: Dad, I'm worried.

DAD: (Putting down pipe) What about, Son?

SON: About what sort of job I'm going to get in this crazy economy.

DAD: God knows, that's a fair concern. The days of job security are over. Even the defense industry is in a shambles.

SON: So what should I do?

DAD: Let me run that one through the ol' meat grinder. (Goes back to his paper. A minute later, his face emerges from the newsprint, pipe returned to his mouth. He folds and drops the paper, and drops the pipe in the ashtray. SON sits and works on a crystal radio set).

DAD: I've got it, yes, I've just got it.

SON: (Looks up) What?

DAD: How about being an artist?

SON: An artist? How? I can barely draw.

DAD: An artist doesn't need to be able to draw. No, what an artist needs is a deep reservoir of personal pain from which he can draw. If you have that, you have the world, and you have Government Funding.

SON: How's that work?

DAD: It's easy. All you need is some personal pain--like an emotional scar from incest. Lean over that table and undo those britches.

SON: What?

DAD: I'm going to rape you. Now keep quiet.

(Sudden blackness. Screams, sounds of tussle, followed by a voiceless noise of a creaking table.

Lights back up.)

DAD: (Cheerful.) There, that's done; let's go upstairs. You're mother's waiting with dinner. And tomorrow we'll go buy the hardware store and buy you some painting supplies--I think you're going to need them.

(Curtain.)


[Top]

Ftrain.com

PEEK

Ftrain.com is the website of Paul Ford and his pseudonyms. It is showing its age. I'm rewriting the code but it's taking some time.

FACEBOOK

There is a Facebook group.

TWITTER

You will regret following me on Twitter here.

EMAIL

Enter your email address:

A TinyLetter Email Newsletter

About the author: I've been running this website from 1997. For a living I write stories and essays, program computers, edit things, and help people launch online publications. (LinkedIn). I wrote a novel. I was an editor at Harper's Magazine for five years; then I was a Contributing Editor; now I am a free agent. I was also on NPR's All Things Considered for a while. I still write for The Morning News, and some other places.

If you have any questions for me, I am very accessible by email. You can email me at ford@ftrain.com and ask me things and I will try to answer. Especially if you want to clarify something or write something critical. I am glad to clarify things so that you can disagree more effectively.

POKE


Syndicate: RSS1.0, RSS2.0
Links: RSS1.0, RSS2.0

Contact

© 1974-2011 Paul Ford

Recent

Recent Offsite Work: Code and Prose. As a hobby I write. (January 14)

Rotary Dial. (August 21)

10 Timeframes. (June 20)

Facebook and Instagram: When Your Favorite App Sells Out. (April 10)

Why I Am Leaving the People of the Red Valley. (April 7)

Welcome to the Company. (September 21)

“Facebook and the Epiphanator: An End to Endings?”. Forgot to tell you about this. (July 20)

“The Age of Mechanical Reproduction”. An essay for TheMorningNews.org. (July 11)

Woods+. People call me a lot and say: What is this new thing? You're a nerd. Explain it immediately. (July 10)

Reading Tonight. Reading! (May 25)

Recorded Entertainment #2, by Paul Ford. (May 18)

Recorded Entertainment #1, by Paul Ford. (May 17)

Nanolaw with Daughter. Why privacy mattered. (May 16)

0h30m w/Photoshop, by Paul Ford. It's immediately clear to me now that I'm writing again that I need to come up with some new forms in order to have fun here—so that I can get a rhythm and know what I'm doing. One thing that works for me are time limits; pencils up, pencils down. So: Fridays, write for 30 minutes; edit for 20 minutes max; and go whip up some images if necessary, like the big crappy hand below that's all meaningful and evocative because it's retro and zoomed-in. Post it, and leave it alone. Can I do that every Friday? Yes! Will I? Maybe! But I crave that simple continuity. For today, for absolutely no reason other than that it came unbidden into my brain, the subject will be Photoshop. (Do we have a process? We have a process. It is 11:39 and...) (May 13)

That Shaggy Feeling. Soon, orphans. (May 12)

Antilunchism, by Paul Ford. Snack trams. (May 11)

Tickler File Forever, by Paul Ford. I'll have no one to blame but future me. (May 10)

Time's Inverted Index, by Paul Ford. (1) When robots write history we can get in trouble with our past selves. (2) Search-generated, "false" chrestomathies and the historical fallacy. (May 9)

Bantha Tracks. (May 5)

The Moral Superiority of the Streetcar. (1) Long-form journalism fixes everything. (2) The moral superiority of the streetcar. (3) I like big bus and I cannot lie. (May 4)

More...
Tables of Contents